Super Bowl weekend. For America’s degenerate gamblers it’s like Christmas, St. Patrick’s Day and the Day of Eternal Judgment all rolled into one. The so-called experts estimate that over $100 million wordwide could change hands in bets on the Super Bowl this year. Slightly less than that will probably be wagered on Saturday night’s UFC 126, but as long as some of it winds up in your pocket, who’s complaining? To help you in that quest for the rich stuff, the Gambling Addiction Enabler is back.
See below for fight odds as of this writing (they appear to be changing pretty fast, more evidence that there are lot of bored gamblers playing out the string until Sunday’s kickoff). An explanation of what it all means is right here, though if you need that right now might not be the best time to jump into this thing with both feet. For the rest of you, let’s start earning, shall we?
Anderson Silva (-280) vs. Vitor Belfort (+225)
Forrest Griffin (+145) vs. Rich Franlkin (-175)
Jake Ellenberger (-400) vs. Carlos Eduard Rocha (+260)
Jon Jones (-350) vs. Ryan Bader (+270)
Miguel Torres (-500) vs. Antonio Banuelos (+325)
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Paul Kelly (+260) vs. Donald Cerrone (-340)
Chad Mendes (-300) vs. Michihiro Omigawa (+265)
Demetrious Johnson (+115) vs. Norifumi "Kid" Yamamoto (-140)
Gabe Ruediger (+170) vs. Paul Taylor (-210)
Kyle Kingsbury (-145) vs. Ricardo Romero (+115)
Mike Pierce (-325) vs. Kenny Robertson (+250)
The Main Event: Vitor Belfort will break your heart, son. Believe that. I know he looks intriguing at +225, but keep in mind this is a man with a decade-long track record of fading down the stretch in big fights. If he’s going to beat Andy Silva, it’ll likely have to be an early knockout. If this thing goes to deep water, I can’t see Belfort hanging with the champ. Meanwhile, Silva is just as worthless at -280. You’ve got money you won’t miss, are buying into the hype of Belfort as Silva’s “biggest test on the feet” and think the 35-year-old “Spider” ain’t what he used to be? Lay it (softly). Otherwise, steer clear.
The Fight for the Future: How do you balance the fact that Ryan Bader opened paying out a whopping +270 against the cold reality that absolutely nobody likes him to beat Jon Jones? Answer: Fuck everybody. Exercise some restraint, but bet Bader here, especially if you’re a big shot, rolling around with the pockets of your skinny jeans overflowing with Monopoly money. Is it crazy? Sure it is, but that’s why they call it gambling. I legitimately think this fight will be closer than most people expect and with odds like that I would gladly lose a comparatively small sum for the chance at fairly epic returns on my investment.
The Good Dogs: Well, I feel compelled to point out that oddmakers went ahead and made the No. 4 featherweight in the world (Omigawa) damn near a 3-1 underdog against a dude (Mendes) who has yet to crack the 145-pound Top 10 in either the Sherdog or USA Today consensus rankings. Then again, Omigawa is winless in the Octagon and will be making his first stateside appearance since 2008. Meanwhile, there’s absolutely no way to tell exactly how good Mendes could be. Eh, take Omigawa. At least if he loses you won’t be the only one who looks like a fool.
There are some other compelling underdogs on this card, though the odds aren’t quite as eye-popping. Considering his size advantage and the fact that Rich Franklin hasn’t seemed totally pumped about fighting at 205-pounds, take a flier on Forrest Griffin at +145. In addition, it’s not totally out of the question that Rocha (+260), Rudiger (+170) and Romero (+115) could all sneak out with victories. That’s right, we’re playing the Rs.
Official CagePotato Players Ball Parlay Party: Well, they’re favorites for a reason. You want a sure thing, combo Torres + Jones + Yamamoto + Pierce. You have the itch to get crazy? Throw whichever dog you like best on the end. It’s me? I’d take FoGriff. Just don’t come around crying when said dog blows up your spot. Oh, and take the Pack (-2.5) over Rapelisberger and the Steelers on Sunday in Dallas. You just can’t fuck with Aaron Rodgers right now.