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Nothing To See Here: No Ortiz Announcement at Today’s Presser, Says Affliction’s Atencio

(‘So I put on my good jeans for nothing then?’)

Affliction VP Tom Atencio tells Fighters Only the organization won’t be announcing the signing of Tito Ortiz at today’s press conference after all.  With Ortiz on the shelf recovering from back surgery Atencio says they’re not even discussing contract specifics yet, despite reports to the contrary.  Could it be that even Atencio has his doubts about Affliction being around long enough for Ortiz to fight for them?

Updated: He’s an announcer for the event.  Happy now?  Me neither.

If there’s no Tito signing, that leaves Affliction with a problem at today’s presser.  There’s going to be no Fedor, since he’s decided to stay in the gym following his sambo loss.  There’s no big news, now that the big fights are all announced.  It’s nothing but a photo op, and “Pretty Boy” Lindland is probably going to wander into all the pictures anyway so even that aspect of it is a waste.  

Hardly the kind of thing they need to drum up interest in January’s card, which will air opposite a rebroadcast of UFC 91 on Spike.  Apparently Dana White has downgraded the Affliction threat from ‘emergency Fight Night needed’ to ‘reruns will kill it’ status – ouch.  

Our advice on how to handle this press conference: make stuff up.  Worry about making it come true later.  

Just saying, what if the Iron Sheik was a guest referee in the main event?  What if Josh Barnett was reassigned to a pro wrestling match against Don Frye, while Aleksander Emelianenko stepped in to face Gilbert Yvel?  What if both Aleks and Gilbert were given blood tests before and after the fight, just to see how the results differed?  What if the loser of the Vitor Belfort-Matt Lindland fight actually had the design for the Affliction “River Styx” tee (only $56!) tatted on his torso in front of a live audience?  People can say they won’t watch that show, but they some lying bastards.


Cagepotato Comments

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KG- December 18, 2008 at 9:19 am
Yeah every guy who says hi to you and drinks shots with you is a COOL and NICE GUY for sure... LOL

Get off of the douches ballsack, he is old news and looks like an oompa loompa
Goog- December 18, 2008 at 4:43 am
Yeah. There's nothing cooler than a guy at the table next to you at a bar saying hi to everyone and drinking shots. You know... I recall running into the coolest guy ever last weekend at the local pub. Nobel prize winner, if I'm not mistaken.
Anonymous- December 18, 2008 at 1:19 am
I've met Tito before, and he is cool as shit. He had a table at Tryst in Vegas next to us, was saying hi to everyone and drinking shots with us...

Plain and simple, COOL and NICE guy...really down to earth

So F off all you internet losers sitting here with nothing better to do then hate.

Get a life, just cause Tito has one dont be jealous!

tyler- December 18, 2008 at 1:14 am
KG keep your foot out of your hole!
KG- December 17, 2008 at 11:44 pm
Hahah Tito get off of this site and quit banging on those sperm infested keys of yours.

And the only reason Teet-O would even be remotely CLOSE to a Rolls Phantom is because Jenna fucked 3 billion guys... pretty funny the reason he is living large is because of what went in her hole, and what is about to come out of it
tyler- December 17, 2008 at 9:34 pm
Tito Ortiz is the greatest star in the history of mixed martial arts. That's why there are so many haters jealousy is a common trait in all people.
don bogart- December 17, 2008 at 8:32 pm
tito rolled up with jenna and his manger i a sick white rolls royce phantom on 22's . this photo isnt of today he was wearing a pimped out blue suit . stop hating this guy can smash all you haters
Anonymous...Ooops I Mean Enormous Cock In Your Mouth- December 17, 2008 at 6:51 pm
Dude you are so fucking gay...

Jack be nimble
Jack be quick
Jack jumped over the candlestick

But Jack wasn't nimble
And Jack wasn't quick
Jacked ended up with a french fried dick...
Anonymous- December 17, 2008 at 5:56 pm
"Nothing To See Here" really? thats why you have a report update about it..
STFU to all of yall that hate on Tito. If nobody gave a fuck about him why would you waste your time even reading this, leavin mad comments.. I really dont get it, can sumone tell me why is this? I mean I cant stand Brock but I dont break my neck to be the 1st hater to post my BS comment about him, I really dont give two fucks about what Brocks doing next, cuz he sux imo.. But really guys let me know
Clozer- December 17, 2008 at 4:35 pm
Tito should get the shirt. I would still let that over the hill whore chop me up. Just don't show me the big headed baby belly please!
Kissenger- December 17, 2008 at 4:27 pm
He's not out, he's just not doing promo stuff so that he can train more.
James- December 17, 2008 at 3:41 pm
As any one else a little confused by this "There’s going to be no Fedor, since he’s decided to stay in the gym following his sambo loss."

WTF, since when is Fedor out of DoR?
Kissenger- December 17, 2008 at 3:28 pm
Hey Tito. Knock, knock.

-Who's there?

Fuck off!
KG- December 17, 2008 at 2:31 pm
That chicks tits are awesome.

Oh and fuck off Tito, go ride a motorcycle without a helmet
Eveboy420- December 17, 2008 at 2:26 pm
LMAO at OB&I, Gotta agree give em the shirt!
mayhem420- December 17, 2008 at 12:49 pm
Regarding Tito.... who gives a crap? Just fade away already.... PLEASE!

OBI - Best comment I have seen in some time.... BOTH of them!!

@CP: Dude HOW can you now NOT give OBI a shirt for those?
Come on the guy even brought up some childhood stuff that most people keep down inside untill they die... or untill they hit the retard during gym class in the face with a doge ball.
jdavis- December 17, 2008 at 12:16 pm
Maybe Affliction is signing Jenna for the event? She could do a big pregnant striptease before the Fedor fight and Todd Beard could rush down a threaten to punch her then Tito could come in and clear the ring only Babalu would slip in behind him while he is celebrating and hit him in his surgically repaired back, setting up a grudge match between the two of them at Affliction 3.
Old, Bald and Irish- December 17, 2008 at 12:02 pm
@ C-Bus Allstar

Thanks. You are a gentleman and a scholar.

@ Kadumel

Dude, I know you just jinxed me and I'll never get that f'ing shirt.

Thanks, Kadumel. I know exactly how this is gonna work out now. It's gonna be just like 1st thru 8th grade at St. Ephrem's Catholic School. Every week for 8 years we had a Penmanship Award. Every week I tried my best to win that award. Every single kid in my class of 40+ students won that award at least once.

Except me.

Out of 336 attempts, I still never got that award. Even the retarded kid got the freakin' award!

But it's not like I carry this shame around with me and daily visit that dark place of failure in my soul. Oh no. Of course not.

Hmmm...come to think of it, my handwritting does really suck.
The Biz- December 17, 2008 at 11:52 am
I do like the old cougar in the picture though...very dirty!!!
The Biz- December 17, 2008 at 11:52 am
Seriously...were you really expecting a Tito announcement today? Seriously???
Goog- December 17, 2008 at 11:50 am
The headline "Nothing to see here..." pretty much sums up Tito Ortiz completely. Douchebag.
Kadumel- December 17, 2008 at 11:43 am
Some people just seem like they try for the comment of the week.

In other news, how sweet would it be to be Tito for real. I bet dude gets the best head in the world from different girls while Jenna watches all the time.
C-Bus Allstar- December 17, 2008 at 11:33 am
Easily comment of the week. Easily. Well done OBI.
Old, Bald and Irish- December 17, 2008 at 11:24 am
@ weatherman2012

No such luck. Tito is NEVER going away.

Some people, say like Bas Rutten, have this thing that Tito doesn't have that allows them to stick around, transition to new organizations and ventures and we'll welcome them with open arms.

What's it called again?

Oh yeah...


...and Tito has none.

All this "Affliction: DEATHWATCH (TM)" is making me nuts. Ya know when you see something horrible happen, like a car crash, and everything is in slow motion? That's what following Affliction is like. Except, you've already seen the crash and you can't peel your eyes away from the slo-mo sight of the mangled girls body ejecting through the front windshield as her $95 Affliction t-shirt gets sheared away from her skinless naked body as it sloooooowly rips on the broken glass while her pulverized bloody carcass gets forcefully expelled from the flaming vehicle.

Kinda like that...

...except Fedor is standing there on a street corner witnessing the whole thing with an emotionless expression on his face and an ice cream cone in each hand.
Creamy CA Roll- December 17, 2008 at 11:22 am
How is it possible that in this pic Jenna is the classiest of the bunch?