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Gambling Addiction Enabler: UFC 89

(Bisping challenges another poor bloke to high-stakes Rock, Paper, Scissors.)

As our collective faith in the health of the economy deteriorates, the online gambling market is looking better and better. The more I think about it, the more I’m surprised it didn’t come up in last night’s debates. But once again neither candidate speaks to my issues. Looks like this is one more election year where I’ll end up scrawling “Wanderlei” in crayon across my ballot and then handing it to the overweight woman at the desk, who will inevitably respond by insisting that “this is not a polling place.” Goddamn bureaucracy.

Anyway, if you’re like me and are ready to bet your foreclosed home on UFC 89 this Saturday, here are the sweetest lines around, courtesy of If you don’t understand how betting odds work, read this. If you still don’t get it, stop sniffing glue.

Chris Leben (+191) vs. Michael Bisping (-211)
Luiz Cane (+104) vs. Rameau Thierry Sokoudjou (-114)
Dan Hardy (+285) vs. Akihiro Gono (-308)
Neil Wann (+600) vs. Shane Carwin (-675)
Keith Jardine (+155) vs. Brandon Vera (-165)
Jess Liaudin (+141) vs. David Bielkheden (-135)
Marcus Davis (+230) vs. Paul Kelly (+285)
Paul Taylor (+300) vs. Chris Lytle (-328)
Samy Schiavo (+166) vs. Per Eklund (-180)
Terry Etim (+275) vs. Sam Stout (-291)
David Baron (+155) vs. Jim Miller (-172)


WTF!?: Wait a minute, how can the lines on the Davis/Kelly fight put both men at better than 2-1 underdogs? Isn’t some offshore betting website assuring itself of losing money here? Well, yes and no. Because BestFightOdds is good enough to compile the odds from several different sources, we occasionally get a glimpse of the wildly different perspectives among bookies. Basically, every oddsmaker except Sportbet sees Davis as somewhere in the neighborhood of a 3-1 favorite. But Sportbet has Kelly as the heavy favorite. Could it be that they know something most don’t? Or are they just retards hellbent on losing money? Guess we’ll find out Saturday.

I can’t believe it’s so close!: Not saying Luiz Cane is a punk — far from it — but I’m a little surprised that Sokoudjou isn’t a heavier favorite in this one. The more seasoning and training he gets, the scarier he becomes. Cane is a dangerous fellow himself but as we all know, “The African Assassin” is intent on getting that paper.

Big money underdog of the night: Naturally, the guys who are only slight underdogs — Leben, Jardine, Cane, et al — have legitimate shots at victory. But if you’re the type who isn’t happy unless he’s betting on a long shot, Dan Hardy is your man. Gono is a tough opponent for anyone (even if he seems more interested in his entrance than his fight), but Hardy is no slouch either. He’s fighting in his home country, hailing from what I thought was the fictional town of Nottingham, and he just might surprise some people.

Not even close: Depending on the oddsmaker, Shane Carwin will either murder Neil Wann or perhaps merely cripple him. -675 is the best you’ll find on Carwin. Other oddsmakers have him at -700, and one even puts him at -1100. There are instances of child abuse where the odds are closer than that. I would now like to apologize for the previous sentence.

Cagepotato Comments

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babcocck- October 16, 2008 at 9:29 am
Is Vera really the favorite?? seriously?? I think the Dean of Mean is gonna Jardine/Machida the hell out of Vera, i hope to see the real "Truth" but it just dont seem likely. If he does win and hopefully in exciting fashion that would make 205 that much more interesting
online gambling- October 16, 2008 at 5:01 am
I've always enjoyed boxing, and the UFC is much more exciting than that.
bfowlkes- October 15, 2008 at 8:56 pm
@Ron, the odds changed since this article went up. That happens when a bunch of people jump on a bet all at once. BestFightOdds has a history function where you can see the dramatic change in the Davis odds since this morning. It went from +230 to -325 in a matter of hours.
brettzky- October 15, 2008 at 8:04 pm
fuck they changed those odds or there was a guranteed profit on arbitrage fuckkkk. 10,000 on both and ur guaranteed to win at least 3 g's
Anonymous- October 15, 2008 at 6:47 pm
betting on jardine is easily the safest upset.
UFC fan- October 15, 2008 at 6:17 pm
my top 3 upsets are Leben,Jardine, and Taylor for the win.
Jugger- October 15, 2008 at 5:48 pm
"-Gono will win by submission. We will find out later that Gono was just dry humping Hardy’s arm & that the arm-bar position was just happenstance."

Get Deadpanda a T-shirt, Please. K? Bye bye.
Ron- October 15, 2008 at 5:43 pm
That Davis line is wrong.

He is the underdog on no sites.

If you click the link in your article you can actually see that.
Jburg- October 15, 2008 at 5:09 pm
Wow the Davis and Kelly thing is retarded. Throw 100 dollars on each and you are guaranteed to win at least $30 maybe 85. Throw 1000 down on each and you win 300, maybe 850 dollars. Is this a joke?
Fully- October 15, 2008 at 4:59 pm
Pound both Davis and Paul Kelly as dogs on those respective sites and you are guaranteed to make money
Deadpanda- October 15, 2008 at 4:57 pm
-Bisping will hit the "throw a KO punch" button on Chris Leben's chin with a strate jab & get KTFO.
-Sokoudjou will simply mutate into a lion-man-beast & maul his opponent to deadth.
-Gono will win by submission. We will find out later that Gono was just dry humping Hardy's arm & that the arm-bar position was just happenstance.
-In the stare-down before the fight, Neil Wann's head will simply explode. Carwin wins.
-Vera will cut Jardine open early in the fight with a big knee. He will then break into a victory dance in front of the still standing & very confused Jardine. Jardine then knocks Vera out in what will be know across the internet as "You got served."
-Stout will come out blazing with his striking, Etim will successfully counter punch with the jab until Stout rocks him with a big punch. Stout will then get caught in a triangle choke trying to finish the fight. Stout will later be seen crying.
Jeffro- October 15, 2008 at 4:49 pm
Luiz Cane = Easy Money.

The guy is extremely underrated. Check out some of his fights in brasil. I was hoping he was going to be a bigger underdog.
Bill C.- October 15, 2008 at 4:29 pm
Carwin in Round 1 via Fatality.
Heston- October 15, 2008 at 4:26 pm
I will be backin Etim for the win probably by submission hes gone the distance with both Tibau and Clementi,I really like his chances.
Mark- October 15, 2008 at 4:22 pm
I am a huge Leben fan. Love to watch his steady maturation in the sport and love how the kid fights. I always root for him, but i just dont see him pulling this one out. It seems like Bisping has got a solid chin and unless he gets really caught i dont see Leben getting the KO. I think bisping is gunna control this fight with his finess and grind out a boring decision.
Kirky- October 15, 2008 at 3:44 pm
I can see bisping hammering leben, unless he gets caught, but I'm pretty sure he is technical enough to avoid too much damage from lebens recklessness
Mark- October 15, 2008 at 3:33 pm
The poor bloke in the picture looks like Elvis Sinesonic - pardon my spelling i dont have the inclination to look it up. But if it does turn out to be him i feel like i just earned myself one of those fancy CagePotato t-shirts. holla at me CP.
Geriatric Peon- October 15, 2008 at 3:30 pm
"There are instances of child abuse where the odds are closer than that. "

- this is why I visit this website priceless October 15, 2008 at 3:30 pm
I actually think it might be worth throwing a few bucks on Terry Etim - Etim has a lot of submission wins and his losses in the UFC are to Clementi and Tibau, both game opponents. If it goes to the ground don't count on Stout to do much.