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15 Moments of Instant Regret [GIFs]

Keith Jardine Needs to Fire His Agent


(Right. You tweak your nipples, but *that’s* weird.)

If Keith Jardine is trying to use MMA as a springboard to an acting career, I ain’t mad at him. But making ultra-short cameos in awful-looking movies is a strange way to go about it. As IMDb informs us, Jardine’s first make-believe role was as "Jay Boy Simpson" in a cringeworthy Toby Keith vehicle called Beer for my Horses. (If you can find a clip of the Dean of Mean’s scene, please let us know.) Then, he continued his assault on Hollywood with a seven-second appearance in Crank: High Voltage, which we’ve posted above. It probably would have been better for his personal brand if Statham said "Never better, UFC fighter Keith Jardine. Now where can I buy that eye-catching t-shirt?" But you take what you can get, I suppose.

Anyway, if you thought those roles were impressive, just wait until you see Keith firing a machine gun for half-a-second in the trailer for Gamer



EMBED-Gamer Movie Trailer – Watch more free videos
(Props: ScreenJunkies)

So, Gamer is a about a dystopian future where people can control other people (for real) in ultra-violent virtual-reality MMORPGs, and one of the players (Gerard Butler of 300) decides he’s had enough and goes after the game’s evil creator, played by Michael C. Hall, of Six Feet Under/Dexter fame, doing an embarassingly bad southern accent. Don’t blink at the 1:46-1:47 mark or you’ll miss Jardine’s big moment. You know what they say about how there’s no small roles, just small actors? Not true, it turns out.

By the way, Jardine isn’t even listed on the IMDb cast page for this one, though Milo Ventimiglia is, as a character named, I shit you not, Rick Rape. Not to confused with his more easygoing brother, Rick Roll

Previously: FML Alert: ‘Dean of Mean’ Is the 82nd-Ugliest Man in the World

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KcCarnage- May 15, 2009 at 3:12 pm
GAMER looks pretty cool
Kadumel- May 13, 2009 at 7:02 pm
Fuck you The Real Kadumel. I am the original, dont worry about my I.P address send me your home address and we can work this shit out.
Big Shafty- May 12, 2009 at 9:07 pm
Jardine is also in the trailer at the 1:15 mark for about 1/3 of a second. I have better eyes than you.
Komodo- May 12, 2009 at 8:39 pm
Haven't seen any of those Crank flicks. Jardine gets an automatic pass though for the MEAN shirt :D
Mdollas- May 12, 2009 at 6:19 pm
so they took that shitty movie death race or whatever and made the exact same movie minus the cars?
BeastUnleashed- May 12, 2009 at 6:14 pm
LOL. I noticed Jardine when I saw Crank and was like WTF is he doing in there.

Saw him in the Gamer trailer. I hope its for more then half a second in the whole movie.
PingPong- May 12, 2009 at 6:09 pm
Cant' believe I am saying this but Luda's really slumming it in this one...
WuTangClan- May 12, 2009 at 5:57 pm
Get a life Kadumel, no one gives a fuck if thats you or not.
ImaAssSpankMe- May 12, 2009 at 3:02 pm
Meh, I liked the first Crank a lot. It's seriously one of my favorite movies. Pure fun. I haven't seen the second one yet, but I'll admit, the previews looked pretty awful.

As far as the Gamer movie goes, I'll probably watch it just for the actors involved. Honestly, action flicks don't have to be even remotely good for you to get your money's worth. Just blow shit up to a good sound track and I'll be happy. And considering Gamer is pretty much a direct rip off of The Running Man and Death Race and probably another four or five movies I've never seen, it's not like you can even complain about the premise. It's not their fault it worked before.

I think I could do with more of Keith's mug randomly thrown in movies. If I had a face that recognizable, I'd paste myself everywhere just for the fuck of it. He doesn't need more than five seconds. People see his face and are at least gonna ask the people around them if they knew who the fuck that crazy looking dude was.
NECROPHYTE- May 12, 2009 at 2:01 pm
Exactly! Why the hell would anybody want to be named Kadumel also!!!!!
TheRealKadumel- May 12, 2009 at 1:34 pm
Man I wish I could find that guys IP address... Hint hint... I would sure love to be able to find his IP address and strike down upon thee with great vengance.
NECROPHYTE- May 12, 2009 at 1:22 pm
Maybe Jardine doesn't anticipate being a UFC title contender ever again and wants to focus on acting as a career alternative. Don't hate on the man for trying to get laid, 28th ugliest man? That's just mean, Dean of Mean!!
NECROPHYTE- May 12, 2009 at 1:19 pm
Kadumel has a multiple personality disorder?
Kadumel- May 12, 2009 at 1:12 pm
who has been here longer me or you?
Kadumel- May 12, 2009 at 1:11 pm
Fuck you I am the real Kadumel, no one gives a shit about the forums asshole.
Fucklord- May 12, 2009 at 1:07 pm
crank 2 was an awesome movie you blog ass motherfucker
My Fight Wiffa Cheeto- May 12, 2009 at 1:07 pm
Jardine needs to fire both his agents... how is still getting paid 20-25K to show?

Jardine would fight an army of midgets for the UFC if asked.
Curtis_E_Bare- May 12, 2009 at 12:57 pm
I liked it better when it was called The Running Man.
Wyatt- May 12, 2009 at 12:54 pm
anyone else suddenly wish the writer's strike was still going?
hlebtastic- May 12, 2009 at 12:53 pm
Man, I am a little tired of people who haven't seen the crank movies saying they are bad. I went to see the first one in theatres exceptionally drunk expecting it to be terrible, but it was legitimately awesome. The second one I got even more drunk and I was laughing and yelling throughout the whole thing. Seriously Bens, just watch them. You can thank me later.
T Rex- May 12, 2009 at 12:48 pm
Both movies are by the same Writer/Director team. Maybe they're both Keith Jardine fans?
TheRealKadumel- May 12, 2009 at 12:40 pm
Ben when you going to ban the IP that took my name and bestow it back to the rightful owner : )

Let me know I am still waiting. Check the forum if you don't believe this is me.
modogg- May 12, 2009 at 12:39 pm
I DVR'd that Beer for my horses movie awhile ago just to see Keith in it. I am not web-savvy enough to find it, but it is in the first 20-30 minutes of the movie. I don't believe he has a speaking part, but he plays the role of the local big guy with a big truck or something. And that movie is just an awful, awful movie
Richard Tucker- May 12, 2009 at 12:35 pm
Is it too late to change my screen name to "Rick Rape"?
Myles Kilometers- May 12, 2009 at 12:33 pm
That film was retardedly entertaining.

And really there's nothing funnier than hearing strangers around you whisper "Dean of Mean" to their less educated friends.
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