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James Irvin Hits Absolute Rock Bottom, Signs With XARM


(BowCap: It’s “armbar” in tard-speak. / Video courtesy of Hamwin12)

From injuries and freak accidents to painkiller addiction and steroid busts, James Irvin‘s MMA career has been a litany of bad luck compounded by bad decisions. And his latest decision could be his worst yet. According to a new MMAJunkie report, Irvin is in talks with XARM — best known as the dumbest combat sport in the history of human stupidity — and may be participating at the full-contact arm-wrestling promotion’s June 24th event in San Jacinto, California.

Irvin won a pair of fights for Gladiator Challenge earlier this year, both by first-round stoppage. In fact, the Sandman hasn’t seen the second round of a fight in five-and-a-half years, making him an ideal fit for XARM’s “Roughest 3 Minutes In Sports” mentality. But there’s no way he’s getting out of this thing unscathed. It’s James Irvin, for God’s sake. Shattering his wrist or orbital bone would be a best-case scenario. Something freaky is going to happen, I just know it. Damn. Am I going to have to watch this fucking thing now?

XARM’s next event will be filled out by the participants of an upcoming reality show that will air on the Machinima network, in which XARM hopefuls are put through a three-day training boot camp. The promotion is still looking to fill nine spots for the show, and is accepting fighters ranging from 145 to 265 pounds, including female fighters. If this sounds like a good use of your time, hit up Tedd Williams at teddewilliams@aol.com. Please, no point-fighters or game-planners.

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linzhanbs- May 3, 2012 at 8:39 am
http://tinyurl.com/goodb4biz
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El Guapo- May 2, 2012 at 2:28 pm
Bob Sapp was born to XARM!
dranokills- May 2, 2012 at 1:11 pm
"Clemmie- May 2, 2012 at 6:55 am

I think this might be my chance for a big break. Like my version of TUF. Can I start a fundraising campaign for the CP readers to send me to this?

Hmmmmm. I think we have a precedent set for that don’t we, Karma?"

You know we really would like to help but we just don't loan money to lame and retarded. as in you are lame and xarm is retarded. face it dude, you will NEVER even be on a level playing field with karma.
IronClad- May 2, 2012 at 11:11 am
so many levels of shitty
shitbag- May 2, 2012 at 9:47 am
X-Arm is run by a guy with an aol email address?! That's fucking hilarious.
ArmFarmer- May 2, 2012 at 9:43 am
meant "at what point".. edit button?? Please???
ArmFarmer- May 2, 2012 at 9:42 am
At one point do they actually arm wrestle by the way? It doesn't seem like that aspect is incorporated at all. It's just two guys tied together hitting each other...
ArmFarmer- May 2, 2012 at 8:37 am
Yeah, this still exists? I would have thought the funding would have run out.. ya know.. the next day.
Kintamachikara- May 2, 2012 at 8:33 am
What the hell kind of network is "Machinenema"?
Is this similar to fuckingmachines.com?
Fried Taco- May 2, 2012 at 7:45 am
Does Cyborg's suspension prevent her from competing in this? If not, someone forward her that guy's email address!
knucklesamitch- May 2, 2012 at 7:01 am
This is still a thing? Seriously?
Clemmie- May 2, 2012 at 6:55 am
I think this might be my chance for a big break. Like my version of TUF. Can I start a fundraising campaign for the CP readers to send me to this?

Hmmmmm. I think we have a precedent set for that don't we, Karma?
Sloppyspray- May 2, 2012 at 6:38 am
The fact that this dude has an AOL e-mail account means that this is totally legit.
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