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Must-See: “BJ Penn Is…The DOUCHEBAG”


The brilliant video-remixer/voice-mimic responsible for the Tito Ortiz music video in the #1 spot of today’s Worst Commentary Moments list dropped us a line this afternoon to let us know that his latest work has just been posted to YouTube. (Good lookin’ out, Chaplin!) "The Douchebag" makes fun of everything that BJ Penn can possibly be made fun of for, including (but not limited to) his lazy training habits, his mother fighting his legal battles for him, his failed appeal to The Rock for a movie role, and how his former jiu-jitsu teacher hates him now. Plus, we learn that when BJ’s voice is slowed down, he sounds basically retarded. (Coincidentally, Jeff Goldblum suffers from the same condition.) Chaplin also has a couple of non-MMA-related videos that you also need to check out. If you can make it through this voice-dubbed scene from last season’s Celebrity Apprentice without pissing yourself laughing…well, good for you. Must be nice having dry pants.

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Dang- April 1, 2009 at 10:45 pm
Made my day... hope Kenny kciks his douchebag ass
Anonymous- April 1, 2009 at 2:15 pm
i just hope BJ sees that
Baki_hanma- April 1, 2009 at 3:29 am
who was the guy that said fuck bj hes a traitor?
GetUpAndKill- April 1, 2009 at 2:16 am
Bad bad video..I git the point but somebody has to do better than that...

Otherwise, everyone chill the fuck out. Everyone will get their chance to be first so just be patient and wait, when the time comes you will also be stuck for words and in a panic write something retarted like "first bitches".

And Your Fucking Father...what did BJ's BJJ do for him against GSP...?

Nilch when it meant the most. Good for BJ's BJJ career success...maybe he should concentrate on grappling only from here on in.

He beat a midget a year ago...

BJ...what have you done for me lately? Special thanks to Janet Jackson.
degree- March 31, 2009 at 11:49 pm
i think the real douche is the one that wasted the time and effort to make this vid.
asspiss- March 31, 2009 at 9:36 pm
Both of you are a bunch of clowns. We are all here to talk about the sport of MMA, that we dearly love. BJ is a killer at 155 and his JJ is sick witty like P. Diddy. GSP is the Lil Wayne of the octo. Best fighter alive. Hallulejah holla back.
Your Fucking Father- March 31, 2009 at 8:17 pm

a. I was trying to make a fucking point loser.
b . your a fanboy with no life and just go to MMA websites to talk shit and try to start arguments.

I am going to go with B on this one asshole.
Anthony- March 31, 2009 at 7:04 pm
If you feel the need to explain that you train 5 days a week then you are either A) lying or B) an antisocial assface
billy- March 31, 2009 at 6:37 pm
Ralph Gracie called him a traitor because he fought Renzo. Watch Legacy, it has the whole ordeal. And Ralph was hurt because BJ was his best student but he outgrew his teachings.
Your Fucking Father- March 31, 2009 at 6:32 pm

I am not going to get into an internet argument with you about this because its stupid. I was simply pointing out that his argument that GSP's JJ was better than BJ's was a weak argument at best, I dont have a favorite fighter I am a fan of a lot of fighters but MMA first. I know thats hard for you GSP fanboys to understand, its easy to sit here and talk shit about a fighter from your moms basement. I train five days a week and I can respect the hard work that goes into all fighters fights even amateurs. As for me being anti-social I am not even going to go there with you because thats all you want you dont know me and I can assure you I have friends, a job and am well adjusted to society, but thanks for your concern. Now please go jump in front of a truck, not because you tried to argue with me but because you probably changed your name from Eric to Maxwell because you have no response to my argument. By the way name calling doesnt equal winning an argument. Douche.
ftg314- March 31, 2009 at 6:26 pm
Behind the goofyness of the video, the footage and quotes are real. There's a lot of content in there.

Notably, when the man who taught you Jiu-Jitsu says you're a "traitor", it tells you all you need to know about BJ.

And wow, talk about all those forced laughs from Penn's crew.

This is case closed. The verdict is in. BJ is a douchebag.
NoLoveForBJ- March 31, 2009 at 6:24 pm
i'm beginning to feel sorry for this scumbag, hopefully after Kenflo beats the living crap out of him he will retire quietly and we will never have to make fun of him no more.
maxwell- March 31, 2009 at 6:07 pm
telling people to kill themselves because they dissed the skills of your favourite mma fighter = hilarious.
now i'm gonna reccomend you kill yourself, because you're a nut-hugging antisocial assface, not because you're defending a douchebag.
Your Fucking Father- March 31, 2009 at 5:39 pm

I dont want to get into an internet war here because I am sure you can type tougher words than me but if you think GSP's JJ is better than BJ's then you sir are a complete fucking moron and you should do the world a favor and play chicken with a semi. You're talking about a guy who was awarded his black belt in just three years, it takes most people 9 or more. He also was the first non brazilian to win the World Jiu Jitsu Championships. To say GSP who has accomplished nothing in the Jiu Jitsu world and has recieved belts from a lesser caliber teacher is better than BJ in JJ is absolutely moronic.
Indestruktible- March 31, 2009 at 5:03 pm
Why did Ralph Gracie say BJ was a traitor? What did BJ do?
Chaplin- March 31, 2009 at 4:54 pm
Thanks Ben! Appreciate the excellent write up too :)
Warcraft- March 31, 2009 at 4:48 pm
That was fucking awesome.
I liked BJ until this whole BS geasegate crap. GSP vs Penn 3 if BJ is man enough but probly not The Douchebag for sure.

Even GSP said it was the voodoo kiss from the long haired hippie that made BJ lose the fight. No grease just BJ lack of Cardio IMO.
I hope he does another episode after Ken-Flo takes his belt.
matthewj- March 31, 2009 at 4:44 pm
It's funny douchebag - try not to take these things so seriously
Maud- March 31, 2009 at 3:45 pm
And there goes everyone of BJ's PR campaigns in one fell swoop. That song was a little catchy though.
BitchJ Penn- March 31, 2009 at 2:33 pm
LMAO thats right Kim C is a... Theres nothing you can do it about so go fuck your hat. I've asked for a registration for months now and since obviously the Ben's don't care too much about they're (see what I did there...)board they aint gonna do shit about it So I love seeing you little bitches whine and complain like a little girl who just got her period for the first time. Fuck you and everyone who looks like you, You little ho!
Anonymous- March 31, 2009 at 2:30 pm
Couldn't even watch all of this. I'm not a fan of BJ but this was incredibly dumb.
Hard to believe someone spent the time to make this.
billy- March 31, 2009 at 2:29 pm
I know mma is a what-have-you-done-for-me-lately sport. I get it, he just lost so he was never any good, and his previous opponents were just not as skilled as they are today.
My Fight Wiffa Cheeto- March 31, 2009 at 2:26 pm
My pants are dry.
Anonymous- March 31, 2009 at 2:24 pm
i just wanna know how this guy "chaplin" got that picture of my friends and i in that hotel room....?
Eric- March 31, 2009 at 2:23 pm
billy: gsp has, that's who. so what if he's bigger. his skillset is better in every area (yes, jj too) because he's more dedicated. establish guard from side control?? is that how you win fights? he's flexible as fuck, so what. so is my girlfriend. and all this talk about gsp being so much naturally bigger. bj has fought in LWH with his fatass. do u think gsp could do that? hell no. bj is highly skilled in jj but let's see him win a world championship now. now that everyone and their mamma is training. gsp exposed every weakness he has (and there are many). he's a great fighter, but his time has passed. jabbing sherk when sherk had his hands down like an idiot doesn't impress me. demolishing joe daddy doesn't impress me at all (one dimensional fighter). his resume is longer than that but that was then. it's a different game now