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Pre-Thanksgiving Rumor Funhouse

Apologies to those of you who patiently waited all day yesterday for our weekly rumor feature, which has been making us tons of new friends in the industry, believe me. After the jump, you’ll find five juicy items, mostly pertaining to guys getting screwed out of money. As usual, four are complete fabrications, and one is 100% on the level. Can you solve the mystery? Can we avoid getting sued for one more week? Time will tell!


Jay Hieron was offered a contract by the UFC that paid approximately half of what his Bellator contract pays, and he was going to take it because of the exposure he would have gotten fighting in the Octagon. But when the UFC spotted him on a Bellator broadcast, they connected the dots and figured out he was also in talks with the fledgling promotion, and pulled their offer off of the table.

This ESPN article about Karo Parisyan‘s troubled return to the UFC left out one even more troubling detail: He was planning on no-showing the fight. One of Karo’s cornermen decided to check in on him at his hotel room before going to bed last Friday, and discovered Parisyan with his bags packed, heading out to his rental car. The cornerman spent over an hour pleading with Karo to stay and go through with the fight. Karo finally agreed to let the cornerman hang on to his wallet and car keys, and stayed up the entire night in his hotel room ordering room service and watching movies.

– In the wake of F@ggotgate, the UFC is making Joe Rogan donate his TUF 12 Finale broadcasting salary to the Trevor Project. Joe will work the phrase "it gets better" into his commentary at least twice that night.

– After the Harris/Falcao fight at UFC 123, Maiquel Falcao was offered two choices: You can have your win bonus, or you can have another fight in the UFC; you can’t have both. Falcao chose to forfeit his win bonus for another chance to prove himself. ‘Big Rig’ will most likely compete in the first match of the prelims during the UFC’s return to Dublin in March. His opponent will not be Rousimar Palhares.

– After Arianny Celeste and Tiki Ghosn were outed as a couple, their relationship became strained, and Tiki finally broke things off with Arianny over the weekend. Yes, he broke up with her. (She’s been telling friends that it was a "mutual" decision.) Last night, Arianny was spotted at PURE Nightclub making out in a booth with TUF 3 vet Tait Fletcher.

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ReX13- November 26, 2010 at 11:51 am
I can't believe none of you guys mentioned the Zimmer-Martinez rematch.
ghostboner- November 26, 2010 at 11:46 am
So I just had an idea - CP should include a little recap of which was the true rumor from last week. Idea is good, yes?
Fried Taco- November 26, 2010 at 7:54 am
I don't know what this is about, but I wanted to add my name to the list, too.

rlh61 Says:
I agree!!! And I just wanted to get in on the action!!

jimbonics Says: *LOUD NOISES!*

doowm Says:

cecils_pupils Says:
WORD!

Zescape Says:

Viva Hate Says:
WORD!

D1ck4 Says:
agreed

Anhonestmoose Says:
yep

tooseriousposter Says:
Long time reader, first time poster. Joined to say this.

Mr_Misanthropy Says:
Oh yeah-

ReX13 says: *Unleash the fury of bold!*

GetUpAndKill Says: (originally)
CP please include a little re-cap of last weeks true rumor on every new segment!!!!!
The Librarian- November 25, 2010 at 6:04 pm
For the record:

rlh61 Says:
I agree!!! And I just wanted to get in on the action!!

jimbonics Says: *LOUD NOISES!*

doowm Says:

cecils_pupils Says:
WORD!

Zescape Says:

Viva Hate Says:
WORD!

D1ck4 Says:
agreed

Anhonestmoose Says:
yep

tooseriousposter Says:
Long time reader, first time poster. Joined to say this.

Mr_Misanthropy Says:
Oh yeah-

ReX13 says: *Unleash the fury of bold!*

GetUpAndKill Says: (originally)
CP please include a little re-cap of last weeks true rumor on every new segment!!!!!
rlh61- November 25, 2010 at 3:44 pm
jimbonics Says:
Wed, 11/24/2010 - 18:15
doowm Says:
Wed, 11/24/2010 - 16:35
Anhonestmoose Says:
Wed, 11/24/2010 - 16:57
yep

tooseriousposter Says:
Long time reader, first time poster. Joined to say this.
Mr_Misanthropy Says:
Oh yeah- ReX13 says:
"GetUpAndKill Says: "CP please include a little re-cap of last weeks true rumor on every new segment!!!!!""
What they said please!

I agree!!! And I just wanted to get in on the action!!
cecils_pupils- November 25, 2010 at 8:57 am
After careful consideration, methinks the Karo rumor is true. bhhhrrrooo
Sudos KFC- November 24, 2010 at 10:46 pm
: "CP please include a little re-cap of last weeks true rumor on every new segment.
KarmaAteMyCat- November 24, 2010 at 10:41 pm
Joe Rogan is so FUCKING FUNNY! Thanks for linking that video.
SnakeJake- November 24, 2010 at 8:16 pm
Karo staying up all night ordering roomservice and watching movies sounds like something I would do. Except I would eat chocolate and watch Tosh.0. Panick attacks are a bitch.

I'm thinking it's Karo.
DazedNConfused- November 24, 2010 at 6:51 pm
It's the Heiron one, I swear I read about it last week somewhere. Although Karo could be true. Just because he mindfucks himself on a regular basis.
danomite- November 24, 2010 at 5:55 pm
You weren't offensive enough this time CP! Are you tired of alienating every human being involved in this sport already? Here's a Joe Rogan rumor that would have been worse than that weak shit you made up:

-Long time friends of Joe Rogan say that it's totally cool for him to drop the F(aggot)-Bomb because back in the day Andy Dick used to blow him for drugs on the set of Newsradio.

By the way, Newsradio is on hulu and there's an episode in season 4 with Joe vs. Andy in an MMA fight.
RearNakedSpoon- November 24, 2010 at 5:55 pm
I couldn't breath for about 10 seconds with paralyzing laughter after remembering who Tait Fletcher is. Cheers.

I'll ignore the easily realistic Jay Hieron rumor and say the Karo rumor to be true.
Your Dumb- November 24, 2010 at 5:52 pm
I think these post's would work if it was presented as a poll where readers can make a guess on which one is true and the winners can get potato chips. Just to give them purpose.
jimbonics- November 24, 2010 at 5:15 pm
doowm Says:
Wed, 11/24/2010 - 16:35

Anhonestmoose Says:
Wed, 11/24/2010 - 16:57

yep

tooseriousposter Says:

Long time reader, first time poster. Joined to say this.

Mr_Misanthropy Says:

Oh yeah- ReX13 says:

"GetUpAndKill Says: "CP please include a little re-cap of last weeks true rumor on every new segment!!!!!""
What they said please!
BigPhil- November 24, 2010 at 4:37 pm
Against my better judgment, I am going to say that I may have actually enjoyed this otherwise terrible idea for a weekly series. Probably because of the mention of something bad happening to Karo. Even if it is made up, it kind of makes me happy.


NO!
doowm- November 24, 2010 at 4:35 pm
Anhonestmoose Says:
Wed, 11/24/2010 - 16:57

yep

tooseriousposter Says:

Long time reader, first time poster. Joined to say this.

Mr_Misanthropy Says:

Oh yeah- ReX13 says:

"GetUpAndKill Says: "CP please include a little re-cap of last weeks true rumor on every new segment!!!!!""
What they said please!
Chromium- November 24, 2010 at 4:19 pm
Oh, I should add that I too, would really like to see them actually reveal the answer to this at some point.

Also, I really don't think it's the Hieron one. Even if you were to go with the best-case scenario on his Bellator contract, I don't think the UFC would make a Top-15 WW a contract offer that starts at under 10k + 10k.

I'm going with the Karo one or _maybe_ the Arriany one.
cecils_pupils- November 24, 2010 at 3:49 pm
WORD!

D1ck4 says:

agreed

Anhonestmoose Says:

yep

tooseriousposter Says:

Long time reader, first time poster. Joined to say this.

Mr_Misanthropy Says:

Oh yeah- ReX13 says:

"GetUpAndKill Says: "CP please include a little re-cap of last weeks true rumor on every new segment!!!!!""
ThrashingMad- November 24, 2010 at 3:48 pm
I would honestly believe all of them but maybe the fourth and fifth, so maybe they have been nerfed a bit. Regardless though, I believe the Hieron one the most.
RwilsonR- November 24, 2010 at 3:46 pm
^^^ Sorry guys, but there just didn’t seem to be enough people complaining about the rumor mill this week. So how was that? I even misused 'you’re', 'there' and ‘it’s’ for an added level of authenticity.

By the way, the true rumor is the Arianny one. She can’t get enough of tri-colored goatees rubbing up against her clit.
RwilsonR- November 24, 2010 at 3:45 pm
Come on CP... your better than this. Their are other websites that try to pull this kind of rumor crap, but its shit like this article that makes me want to go to Bloody Elbow and never come back!!!
Chromium- November 24, 2010 at 3:40 pm
I don't believe the Hieron story. It should not come as a shock to the UFC that he was entertaining other offers while in negotiations with the UFC. Also Bellator's contracts escalate as they win fights in the tournament, so there's no way to say what "half" of a Bellator contract is worth since that depends how well they do in the tournament, and also whether he'd stick around if he lost before the finals. With Dan Hornbuckle and a few other tough guys in that tournament it's not like he was guaranteed to win it anyway (although I suppose maybe the "half" part meant what he'd make if he won his first three fights in either promotion).

The Harris firing was to make a general example, and that example has now been made. I don't believe that Dana White was so mad that they'd make an ultimatum to Falcao. It's not like his win bonus is a lot of money to the UFC either. It's counter-productive for the UFC to get a reputation for doing shit like that if you don't reach an arbitrary level of exciting, even when you win.

I don't think the UFC could or would voluntarily make Rogan donate his salary. Maybe they'd donate money on Rogan's behalf, or Rogan would do it on his own volition. Rogan is one of the most valuable employees they have so I really don't see them forcing him to give up a paycheck, and if they did I think they'd make it public that Rogan was donating money to the Trevor project, since the appearance of the act seems like entire point.

I was thinking the Arianny story until the last sentence. I have trouble believing she would make out with Tait Fletcher, even if she dated Tiki Ghosn.

The Karo story is plausible though, especially after reading the article (read it, it's disturbing). I'll choose that one.
Zescape- November 24, 2010 at 3:33 pm
Bryan F Says:
D1ck4 Says:
Anhonestmoose Says:
tooseriousposter Says:
Mr_Misanthropy Says:
TeamDagger Says:
ReX13 Says:
GetUpAndKill Says:

"CP please include a little re-cap of last weeks true rumor on every new segment!!!!!"

But you won't, will you?
Viva Hate- November 24, 2010 at 3:32 pm
It is the Jay Hieron story that is true.

WORD!

D1ck4 Says:
Wed, 11/24/2010 - 15:06
agreed

Anhonestmoose Says:

yep

tooseriousposter Says:

Long time reader, first time poster. Joined to say this.

Mr_Misanthropy Says:

Oh yeah- ReX13 says:

"GetUpAndKill Says: "CP please include a little re-cap of last weeks true rumor on every new
LAS- November 24, 2010 at 3:29 pm
My comment shitting on this column was flagged as potential spam? Go blow it out your ass, CP.
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