(You look sleepy, Gabe. Maybe time to grab a quick nap? Photo courtesy of UFC.com)
Who’s up and who’s down? The Potato Index is here to tell you with our post-event wrap-up of arbitrary numerical rankings.
“Rampage” Jackson +121
He won a fight he was supposed to win, even if it took him 2 2/3 rounds longer than many thought it would. Jackson said he needed the work, and he looked good from start to finish. But will he still be glad he went through rounds when he has to get back in the gym and prepare for Rashad Evans in two weeks?
Keith Jardine -15
“The Dean of Mean” fought hard and, if nothing else, proved his chin isn’t so suspect after all. The guy has a lot of heart and he’ll fight anyone (except his Jackson camp buddies). There’s always a place in the UFC for someone like that.
Shane Carwin +154
Didn’t we tell you this guy was a beast? Gonzaga broke his nose in the opening seconds and it barely slowed Carwin down. The knockout blow didn’t even seem like it had all his power behind it, but it didn’t matter. Another first-round KO, and this time against a notable opponent. This guy is headed for big things.
Gabriel Gonzaga -78
He’s quickly becoming the guy who can give hell to the lower-tier fighters and absolutely no one else. He needs a victory over someone who matters, and fast.
Matt Brown +83
Somehow he managed to seem both vicious and merciful in his bizarre fight with Pete Sell. Brown doesn’t want to keep beating on you, but he will if Yves Lavigne makes him.
Pete Sell -32
You can’t say he’s a quitter. You also can’t say that performance helped him any. Just be glad Lavigne’s indecision didn’t get him seriously injured.
Matt Hamill +90
He can outwrestle most good strikers and now looks like he can outstrike good wrestlers. We’re almost ready to believe that his loss to Rich Franklin really was friendship-related. Almost.
Mark Munoz -48
Welcome to the UFC. Now keep your hands up.
Gray Maynard +97
You don’t have to like him, but at least admit that “The Bully” is no joke. He turned into a boxer and battered a very tough opponent like it was an easy sparring session. Still doesn’t finish fights, but doesn’t lose them either.
Jim Miller -40
No one looked as surprised as Miller when it became clear that Maynard wanted to keep it standing. Surprise soon turned to dismay, then to swollen and bloody. Looks like it’s back to Fight Nights.
Kendall Grove +53
It’s always nice to win a must-win, and in definitive fashion. It will keep him hanging around, but for how long?
Jason Day -51
A willingness to fight anyone, anytime is nice, but not if you don’t win some of them.
Tamdan McCrory +42
How can you not like “The Barn Cat”? He needed that win, even if he didn’t get the entrance music he wanted, and he just seems so damn likable. Hope he’s around for a long time.
Brandon Vera +45
Looked like shades of his old self as he leg-kicked the hell out of Patt. Can he do it against someone who matters? His next fight should answer that. Maybe it will even be on the main card.
Yves Lavigne is usually better than that, so we’re willing to believe it was just an off night. That Rick Fike character has earned no such leeway. Aren’t we at the point where we can demand qualified, experienced professionals no matter where the event is?
Main Event Musical Chairs -137
After announcing Mir/Lesnar prematurely, the UFC plays dumb until they’re forced to admit it’s off and then asks Rampage to fight for the third time in four months or else they’ll give it to Machida. Now we’re determining title fights by asking who can get ready on short notice? Bad idea.