(He’s the one in the creepy Jesus t-shirt. Photo courtesy of the UFC 96: Friday Night Preparties set on CombatLifestyle.com.)
SackMikeGoldberg is a new-ish blog by BloodyElbow writer Mike Fagan that specializes in dissing Goldie’s clumsy UFC commentary and the middle-school-caliber writing level of MMA bloggers. (Damn, bro — shoot fish in a barrel much?) Of particular interest is the site’s official drinking game, which does seem like it would get you fucked up in short order:
Take a drink if Mike…
-Says, “Here we go!”
-Says, “It’s all over!”
-Plugs a non-UFC entity during a fight
-Warns, “Watch the upkick(s)!”
-Says anything that Joe directly and immediately refutes
-Mentions Randy Couture or Chuck Liddell (disregard during a Liddell or Couture fight or if Couture is in the broadcast booth)
-References the “official” UFC stats during the main event
-Calls someone a “future UFC hall-of-famer”
-Brings up Griffin/Bonnar I
-Asks “Can he finish?”
-Tells Joe that you can “make the argument”
-Says, “Virtually identical.”
Finish your drink if Mike…
-Doesn’t make you take a drink during a fight that lasts longer than one minute.
To prevent a bad hangover the next morning, we recommend drinking a glass of water every time Mike throws it to "the veteran voice of the Octagon, Bruce Buffer." Though you should definitely do a shot of bottom-shelf tequila every time Goldberg does something that makes his partner visibly uncomfortable.
Now who wants to make the Joe Rogan drinking game?