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K.J. Noons vs. Ryan Couture, Roger Gracie vs. Anthony Smith Added to Strikeforce’s Coda

(Jeez, I haven’t seen such poor fight choreography since Sonny Corleone went to town on that punk Carlo for beating on his kid sister.) 

If our past few posts are any indication, it doesn’t really matter what the subject of this article is, because you Taters will inevitably turn the comment section into a discussion on a feller who goes by dipsetkilla, whether he fucked your mom or not, and how gay you would be based on whether he fucked your mom or not. Personally, I think we should have dipset and bootystar (remember him?) engage in a winner-takes-all battle of incoherent superiority. Then again, dipset is probably hitching up his trousers and throwing a five dollar bill on my mother’s nightstand as we speak, so clearly I have a dog in this fight. Maybe I just miss bootystar and such whimsical gems as: “I bet the gladiator got asked cuz he was caught starring at the pork barrel sausage in the littereen next to his bald headed one yed jack of pades” but I digress.

Aaannnyyway…a pair of bouts have been added to Strikeforce’s stacked (LOL!) final card that will feature Luke Rockhold vs. Mr. Glass, Daniel Cormier vs. some dude, Josh Barnett vs. Imhotep, and Whoshisface vs. Whatshisname. We don’t mean to over-hype these fights, but needless to say, they will forever change your definition of the word “Superfight.”

First up, an interesting clash at lightweight between rising star Ryan Couture and falling star K.J. Noons. Currently 5-1 under the Strikeforce banner, not Randy Couture will be looking to end his SF career with four straight wins against the struggling Noons, who has dropped three of his last four in the promotion including a near death-by-wrestlefucking at the hands of Josh Thompson in his last appearance.

In other news, Roger Gracie will be looking to build on his recent victory over Keith Jardine at Strikeforce:Rockhold vs. Kennedy when he takes on Anthony “Lionheart” Smith, who recently submitted Lumumba Sayers via triangle choke at Strikeforce: Rousey vs. Kaufman to improve his SF record to 2-1.

Random fact: If Mike Kyle can make it to his fight with Gegard Mousasi this time, he will have competed on the very first and very last Strikeforce MMA cards. Cover your eyes, Gegard, because some thumbs will be comin’ your way if history is any indication.

Alright, now that we’ve got past all that boring MMA stuff, can we please get back to where the hell CAPSLOCKHAL and Xeno have been?

-J. Jones

Cagepotato Comments

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dipsetkilla316- November 30, 2012 at 7:55 pm
Im sure she dose
Canseco_MMA- November 30, 2012 at 1:31 pm
Also, my mom likes fat loads so that wAS thoughtful of you.
Canseco_MMA- November 30, 2012 at 1:28 pm
Dipset, I wish I had a time I could go back in time and bang your grandma(when she was hot), and then give your mother money for an abortion.
luvs and kisses ;)
dipsetkilla316- November 30, 2012 at 12:23 pm
Gayseco mma all u do is talk shit ur the biggiest retarted ive ever seen. I swear u really are, nothing smart to say like usual. Also bro ur so not funny nothing funny to say either ur comments r useless. No one cares wat u have to say, becouse they all no, deep down inside, that ur mentally ill. Ps dont worry christmas came early for ur mom to i got her a special gift ;-) yep thats right u guessed it, i busted a fat load all over her face, also mad some mouth babys with her
dipsetkilla316- November 30, 2012 at 12:15 pm
Agreed ryan is a pretty cool dud. His submission game is really good, and so is his ground and pound. His ground is sick just like randy. Guess the apple dosent fall far from the tree.
KarmaAteMyCat- November 30, 2012 at 12:02 pm
Couture is the man. Kids a beast.
Alan K- November 30, 2012 at 8:47 am
The Couture-Noons fight is at lightweight. My apologies for saying something about the article. Continue your discussion about fornication with each other's respective mothers.
Canseco_MMA- November 30, 2012 at 7:05 am
It's awesome that dipset is so fuckin retarded that they chose to add his name in the article. I'm saving this page forever. Christmas came early for me. Like dipsets mother and sister did. I bite my thumb at you sir.
dipsetkilla316- November 30, 2012 at 6:22 am
Great article by the way
dipsetkilla316- November 30, 2012 at 6:22 am
I'm sorry the subject of the second part of my sentence was your mom.
dipsetkilla316- November 30, 2012 at 6:20 am
Canseco is so gay, me, and about 20 otherman gangbanged her, we mad her gag, we took turns cuming on her face. There was a thick layer of cum on ur moms face is wat im trying to say.
Canseco_MMA- November 30, 2012 at 5:15 am
Great article by the way.
Canseco_MMA- November 30, 2012 at 5:13 am
Dipset is so gay. I banged his mom.
macreadysshack- November 29, 2012 at 9:31 pm
That Bootystar quote is downright lyrical. In tiny doses, metered out by professionals, even the worst trolls can be de-clawed. I'm just going to wait this one out. They all go away eventually but it takes a lot longer if you FEED them. The only appropriate response is no response. When folks here START out article postings by addressing the troll - it's like calling Tito out of retirement. It's like if Jon Jones called Tito out of retirement.
Smokestack- November 29, 2012 at 9:11 pm
I drink a shot of Jager every time I hear about Strikeforce dying and how "stacked" this final card.
Smokestack- November 30, 2012 at 9:40 am
Fried Taco- November 29, 2012 at 3:05 pm
Every time a bell rings, it's time to get your prostate checked.