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Quick Hits: Baby Names, Weight Class Jumps, Opinionated Rants, + More

(Welcome to the world, Jameson twins.  You’re screwed.)

Tito Ortiz and Jenna Jameson have put the unfathomable power of their two super-brains to work and come up with names for their newborn twins: Jesse and Journey Jett. 

You know, considering who their parents are, I’d say these kids got off pretty easy.  Although it is a bit of a screw-job to give one kid a normal name and then name the other after a band that won’t even be ironically cool anymore by the time they’re in junior high.  But hey, as long as they’re both carrying around the illustrious Jameson surname neither one of them is going to be lacking in emotional baggage.

In other news…

- Miguel Torres is looking for greener pastures and better paydays with a move up in weight, but he’s not settling for going up just one weight class.  The WEC 135-pound champ tells that he’d eventually like to move up to 155 pounds and get a contract with the UFC as a lightweight.  He’s right when he says he’d make more money that way, but would he really stand a chance against the Gray Maynards and Sean Sherks of the world?  Only one way to find out.  I’m intrigued.

- The UFC hasn’t been to Detroit since UFC 9 in 1996, but they may be on their way back in late 2009 or early 2010.  Just the idea of going to Detroit for a UFC event is depressing to me, but VP of Regulatory Affairs Marc Ratner says the UFC has been seeing strong pay-per-view numbers and good Spike TV ratings in Michigan.  Better keep one hand on your wallet while you’re there, UFC.  Just saying.

- Finally, if you’re like me you’re sick of B.J. Penn’s quixotic quest to destroy Georges St. Pierre with his requests to have the welterweight champ suspended, fined, and showered down before every fight.  But unlike me, you probably don’t have a column on which to rant about your disappointment with “The Prodigy.”  Don’t worry, I went ahead and did it for you.  You can thank me later.  Or send me hateful, hurtful emails.  Either one.

Cagepotato Comments

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UFC fan- March 19, 2009 at 10:45 am
Hey Johnny mack you are fucking retard.
I just want to go on record and tell you, before anyone else can beat me to it. YOU ARE A RETARDED MORON.
I guess all that Vaseline punched, and KICKED the living fuck out of Penn to begin with. LONG before it hit the ground, BJ was getting his face...and ribs...and big goofy head bashed in by.......VASELINE?
Or was that GSP's gloved fist? Lets go to the judges card...ding ding ding, all say Gloved fist, sorry johnny dumbass.
Now once Bitch J was PUT on his ass it wasn't grease or vaseline or any other excuse that allowed GSP to posture up and punch that Hawaiian melon several times over and over, no again it was his gloved the video shows, vaseline didn't jump up run over and beat the living fuck out Bitch jr, nope video proof of gloved fists, belonging to mr GSP were rocking his noggin.
You know why Pussy penn couldn't get his guard up? Cause little tweety birds were flying in his head, and he thought he was Batman from the brain damage that GSP did to his fucking messed up brain.
He didn't know a rubber guard from his rubber ducky.
And you sir don't know your ass from your elbow.
When a group of officials like the ones Blow Job went before to whine like a girl say it had no effect then maybe you should listen.
Or you can be like your hero Pennywise and believe that UFO special agents greased up GSP with double secret greasy stuff, and that caused him to perform better than humanly possible.
COOL!- March 19, 2009 at 8:58 am
just a fight fan- March 19, 2009 at 8:36 am
how could the not name them "Jay and Jonah"?
Joo- March 19, 2009 at 8:35 am
When I was a kid a bunch of my friends and I gathered at another friends house to watch a pee-wee football tape his parents had made. Well, at the end of the 1st quarter it cut straight to his good looking mom licking his dads junk. We're in our mid 20's and we still talk about it. Tito's kid's friends are gonna have (google search "Jenna Jameson Fuck" first picture) taped to thier trapper keepers.
DetroitMMAfan11- March 19, 2009 at 8:32 am
lmao. 12 gauge? if you come to detroit i hope you bring something more gangsta than that. we carry carbon 15s with the 100 round drum. : )
DetroitMMAfan11- March 19, 2009 at 8:28 am
detroit/michigan deserves a ufc ppv event lol. we are suffering more than any other state in the US right now with this crappy economy. even at that, i guarantee a ufc event at joe louis arena or the palace of auburn hills would sell out in a matter of hours.
Jay- March 19, 2009 at 8:28 am
Why are Tito and Jenny making their "O" faces?
emptyhandkiller- March 19, 2009 at 7:32 am
One good thing about the twins' births.... the doctor actually walked into her baby hole and carried out the twins. He was greeted at the edge of her vagina by Tito and three nurses. Everyone healthy and happy!!! Go Tito, GOOOO!!!!
Johnnymack..- March 19, 2009 at 7:27 am
Sorry...just one more thing...I don't think BJ really had a chance, he came out looking dead on his feet to begin with but we'll never know if he could have pulled something off on the ground and it doesn't exuse gsp or his corner in the least. I wish Penn had just stayed at 155 and made a legacy for himself.
Johnnymack..- March 19, 2009 at 7:18 am
All right..... For all you guys ..Ben included..who seem to think that because the Jackson camp said ..."Uh, it was an acciident !...ya, an accident!.." That it was in fact an accident...I got a bridge I'd like to sell ya. ....on ...tape. It's not a "breathing technique" it's not an accident..It is Phil Nurse taking his greased up hands and rubbing them on GSP's neck, shoulders, arms, chest and back.
I get it, you people love "Growth horomone Pierre" to the point that you have blinded yourself to any form of reality..but try to have some perspective. It's right there on's all over the interenet...GSP and his camp got caught red handed trying to gain an edge. They didn't fill his gloves with lead or shoot BJ with a tranqualizer dart but they did something that is considered cheating and wont admit it. They are being just as childish as BJ about it but because GSP is so popular people could care less.

And it did have an effect on BJS's performance...There I said it...Watch his legs the whole time he is trying to obtain rubber gaurd..GSP doesn't shrug them off or power out of them..They slide down his back with so much ease that it's ridiculous.
I'm sure some of you can form complex thought so try to pay attetion. BJ Penn is known for having one of ,if not th most, dangerous gaurds in mma. If he had been able to obtain any kind of grip on GSP's body while he was on his back the fight could very well have had a different out come. BJ could have stopped GSP from posturing, he could have avoided strikes and he could have attemeted submissions. All I can say is watch the Tape again...It is painfully obvious that GSP is to greasy for Penn to lock in any kind of effective gaurd. I don't like Penn as a person, but he fights cleanly and deserves a fair fight. Calling this whole thing childish and petty on Penn's part just because you like GSP better is riduculous. Ands grow up yourselves a bit CP..When someone gets caught and says "I didn't do it" they are not always telling the truth...whether you loikie them or not.
CanadianProduce- March 19, 2009 at 6:50 am
Nice article Ben...I was a little unsure where you stood on the whole debacle. It's nice to see cooler heads prevail and that a reasonable person can see that BJ is screwing himself over.
bold- March 19, 2009 at 4:39 am
oh my fucking god thats gotta be the two uglyest people ive ever seen
LukeTheDuke- March 19, 2009 at 3:59 am
That picture says it all....can we get one of those face mixer uppers to see what their kids are gonna look like?
Dakyn- March 19, 2009 at 2:10 am
Jesus, are they smiling?
Anonymous- March 19, 2009 at 1:28 am
fuck jenna looks stick thin.

she looks unhealthy man she needs more protein.

guess shes given up the cock meat sandwich, poor Tito :P
This Guy- March 19, 2009 at 12:33 am
@ UFC fan Goog expressed his opinion elegantly and in an articulate manor. I came off very brash, but if anything it was more to show how the article was presented. As far as that subject goes, he put it very well. You sir, did not.

It's like what Fat Irish Pirate said. I would have made the same statement if he mentioned Texas or any other state. It's no reason for that type of ignorance to be spread.

Cage Potato has much better taste than that. Labeling a whole city as thieves, just renforces every negative stereotype, and saying they don't deserve a UFC event is idiotic. Like Drunken idiots haven't been posted on youtube fighting in the stands when they go to other states. Way to be a hypocrit, I dont hear anyone saying they shouldn't go back there. News flash, stupid people live every where.
Fat Irish Pirate- March 18, 2009 at 11:58 pm
I dont like stereotypes either! I mean, with all y'all say about us Texans being full of rednecks and inbred retards with guns and diving trucks and everything, I dont like these kinds of comments either. It's idiotic and hurtful to people.

And I'll tell you this, when UFC goes to Detroit, I as a faithful fan, will jump in my Ford truck, take my first cousin on up for a romantical getaway, and if any of them yankee bastards try to mess with me they can talk to my 12 gauge.

Peace from Dallas, stay Southern, yo
T Rex- March 18, 2009 at 10:53 pm
I'm still amazed that Jenna Jameson is even able to get pregnant.
War Machine's Dad- March 18, 2009 at 10:37 pm
My ex-wife shat out a lil rotten fucker 2!
M.- March 18, 2009 at 10:30 pm
I take it you don't speak the Queen's english. Please do the english speaking world a favor and never post again.
Thoughts- March 18, 2009 at 10:16 pm
Jesse "The Jack Hammer", team punishment fighter, grows up to defeat a withered Ken Shamrock who will, even at the age of 64, refuse to say its over. Tito is found in the crowd wearing his old UFC belt and a t-shirt that reads "Dana White Is My Bitch". When interviewed after the fight Tito says "Look at the head on that kid. That is an Ortiz head right there; Hard as a rock. Ken was soft when I fought him and I think this proves that today."

Journey "Jizzim" Jett, the next generation porn star, at the ripe young age of 18 has the rounds with mom's old friends in a porn series that goes on to win the 2027 AVN award for best anal scene with a woman over 60. In his acceptance speech he claims all his moves were passed down from his mother. Mom is so proud, but her latest botox job wont allow her to smile anymore.

Goog- March 18, 2009 at 9:41 pm
@ UFC Fan... um, no.

@ Frank Mur.... lol I agree. No million wieners. But she's got production companies and a brand that'll be a cash cow for years without her needing to show her face [or anything else].

I almost took a job in Auburn Hills a couple years ago. Nice area, but people in Detroit don't consider that "Detroit". Just like the mayor bitching about Jay Leno promoting his free concert in Detroit... at the Palace. She has a point. And you supported what I'd said - alot of the tourist driven businesses and areas are coming along nicely. There's still work to be done, but it's a nice start. I wouldn't have said that 10 years ago, but things are changing.
Frank Mur- March 18, 2009 at 9:32 pm
putting a gazillion wieners in yer mouth is bad business, and marrying a woman who's had a gazillion wieners in her mouth...even worse! I guess for some folks it's all about the CASH! As far as Detroit getting a UFC event, that would be great, every big city has it's ghettos and "bad" spots. Detroit is no exception by any means, however it's bright spots are incredible from the new casinos to the older hot spots like Greektown, check out the medias praise of the city during the super bowl. I'd love to see the UFC come to the "D", but it wouldn't hurt my feelings to see it at the Palace either, I work next door.
UFC fan- March 18, 2009 at 9:17 pm
You hear that " this guy" Goog just called you spades a buncha fucking spades.
word! stay black yo! :)
Goog- March 18, 2009 at 8:46 pm
I've been to Detroit a lot over the years. I guess you have to call a spade a spade. For n-o-w... it is what it is. Yes, it's got a lot of run down and dangerous areas and looks pretty pretty bleak, but they've also been trying to divert a big chunk of money to redevelop several of the sport complexes and tourist-type areas and attractions over the last several years. It's not quite there yet, but I think it's got a lot of character and when all the pieces finally come together, it'll be another city that typifies one slice of American life. It reminds me of Pittsburgh in a lot of ways. Industrial, scrappy city with bright spots and low points alike.

So yeah... it's got potential and is moving towards brightening it up, but it's still unnerving to be in certain areas at night.

And like it was said above... it's just cool to bust on Tito and Jenna, I guess. He's played money games with the organizations and had a rough outing as a commentator, but at the end of it all, he put ALOT of asses in the seats while UFC was gaining momentum. And Jenna's bad surgery aside, she's made a gajillion dollars and is set for life, unlike alot of the others who get into porn, burn out on drugs, and die young and penniless. Those two are alot of things, but bad business people? No.