It seems like it’s been an eternity since we’ve checked in with our buddy War Machine, peddler of all things conspiracy and sexer of all things bologna. After a nasty ACL tear and a couple rough stints in the clink, the mixed martial artist formerly known as
Prison Mike John Koppenhaver is finally set to make his Bellator debut on June 19th at Bellator 96. Perhaps to boost some awareness of his return, or perhaps because he is crazier than a shithouse rat, Machine has once again taken aim at one of his enemies using the power of the Internet. No, not President Obama, we’re talking about tightwad MMA sponsors, obviously.
In any case, Machine has been tweeting up a storm as of late, and his tweets contain the usual mix of hilarious ignorance and self sabotage that we have come to expect from the porn world’s most notorious bad boy. We’ve compiled our top 10 favorites (via @WarMachine170) for your viewing pleasure below. Welcome back, old friend.
10. A WAR MMA Main Event in the Making
9. Modesty at its Finest
8. Just in Case You Didn’t Read #9
7, 6, 5, 4, and 3. War Machine: Future Fighter’s Union Rep
1. One Can Only Hope
And hot off the press…
May the Wunderbar Gods smile upon you on this day, you crazy son of a bitch. For your sake, we just hope that Evan Tanner does not have an in with those Gods.