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Lucky/Brave S.O.B. Subdues Armed Robber at Gas Station Via Triangle Choke [VIDEO]

Philadelphia News, Weather and Sports from WTXF FOX 29

Props to R/MMA for passing along the wildest bit of gas station footage since Maiquel Falcao slapped that girl and got KO’d with a 2×4. Early Saturday morning in Norwood, PA, a 20-year-old local kid named CJ Gostynski decided to throw on a mask and rob a gas station at gunpoint. Unfortunately, he ran into a tough/brave/crazy son-of-a-bitch named John McGowan, who had just lost his car and was in no mood for the bullshit.

When Gostynski demands money, McGowan tells him “You’re fuckin’ with the wrong guy,” and proceeds to walk up on the would-be robber, who is pointing a gun directly at his face. [Ed. note: This is the point where I would be fishing my wallet out of my urine soaked slacks.] McGowan tackles Gostynski — “right into the racka potata chips,” says the regionally-accented news anchor — and locks him down with a triangle choke. McGowan then proceeds to beat Gostynski with his own gun (!) and holds him in place until the cops arrive. Renzo would be proud. The Gracie Brothers are masturbating furiously.

During the fracas, the gun went off twice, and McGowan’s shoe was grazed with a bullet. Gostynski, who has no criminal history, is facing 33 charges including robbery and assault. As MyFoxPhilly reports, an AR-15 rifle with 60 rounds of ammunition was found in Gostynski’s truck, but honestly, everything’s an AR-15 these days. Anyway, kudos to John McGowan, whose balls are way, way bigger than ours.

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