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Jose Canseco Explains Why We Have Wars

(Give Cofield credit, he isn’t afraid to just put it out there and say, ‘Why are you doing this?’ in the tone of a man trying to talk some sense into his alcoholic cousin.)

Sometimes I wonder if Jose Canseco is one of the dumbest former pro athletes out there, or if he is so brilliant that he merely seems dumb to those of us who can’t fully grasp the depth of his wisdom. Listening to the guy explain why we have wars and how those wars are just the large scale version of the petty criticism we perpetrate against one another on a daily basis, I could feel my mind slowing being blown into millions of tiny pieces. Then he said that Herschel Walker’s insistence on not fighting him was a “negotiating ploy,” and I was forced to completely disregard my theory of Canseco as an unappreciated genius.

You see, unlike Canseco, Walker is not desperate for cash and attention. The guy donated his Strikeforce payday to a church. Typically, guys who are fighting for charity do not engage in negotiating ploys to drive their price tag up. If they wanted their charity to have more money, they’d just give it to them personally. If they didn’t have that kind of money to give, they probably wouldn’t be fighting for charity.

Is any of this getting through, Jose? Are you even still reading? You became distracted by a dog with a puffy tail midway through the first paragraph, didn’t you? You know what, just forget it. You keep after Herschel Walker. After all, you’ve been doing this longer than him.

Cagepotato Comments

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bobroode- November 9, 2011 at 6:01 am
Canseco was my favorite player growing up, but he needs to stick to baseball. He is way to big and bulky to be a good fighter. Also check out desks for bedrooms if you need something new for your home or office.
ReX13- February 25, 2010 at 7:02 am
I don't see Canseco and Walker as analogous; Walker has had an abiding interest in martial arts for years, and shows a great deal of respect for the sport. He is an MMA fan who happens to be a famous athlete, and when he says he may have competed if the UFC had existed when he was younger, i tend to believe him. Caseco, on the other hand, seems to think that he can hit really hard because he's a big guy, and that equates to "knockout power" without regard for things like "technique". He also seems to have forgotten what it's like getting hit, or doesn't realize that things that happen in Japan aren't occurring in an alternate universe that English-speakers aren't privy to. We saw you tapping out, Canseco, and you looked like a bitch.
That said, i really have no problem with this match going down. I assume that Jose would get worked, and i can get behind that.
Lastly, one point about Walker's doanting his fight purse to charity: yes, his purse was pretty small--officially. I would bet that Coker made a significant donation to the same charity as part of their deal. Walker is one of the few NFL retirees that doesn't need dough; it makes railing against his participation in MMA that much harder.
Harry Peepshow- February 25, 2010 at 6:50 am
I am sure there are alot more credible fairy tales he could have donated his money to
Canseco_MMA- February 24, 2010 at 8:46 am
@Smitty: I think you have a very valid point. And, I about pissed my pants at the "Why are you doing this?"....Steve Cofield totally needed to drop that bomb....
That Guy- February 24, 2010 at 8:45 am
OK wasn't Walker's purse $600 for that fight? Not that it's nothing but can we stop giving him credit donating his whole payday to a church already? It's not like he gave away Tim-Sylvia-fighting-for-Affliction cheddar
Charming Charlie- February 23, 2010 at 10:24 pm
"And you know what, why not do it? Two guys that are willing to train, for three months, go out there and show their ability, why not do it?"
EvilScott- February 23, 2010 at 7:52 pm
Seriously, more Jose Canseco "news"? This is exactly what he wants. You're helping him perpetuate himself and shaming MMA.

Until he's actually signed to fight and not just making noise, who cares? Enact a Tito-Ban on him.
LargeMidget- February 23, 2010 at 7:38 pm
Just another example of why everybody hates Jose Canseco.
MMAExpertNewb- February 23, 2010 at 5:59 pm
You better stop criticizing him Cagepotato. You’re going to start a war…
MyFightWiffaCheeto- February 23, 2010 at 5:46 pm
The best part of this whole article is the Simpsons reference.

"This man is my exact twin..."

Great Job Ben(s)
failingev0lution- February 23, 2010 at 5:43 pm
"I was a professional athlete; the best baseball player in the world at one point."

WOW, way to be humble. Also, wtf is with the Gracie name dropping?

"I'm working with the Gracie family...he may be a little more experienced than me, hopefully I can get that experience training with the Gracie family...I'd be willing to train with the Gracie family for three months..." (yes, three whole months of BJJ traiing!)
Then at the end?
"I would love to train with the Gracie family and hopefully they will have me."

Lying has-been POS, go home.
mthomas- February 23, 2010 at 5:35 pm
Whoah, fighting another "human being"? As opposed to say, fighting an elephant? If he "just wants to compete" and try the sport, why not fight as an amateur or in the SF Challenger series or somewhere less visible? Oh right, because you're an attention whore and a joke in the world of pro sports....I forgot.
mthomas- February 23, 2010 at 5:05 pm
The Top 5 Douchebags in MMA:
1.Jerry Millen
2.Jose Canseco
3.$kala, PLAYA!
4.M-1 Global
Randy Pan- February 23, 2010 at 4:36 pm
It would be easier to enjoy this Canseco side-show if the Man Choi fight didn't reveal that Canseco is a total quitter who will tap immediately if the fight doesn't go his way. To me, this means that we will never get to see Canseco truly get his ass kicked, which will inevitably happen every time he fights a real opponent.

If this idiot gets to fight in Strikeforce, they'll probably feed him some awful can to make Canseco seem credible. Even Walker would crush him.

I agree with you that people should care less about a fighters' ages and more about their abilities. The issue with Canseco and Walker, at least my issue with them, isn't that they're old, but that they are given far too much attention for being totally superfluous to the sport. Some of this attention is good for the sport as sheer publicity, for sure, but it Hollywood-izes the sport and turns it ino a freak show. These dudes can barely fight, and Walker gets on the main card simply because of his celebrity. These "celebrity" fighters can only exist in the sport if they're spoon-fed beatable opponents. It's lame.
Smitty- February 23, 2010 at 4:14 pm
I don't get it, Dana is always talking about how this sport will be the biggest, most popular sport in the world. Doesn't that include popular with people over 40. Why would anyone think that this wouldn't be appealing to try for people 40 and over. I think it's a package deal. You can't say "this will be the biggest sport in the world", and then not expect older people to want to try their hand at it. There have always been people boxing well into their 40's. Randy is proof that it can be done in MMA. Now, not everyone over 40 is gonna be competitive enough to fight in the UFC, but I'm sure there are some that can "handle" it and be successful.