(I think we all know what the young male audience was tuning in to see: Randy Couture's brilliant and intoxicating smile. Props: MMA TKO)

Spike TV is a lot like those jerks who you play in a fantasy football league with.  There’s always one sure way to know when they did better than you, and it’s by checking your email inbox.  Spike sent out another email today touting the triumph of UFC 105 over Strikeforce on CBS, at least among a few key demographics.  According to Spike, UFC 105 drew an average of 2.9 million viewers on Saturday, which is considerably less than the 4.04 million that Strikeforce averaged.  UFC 105 peaked with 3.7 million viewers during the main event, whereas Strikeforce had 5.46 million watching Brett Rogers get his head knocked off. 

But just because they technically lost the overall ratings battle to a network TV event (which is expected), doesn’t mean they can’t hype their own numbers in the young male demographic that the UFC and Spike TV collectively own.  Just check out this handy breakdown they provided:

(Enjoy your long winter breaks, boys.  Try to lay off the Christmas chocolates.)

According to Dan Wetzel of Yahoo! Sports, the UFC is spreading the word that May 1 will bring the much-anticipated and very necessary rematch between UFC light heavyweight champ Lyoto Machida and Mauricio "Shogun" Rua in Montreal.  That also happens to be May Day, so maybe Machida and Rua will celebrate by leading their fellow UFC workers in a bloody revolution against the bourgeoisie oppressors in the Zuffa front office.  More likely though, they'll just fight each other for a whole lot of money in front of a packed audience of Quebecois.  

Sure, May is kind of a long time to wait for this rematch, and by then we may have forgotten how heated we were about the controversy surrounding the decision, but after going five hard rounds these guys need some time off before they begin another training camp.  Plus, if the UFC waits long enough, maybe the light heavyweight division will sort itself out and an obvious challenger will appear.  Or maybe by then "Rampage" Jackson will be filming an "A-Team" sequel, Rashad Evans will have joined the cast of "The Real World," and Tito Ortiz will be directing porn movies under the name Rod Poundington.  The way the UFC's luck has been lately, it's not really that far-fetched. 

WEC 44 is just a few hours from now, and as we already told you once, the Mike Brown-Jose Aldo title fight promises to be a war that you do not want to miss.  Ever since Brown shocked the world against Urijah Faber, we've all had our chance to see what kind of tools that particular contractor is using to build his foundation, but what about Aldo?  You may not be completely familiar with the 23-year-old Brazilian, but the good news is that it won't take you long to get caught up.  In his last three WEC fights, he's spent a grand total of 6:02 in the cage, winning all three via TKO.  Add in introductions and a couple of rewinds to fully appreciate his explosive finishes, and you can see it all in around seven minutes. 

Take the time to enjoy the man's body of work, won't you?  He'd do the same for you, or at least he would if you did anything aside from reading the internet and playing those damn video games.

Aldo vs. Mickle, and a very low-fi version of Aldo vs. Perez are both after the jump.

(He feared no man.  Canadian doctors?  Well, that's a different story. Photo courtesy of Fight Magazine)

Free health care might work just fine for most Canadians.  If Georges St. Pierre discovers a bizarre rash after his post-fight debauchery or Alanis Morissette decides to pop out a kid, it's no problem.  But their system of caring for the sick and injured without driving them into bankruptcy just isn't up to dealing with the big problems of a big man, particularly not when that big man is as much of a red-blooded American as Brock Lesnar.  According to what Lesnar's chiropractor, Larry Novotny, told a local news affiliate in Alexandria, Minn., Lesnar's current health problems really started heading downhill while vacationing in Canada, the land of free medicine and wonderfully polite death panels.  I think you know who he's going to blame.

Said Novotny: "His symptoms became severe while in Canada, which because of their health care system, made it difficult to manage.  At this point it's a possibility that it could jeopardize his career." 

Okay, Novotny.  Fair enough.  But you're forgetting to mention that it didn't cost him a penny.  Still a good deal for the money, no?

(Just relax, breathe deeply, and picture everyone in their underwear.)

It’s been a tough couple of years for Karo Parisyan.  The Armenian-born judoka who once famously declared himself “too talented to train,” has been sidelined for the last nine months due to a suspension resulting from his use of painkillers prior to his split decision win (subsequently changed to a no contest) against Dong Hyun Kim at UFC 94.  Before that, he pulled out of UFC 88 the night before the weigh-ins with a back injury aggravated by panic attacks, and that was after his TKO loss to Thiago Alves.  What I’m saying here is, the man’s been going through some trials and tribulations.

Now he returns at UFC 106 to take on submission specialist/supernerd Dustin Hazelett and the question remains, what’s the deal with Karo?  Is he still a UFC caliber fighter, or just a guy with an inflated sense of self who might fly off the handle and demand to know whether you’re aware of who he is?  According to what Parisyan told UFC.com, he realizes that he hasn’t been about much lately, and that’s because his most difficult struggle is just being trapped inside his own head:

“I’m not making any excuses for my last few fights, but anxiety played a huge role in me not being properly prepared. Anxiety takes over your life. I have it under control now, but imagine having anxiety all night and not being able to sleep because you’re worrying about every little thing. How are you going to be able to train and fight when you’re dealing with something like that?”