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Gina Carano Joins ‘American Gladiators’

Apparently tired of being America’s most highly regarded female mixed martial artist, Gina Carano has decided to to try her hand at firing tennis balls from a cannon. The American Gladiators blog (yes, such a thing exists) reports that “The Beautiful Disaster” has joined the cast of the legendary athletic competition show, which is being re-made by NBC in light of the ongoing WGA writer’s strike; AG premieres on January 6th, and Carano’s gladiator name will be “Crush.” Her fellow female gladiators — Siren, Stealth, Venom, Helga (?), and a pre-op transsexual named Fury — all come from a bodybuilding background. No word yet on who will play the deaf one.

It’s sad to consider it, but this is undeniably the beginning of the end of Carano’s MMA career. Nobody would put themselves through the humiliation of crawling around inside a metal hamster-ball while wearing hot-pink spandex unless they had network television ambitions to begin with. Carano most likely saw Gladiators as her ticket to a guest spot on Law and Order: SVU, followed by roles in romantic comedies as Sandra Bullock’s younger sister. And I really hope it’s worth it for her, because her hiatus/retirement would mean that women’s MMA loses its marketable mascot. So let’s all be bitter at Gina, and console ourselves with the fact that she’ll be spending the winter dealing with douchebags like these:

(Mike “Titan” O’Hearn)

(Don “Wolf” Yates)

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