(Props: MMA Mania)

If you were an MMA fan four years ago, you can probably imagine what your reaction would have been had someone, preferably Scott Bakula from “Quantum Leap,” gone back in time to show you this poster for UFC 99.  For one thing, you would have been blown away that the UFC even made it to UFC 99, and that they hadn’t yet transitioned to an all-robot fighting organization.  Then there’s the shock of seeing Pride bad-ass Wanderlei Silva in the Octagon to face UFC middleweight champ Rich Franklin, and in Germany for fuck’s sake. 

Basically, your head would have exploded right then and there, all over Scott Bakula, which is why time travel is dangerous to begin with and should probably be avoided until we are responsible enough to not use it for stuff like showing fight posters to people.

Now think about how you view this poster in the present day.  It’s still a credible fight, and still interesting, though for entirely different reasons.  Let’s just say no one’s head is in any danger of exploding here, with the possible exception of Wanderlei.  And if you weren’t an MMA fan back in 2005 and you don’t really get what I’m going on about here, allow me to derisively say, noob!

(Click image to see it up close.)

The original UFC 100 poster may have looked killer on its own, but that wasn’t good enough for lookoutawhale, who created this alternate version made up of poster images from past UFC events (as well as random photos of Tank Abbott and the Jim Brown/Bill Wallace commentary team that slipped in by accident). T-minus two months, people…

Hey, all publicity is good publicity, right?

(Props: “JayRoc” on the UG)

(Images courtesy of Sherdog.)

I was holding off on posting about this because I thought a video would turn up by now, but it looks like the video-sharing sites aren’t on fire with undercard matches from EliteXC: Primetime, so here goes.

Posted above is the Sherdog Fight Finder record for Nick “The Mad Monkey” Serra, who completely shamed his family’s name on Saturday night. Sure, you see “DQ (Wouldn’t Get Up From Butt Scoot)” and you think, wow, that’s pretty embarrassing. Dude. Dude. You have no idea.

Matt Serra’s less-successful brother faced off against Matt Makowski, who came into the fight with a 2-0 record. Nick entered the ring wearing a monkey mask, coming off like a broke-ass Jason Miller. (Makowski, for his part, made his ring-walk in spiked shoulder pads, Road Warriors-style.)

True to his nickname, Serra jumped on Makowski’s back after a brief opening exchange, but was slammed to the mat after transitioning to an armbar attempt. Despite throwing a solid upkick from the ground and getting to his feet, Makowski caught him with a couple of nasty uppercuts to close out the round.

Unfortunately, Serra hadn’t planned for round two. By two minutes into the second frame, he was truly, madly, deeply gassed, and his arms wobbled around at his sides. And then it happened. In a desperate attempt to get the fight to the ground, Serra weakly launched a Shinya Aoki-style flying guard-pull, missed Makowski completely, and landed directly on his back. As the crowd “ooh!’d in bemused shock, Serra sheepishly got to his feet. Makowski came in to engage, and Serra intentionally fell backwards onto the mat. Makowski threw his hands up and gave the ref a classic “WTF?” look. The ref ordered Serra to get up. The Mad Monkey refused, and the fight was called for Makowski.

And you know what? That wasn’t even the worst fight on the undercard.

“Ross Pointon by heel hook” sounds like an MMA forum punchline, but on Saturday night it became all too real as Pointon put on a ghetto jiu-jitsu clinic against the dumbfounded Ross Mason. Here’s the video, which ends with the 6-10 Pointon requesting — nay, demanding — that he be given a championship belt. After the jump: Badass middle-aged man Ian Freeman’s three-round domination of Paul Cahoon.

A couple of weeks ago, we lamented the fact that Hong Man Choi’s mandatory army service would take him out of the fight game for three years. The good news is, he failed a physical and will be sent back home. According to the report (which is translated here):

Choi submitted medical records indicating that his pituitary adenoma may compress his optic nerve and cause visual problems. His condition was deemed problematic for basic training and was discharged. It is likely that he was determined to be unfit for the next three months.

Choi will likely get a re-examination in which case he will “re-start” his duties, get an exemption, or be sent home for yet another physical at a later date, depending on the results…

As of now, it is quite likely that Choi may get an exemption since he has a clear reason and has all the necessary documents. Also, it has been reported that his vision has been deteriorating since last year. In an interview with My Daily, Choi was quoted as saying “I couldn’t see the right hook when I fought Mighty Mo.”

Choi’s pituitary adenoma was revealed to the media in June of last year through the California State Athletic Commission (CSAC) right before Dynamite! USA. The CSAC deemed Choi unfit to compete and refused to issue him a fighter’s license.

Hong Man Choi was quoted as saying “It has been a fun two days and everyone was nice to me. I’m sorry that this happened.”

Man, we thought stapling papers for three years in an Army office would be bad; this optic nerve thing might end HMC’s fight career for good. Besides the fact that he was rejected in California, K-1 may not allow him to continue to fight anywhere for their organization with his visual handicap now public knowledge. Thank God he has his rap career to fall back on. And hey, if Yao Ming ever needs a stunt double…

(Robbie Lawler does his best Joe Stevenson impression at EliteXC: Unfinished Business. Photo courtesy of Esther Lin via Fightlinker.)

The California State Athletic Commission has released figures on the attendance and gate revenue for Saturday’s “Unfinished Business” show, and good Lord are they awful. Of the 8,541 seats available for the event, only 2,871 — or 33.6% — were purchased by fans. Of the remainder, 3,701 were given away as comps, and 2,023 went totally unused. The 2,871 paid tickets brought in $268,715 in revenue, which is less than the dollar value of the tickets that were given away ($340,960).

So, not only was “Unfinished Business” a ratings disappointment, but its live attendance (6,752 Stocktonites in total) was destroyed by other major MMA events held in California recently. For example…

Affliction: Banned — 14,832 total attendance, 11,242* paid (Anaheim, 7/19/08)
Strikeforce: Melendez vs. Thomson — 7,288 total, 6,750 paid (San Jose, 6/27/08)
WEC 34: Faber vs. Pulver — 12,001 total, paid figure unavailable (Sacramento, 6/1/08)
Strikeforce: Shamrock vs. Le — 15,192 total, 14,710 paid (San Jose, 3/29/08)
UFC 76 (their most recent event in California) — 13,770 total, 11,817 paid (Anaheim, 9/22/07)
* figure is debatable.

Back in May, EliteXC’s “Primetime” card — held at Newark’s Prudential Center and starring Kimbo Slice and Gina Carano — drew a respectable 8,033 spectators. EliteXC plans on holding their next CBS show in October at the 20,000-seat BankAtlantic Center in Sunrise, Florida. Of course Kimbo is going to be a big draw in his home state, but unless EliteXC likes hearing the echo of thousands of empty seats, they might want to think about scaling back a little.

We should be able to post more UFN 13 fight vids soon, but here’s a couple to tide you over. Check ‘em out quick before they’re pulled.

James Irvin vs. Houston Alexander (fight starts at the 2:02 mark)

Nate Diaz vs. Kurt Pellegrino (fight starts at 1:37; “look fuckers, no hands” choke starts at 9:44)

(You can have the t-shirt or your hand. You can’t have both.)

When beloved CagePotato commenter Old, Bald and Irish won a CP "Hall of Fame" t-shirt for his epic Affliction/car-wreck-related comment last week, it was kind of a big moment, as OB&I tries so damn hard on all our little contests, but rarely wins anything. (Sorry, buddy.) Anyway, we’ve grown quite familiar with Irish. His real name is Michael, and we know where he lives. Which is why we were taken aback when we got this e-mail in our feedback account on Saturday from a dude named Greg Kelly (street # and town name have been redacted):

Yeah, peace bro. Surprisingly, this is the first time that someone has e-mailed us trying to claim a contest prize that they didn’t actually win. You’d think it happens all the time, but it doesn’t. So Greg, consider yourself banished from the site. Caption contests live and die by the honor system, and the dishonorable shall not be tolerated. Please use this post’s comment section to tell Greg what a doucheface he is.

Seriously — posing as Old, Bald and Irish? Of all people…

(Don’t uncork the champagne bottles just yet…)

Sam Caplan at FiveOuncesofPain says an anonymous source let the cat out of the bag regarding the big-time UFC announcement that we’ve been frothing about for the last couple of days. Here’s the story, as he hears it:

[T]he committee for Tourism, Arts, and Sports Development of New York recently held a vote on Wednesday to decide whether the state should regulate Mixed Martial Arts…According to the source, the bill was voted down in overwhelming fashion…

This web site has also learned that the possible legalization of Mixed Martial Arts in the state of New York was the planned announcement that UFC president Dana White had hinted at during an interview that was published on ESPN.com last week.

According to a source, White was confident that the vote was going to pass and believed he had assurances that the proposed bill would be approved by the committee for Tourism, Arts, and Sports Development of New York. However, the proposal was unexpectedly voted down for reasons that are not yet clear. In a strange turn of events, it is believed that the chair of the committee, Assemblyman Steve Englebright, who introduced the proposal, ended up voting against it…

On Monday, Masakazu Imanari lost his DEEP featherweight title to Dokonjonosuke Mishima, who had dropped his last two fights to Kenny Florian and Joe Stevenson in the UFC. I guess this negates all the nice things we’ve said about Imanari. But as you can see, Mishima’s celebratory backflip didn’t go so well. The dude should take lessons from Krazy Horse. And now that I have your attention, here’s the slickest highlight video I’ve seen all week, courtesy of MMAScraps.
(Update: Wow, if that’s playing like garbage for you too, just go here.)

Josh Koscheck posted a series of cryptic message on his Twitter page today explaining that he asked the UFC to let him have just one fight at middleweight at UFC 138 in November before he returns to compete at 170, however he didn’t name who the opponent is that he asked for.

In an interview I did with Kos a couple months ago for the latest issue of Fighters Only Magazine prior to him gaining clearance from his doctors to resume training following a serious eye injury he sustained in his last bout against UFC welterweight champ Georges St-Pierre in December, the outspoken 33-year-old expressed his desire to become a moneyweight fighter. He named two potential opponents he’s like to face if he moved up in weight, and one of them happened to be a 185′er.

“I think I still have all the tools to compete at the highest level and I believe I have the toughness necessary to be successful and to become champion one day. I want the toughest fights. I’ll fight anybody, any time, any place,” he asserted. “Anybody who wants to fight me I’ll take on. Whether it’s Bisping at 185, Tito Ortiz at 205 — bring it on. I’m a money fighter. Show me the money and I’ll fight.”

(If only either of these guys brought this much energy to their actual jobs. PicProps: MMA.pl)

The ongoing war of words between recently-retired MMA punchline Bob Sapp and FEG President (and self-proclaimed soon-to-be failed businessman) Sadaharu Tanikawa has frankly gotten too awesome to ignore any longer. Believe us, if we possibly could ignore it, we totally, totally would, but these guys are just saying too much hilarious stuff about each other not to at least get a mention. Seriously, it’s like watching the two nerdiest kids in the fourth grade slap fight in a sand box. Except, you know, with words.

You may remember that Sapp pulled out of a scheduled “modified rules” fight with Shinichi Suzukawa at K-1’s gala New Year’s Eve show last month, claiming that FEG first promised him 30 Gs for it, only to tell him he was only getting half that once he’d already made the trip to Japan. The promotion responded by saying Sapp “had lost his fighting spirit” during its broadcast and the giant former football player later indicated he was finished with MMA, but alleged it had nothing to do with his spirit. “The No. 1 problem is that K-1 is extremely broke. So is Dream …,” Sapp said. “I’m just like, ‘You know what? I’m done with all the talk about me. I’m done with them stiffing the fighters. I’m just done with it. I’ve seen too much. Start paying people to show up.’ ” Tanikawa didn’t take kindly to that, and he’s been ripping Sapp on Twitter and in interviews ever since.

(“Nemesis MMA” was the worst thing to happen to Keith Jardine since … well, whatever the last thing that happened to Keith Jardine was. PicProps: EstherLin/SharkFights)

If you were paying attention to our report on Tuesday – or following Ben Askren on Twitter, which we can only assume you absolutely are – then you had an inkling that last weekend’s independent “Nemesis MMA” show in Punta Cana, Dominican Republic was something of a disaster. Truth is, “disaster” doesn’t even begin to cover it. From accusations that Keith Jardine was greased-up in the main event to reports that paychecks started bouncing as soon as the athletes returned to the First World, it was clear from the get-go this thing was gonna be a mess. Brother, we had no idea.

MMA Weekly gets the scoop straight from Paul Buentello and Eliot Marshall, who were both “winners” at the event. Now, we know what you’re thinking: Shady independent MMA promoters stocking a show in the DR with semi-recognizable talent and promising a “four-day, all-inclusive, world-class experience in paradise?”  What could possibly go wrong, right? Well, tons of shit actually, when you don’t have an athletic commission (or anyone at all) looking after health and safety issues. Get a good look Libertarians, this is the world you want to live in …

("You ain’t my wife, but you’ll do for right now.")

The UFC has confirmed the pay-per-view lineup for their super-stacked UFC 121 event, which goes down October 23rd at the Honda Center in Anaheim. Tune in and you will see Brock Lesnar go for his third heavyweight belt defense against Cain Velasquez, Jake Shields attempt to leapfrog Jon Fitch on the welterweight ladder by smashing Martin Kampmann, and Tito Ortiz try to take advantage of Matt Hamill’s deafness-related lack of equilibrium. (Science!) Plus: Sanchez vs. Thiago, Schuab vs. Gonzaga, TUF 11 winner Court McGee stuffed onto the prelims and more. Tickets go on sale to the general public this Saturday at noon PT.

Fun fact, from the UFC press release: If Lesnar defeats Velasquez, he will tie Tim Sylvia for the most heavyweight title defenses, and will set the record for most consecutive heavyweight title defenses. And now, the lineup…

Main Card
Brock Lesnar vs. Cain Velasquez (for heavyweight title)
Martin Kampmann vs. Jake Shields (WW)
Paulo Thiago vs. Diego Sanchez (WW)
Tito Ortiz vs. Matt Hamill (LHW)
Brendan Schaub vs. Gabriel Gonzaga (HW)

(Jason "Mayhem" Miller, shown here with two of the countless enemies he’s made over the years.)

Losing your middleweight champ to the UFC after his contract runs out? Disaster. But Strikeforce plans to turn their lemons into lemonade with an upcoming eight-man tournament that will crown a new champion in their deepest division. Here’s what King Coker had to say about the MWGP he’ll put together if Jake Shields splits the scene:

A two-event tournament means that the semi-finals and finals could potentially be held on the same night, Japan-style. And looking at that lineup, we see a lot of potential for sick matchups and serious grudge-settling. Think about it…

(Uh-oh, looks like someone ate that half a sandwich in the office refrigerator that Bobby was saving for lunch. He wrote his name on it for a reason, people.)

When we had trouble finding betting odds for the Bobby Lashley-Wes Sims fight for our Strikeforce: Miami edition of the Gambling Enabler, we initially chalked it up to the fact that the bout was a late addition.  Maybe we were right, or maybe it just took a little longer for oddsmakers to count this high.  A quick glance at BestFightOdds.com today reveals that Lashley is anywhere between a 12-1 and 15-1 favorite to beat Sims on Saturday night. 

Those of you who believe deep down that "certified black man" Wes Sims will take this can make a handsome profit by throwing some cheddar down on him while he’s still a 7-1 underdog.  Or you could just bury that cash and hope that a money tree grows in your backyard.  At least if that plan fails you’ll be able to dig your nest egg up again in time to bet it all on Frankie Edgar. 

So basically, what we’ve got here is another Lashley fight where he faces off against someone who was brought in to lose, this time on about a week’s notice.  Lashley still talks like since he’s only had four fights, fans shouldn’t expect him to fight anyone other than the Bob Sapps or Jason Guidas of the MMA world, but you can only have so many squash matches before it becomes a game of diminishing returns.  If Lashley wants to be taken seriously, it may be time for him to admit that his palooka punch card is just about full.

(Image courtesy of DreamOfficial.com)

Maybe the word "epic" is overused on the Internet. Certainly we’ve been guilty of using it vain when "totally sweet" would have sufficed. But I think "epic" really does apply to DREAM.9 (May 26th, Yokohama) which contains the quarterfinals of DREAM’s "Super Hulk Tournament" and Featherweight Grand Prix, as well as a great lightweight feature between Tatsuya Kawajiri and Gesias Cavalcante, and the middleweight title fight between Jason Miller and Ronaldo "Jacare" Souza.

The show will be broadcast in North America on HDNet Tuesday morning at 5 a.m. ET/2 a.m. PT, and while I’m not really down with farmer’s hours, I might have to watch this one live (and maybe even liveblog it) — especially since it’ll also represent an emotional farewell to HDNet. Right, so DREAM.9′s official fight order will be…

(Props: Fightlinker)

As promised, here’s the video of what some are calling the "submission of the decade" — Toby Imada‘s come-from-behind upset victory over Jorge Masvidal at Friday’s Bellator event via inverted mid-air triangle-choke. Enjoy it, because you may not see something like this ever again.

(This must be what Bizarro World Ross Clifton looks like.)

Forget about the Ken Shamrock-Tank Abbott bout that you’ve been positively salivating over, because Bloody Elbow says Shamrock will get beaten up by former pro wrestler Bobby Lashley at Roy Jones Jr.’s “March Badness” event in Pensacola, Florida first.  Looks like you’ll have to wait a little longer for your dream fight, MMA fan who is stuck in 1996.

Lashley has only one pro fight so far, which might be reason enough for Shamrock — who is still riding high after his victory over morbidly obese tomato can Ross Clifton — to think he has a chance.

But does he really have a shot?  Of course not.  Lashley may be a newcomer to MMA, but he was a national wrestling champion in college.  In addition to that, he’s also a superb athlete and is not really old, slow, and suffering visible effects from years of beatings.  In other words, he has several crucial advantages over Shamrock.

(It’s even sadder in slo-mo.)

From Monsters in the Morning via BloodyElbow via CagePotato reader “Adam S”:

Seth Petruzelli: My original plan was to throw a lot of push kicks, they’re called teeps…have him think that I’m going to throw ‘em to try to rush in more, and then shoot in on him, obviously…I knew I would do alright standing up with him. The promoters kinda hinted to me, and they gave me the money to stand and trade with him. They didn’t want me to take him down. Let’s just put it that way. It was worth my while to try and stand up and punch with him.

Petruzelli says he was paid “in the six-figure range” for accepting the main event fight on Saturday and will be re-negotiating his contract for his next EliteXC fights. I bet the next time EliteXC offers a guy money to stand and trade with Kimbo, they’ll be a little clearer about the objective: Don’t shoot for a takedown, but also don’t knock him out with an off-balance jab. (You’d think that would be implied.) We definitely suggest listening to the rest of the “Monsters” interview, where Seth describes the moment where he knew he had Kimbo beat, what he said to the athletic commissioner afterwards, and the chances of Kimbo/Seth II (and Tito/Seth I). Entertaining stuff…

(Trunchface: When a troll face meets a punch-face, the result is always legendary.) 

You see, this is what we love about “old school” fighters like Mauricio Rua and Antonio Rogerio Nogueira. They don’t give a shit about rankings (probably because they know the UFC’s official ones are shit anyways), the easiest path to a title shot, or sponsorship deals with anyone not named Praetorian. They only care about scores, and specifically, settling them. It is for this reason alone that Lil’ Nog — the same one currently riding a two-fight win streak including a win over Rashad Evans at UFC 156 earlier this month — recently stated an interest in a rematch with Rua — the same one who has gone loss-win in his past 7 contests and is on the heels of a UD loss to Alexander Gustafsson in December. That is of course, according to UFC President Dana White:

(Shogun vs Evans) is a fight, yeah. That is a fight that could happen, yeah. But I keep hearing this thing that Nogueira and Shogun want to fight each other, they want to do the rematch. I don’t know how that makes sense for Nogueira, but that’s what they want, that’s what I’m hearing they want. Far be it from me to not give somebody what they want. 

Let’s just act like that last sentence never happened for a moment and focus on the potential matchup at hand. Rua and Nogueira first met back at PRIDE FC – Critical Countdown 2005, where Rua emerged victorious by way of unanimous decision in a fight that became an instant classic amongst fans of the sport. The rematch (and a TUF: Brazil coaching gig) was first suggested by Nog back in August, and while circumstances have surely changed in the time since, we can’t imagine there would be a lot of resistance to the idea from a fan’s point of view. Clearly White agrees, but how about you Taters?

Now break out your foam fingers and chug some Yunker Fanti, because we’ve thrown a full video of Rua/Nogueira 1 after the jump to get you amped for the all but inevitable rematch. PRIDE NEVA DIE!!!

(Only in a freakshow match like this would you hear an audience member ask “What’s he waiting for?” after approximately 4 seconds of fighting.) 

Yesterday, the world was introduced to a man by the name of Nick Capes (which based on his fighting style, we can only assume is a pseudonym for Greg “Ranger” Stott), a hapless marshmallow of a man who somehow found himself in a boxing match against former Atlanta Falcons defensive end Ray Edwards. The results were hilarious, not in the Mark Kerr vs. Ranger Stott kind of way, but in the Dan Severn vs. Shannon Ritch kind of way. Capes flopped is what we’re saying. He flopped hard. Capes flopped so hard, in fact, that he has since been indefinitely suspended from boxing in North Dakota, which should give him plenty of time to continue pushing the fighting style of RIP on methed out tweekers near and far. As TwinCities.com reports:

Combative Sports Commissioner Al Jaeger says a video review of the fight between Nicholas Capes and a much larger Ray Edwards clearly shows Capes was not hit before he dropped to the canvas. Officials are continuing to investigate.

By “continuing to investigate,” we assume they mean “emailing this video to their entire contacts list with a subject line reading Re: Fatty takes a tumble LOLZ.“

(“I’LL ASK YOU ONE MORE TIME, JAY, WHO TATTOOED THIS AFFLICTION SHIRT TO YOUR BACK?!”) 

If the first month is any indication, 2013 is going to be a good year for MMA. There hasn’t been a significant injury in weeks (sorry Patricky), title fights are almost starting to make sense, and on top of it all, the UFC’s primetime ratings are slowly beginning their climb out of the abyss. Throw in the fact that Bruce Buffer’s upcoming autobiography is all but a shoe-in for a Pulitzer and we are left with little to complain about. It feels…good.

So before we jinx ourselves, let’s get to the great news regarding the preliminary portion of UFC 156, which was able to pull in record numbers during its run on FX last Saturday despite the fact that it featured several debuting fighters and not a lot of name power. As MMAFighting’s Dave Meltzer reports:

Saturday’s UFC 156 prelims drew 1,897,000 viewers, topping the previous UFC on FX record of 1,860,000 viewers set two weeks earlier for the Vitor Belfort vs. Michael Bisping card from Sao Paulo, Brazil.

The number was a huge increase from the prelims on FX on Jan. 26 before the FOX network special from Chicago’s United Center which did 1,208,000 viewers.

The largest previous audience on FX for prelims before a big show came on July 7 when theUFC 148 prelims did 1.8 million viewers. But that was to be expected, since there was more interest in UFC on that day with the Anderson Silva vs. Chael Sonnen middleweight title rematch than any day over the past two years. 

After almost ten minutes of research, we have determined that there are only two real explanations for the UFC’s sudden viewership jump:

(Photographic proof that EVERYTHING in India ends in choreographed dance.)

Their name is Super Fight League, and when you click on the main page of their website, you will immediately be serenaded by a theme song that can only be described as…divine. Seriously, it’s like Eddie Van Halen, Lil Jon, and Sean Paul drank paint thinner, blew coke, and played Star Fox until this song came out. THAT’S HOW EPIC IT IS.

Anyhow, aside from being India’s very first MMA promotion, Super Fight League will also go down in MMA history as the first promotion to sign an exclusive deal with Youtube. Awesome, right? You want to know what’s even more awesome? Their very first card will be headlined by a heavyweight clash between James Thompson and Bob Sapp. Yes, that Bob Sapp.

Check out the awesome promo after the jump.

“Who you calling “Jabba”, bitch?” (PicProps: Tussle Fight Gear)

With so many deserving fighters flying under the radar these days, that this particular match up got any attention at all may be a crime, but who are we if not willing accomplices? Amanda Lucas, adopted daughter of Star Wars & Indiana Jones creator George Lucas, was set to climb into the cage for the third time tonight at Freestyle Cage Fighting 46. Lucas had spent the past year away from competition sharpening up her skills; unfortunately, her opponent was a little less diligent in her preparation.

At last night’s weigh-ins, Martin hit the scales at an astounding 13lbs over the 165lb limit. Yeah, 13. We’ve heard countless excuses for missing weight over the years, some even of the ovarian-variety, but showing up 13lbs over the limit is almost inconceivable. To be fair, we don’t know what Martin’s reason may be and we don’t know the circumstances surrounding this fiasco, but we’re cool with that. Martin gave it two more “efforts”, but could only drop down to 173lbs. Lucas, outweighed by some ten pounds, withdrew from the bout.

(Does this look like the face of a man who is pumped for Wrestlemania? PicProps: BloodyElbow)

Right on schedule, the Internets are in full-on meltdown mode this Monday morning concerning all things Brock Lesnar. Lesnar fans who talked him up as an unstoppable juggernaut as late as Friday afternoon are now backtracking, suddenly focusing more on his inexperience than his otherworldly physical prowess. Cain Velasquez supporters are getting their gloat on, as well they should, after Velasquez put a king sized beating on Lesnar at UFC 121. We blogging scumbags are attacking the former champ’s striking skills, his game plan and his training camp. Many of us are wondering aloud about Lesnar’s future in the sport, how he’ll rebound from this and what in the bejeezus is going to happen to our precious heavyweight rankings now.

For his part, UFC President Dana White is insinuating that the whitetail deer population of southwestern Minnesota might be a bit inflated come spring, since he believes Lesnar will cancel much of his planned time off in order to get back in the gym and back in the Octagon ASAP. Then there’s this goddamned Undertaker thing, which is threatening to take on a life of its own.

Props: caposa. More after the jump…

(While the ‘Just Bleed’ tribute thrills the hardcore fans on the internet, it’s one of those jokes that doesn’t go over as well with the professional hot chick crowd.)

The thing to know about Tom Lawlor is that he’s just like you. Well, maybe not exactly like you. For one thing, he can fight. For another, he’s sitting on a $100,000 bonus check for Submission of the Night at UFC 100, where he choked C.B. Dollaway unconscious after one of the year’s most memorable entrances. But in other respects, he’s not so different from you.

He’s an MMA nerd who spends way too much time on the internet, posting in forums and pouring over the latest articles. He makes all the same inside jokes, loves all the same viral sensations, and has a great sense of humor, so much so that it’s difficult to get any real information out of him. While talking with him about his upcoming fight against Aaron Simpson on Monday night’s Fight Night card on Spike TV, I eventually gave up trying. It was still a fun conversation though, which is more than I can say for a lot of interviews with pro fighters.

CagePotato.com: So I was looking at your UFC.com profile today, just for fun, and I see you’re practiced in the art of Baboo Baby. Tell me, what’s that all about?

Lawlor: Baboo Baby is a deadly art that I have been granted a rank in. The master is a man by the name of Jack Skellington. It’s somewhere between being a very traditional martial art and being the most untraditional martial art on the planet. I’ve been training very hard in this style. It’s a close cousin to Harold Howard’s old style where he infused jiu-jitsu with karate. It’s also similar to the style that was brought about by Ranger Stott with RIP.

(Demonstrating one half of his stand-and-bang plan.)

If you’re an MMA fan with access to the internet (and the fact that you’re reading this means you’re at least one of those things), chances are you’ve heard about Marcus Davis’ big plans for his fight with Chris Lytle at UFC 93 this Saturday.  Davis, or as he’s known around here, Mr. Hand Grenade, has made no secret of the fact that he’d like this bout to be contested on the feet.  He also thinks it has the potential to be one of the all-time great battles of MMA, which is why he’s been trying to make it happen for months now.

At long last, he got his wish, and in this candid talk he tells us all about how this situation came about and why he thinks you’re going to like what you see when he steps into the Octagon with Chris Lytle this Saturday.

CagePotato.com: Okay, Marcus. I think a lot of people are wondering about some of the stuff you’ve said about this “gentlemen’s agreement” between you and Chris to stand and fight on the feet.  Where did that come from, and do you really think you’ll both stick to it?

I think everybody is a little confused on this.  There wasn’t any real agreement.  It’s just that we’ve both talked about wanting to have exciting fights and bang it out.  I think people are assuming it’s an agreement.  Basically, Chris Lytle and I started talking, I think after he fought Thiago Alves, about how if we ever fought each other it would be a great fight.  When the time came that he was going to fight Paul Taylor and I was going to fight Paul Kelly, we were talking about calling each other out in order to make it happen.  I was going to call him out because I thought I was fighting after him.  Then they switched it so I was fighting before him, so it wouldn’t have made much sense for me to call him out, in case he lost.  

But what made it all snowball was that I said, jokingly, in a couple of interviews, ‘the first guy to take it to the ground is a pussy.’  It was supposed to be a joke, but I think a lot of people took it seriously.  The way I’m looking at it, though, it’s an MMA fight.  It takes place wherever it takes place.  I’m sure we’re going to hit the ground at some point.  But the big thing is we’re planning on putting on our best performance and bringing out the best in the other guy.  

It’s like a dance.  If one person is a great dancer and the other person isn’t, it’s going to look like crap.  But if you have two people who know what they’re doing, that can be a beautiful thing to watch.  That’s what I’m hoping for.

Building it up in this way, don’t you think that puts added pressure on you guys to fight a specific type of fight, trying for this legendary outcome?