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Ken Shamrock Scores Much-Needed Victory Over Jonathan Ivey

(Ivey scoffs at your ironic tattoos, hipster.

By CagePotato contributor Seth "Lysol" Falvo

Let’s pretend you were in Lafayette, Louisiana last night. Let’s also pretend that you were not at a bar that was showing UFC 120. Odds are that you, like me, were at City Bar at some point. Odds also are that you knew that Ken Shamrock was in town to fight Johnathan Ivey, a 29-42 fighter who has lost to everyone he’s fought that you’ve actually heard of. Fortunately, having a friend who works at the Cajun Dome means not having to sit through it to know how it ends. Unfortunately, writing an article about the fight means actually watching it on Youtube.

Let’s start by pointing out the obvious: Ken Shamrock, as evident by his leg kick submission to Pedro Rizzo in his last outing, is doing just enough to get paid anymore. And I can’t say I blame him. Fighting to pay court fees for your old boss is slightly more motivating than “Because my ex-wife’s boyfriend needs money for an engagement ring” and slightly less motivating than “Because the Cajuns aren’t in town this weekend”. Furthermore, Shamrock weighed in at only 209 pounds for his fight against Ivey. Draw your own conclusions.

As for the actual fight, you missed even less than you thought you did. In a fight that never went to the ground, Ivey managed to hang right with Shamrock, even knocking him down at the end of the second round. Granted, Shamrock wasn’t exactly trying to finish Ivey, but still. However, Ivey was poked in the eye in the third round and never fully recovered, allowing Shamrock to take the unanimous decision victory.

You could almost compare this fight to Cro Cop vs. Pat Barry, in that both fights were essentially sparring sessions with slightly disinterested legends winning against younger opponents. Of course, that comparison is still somewhat unfair. As unmotivated as Cro Cop has looked recently, he would still kick Shamrock’s head into orbit. And if Johnathan Ivey attacked Pat Barry in his sleep, Barry wouldn’t even need to wake up to knock him out.

If, for whatever reason, you want to watch the first round, there’s a video here, where the poster of the video mistakenly refers to Ivey as Butterbean.

You can follow Seth on Twitter here.

Cagepotato Comments

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2DaDeath- October 19, 2010 at 1:43 am
Regardless of how many losses he's had, you gotta admire Ivey for how many fights he's been in. Plus, there are a lot of guys out there, like Fedor,who pride themselves a little too much about their records. But then there's a guy like Ivey, who just loves to fight, no matter what the outcome. That's what being a badass is all about!
djp1988- October 18, 2010 at 5:33 pm
Paul Wall let himself go.
Ballkick- October 18, 2010 at 4:54 pm
Unbeknownst to many Jabba the Hut Fans
Jabba fell on hard times after the Star Wars years.
Pictured above Jabba fell in with a bad crowd, got some Tattoo's, Gold teeth, and failed miserably at a Career at MMA.
He is currently auditioning for a spot on "The Biggest Loser"
agentsmith- October 18, 2010 at 3:59 pm
So is this guy gonna die now too?

Seriously, think about it... Ross Clifton was the last guy Shamrock beat, and he died not long after. The last guy Ken beat before that was Kimo Leopoldo way back in 2004, who recently may or may not have temporarily or partially died. I sense a curse... if you lose to Ken Shamrock, you die of shame.

Fun Fact: Ken's last win before Kimo was some can named Sam Adkins, whose record was 5-11 at the time (7-20-2 now). His last win before that was Alexander "The Diet Butcher" Otsuka, with a record of 1-4 (now 4-13). No word on their current health status.

So since the turn of the millennium, Ken's record now stands at 5-9, and only one of those wins was over an opponent with a winning record. Good times!
Ballkick- October 18, 2010 at 2:55 pm
God I wish Ken wold get enough money to go to Guatemala and help the poor starving children, you remember that Potato Nation?
I wonder how much of the 175K he has left to pay off to Zuffa?

Fuck Ken! the Children in South America need to be fed the word of your Lord and saviour.
That will fill their distended bellies,.... a heaping spoonful of Jesus......and Anabolic Steroids. That'll fatten them up.
Is it possible.........? Ken might have just said that to look compassionate and caring,....
I really don't think he gives two shits about god or the grotty little wankers in Guatemala.

Hey Ken,....Fuck you,.. you fucking Fuck.
Mr_Misanthropy- October 18, 2010 at 2:37 pm
That dude looks like somebody made all of those tattoos on him in one night while he was passed out drunk. It's like one day he was sitting around drinking PBR and eatin' chicken fangers and the next day he woke up all X-treme and dangerous. Somebody rolled him in a fresh hot pile of War Machine in the middle of the night.
PingPong- October 18, 2010 at 2:02 pm
I think the nobody tat is just there so he can point to it when some asks; "Who are you dating?"
Merlin- October 18, 2010 at 1:36 pm
that 'Nobody" tat is perfect!

Ken Shamrock IS THE NEW Travis Fulton
ReX13- October 18, 2010 at 1:28 pm
Maybe we shouldn't be poo-pooing this one, fellas. Johnathan Ivey has beaten Joe Nameth. TWICE.

That's right. In your face, bishes.
Kid Clam Curtains- October 18, 2010 at 1:11 pm
knucklesamitch- October 18, 2010 at 1:03 pm
Ivey has a KO over Joe Nameth...That's eff'd up. Oh wait, I was thinking of Joe NAMATH
Lysol- October 18, 2010 at 12:53 pm
My God does this website suck anymore.
Dagnut- October 18, 2010 at 12:53 pm
Thats how to take the piss, good piece
cecils_pupils- October 18, 2010 at 12:52 pm
This, BTW, is my favorite past Cage Potato comment from Seth "Lysol" Falvo:

Doesn't it seem like every comment now is a failed attempt at Comment of the Week?
cecils_pupils- October 18, 2010 at 12:46 pm
Having a grenade tatt is so fucking cool. It's like sayin' "I fuckin' wreck everything I touch, man".

In that case, I'm gonna get a grenade tattoo'd on my dickhead.
MoTropolis- October 18, 2010 at 12:43 pm

Thats actually the logo for soft serve ice cream, pretty similar to the superman logo, understandable mistake.

I think that guy fixed the toilet at my shop last winter.
djp1988- October 18, 2010 at 12:40 pm
How the fuck is Muay Thai explicit content?
El Famous Burrito- October 18, 2010 at 12:22 pm
What's with that Superman tattoo on his right arm?

It looks all fucked up.
ReX13- October 18, 2010 at 12:22 pm
Good piece, imparting news we want (Shamrock is still fighting, but not well) in the style to which we (the bastard children of the Potato Nation) have become accustomed. acustommed? ackustomed? It's what we're used to.

PingPong- October 18, 2010 at 12:17 pm
"Those are some of the ugliest, goofiest tattoos I've ever seen."

Which is too bad because otherwise he looks like a perfect gentleman.

El Famous Burrito- October 18, 2010 at 12:16 pm
If we could dig up a story about Alan Belcher we'd have the Crappy Tattoo Trifecta.
Fried Taco- October 18, 2010 at 12:16 pm
Looks like the old Ken is back!! War Shamrock!!!!
Prometheus- October 18, 2010 at 12:14 pm
Those are some of the ugliest, goofiest tattoos I've ever seen.