(Jon Jones doesn’t know what to tell you. Sometimes you eat the bear and, well, sometimes you get disqualified for hitting him with illegal elbows. Photo courtesy of Combat Lifestyle’s after-party set.)

A bizarre night in Las Vegas brought the latest heavyweight experiment of “The Ultimate Fighter” to an end, and not a moment too soon. Now we break down the results to see who’s up and who’s down according to the patent-pending technology of the Potato Index’s arbitrary numerical rankings.

Roy Nelson +87
We get it, his physique is unimpressive. But a KO win showed he can fight on the feet and on the mat. Funny that Burger King doesn’t seem more pleased with a free endorsement from an athlete who’s known for his unappealing body.

Brendan Schaub -21
As we’ve seen in the past, losing in the TUF Finale isn’t any more a condemnation than winning is a guarantee of future success. Once he gets some experience under his belt, he could turn out to be an exciting fighter to watch. Why not give him Kimbo next, just for fun?

Matt Hamill -64
If ever there was a victory that was more crushing to the winner, I can’t recall it. He got absolutely dominated by Jones. There are very few positives for Hamill to focus on at this point. He should think of that win bonus as found money, because he sure didn’t earn it.

Jon Jones +29
It goes down as a loss on his record, but we all know what we saw. Jones showed off some of that freakish ability we’ve heard so much about, and only a mental lapse cost him the full measure of his glory. We’d love to see him get right back in there with another big fight soon.

Kimbo Slice +17
At the end of the day, he won, thus giving the UFC a reason to keep him around. That’s good news, even if he narrowly beat a smaller fighter who had already demonstrated that he wasn’t UFC caliber. Hopefully his next fight will be against someone already on the roster, and maybe even in his own weight class.

Houston Alexander -42
Who told Alexander that circling compulsively was the way to win this fight? It was a horrible game plan as well as a boring one to watch. Something tells me it didn’t make the UFC realize what a mistake they’d made in letting him go the first time.

Frankie Edgar +55
Every time I see Edgar in action, I can’t help but think what a great featherweight he could be. He’s too small for 155, but it’s no surprise that he doesn’t want to take a pay cut in the WEC. Just one more reason for the UFC to absorb the organization’s little guys.

Matt Veach -7
He fought hard and held up better than many thought he would against Edgar. Still, this showed that he’s not quite at the elite level, which is dangerous in an organization with so many excellent lightweights.

James McSweeney +41
He looked far more comfortable and confident than he did in most of his TUF performances. His cardio held up and his striking looked sharp. Some holes still need to be closed up, but that was a great start.

Darrill Schoonover -17
You hate to see a guy go off to serve his country on a loss, but Schoonover seems like a guy with real potential if he comes back and gets with a good camp. Be careful out there, Schoon.

Matt Mitrione +19
One good punch saves him from being another Dave Kaplan, but for how long? He didn’t look terribly impressive, and he’s got the personality of a chaise lounge.

Marcus Jones -12
It hurts to see a kind-hearted giant like “Big Baby” lose a fight he seemed on course to win. Clearly, his stand-up needs work and he’s no spring chicken. All the same, we’d love to see him get another shot in the Octagon.

TUF 11 coaches +3
So…Tito and Chuck again, huh?  At least it doesn’t take a belt out of circulation, and it allows two aging former stars to get back in the limelight without damaging their already battered brains by putting them against some hungry young stud.  I guess we can’t complain about that, but once the season starts and Tito begins speaking, we may very well experience a change of heart.