Damn, $kala. That tattoo is street.)
If you’re like me, you often sit and think about things like, Who’s the REAL Boss, Tony or Angela? I mean, sure Angela paid Tony to cook and clean her house, but she never really had the authority that Tony wielded. I don’t recall her ever reprimanding Sam once throughout the series, yet Tony always sent Jonathan to his room and gave him lectures about stuff like ditching school and getting into mischief with his friends. Sure, Angela would talk to Sam about puberty and boys, but she was more of a friend.
I finally found our answer.
Judging by the tracks below, Jared may have actually been better as an MMA analyst than he is an MC. Have a listen and you be the judge if he has skills, or if he’s likely to be hitting the unemployment line if and when his career goes kaboom.
My Main Girl
Well, it seems J-Shaw is a bit of a playboy with an appetite for sex, liquor, drugs and cheesy rhymes.
Here’s a snippet of the Whitmanesque prose from the joint he’s hoping will be the club hit of the summer:
Please take a seat next to me,
I’ll show you how hot sex can be,
Take the door to one,
Now times that by three,
Maybe four, maybe more,
Undress you from head to toe,
Pour out a little vino,
Smoke a little weed though,
We in the moment, might as well be stoned,
Strike opponents out like Zito,
New Jack City, in my world, she’s Nino,
On the streets of Hollywood, she’s amused to the freakshow,
Moment like this can happen in an instant,
You’re resistant, but I’m persistent,
All highlights in your hair, gold-tinted,
Reasons to love, I can name a million,
Say hello, we start rappin’,
Hello to the minglin’, so long to the mackin’
Look out Jay-Z. There’s a new sheriff in town.
Heart on a Plate is an introspective jam about why $kala is so unlucky in love. Could it be because you carry an accessory dog like Paris Hilton and spend more on shoes than you did on Seth Petruzelli? Just a guess.
Check out this little slice of poetic genius:
She spent hours alone now,
I’m out with the in crowd,
She don’t believe me when I text, “I’m home now,”
But she’ll be leavin’ before I’m seein’,
That destiny’s the reason for our meeting,
What’s the meaning?
Why can’t I seem to keep ‘em?
If this is love, I seem afraid to believe ‘em,
I just keep askin’ for the same reason,
If this is love, how could you leave me?
I’d drop a tear, but I can’t seem to cry,
My eyes shut down, my heart pounds inside,
I’m alive, I’m free, but I don’t feel like me,
Drinkin’ vodka straight with a blunt to the face,
If by, "blunt," you mean hammer, I feel you, G.
Listening to these three tracks as well as the other four that he has up on his ReverbNation page, a pattern becomes evident" Jared is extremely depressed, smokes way too much weed and drinks too much. I guess he really did take Kimbo’s loss to Seth harder than everyone thought.
Take a look at these uplifting feel-good words from the 410′s newest rap sensation:
I can’t see the sunshine, sun don’t shine when I’m outside,
When I’m alone I cry, alone inside, alone I lay, alone I fly, alone I’ll die,
So cold to be alone that I know I’m a lonely guy,
Yeah, yeah, I remember the day, I remember it way back,
You climbed in the back of my made back,
Drive it out front so we can lay back,
We exchanged rap over Kanye tracks,