(“We’re thinking about home-schooling them.”)
Twins, in other words. From venerable gossip site PerezHilton:
Double The Baby Joy!
As PerezHilton.com was the first to exclusively confirm, Jenna Jameson and boyfriend Tito Ortiz are expecting their first child. Well, now, sources reveal exclusively to PerezHilton.com that the blonde beauty is having twins!
“They’re having twins,” a friend of the superstar tells us. “Jenna and Tito just found out. They are beyond thrilled!”
The happy couple just bought a new — much bigger home — for their growing family in the beach near Los Angeles, sources tell us.
Congrats to the happy couple!!!
Perez’s enthusiasm seemed to come as a shock to his readers, who were perhaps expecting him to illustrate the article with penises crudely drawn on an ultrasound photo. Some sample comments…
rondonna: “This site is a fucking joke anymore. Why would we congratulate this pig and her loser husband. That poor kid, oh, my mom was a porn star, Poor thing.”
PooPooButt: “Hope they both die, what a horrible existance it would be to have that fucked off whore as a mother.”
BritneyBitch: “What the fuck is up with Perez supporting a true whore and hating on a young teen girls who are not even whore…yet he calls them sluts? Must be really hard being a fat man who takes cock in the ass.”
And so on. Feel free to suggest names for the double-bundles of joy in the comments section. If they’re boys, I’m thinking “Team” and “Punishment,” and if they’re girls, maybe “Punishment” and “Athletics.”
(Props: “Old, Bald & Irish”)