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Roy Nelson Calls Out Mike Russow (?) for the Right to Remain at 265 lbs.

Rou Nelson Ultimate Fighter 10 winner trophy plaque MMA photos gallery funny
(It took Roy 45 minutes and three chipped teeth to realize that his TUF trophy was not made of rock candy.) 

This town ain’t big enough for the two of them. Literally. The town we’re referring to, of course, would be the UFC’s heavyweight division.

Let’s face it, we are currently in the era of TRT-jacked-up super Goliaths, and aside from making us common folk feel more self-conscious about our own physiques, these monsters are putting forth the idea that you have to be sculpted by the Gods themselves in order to be a successful athlete. How dare they. But there is hope, because one man has been vigorously doing the work that the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance could never even dream of doing in between trips to the buffet line. Mainly, proving that obese individuals are capable of doing more than legally stealing electrically powered wheelchairs from crippled people at the supermarket. That man is Roy “Big Country” Nelson.

Obviously fearing that fellow portly contender Mike Russow is beginning to encroach on his Burger King and Taco Bell sponsorships, as well as the “Lifetime Achievement” distinction he was set to receive at next year’s Cici’s Pizza Awards, Nelson has thrown down a good old fashioned “loser leaves town” challenge to Russow over his Twitter. The winner gets to continue eating pull pork sandwiches until they look like the gluttony victim in Seven, and the loser must drop to the land of rice cakes and milk without chocolate syrup that is the light heavyweight division.

Here’s what he wrote:

I want Mike Russow and loser goes to 205 or becomes Dana White Rich. Let make it happen @danawhite

While it may be in bad taste to call someone out immediately after they have suffered their first UFC loss (by knockout, nonetheless), there’s no denying that this is an intriguing matchup, made even more intriguing by the possible ramifications of either man losing. Being that Russow only fights part time, we’re not sure if he’d actually be able to make the cut to 205, but Nelson, on the other hand, has shown a willingness to at least consider dropping to light heavyweight if the circumstances are ridiculous enough just right.

On an unrelated sidenote, what the hell does Dana White rich mean, and how would either man become so by losing their next fight? Also, Rhode Island, neither a road nor an island. Discuss.

On the heels of a first round knockout of Dave Herman at UFC 146, the TUF 10 winner’s UFC record currently stands at a mediocre 4-3, so a win over Russow would be enough to delay his own trip to 205 for at least a couple more months. One thing standing in the way of this possible matchup, however, would be the UFC’s usual policy of placing winners against winners and losers against losers. Then again, crazier fights have been booked, so it wouldn’t be completely out of left field for them to book Nelson vs. Russow in a battle for potbellied supremacy, right?

Who do you like for this one, Potato Nation?

-J. Jones

Cagepotato Comments

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Mr_Misanthropy- June 26, 2012 at 12:41 am
He looks like Kenny Powers went on a bacon and sausage gravy diet after getting velveeta enemas in that picture.

Winner gets a lifetime supply of Krispy Kreme.
Mr_Misanthropy- June 26, 2012 at 12:34 am
Now that's photoshop. Roy's a fat bastard but he's not a Monchichi.
paperplane- June 25, 2012 at 10:07 pm
I'm surprised Roy still even has a job.
humperdinkal- June 25, 2012 at 9:18 pm
I think(although could be wrong) Nelson was referring to Rich Franklin. While Franklin actually went up a weight class rather than down, he did go to light heavyweight and has stayed there ever since his ass whooping to Anderson Silva. Maybe Nelson hinted that loser stays at light heavyweight, never to return to the HW division??
shatterproof- June 25, 2012 at 3:01 pm
Roy calls out so many guys he should be sponsored by AT&T.
Fried Taco- June 25, 2012 at 2:12 pm
After all the "likes" I gave Roy, and he is still not dropping down to 205? He's a phony and a liar, don't take up his offer Mike!
Dog Dicks Magoo- June 25, 2012 at 1:25 pm
Make them have an eating contest followed by spinning with dizzy bats then put them in the cage. First one to vomit or have a heart attack loses.