(You look sleepy, Gabe. Maybe time to grab a quick nap? Photo courtesy of UFC.com)
Who’s up and who’s down? The Potato Index is here to tell you with our post-event wrap-up of arbitrary numerical rankings.
“Rampage” Jackson +121
He won a fight he was supposed to win, even if it took him 2 2/3 rounds longer than many thought it would. Jackson said he needed the work, and he looked good from start to finish. But will he still be glad he went through rounds when he has to get back in the gym and prepare for Rashad Evans in two weeks?
Keith Jardine -15
“The Dean of Mean” fought hard and, if nothing else, proved his chin isn’t so suspect after all. The guy has a lot of heart and he’ll fight anyone (except his Jackson camp buddies). There’s always a place in the UFC for someone like that.
Shane Carwin +154
Didn’t we tell you this guy was a beast? Gonzaga broke his nose in the opening seconds and it barely slowed Carwin down. The knockout blow didn’t even seem like it had all his power behind it, but it didn’t matter. Another first-round KO, and this time against a notable opponent. This guy is headed for big things.
Gabriel Gonzaga -78
He’s quickly becoming the guy who can give hell to the lower-tier fighters and absolutely no one else. He needs a victory over someone who matters, and fast.
Matt Brown +83
Somehow he managed to seem both vicious and merciful in his bizarre fight with Pete Sell. Brown doesn’t want to keep beating on you, but he will if Yves Lavigne makes him.
Pete Sell -32
You can’t say he’s a quitter. You also can’t say that performance helped him any. Just be glad Lavigne’s indecision didn’t get him seriously injured.
Matt Hamill +90
He can outwrestle most good strikers and now looks like he can outstrike good wrestlers. We’re almost ready to believe that his loss to Rich Franklin really was friendship-related. Almost.
Mark Munoz -48
Welcome to the UFC. Now keep your hands up.
Gray Maynard +97
You don’t have to like him, but at least admit that “The Bully” is no joke. He turned into a boxer and battered a very tough opponent like it was an easy sparring session. Still doesn’t finish fights, but doesn’t lose them either.
Jim Miller -40
No one looked as surprised as Miller when it became clear that Maynard wanted to keep it standing. Surprise soon turned to dismay, then to swollen and bloody. Looks like it’s back to Fight Nights.
Kendall Grove +53
It’s always nice to win a must-win, and in definitive fashion. It will keep him hanging around, but for how long?
Jason Day -51
A willingness to fight anyone, anytime is nice, but not if you don’t win some of them.
Tamdan McCrory +42
How can you not like “The Barn Cat”? He needed that win, even if he didn’t get the entrance music he wanted, and he just seems so damn likable. Hope he’s around for a long time.
Brandon Vera +45
Looked like shades of his old self as he leg-kicked the hell out of Patt. Can he do it against someone who matters? His next fight should answer that. Maybe it will even be on the main card.
Referees -189
Yves Lavigne is usually better than that, so we’re willing to believe it was just an off night. That Rick Fike character has earned no such leeway. Aren’t we at the point where we can demand qualified, experienced professionals no matter where the event is?
Main Event Musical Chairs -137
After announcing Mir/Lesnar prematurely, the UFC plays dumb until they’re forced to admit it’s off and then asks Rampage to fight for the third time in four months or else they’ll give it to Machida. Now we’re determining title fights by asking who can get ready on short notice? Bad idea.
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Comments
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:36
Barncat might start to make waves. He surprised me as well.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:36
Carwin surprised me....he is a beast...knocked out standing and coming back for more.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:40
I was surprised about the size difference between Rashad and Page. Shad has some big shoulders and a bit of size advantage. Pumped for this fight. Shad will win mos def.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:40
Nippletweak - 120
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:40
Gray Maynard should fight Clay Guida. The style math up would be interesting.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:42
My boy Jason Day never quit his day job as a house framer, he's a humble guy that will take the loss hard, really hard. But he will come back. He looked good against Grove, good gameplan and good energy. Unfortunately that Hawaiin mutant's arms reach a foot farther than Day thought.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:42
I'm just gonna keep babbling till someone else writes....I hate Pete Sell and the Serra camp. Serra's never tap....but Serra's should tap.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:43
The Barn Cat is the new hero of Nerd Nation with his videogame reference and slapping on the specs for the Rogaine interview...
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:43
Rashad - 180 Teammates shouldn't color commentate for obvious biased reasons.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:43
Jardine's chin is no longer suspect.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:44
Did you know that if you kill a nuisance squirrel that potentially 2-3 more squirrels will move into the old squirrels habitat? The lesson here is that unless Rampage fights Evans May 23rd he will have way more of an uphill battle to get his belt back.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:44
Bad reffing can ruin a card, but at least we got some cool catch phrases like, "What the Fike!?!" and "Two men enter, one man Yves." out of the deal.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:45
Did you know that Rampage has an Albino kid?
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:47
Carwin for UFC Heavyweight Champion!
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:48
The UFC needs to get Vince from the Shamwow commercials to pitch title fights to guys: Ok Rampage, if you act now, and call your manager in the next 20 minutes, because we can't do this all day, we'll send you to Vegas to fight Rashad Evans for the title. And as a bonus we'll throw in a fight at UFC 99, becuase we all know the Germans need good fights, you can even use the Shamwow to wipe down those greasy Jackson fighters. You'll be saying wow every time.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:49
@ Justin Shut up Justin. You're gay.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:50
BARNCAT wanted to use the THUNDERHORSE song. He immediately became one of my favorite fighters.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:52
Matt Brown is awesome....wasn't that dude gonna retire before TUF? That guy has killer instinct and Pualo Thiago should take notes.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:53
@ Dave W Nipple tweak is actually +139. Carwin is in the vaseltweaker camp.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:55
Kendall Grove post-fight Celebration - 80 If you're gonna be a dickhead of a sore loser, at least be original. Copying a retard like Ortiz makes you an even bigger retard. I hope Grove gets his ass kicked next time.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 10:58
@ Batman Yeah the dude can celebrate when he can peice 2-3 wins together. What a DB. Fuck BJ was annoying in the corner. Can you imagine a Serra camp vs. Penn camp fight? I would seriously consider sucking an exhaust pipe.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:01
@ young hairy Taking canon ball sized fists to the face, getting knocked out standing and coming back to KO a silverback gorrila faster than Randy Couture isn't impressive?
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:02
shane carwin didnt look impressive at all! that was pure luck
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:03
Did you know that elephants go to a mysterious elephant graveyard drawn by a mysterious force? The lesson here is that the UFC Heavyweight division is really messed up. I think a Royal Rumble style heavyweight bout might be the only way to truly judge who is the king of all divisions.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:09
Carwin got lucky. Don't think it will happen again. Gonzaga was doing his thing right until he got KTFO.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:12
It's hard not to feel bad for Rampage. First they ask him to coach TUF and he has to take a half a year off, now they want him to fight every other weekend after a mental collapse. And if he doesn't want such a short lay-off he has to wait. Not saying Machida doesn't deserve a shot, but the lightweight title shouldn't be affected by injuries in another weight class. I guess you have to take the good with the bad as a MMA fighter though. Also yes, Guida vs. Maynard would be a cool matchup.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:13
Did you know that the universe is growing towards complexity? The complexity theory is that the universe started out with a big bang of simple yet infinite matter that blossomed out into ever increasingly complexed systems of light, energy matter and other space stuff. The human complexity is that humans have thumbs to build shit. Shit like spaceships...and to break shit, like peoples faces. It is our destiny to become an advanced race and to kill the earth in the process, only in all probability to be crushed by an even more advanced and complexed system. One day we will find other human like creatures that have noses on their arms and we will find them ugly and they will find us ugly. The point here is that Rashad won't stay on top much longer. Sure he will beat Rampage but Lyoto has complexed magic. His complexity is more advanced than Rashads and Lyoto will briefly rule the universe (briefly being in relation to the millions and billions of years of the Universe's existence). You're welcome.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:19
I meant sore winner
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:21
Page / Shad [almost] makeout session - 112 It looked like they were playing kissing chicken up there. (Who can get closest to frenching without actually locking lips?) Zuffa production crew +198 Any camera angle other than the one directely between the almost-kissing pair would have led the world to believe that they were indeed trying to submit each other's tonsils.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:23
Carwin got lucky, he was getting dominated until that moment. Rampage did not look great at all, if he continues to fight like that he won't get through Rashad. And I really want to watch Lyoto humiliate Page and then end his humiliation with a trip to lala land.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:30
lyoto is unstoppable. he's only getting better too. he's gonna reign the division for a very long time.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:31
I agree with the consensus that Carwin was lucky after being rolled around. I wouldn't call it impressive. He snuck a punch in and it worked. And so it goes in the heavyweight division. Win or lose, I still like Gonzaga for whatever reason. He just always seems to have a very real chance of knocking someone into next month.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:33
I gotta shit.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:44
Suck it, you doubting bitches
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:45
Part of the problem with the officiating is that the UFC lets the local commission's referees do the undercard fights. It's done partially as a "thank you" for deciding to regulate the sport, especially in states that have regulated it more recently. It's kind of a necessary evil and about the only way for the newer refs to get experience doing big time fights. That being said, some of the mistakes are inexcusable.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:47
How the fuck did Carwin get lucky? (That's it, that got me posting) Did Gonzaga trip and fall? Did he go blind? Carwin got nailed by a punch that would have absolutely dropped 95% of fighters and then took another one. That's lucky? Carwin didn't let GG finish him (when he TOTALLY should have), got up, and connected, which I'm sure is part of his training. It's not luck, it's called being able to take a punch. You could almost see GG's thought bubble going "WTF?!?!?" Then he got overconfident and got dropped. (By a punch not near as hard as the one Carwin got hit with.) So please someone calmly and logically explain what is luck about that.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 11:59
That is a load of shit for rampage, the dude needs a breather, specially since Rashad isn't a joke. Machida deserves a shot, but not this way.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 12:05
So this "lucky punch" bullshit... Are you serious? Was he throwing a kick and landed with a fist instead? Was closing his eyes and throwing blindly? Was he aiming for the body and somehow hit the head? He threw a punch, the punch landed on the target. The target leads to a stunned opponent. He finished. Sure sounds like luck to me. Would you use that same logic against Rampage's KO on Chuck or Silva? Or Gonzaga's head kick on Cro-Cop? I guess The Hammer's head kick was lucky too?
Mon, 03/09/09 - 12:10
And it doesn't matter if you were doing all the right things before you got knocked out. That KO means you fucked up and the other fighter got the better of you and your chin. It's not like hockey where you get a point if you tie before OT or SO. An 'L' still means you didn't win. Not all punches instantly daze or KO someone. It's the good ones.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 12:24
It's so obvious. He got punched by a punch.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 12:28
So Koschecks loss a few weeks ago was not luck either, correct?
Mon, 03/09/09 - 12:37
Carwin got lucky??? Took a haymaker, on his back, stood up and a clean, crisp right to the chin... Takes more than luck to stand up with Gonzaga in your guard.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 12:38
Let's put it this way... he's lucky that one landed. Some of you guys talk like every punch is deliberate, perfect, and effective. How about the notion that they're on the defense at the same time, throw alot of punches in the general direction of the head, and a few of them connect.... if they're not blocked or obstructed by the other three hands also flying in the same small area. If a punch can be that dialed in, why would they bother throwing more than one? They throw as fast and hard as they can. Some graze, some connect, some hit the shoulder... whatever. But you can't say that in the middle of Shane Carwin getting his ass kicked that he just simply decided to stand up and say "I'm tired of getting hit in the face. I'm ending it right now with THIS punch. He started swinging back and got through. And he's lucky he did before getting pummeled any more. Now I know this is the wrong example because of the Lesnar haters, but it's a perfect example of the difference: Lesnar coming out and knocking Heath Herring back in time with the first shot was not lucky. He wasn't fighting off an attack. He wasn't on the defense. It was a first strike, perfectly placed. Nothing lucky about it. If he'd been getting beat down and thrown that during a flurry, it would have been considered lucky by most people here.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 01:03
A "lucky punch" is thrown out there with a hopeful target. When you throw and aim at a noggin like Gonzagas there is no luck to it. It has to be powerful and brutal!!! Carwin is the hero of the week. Get over it haters.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 01:07
Carwin vs. Lesnar!!
Mon, 03/09/09 - 01:19
Umm, Matt brown looked great so he should be higher and same with Brandon vera
Mon, 03/09/09 - 01:19
A punch lands or doesn't there's no luck in that just talent! YOU BEOTCHES BETTER RECKOGNIZE!
Mon, 03/09/09 - 02:23
Carwin was lucky. Luckily he fought a guy with a glass jaw. Props to him for keeping his wits about him after getting pummeled by Gabe, but lets be realistic here. Any other heavyweight would have knocked out Gonzaga with that punch, the guy has no chin. Other than that one punch (yeah, yeah that's all you need) he was getting dominated.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 03:19
i wouldnt say it was a lucky punch . but ill just say " i am not impressed with his performance"... a lot of holes in his game but he is 11-0. and what the hell i get off work and theres like 2 pages of shit to look at...
Mon, 03/09/09 - 03:27
CanadianProduces life stock -250 enough posts already -Carwin rules
Mon, 03/09/09 - 03:43
To all you guys claiming Carwin got a "lucky punch." Take some time to think more about this sport. Why do you think a fighter wins a fight? Is it because one fighter is better than the other? Because one fighter made a big mistake? Because one fighter fought better than the other on a particular night? I think any of these are legitimate ways to win a fight. And I think Carwin won because he capitalized on a big mistake on Gonzaga's part. When someone wins by submission is it because they got lucky or because the other fighter made a mistake? Are all submissions lucky? Are all one-punch knockouts lucky, or do they happen because one fighter made a mistake and left himself wide open? Carwin's win was not lucky, he took advantage of Gonzaga leaving himself open and won the fight. Feel free to try to prove me wrong.
Mon, 03/09/09 - 06:02
Okay fucko, I see most of you are using the: "Matt Serra, 'it wasnt lucky!!' defense" What Matt Serra says here is "I tried to hit him and I did, therefore it wasn't lucky." "If you try to hit a punching bag, and you hit it, was that a lucky punch?" I see what hes saying. Apparently if you have the intent to do something and you do it it's not luck. So, by the same logic... last week I was in the gym and I threw a basketball across half court and happened to make it in the basket. But i suppose that wasn't luck, because I was TRYING to throw it in the basket. Right?
Mon, 03/09/09 - 07:00
so carwin got lucky 11 times in a row in the 1st round?
Tue, 03/10/09 - 08:10
Did you know that some species of mammals breast-feed their young well into adolescence? The lesson here is some people (candadianproduce) should make their post and GTFO, stop hanging around like a one night stand that stays for breakfast.
Tue, 03/10/09 - 09:08
One time I was playing at the ol' slot machines, and I put fifty cents in, and BOOM I won 11 dollars. Is that luck? I don't think so. I put the money in and wanted to win, therefore it was all skill. It's what I wanted to do
Tue, 03/10/09 - 12:03
mahahahahahah i love u produce, your writings are keeping me very entertained while i am at work pretending to work
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