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Report: Jon Jones Verbally Agrees to Murder Old Man in Utah


("He was like this when I found him.")

Look, I like Vladimir Matyushenko. I like that he’s 39 years old and still has enough spunk to whoop on much-younger dudes like Eliot Marshall and Igor Pokrajac. But when I see this report on TheGarv.com saying that he and Jon Jones have verbally agreed to face each other at UFC on Versus 2 (August 1st, Salt Lake City), I have to question his management and the UFC’s matchmaking. Not that the Janitor would ever duck a fight, but holy crap is this going to be an annihilation. Matyushenko’s strength is his wrestling; so was Matt Hamill‘s, and Hamill got ragdolled and torn to shreds. And on the feet? Forget about it. There’s no way that Vlad will be quick enough to avoid the unpredictable attacks that Jones might throw at him. I hate to count guys out, but I just don’t see one scenario in which Matyushenko manages to shock the world. Can’t wait to see the betting line on this one.

It’s unfortunate that Jones wouldn’t be getting a solid step up in competition after destroying Brandon Vera last month, but I think the UFC’s motivations are clear here: Jones is already in line for a title shot, but he has to keep winning until the Machida/Shogun/Rampage/Evans contender logjam sorts itself out. Why risk giving Jones a loss in the meantime? It’s a cynical interpretation of the matchup, but no other explanation makes sense…

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Sgt. Grumbles- April 29, 2010 at 12:26 pm
I do what I do.
Barc- April 29, 2010 at 10:24 am
I was hoping for a solid main event for the first UFC here in Utah. Grampa Matty will make a good fight for Jones, but to say it in terms all of you will understand, I've had better.
fatbellyfrank- April 29, 2010 at 3:25 am
Oh and Sgt Grumbles, your trolling right? Parchy's considered Royalty round these parts
fatbellyfrank- April 29, 2010 at 3:24 am
Bones will have to much for Vlad, and as for Bones v's Silva, I'd suggest Bones would make Silva pay attention and actually fight, but not yet, Silva would take him. For now
ghostboner- April 29, 2010 at 12:19 am
@Ratel & Slug trail - You are trying to joke me, no? Sliva would shit in Jones' face. I'll give Jon some credit, he would prob give silva a better fight than anyone at 185, but I don't see him winning.
LargeMidget- April 28, 2010 at 6:37 pm
YES! I LAUGHED!!!! Thank god! For the first time since BF left, an update has made me laugh out loud.

Props for that headline and caption, whoever wrote it. THAT's some CP shit.
ccman- April 28, 2010 at 5:56 pm
This is not the best fight the UFC can think of, this is loosening the log jam in the LHW division before adding names. Personally i do not think JJ is ready for a machida, evans,machida,rua match up. he is still to flukey, still beating up guys who are not even gatekeepers (no Vera is not 'elite'). Keep em busy, release the pressure, and avoid the pissed off people who think thier guy deserves next like in the WW's.
Sgt. Grumbles- April 28, 2010 at 5:53 pm
@parchy mcthirst

Have you read this site before?
Komodo- April 28, 2010 at 5:52 pm
@ styrkan - Cosigned... I LOL'd

:D
cecils_pupils- April 28, 2010 at 5:36 pm
Jones is gonna mop the floor with the janitor - pun intended.
Ratel- April 28, 2010 at 5:13 pm
i too want to see silva vs jones. see how far silva runs around during that matchup.
Slug Trail- April 28, 2010 at 4:12 pm
I want to see Jones vs. Anderson Silva. Silva would shit the bed.
Emopinata- April 28, 2010 at 3:47 pm
@ben
yeah, very true.
but obviously dana doesn't care about lay offs, or else he'd match junior dos with cain perhaps? instead of having them both wait on the carwin brock match =/
Denny Slim607- April 28, 2010 at 3:34 pm
Give Jon someone that will move him closer to the top of the division. He needs to fight people that will line him up with a title shot a few fights from now.

607-Holdin' it down in the UFC!!!
MoonBelly- April 28, 2010 at 3:24 pm
I think a matchup with Cane would be great, but Luis is scheduled to fight a newcomer at UFC 114 coming up here soon.
clutchy hopkins- April 28, 2010 at 3:10 pm
id rather see him up against like...luiz cane. or ryan bader or soszynski. or rogerio nogueira. ahhah
Cut-Throat- April 28, 2010 at 2:45 pm
I am So pumped for the fights here! And now I hear Jones is coming? My day can't get any better!
Kid Clam Curtains- April 28, 2010 at 2:44 pm
Jones, Davis and Bader are still works in progress IMO. Making them fight each other before any of them have reached their potential is stupid. There are plenty of matchups out there to let them develop.

Well, maybe Bader is ready to move up into the upper tier but Davis and Jones are the future of the division. Give them some more time to evolve (especially Davis who needs a lot more experience)
DazedNConfused- April 28, 2010 at 2:42 pm
I think Phil Davis would get picked apart by Jon Jones at the moment. Davis is only a wrestler, where as Jon Jones is a good wrestler with great striking as well. I doubt the UFC would want to have one of their rising prospects (Davis) get fucked up beyond facial recognition this early in his career.

I think this is a dumbass matchup though. I'm cheering for Vlad, fuck it. He's still a legend in my books. I won't put money on it though... haha
ghostboner- April 28, 2010 at 2:27 pm
I think Jones vs thiago silva or Jones vs Phil Davis. Davis looked great in his last outing, and I think a loss to jones now would not derail him too badly.
Mr_Misanthropy- April 28, 2010 at 2:26 pm
...yawn..snort.."...what? Oh, Jon Jones is fighting who? Oh...well I guess I'll at least see a couple more undercard fights..." (rolls over and goes back to sleep)
Headlock- April 28, 2010 at 2:23 pm
Jones vs. Lil' Nog would be a fight of epic proportions!
BryanF- April 28, 2010 at 2:22 pm
HAHAHAHA!
The headline and the pic caption are the reason why I love CP. I had a weird image of Jon Jones spinning-back elbowing some senior citizen out of a wheel chair before I scrolled down to read the article.

But for realz, this matchup doesn't nearly sound like such a squash match. Vladdy's a continuoously top 10-20 ranked LHW on most sites.
parchy mcthirst- April 28, 2010 at 2:18 pm
What biased writing is this? Filth...

The Janitor will mop the floor clean with Jones' head

...or at least that would be nice, fuck his war wagon. it resembles a fisher-price toddler cart with no wheels
Heyuck- April 28, 2010 at 2:16 pm
Why not Jones - Bader? Or Jones - Silva? THIS is seriously the best fight they can think of? I mean...I get that they want to keep him winning in dominate fashion...but holy hell...I'd be more impressed with a win over Luis Cane than Vladi...whether it was a one-sided affair, or a split decision.
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