(“Chainsaw-f*cking” jokes are so much funnier when Dane Cook does them.)

In their continuing efforts to pick up the best fighters that Zuffa doesn’t want, Bellator has reportedly signed former UFC heavyweight prospect Sean McCorkle to compete on the undercard of Bellator 60, March 9th in Hammond, Indiana. According to Sherdog, his opponent is expected to be Richard “Big Man” White, who has lost ten of his last twelve fights.

McCorkle’s brief spin through the Octagon was highlighted by an agonizing weight cut, a debut victory against Mark Hunt, and back-to-back stoppage losses against Stefan Struve and Christian Morecraft. Since then, he’s gone 3-0 in regional leagues, with all wins by first-round submission. Like many of his early opponents, his last two victims carried losing records. McCorkle is already booked to face Mike Gordon next Saturday at a North American Allied Fight Series event in West Virginia. Gordon is undefeated in sanctioned MMA competition, with a perfect record of 1-0. Christ, Sean, where do you find these people?

Bellator 60 will kick off the promotion’s sixth season, and will feature a featherweight title fight between Pat Curran and Joe Warren, as well as all four quarterfinal matches in the Season 6 featherweight bracket. The event was originally scheduled to take place on March 2nd, but that date has now been scrapped.

Semi-related Sean McCorkle quote: ”I always said in the past, the only people who take steroids are the guys who like winning and money.”