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Rampage Says He’s Fighting Rashad Evans in Memphis, Baby, In December

(Props: computercowboytv via FiveOunces.)

Allow us to translate for those who don’t speak jive:

Computer: Hey everybody, it’s Computer. You may remember me as the personal assistant from Three Six Mafia’s old reality show, Adventures in Hollyhood. I’m here with my friend Quinton Jackson. Quinton, would you like to say a few words?

Jackson: Hey guys, Rampage here. My friend Computer and I are from the Southern United States; you should already know what that implies. By the way, I punch people in their mouths. I know, it’s not really relevant to the conversation at hand, but I’m a little intoxicated, and it’s what I do.

Computer: It’s true, he does do that! Man, it’s great to be from Memphis, Tennessee! Speaking of which, Rashad Evans is going to get knocked out, sooner rather than later.

Jackson: Specifically, in Memphis this December.

Computer: Fighting’s great.

Jackson: Yes, It certainly is.

Computer: Indeed.


The UFC has not announced their December pay-per-view event yet, and no other fights have been rumored for the card, though the TUF 10 finale is scheduled for December 5th in Las Vegas. UFC 107 (probably) would be the first UFC event in Rampage’s hometown of Memphis, and only their second event held in Tennessee, following UFC Fight Night: Condit vs. Kampmann, which was held in Nashville. It is still unclear why anybody would nickname himself "Computer."

Cagepotato Comments

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Jugger- July 2, 2009 at 6:41 am
God's Street Soldier has a potty-mouth.
BackbaconBilly- July 1, 2009 at 6:47 pm
it isn't about being a good fight or not, why are we waiting till dec for a matchup that should be taking place now to decide who fights Machida ( or shogun ) next, like I already said the filming of TUF gets in the way of the proper order of things. Whats more important, having two popular fighters as coaches or having the proper fighters fighting to be the next contender?
UFC fan- July 1, 2009 at 6:06 pm
Jay Smith Says:
Wed, 07/01/2009 - 16:04

Could someone near UFC Fan please slap the piss out of his racist ass."

yes PLEASE try!
Videodrome_NOW- July 1, 2009 at 5:09 pm
F that. who else isn't fuckin down to see two world class fighting "brothas" throw down??? this is a fight i've been dying to see since Eastman vs. Jackson. I fucking love it!!
Endocat- July 1, 2009 at 4:35 pm
hold up, hold up, hold up

"fighting for these ho's?" you got the game messed up Computer, its "we out here not loving these ho's"

North Memphis, North Memphis, North Memphis
Soda Popinski- July 1, 2009 at 4:13 pm
OpShut, yeah graceland is in memphis. But, but I think graceland is a little off the beaten path of memphis. Meaning, I think its a little out of the mix from where they'll probably do the UFC event, which im assuming would be somewhere downtown.

Or it might take place on beale street.
Jay Smith- July 1, 2009 at 4:04 pm
Could someone near UFC Fan please slap the piss out of his racist ass.
thaigger- July 1, 2009 at 3:26 pm
i hope rampage breaks rashads jaw
OpShut- July 1, 2009 at 3:21 pm
@ Soda Popinski - Thanks for the heads up. The wife always wanted to see Graceland, so I was thinking of killing two birds with one stone....perhaps I'll pass on the Rodney King Redux....'Page going to KTFO that Sanford and Son mf'er....

/Graceland is somewhere near this joint, no?
MethLabTechnician- July 1, 2009 at 3:20 pm
Nice one UFC fan, just when I was beginning to believe the stupidity bar had been raised as high as it could go you some how manage to bring it to dizzying new heights. Please tell me you are a 12 year old on summer vacation.
BackbaconBilly- July 1, 2009 at 3:17 pm
@ Markdog

No I don't see that likely to happen, look this is what I am trying to get at...

Shogun is the #1 contender correct? ( making him actually #2 ) even tho he has not beaten rashad or ( rampage in UFC )
That leaves Rashad the former champ at #3 and Rampage at #4

If Machida beats Shogun ( and he should ) then it should be the winner of rashad Vs rampage to move back into the contender spot ( should it not? ) and fight Machida as soon as practical, but if rampage isn't going to fight rashad till dec what does the UFC do keep machida waiting till next year to fight a true contender or throw him a can. The last thing we need in the 205's division is whats been happening in the 185 division with Silva ( which is basically throwin him cans ) The UFC needs to keep putting the top fighters up against the divisional champs, not waiting 6 months for the #3 & 4 guys to decide who's better.

Honestly, Shogun should not even be the contender atm Rashad and rampage should be fighting at 100 or 101 to decide who is the next contender, there shouldn't be any wait ( I realize the TUF programing comes into play ) but it ruins the natural contender line-up.
Soda Popinski- July 1, 2009 at 3:09 pm
rashad vs rampage in memphis.

i can say with confidence that this might be the most violent event UFC has ever put on.

and im talking about the fans that are gonna show up for this one.

seriously UFC, instead of passing out fight of the night bonuses, you might want to think about using the cash for extra security.

im from nashville and have to say that memphis can be downright scary. put those 2 dudes fighting each other in the mix and you're looking at round 2 of the rodney king riots.

good times.
philoebeddoe- July 1, 2009 at 2:26 pm
If Shogun is the new champ then Rampage gets a chance at a rematch when he ko's Rashad via body slam (Arona style)...

Rampage has a better shot against Shogun than Machida...
Markdog- July 1, 2009 at 2:06 pm

Really? What is going to change? Shogun gonna be the new champ?
Darkside- July 1, 2009 at 2:03 pm
Rampage sounded pretty wasted. Hope someone took the keys to his monster truck away from him.
BackbaconBilly- July 1, 2009 at 1:57 pm
Fighting Rashad in Dec won't mean shit, too much will have changed by then. This would be like Fedor fighting Randy now ( who cares ) Nope, the UFC blew a good chance for an interesting matchup between rashad and rampage no true fan cares about this black on black crime bullshit.
831 Son- July 1, 2009 at 1:32 pm
Thats the worst attempt at an insult I have heard since HAL was here. You have no life. Hurry up and die already, your parents as well as CagePotato will much appreciate it. Thanks. Bye bye bitch.
UFC fan- July 1, 2009 at 1:17 pm
ohhhh P.s.

Rashad's gonna get that " niggered-up" ass knocked out AGAIN.

we now return you to your normal douchebaggery channel.
UFC fan- July 1, 2009 at 1:15 pm
That needed no translation, I am fluent in southern jive.
however I cannot understand a word them "cali" fags is talking about.
all I ever hear is : " CUM to Cali so I can fuck my mother, and I will BURY a cock in you! Im gonna fuck my mother again real quick cause you piss me off, and I like being pissed on, and if you would ever DARE to CUM to "Cali" I would knock you out with my bad dicksucking breath and nasty body odor and use chocolate sauce to toss that salad cause thats how us unbathed aids infested big mouth's roll. Oh and UFC fan I have a hard-on the size of texas for you".

see that's all I see and hear, I am glad I am from the south cause those weirdo's in californication fucking scare me with their viral warfare talk.
Ceeph- July 1, 2009 at 12:39 pm
Gotta love some good ol fashioned racism!
karate is back- July 1, 2009 at 12:37 pm
hahahah great translation! i would have never understood what was going on!
831 Son- July 1, 2009 at 12:28 pm
No thats fag talk.
Goog- July 1, 2009 at 12:24 pm
831 Son,

You forgot to use a "LOL" and a "ROFLMAO". Otherwise... that was an AWESOME post.
PingPong- July 1, 2009 at 12:23 pm
@ Videodrome

The better for us, the worse for Rampage LOL
Dubbayoo- July 1, 2009 at 12:22 pm