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Non-Committal Commitment of the Day: Glover Teixeira Will “Probably” Get the Winner of Jones/Gustafsson With an Impressive Win

(One of these men is on the brink of a world title shot. The other plans on penis-smacking himself in Mexico. You tell us which promotion helps build stars. Photo via Esther Lin/MMAFighting.)

Dave Chappelle once pondered what it would be like to be so famous that you could get your dick sucked and the person that sucked your dick would in turn also become famous. Someone who can probably relate to that level of power is UFC President Dana White. While he has yet to make anyone famous for giving him a hummer (besides Arianny, of course. *self five*), all White has to do is merely allude to a newsworthy piece of information and every MMA blog in the world jumps on it like it’s the word of God. I’m not the only one who sees the similarities there, right? Also, does anyone else see these fuckin’ iguanas on my coffee table?

Take this recent tidbit, for instance, which UFC executive Marshall Zelaznik dropped during the UFC 163 post-fight press conference:

Dana [White] and Joe [Silva] have confirmed, with a strong victory by Glover, then he probably gets the winner of the Jon Jones fight. Glover’s got an opportunity to go for that belt with a big win, so we’re expecting big things in Belo Horizonte. 

As you would expect, MMA blogs across the board are jumping all over this statement and claiming that “a title shot is now on the line” for Glover Teixeira. Those of us who are at all familiar with Dana White, however, know that when he throws around the wordsprobably” and the phrase “with a strong victory,” he means “unless a more lucrative option becomes available.”

While Teixeira would be as good a man as any to face the Jones/Gustafsson winner, he’s also not that well known by the average MMA fan. His victory over Rampage Jackson was a good start, sure, and if he is able to put away Ryan Bader (who is quickly becoming the light heavyweight division’s go-to stepping stone) impressively in their “Fight Night 28″ headlining scrap, then he should have gathered enough momentum for a title shot. But with all the talk both surrounding and between Jon Jones and Daniel Cormier, you think the UFC isn’t going to jump on that opportunity should it become a realistic possibility?

This is all dependent on how Teixeira and Cormier perform against Bader and Roy Nelson, respectively. Unless you honestly think that Jones is going to lose to Gustafsson, in which case you are probably nuttier than those people who thought Chris Weidman was going to

-J. Jones

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AlanJDixon- August 12, 2013 at 10:12 am
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teep- August 6, 2013 at 2:24 pm
I love Danny Glover on Community too, but are you trying to say that Rhonda Rousey isn't as famous as Arianny?
Fried Taco- August 6, 2013 at 2:16 pm
Troy and Abed in the morning!