(Photo via Catone’s twitter.)
Testosterone replacement therapy may be one of the primary go-tos among fighters looking to gain an edge over their competition these days, but there’s another equally insidious, ever-expanding method of chicanery being utilized by cheaters far and wide that makes TRT look like a dinosaur technology. I’m talking of course, about MMA fighters smuggling food beneath their skin.
Yes, much like boxers have been caught with metal-plated gloves, more and more MMA fighters are being busted for Culinary Subepidermal Contraband, or hoarding food items beneath the skin, to apparently gain an advantage in the cage. Following his fight with Stipe Miocic at UFC on FOX 10, Gabriel Gonzaga was caught with a stack of oatmeal cookies stuffed into his hand, and just earlier today, middleweight Nick Catone posted the above photo to his Twitter account.
As you can clearly see, Catone, who has struggled with injuries for the majority of his career, replaced his left knee with a grapefruit (or possibly a cantaloupe) at some point prior to his split decision win over Tom Watson at UFC 169 last weekend and is now gloating about it with the above photo, sarcastically adding “Happy to get my hand raised tonight. Unfortunately I’m stuck in a terrible hospital in Newark with a torn ACL.”
Right, Mr. Catone. Tell me more about this “torn ACL” you speak of. A middle finger to the sport of MMA if I’ve ever seen one before.
CagePotato currently has its crack team of top scientists investigating what the possible benefits of CSC are, exactly, and we will update you once they finish pouring liquids from beakers into other beakers. In the mean time, watch your back, Catone. We’re onto you. (*gives Jack Byrnes “watching you” gesture*)