(Don’t get used to it, buddy. By the way, those aren’t real tats — he’s wearing one of those queer-ass tattoo shirts. )

With his MMA debut coming in four days, you might be wondering what Jose Canseco has been doing to prepare for Hong Man Choi. After all, we’ve seen no photos or videos of him training at MMA camps, and he’s ignored every interview request from MMA news outlets (us included). It’s all a big mystery. Well, it seems like the real answer is the most logical one:

As the story goes, Canseco recently asked Trigg for some 11th-hour help, but Trigg turned him down. Said Twinkle Toes: "Other MMA guys are saying, ‘Don’t associate yourself with the guy.’ Besides, Hong Man Choi is going to rip his [expletive] head off."

Let’s take a moment to ponder that very legitimate possibility. Jose Canseco is trying to parlay an 0-1-1 celebrity boxing record into success as a mixed martial artist, with zero MMA training to speak of. On the spectrum of "things a former pro athlete can do to generate income," I’ll admit that fighting Hong Man Choi is a slightly better idea than robbing a hotel room. But it’s still a terrible idea, in that Canseco could wind up seriously injured, and few people outside of hardcore MMA fans are even aware that this fight is taking place. Talk about poor brand management. I guess this is what happens when nobody wants to pay you for your autograph anymore.