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Here We Go Again: Steven Seagal Volunteers to Help Secure Texas-Mexico Borders

(“The Glimmer Man” trying to pretend that he knows what the f*ck his new boss is talking about)

Well, Steven Seagal finally fooled someone into taking him up on his offer of unsolicited help.

The 59-year-old actor, who claims he was a CIA operative in the 80s and whose most recent stint as a peace officer, which was documented on his A&E reality television series Steven Seagal: Lawman, ended abruptly when he was charged with sexual harassment of his female assistant, was sworn in this week as the Hudspeth County Sheriff’s Office’s newest deputy. Officials with the department say that his primary focus will be working full time to help secure the U.S.-Mexico border in Texas.

Seagal contacted Sheriff Arvin West two months ago to apply for work with the HCSO and according to him, he feels that his intentions were honorable.

“It became very clear to me that Mr. Seagal is not in this for the celebrity or the publicity,” Sheriff Arvin West told the San Antonio Express today. “He’s like the rest of us that live down here; he has a sincere passion for his country and he wants to do more to help.The television aspect of what we’re doing here is the last priority.The man has a pure motive in doing this. He knows what we’re up against here and he wants to help.”

Seagal was sworn in as the “deputy chief to the chief deputy,” a position that was created for the 7th Dan in Akido, who claims to have taught “his sons”  UFC middleweight champion Anderson Silva and Lyoto Machida a few of the deadly techniques of the martial art. On Monday, he did a dry run as a border patrol agent and will apparently start his new gig, which incidentally pays $15-per-hour, some time in 2012.

“He got really a taste of what we go through down here,” department spokesman Gary Fleming said. “We ran about 50 miles of the border and Deputy Seagal got a chance to meet the community and where he’s going to be working.”

HT to reader Matt Wolf for the story tip.

Cagepotato Comments

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badkarmaPhD- October 17, 2011 at 6:52 am
Steven Seagal is an Aikido master, an 80's movie icon, and a secret government agent. That said, Aikido is as relevant to MMA as Tai Chi, the 80's are long over, and the CIA thing was his attempt to stay in the limelight 20 YEARS ago. If we insist on talking about him, let's limit the conversation to how he used to bang Kelly Lebrock.
warchief65- October 15, 2011 at 11:23 am
All you people are soooooo jealous of Seagal,that it makes me sick ! Canadians ? Have you EVER seen an illegal Canadian ? And I guess you voted for Comrade Obama , twice ! What's next ? Those sneaky Israelis are about to take over the world , Pinky ?
his dudeness- October 15, 2011 at 10:44 am
Why is this shit on an MMA website?
intercept440- October 15, 2011 at 10:02 am
lex there is a shoulder strap. it goes over his right shoiulder and connects to the left rail of the barrel shroud...
mmaandrew34- October 15, 2011 at 9:55 am
good protect the borders and stay as far away as you can from mma seagal find another desperate way to stay in the lime light
Spunderpants- October 15, 2011 at 7:20 am
They should have awarded him position of Junior International State Marshall or JISM for short.
zhmmgg- October 15, 2011 at 6:49 am
good films in ,welcome to visit ,thanks
kurtzkurt- October 15, 2011 at 6:06 am
can we not talk about this moron anymore, please?!
RwilsonR- October 15, 2011 at 12:26 am
So when he is shooting guns he opts not to wear his shooting glasses?
Del Fuego- October 14, 2011 at 11:10 pm
He will teaching the border patrol the "front snap kick". Those illegals won't have a chance.
Todd M- October 14, 2011 at 8:56 pm
$15 an hour to work border patrol? Gee Whiz I wonder why so many Mexicans are making it through?
ElSuperTerrible- October 14, 2011 at 5:55 pm
My drill sergeant would have smoked me for a fucking hour if I'd ever held my weapon like that.
Jiu-Jitsu Jer- October 14, 2011 at 5:50 pm
Seagals got a new clock ..... it goes, cuckoo,cuckoo
Lex Talionis- October 14, 2011 at 5:09 pm
Wow, look at that limp wrist. For the love of god someone get this guy a shoulder strap
Fried Taco- October 14, 2011 at 4:04 pm
@J-Dog - the orders the chief deputy gave him are: "if my gardner, maid, or nanny try to cross back into Mexico, shoot them!"
guy_incognito- October 14, 2011 at 3:45 pm
Curses danomite you beat me to it. I was going to wonder if he also recently purchased a beet farm
El Guapo- October 14, 2011 at 2:15 pm
Nice, Skeletor. Very nice. And I didn't know Seagal got charged with sexual herassment(that's how is SHOULD be spelled, if you ask me).
SnackDaddy- October 14, 2011 at 1:54 pm
Obviously the only reason Segal has taken this job is to spy on John Jones's camp for the upcoming Machida fight.
El Famous Burrito- October 14, 2011 at 1:37 pm
Steven Segal can stand at the border with his gun and squint all he wants. When the illegals start using catapults there won't be a damn thing he can do about it.
J-Dog- October 14, 2011 at 1:11 pm
I saw on South Park this week that all the Mexicans are trying to go SOUTH over the border back into Mexico.
Ringo- October 14, 2011 at 1:02 pm
At least the illegals will keep him busy for right now so we don't have to hear about him on mma for a lil while, too bad for machida right?
RSparrow- October 14, 2011 at 12:52 pm
He must have caught wind about something positive happening at the borders, and is going to run and tell everyone he had everything to do with it. Fuckface.
skeletor- October 14, 2011 at 12:42 pm
I don't know about you guys but I feel this is a step in the right direction for this country to finally get control of it's borders and all the illegal immigrant problems and drug running that comes with it.
I for one am glad somebody is finally standing up to these fucking Canadians. GSP should be expecting a crane kick any day now i would suspect.
shitbag- October 14, 2011 at 12:29 pm
I hate this fucktard. I fucking hate this stupid fucking fucktard!
FilmDrunk- October 14, 2011 at 12:17 pm
Steven Seagal will control the border by lending it his control-top briefs.