(Props: MMA Videos)

Is there such thing as elusive judo?  We may get to find out if this video is any indication of where Japanese judo gold medalist Satoshi Ishii is learning the MMA game from.  He even pulls a nice little fireman’s carry on Lyoto Machida at 2:53 in.  You know it’s slick when Machida is smiling even as he hits the mat.

Say this for Ishii, he’s taking his entrance into MMA very seriously and is getting some of the best training he can find.  First he worked out with Randy Couture, and now Machida.  Next maybe he goes to Greg Jackson’s and starts flipping people on their heads.  Better soak it up while everyone still thinks of you as that harmless, nice Japanese guy from the Olympics.  

After the jump, a study in how YouTube’s “Related Videos” feature gets weird in a hurry.

(Photo courtesy of Scott Hirano. For more from this gallery, click here.)

By Anton Gurevich

A week away from his encounter with Fedor Emelianenko at Fight For Japan: Genki Desu Ka Omisoka 2011, it seems like not many people are giving 2008 Olympic Games Gold Medalist Satoshi Ishii a chance to get his hand raised at the Saitama Super Arena. After all, Ishii will be entering just his seventh professional MMA bout, as he currently holds a record of 4-1-1.

However, Ishii’s career decisions speak for themselves. The 25-year-old Judo phenom left his comfort zone in Japan to pursue a full-time Mixed Martial Arts career in the U.S. Ishii become a student of the game by training under Muay Thai extraordinaire Ed Buckley, and touring between some of the most famous gyms on the west coast.

Ishii could easily be labeled one of the most high-profile martial artists currently competing in the sport. The fight with Fedor could serve as a turning point for the decorated Judoka, who has set himself a clear goal of becoming one of the best MMA fighters on the planet. It’s an opportunity Satoshi Ishii will take full advantage of, especially when fighting on his home turf in Japan.

We had an opportunity to speak to Satoshi Ishii, who shared his thoughts about the December 31st date with “The Last Emperor,” and his preparations coming up to the fight…

Read the interview with Ishii on Lowkick.blitzcorner.com

(What? Was Zuluzinho not ready for a rematch?) 

Fresh off a unanimous decision victory over Jeff Monson that snapped the only multiple fight losing streak of his career, word has just broke that Fedor Emelianenko will be fighting in Japan for the first time since his armbar victory over Hong Man Choi at Yarennoka – New Years Eve 2007. As luck would have it, “The Last Emperor” will be fighting on New Years Eve once again, this time under the DREAM banner and against 2008 Olympic gold medal winning Judo practitioner Satoshi Ishii.

Not exactly the freak show bout that Japan (and Fedor) have been known to dabble in, but to call it a mismatch would be somewhat of an understatement. After winning the gold medal in Beijing, China over three years ago, Ishii has built up a 4-1-1 MMA record, with wins over the likes of Ikuhisa Minowa and former K1 great Jerome Le Banner, but has not fought since his draw with pill popper and occasional fighter Paulo Filho back in September. Ishii’s lone loss came in his MMA debut at the hands of fellow Judoka gold medalist Hidehiko Yoshida.

(“Well, maybe *you* can’t tell the difference between 18k gold and 14k gold…”)

Though he was slated to face Scott Lighty in a featured light-heavyweight matchup at this Friday’s Strikeforce Challengers event at the Stockton Arena in Sad City, Olympic gold-medalist judoka Satoshi Ishii has been forced to withdraw from the fight. Strikeforce announced this morning that due to the recent natural disasters in Japan, Ishii was unable to acquire a visa permitting him to leave his homeland in time for the event. Stepping in for him will be Lorenz Larkin, an undefeated knockout-artist who is currently 9-0 as a pro, following a 7-0 amateur career.

The Stockton Challengers show — headlined by a lightweight meeting between Justin Wilcox and Rodrigo Damm — would have been Ishii’s first MMA appearance in the United States. After losing his MMA debut in a decision to Hidehiko Yoshida on New Year’s Eve 2009, Ishii went 4-0 in 2010, with notable victories over Ikuhisa Minowa and Jerome Le Banner. Maybe when his visa issues are sorted out, a judoka vs. judoka bout between Ishii and fellow Strikeforce light-heavyweight Rhadi Ferguson is in order.

(Come on, man — think of all the good times you had here! Photo courtesy of daylife.com)

UPDATE, 12:35 p.m. ET: Cro Cop is official for UFC 99.

The UFC’s quest for foreign expansion is hitting some spike-strips, with two big-name fighters potentially slipping out of their grasp. First off, despite his blog-post enthusiasm that led everyone to believe he’d be returning to the Octagon at UFC 99, Mirko "Cro Cop" Filipovic still hasn’t signed a contract with the UFC. As Dave Meltzer explains:

(Yeah, they are less impressive in real life.)

From MMAFighting.com:

I initially doubted that the UFC would have much interest in Ishii, since he’s an MMA newbie with very little name recognition in the States (and a hefty price tag, probably). The only way this would make sense is if the UFC was planning on expanding into Japan soon, as some are suggesting. Even then it might not be worth it, unless they intend to put on as many shows in Japan as they do in the U.K. now. But Ishii is undeterred; he wants to fight in the Octagon so badly that he may be leaving an obscene amount of cash on the table in his home country. 

(You call it: happy or sad?)

According to a new article translated into English for us by Robert from betwwx.com, Judo olympic gold medalist Satoshi Ishii says he is definitely getting into MMA, and he wants to fight Mirko “Cro Cop” Filipovic and…Hong Man Choi?

Japan’s Olympic gold medallist Satoshi Ishii has quit judo to enter mixed martials arts. His ultimate goal is to fight the likes of Mirko Cro Cop and Hong Man Choi also known as the “Techno Goliath”.

The Reuters articles mistakenly nicknames Mirko Filipovic as the ‘Terminator’, although the Croatian fighter has not fought under that name but is widely known among fans as ‘Cro Cop’.

‘This is a new chapter in my life and I’ll have to now start from scratch or with a white belt. Mixed Martials Arts has the words best fighters and I wanted to face many of them even before I won my Judo gold medal . I want to get myself in good shape and want to face the best as soon as possible. There’s no need to hide. That’s is my goal.” Said the 21 year old Ishii.

Let’s say you’re Cro Cop and you hear this. Are you psyched for a potential big money fight with Japan’s most recent judo hero? Or are you blinded with rage at being mentioned alongside Hong Man Choi, as if the two of you are interchangeable? I have to think it’s the second one, but Cro Cop has baffled me before.

(Size advantage goes to Ishii; shitty tattoo advantage is all Filho.)

A bout between former WEC middleweight champion Paulo Filho and Olympic judo gold medalist Satoshi Ishii, presumably at light heavyweight, is being targeted for Amazon Forest Combat’s inaugural event in Manaus-Amazonas, Brazil on September 14. According to a report by TATAME, the promotion is also in talks with several notable ex-Zuffa fighters including Marcus Davis, Nate Marquardt, Patrick Cote and Ronys Torres.

(Props: MMA Fanhouse)

Dana White has been a busy little beaver during his New York media tour, promoting UFC 98 and 2009 Undisputed with a series of television and live appearances. Here are his video blogs from the last two days. Monday’s features the requisite Pinkberry visit, some fan meet-and-greet at a GameStop in Times Square, and Dana getting punked by a sidewalk chalk-artist at the very end. Yesterday, he did Opie and Anthony and ESPN First Take, pressed flesh at Nasdaq, and taught Jimmy Fallon how to punch. The vlog cuts off after that, but we’re guessing he went back to his hotel room, sat down in the bathtub, and cried for about a half-hour.

Fox Sports Net aired their Fedor: The Baddest Man on the Planet documentary special last night, in which "the mystique of Fedor is uncovered," and "the secrets of the world’s most dominant fighter are finally revealed." And it was pretty damn entertaining, actually. Maybe not quite on the level of UFC Primetime (second episode airs tonight!), but we do get some insight into Emelianenko’s state of mind before and during fights, his shadowy training camp in Stary Oskol, his sado-masochistic bath-house routine, and his uniquely awesome way of trash-talking during grappling sessions. ("The crazy is coming. The crazy is going to happen now. It’s coming. Very soon.") Parts 1 and 2 are above, and parts 3-6 can be found at YouTube.com/DirtyFedor.

Below: This Japanese TV clip shows Olympic judo gold-medalist Satoshi Ishii visiting Las Vegas, where he steps into the Octagon for the first time, tries on the UFC’s "open-finga-glovos," takes some standup tips from Stephan Bonnar, and gives Randy Couture quite a workout.  

(Props: Nightmare of Battle)

After the jump: Frank Mir has something very important to say.

(Video courtesy YouTube/Middleeasy)

Remember when Gegard Mousasi was on a 15-fight win streak, was knocking and tapping fools out left, right and center and everyone was calling him the next Fedor? That was awesome.

Then King Mo came along, laid Mousasi on his back and peppered him with more non-committal shots to the face than Jenna Jameson took in her heyday for the majority of their 25-minute fight.

While he isn’t necessarily a better fighter, Mo, who is regarded by anyone who has spoken at length with him about the sport as an MMA savant, executed the perfect game plan to beat Mousasi. In his next fight against Rafael Cavalcante...not so much.

(Bro grabs!)

There was a time during 2009 when Satoshi Ishii was one of the more sought-after free agents in mixed martial arts, but after a spate of failed contract negotiations and inactivity stalled his momentum the Olympic Judo gold medalist’s MMA career has so far been typified more by taking pictures with the sport’s biggest stars rather than actually fighting them.

With just two bouts under his belt to date (one of them a decision loss to Hidehiko Yoshida), Ishii’s career hit another speed bump this weekend  when he was disqualified during an exhibition match at something called X-1 World Events “Nations Collide” in Hawaii after he failed to heed the referee’s instructions to stop punching opponent Myles Tynanes.

("And when can I meet famous retard Kevin James?" Props to BloodyElbow.)

A few more stories coming out of the Octagon this weekend…

— The UFC has begun exclusive contract negotiations with Olympic gold-medalist judoka Satoshi Ishii, who attended Saturday’s event. Said Dana White: "Satoshi Ishii has the potential to be very successful in mixed martial arts…we look forward to helping him with his training, his career, and his eventual debut in a professional fight." Ishii reportedly planned on starting his MMA training with Fedor Emelianenko’s Red Devil team in St. Petersburg, Russia, but White talked him out of it, and encouraged him to train at Xtreme Couture in Las Vegas. White also suggested that the 238-pound Ishii drop down to light-heavyweight for his MMA debut.

— Following the kind-of-late stoppage of the Evans/Griffin fight, and the ludicrously late stoppage of the Kongo/Al-Turk fight, the UFC may no longer be requiring the services of referee Steve Mazzagatti.

— Though MMA fans are already clamoring for Evans vs. Jackson, Rampage would rather settle some business with Forrest Griffin first.

— At UFC 92′s post-event press conference, Dana White confirmed that Diego Sanchez vs. Joe Stevenson would indeed be the main event of UFC 95 (February 21st, London). Sorry, mates.

— Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira is open to a fight against Randy Couture. “It would be a nice match,” Nogueira said. "He lost his last fight, but he is still a legend." Likewise, buddy.

— The UFC is looking to return to Chicago in July.

— Of all the fighters who have left the UFC, the only one that Dana White regrets losing is Andrei Arlovski. Could he be welcomed back if this Affliction thing doesn’t pan out?

(Carneiro vs. Anderson Silva, from way back in the day. Check out the easy-as-pie sweep at the 5:38 mark. Then the finish soon after.)

Jiu-jitsu ace Roan Carneiro’s services are no longer required in the UFC, reports Five Ounces of Pain.  He was let go after an unremarkable five-fight stint, going 2-3 and losing two straight – one of which was a submission loss to Kevin Burns, of all people – before being ousted.  He’s already found a new home with the World Cagefighting Alliance, where he’ll face Paul “Herpes Neck” Bradley from season seven of The Ultimate Fighter.  Yeah, you remember him.

– Affliction VP Tom Atencio still thinks Golden Boy is his friend.  He told CBS Sportsline that he wasn’t concerned about them promoting an event just thirty-five miles away and on the same night as his, saying: “We’ll be competing a little bit. It is what it is. Golden Boy is our partner, and we’re making sure that both events are known.”  By that reasoning, Affliction and the UFC, which is only reairing event on the same night, must be total BFF’s!

– Japanese judo gold medalist Satoshi Ishii says he would rather flee to America to fight under the Zuffa banner than stay and compete in Sengoku or Dream, like he lead us to believe he would.  Much to the disappointment of the Japanese MMA scene, which is also looking at the potential departure of Yoshihiro Akiyama for greener pastures, Ishii says he doesn’t even mind if he has to start in the WEC. 

(Someone should tell him they don’t do the bigger weight classes in the WEC anymore.  Just make sure you’re not wearing a gi when you tell him that, because he will flip you for real).

Mirko Cro Cop VS Shinichi Suzukawa

DREAM 18 wasn’t the only Japanese MMA event on New Year’s Eve. Inoki Bom-Ba-Ye 2012 – a hybrid MMA/Pro-wrestling card – also provided the MMA community with some freak show goodness. We’ve been putting off coverage of this event until videos surfaced because frankly, when the main event features a post-prime Cro Cop vs. a disgraced sumo wrestler turned professional wrestler, well, yeah, this event can wait a few days.

The main event, Cro Cop vs. Suzukawa, proved that no matter how far past his prime he is, Cro Cop can still submit a clueless jabroni making his MMA debut. In other words, it was a decent freak show fight that played out exactly as it should have. It just wouldn’t be New Year’s Eve without a freak show fight, now would it?

The co-main event displayed Japanese judoka Satoshi Ishii fighting against what was apparently Tim Sylvia. Despite committing himself to the most explosive workout program in all of MMA, The Maine-iac showed up looking like he hasn’t even thought about training since his Arlovski fight in September, and did it ever show. Ishii took the fight by unanimous decision.

Video after the jump.

(Props: serpreg via MiddleEasy)

The Glorious Sweater of Absolute Victory was more than a beloved Internet meme — it was a JoBu-esque talisman, embodying Fedor Emelianenko‘s supernatural talent as a fighter, and leading to his eventual downfall when he turned his back on it. Fedor first began wearing the GSoAV non-stop in 2009, then abruptly stopped before his losing streak in Strikeforce, which is too eerie to be a coincidence. Though he tried to appease the sweater by wearing it again before his July 2011 fight against Dan Henderson, it spitefully withheld its powers, teaching Fedor a painful but valuable lesson about loyalty.

But after another extended hiatus, the GSoAV re-appeared (magically?) before Fedor’s first-round knockout of Satoshi Ishii last December. It’s back again in this new footage, which proves that Fedor isn’t leaving his upcoming fight against Pedro Rizzo to chance.

(Penny for your thoughts, Brett.)

Heavy.com is reporting that the planned heavyweight bout between Brett Rogers and Tim Sylvia has been scrapped because “Da’ Grim” was denied a travel visa to Japan due to his recent dust-up with his wife that landed him behind bars and on trial for domestic assault.

(Main event, huh? Interesting choice.)

Just a friendly reminder that the inaugural Amazon Forest Combat show is tonight and for those of you who want to watch it, we’ll have a stream Thursday afternoon. Sorry for the inconvenience, but we’re told that there was a scheduling issue and even the networks in Brazil who were to carry the event live are not airing it until tomorrow and this weekend, respectively.

Fair warning: Chael Sonnen tells us the Internet quality in Brazil is slightly better than dial-up, so the quality may be a bit less than 720p.

Anyway, the card for this show is a good one and definitely worth watching.  It should be live around 4:00 pm ET Thursday, we’re told.

(The appropriately epic poster for Dynamite!! 2009.)

Members of FEG and World Victory Road held a press conference earlier today in Japan to discuss their collaborative effort for New Year’s Eve, Dynamite!! 2009: The Power of Courage. A batch of fights were announced, and the lineup (via Nightmare of Battle) is looking like this so far…

MMA Heavyweight Feature:
Satoshi Ishii vs. Hidehiko Yoshida

Super Hulk Tournament Final:
Ikuhisa "Minowaman" Minowa vs. Rameau Thierry Sokoudjou

DREAM vs. Sengoku Raiden Championship:
Norifumi “Kid” Yamamoto vs. Masanori Kanehara
Hiroyuki Takaya vs. Michihiro Omigawa
Hideo Tokoro vs. Marlon Sandro
Hayato “Mach” Sakurai vs. Akihiro Gono
Katsuyori Shibata vs. Hiroshi Izumi
Alistair Overeem vs. Kazuyuki Fujita

Spoilers after the jump, along with the Fedor/Ishii fight, the Sylvia/Le Banner “fight,” and the bantamweight tournament final match between Bibiano Fernandes and Antonio Banuelos.

(Dave Kaplan cleans up on "The Singing Bee’s" Girl Power Night.  No joke.  The money line: "You’re making me nervous, Fatone!" Thanks to reader bpd for this.)

- Inside MMA previews Arlovski/Fedor. (MMA Scraps)

- Wagnney Fabiano in no hurry to get WEC belt. (Tatame)

- Phil Baroni wants back in the UFC.  Good luck, bro. (Five Ounces of Pain)

- Joe Rogan’s "Fight For The Troops" rant is pretty right on. (Fightlinker)

- Satoshi Ishii celebrates his birthday. (Suki MMA)

- Hong Man Choi not worried about midget Cro Cop. (Fighters Only)

- Dodgeball, Xtreme Couture style. (Xtreme Couture)

- If alcohol labels were more realistic. (Holy Taco)

- Goodbye Sparks, you will be missed. (Wall Street Fighter)

- The weirdest Jeff Goldblum moments are really weird. (Screen Junkies)

- Cop hits deer at 75 mph, and it goes flying. (Nothing Toxic)

It’s official: Satoshi Ishii is a dead man walking. Don’t call it a comeback, but Fedor Emelianenko was spotted on his return flight home from Holland donning none other than the Glorious Sweater of Absolute Victory, or as MMA Mania calls it, The Ultimate Sweater of Destruction. I’m not going to lie to you, Potato Nation, I had to paste that name directly from their article, because as I tried to type it, it was as if some otherworldly force took over my body, choked me within an inch of my life, and then forced me to smash the ice cream cone I was eating into my face. Weird.

The sweater, which was retired amidst an undercover attempt by the Russian government to assassinate “The Last Emperor” and use its powers to bring on a new Ice Age, has been the sole factor in Emelianenko’s recent three fight skid, which saw him submitted by Fabricio Werdum before being TKO’ed by Antonio Silva and Dan Henderson. After a recent, secret shift in the Russian power paradigm, Emelianenko told CagePotato in an exclusive and possibly fake interview that he feels safe to wear the sweater again, and looks forward to going on another 30 fight win streak that will culminate in a “two man enter, one man leaves” match against Dan Severn.

(In Brazilian culture, the “Easter Bunny” is two men, one small and one large, covered in body hair and scars. / Photo via SporTV)

It’s not Rolles Gracie, it’s not Bobby Lashley, and it’s not Todd Duffee. According to a tweet sent out today by M-1 Global Director of Operations Evgeni Kogan, Fedor Emelianenko‘s opponent at the June 21st M-1 event at the Ice Palace in St. Petersburg will instead be three-time UFC heavyweight title contender Pedro Rizzo. Please, try to control your excitement.

A free-agent who’s been out of the elite circuit of MMA competition for years, Rizzo didn’t compete at all last year, partly due to an arm injury. Still, he’s riding a three-fight win streak dating back to September 2009, with victories over Jeff Monson, Gary Goodridge, and Ken Shamrock. Meanwhile, Fedor picked-up back-to-back wins over Monson and Satoshi Ishii late last year, which followed his disastrous 1-3 run in Strikeforce.

On one hand, Rizzo feels like a hand-picked opponent for Fedor. On the other hand, there aren’t many better options outside of the Zuffa umbrella. Anybody looking forward to this one?

(Chick vs. dude grappling match ends badly for the dude. Props: nate53202)

Some selected highlights from our friends around the MMA blogosphere…

- Strikeforce ‘Melendez vs. Masvidal’ Fighter Salaries (MMA Convert)

- The Outlaw and the Losing Streak (MMA Fighting)

- Top 10 Biggest MMA Upsets in 2011 (The Fight Nerd)

- Meet the Flyweights: Interview With Debuting UFC 125-Pounder Ian McCall (MMA Mania)

- Photo Gallery: Satoshi Ishii Trains at Black House for Fedor Emelianenko Fight (Lowkick.Blitzcorner.com)

- Jordan Breen: People Wouldn’t Intensely Hate Jon Jones if He Was White (Fight Opinion)

- Josh Barnett Booked for Pro Wrestling Match in Dream’s NYE Event (5th Round)

- Why There Will Never Be a Dominant UFC Heavyweight Champion (BleacherReport.com/MMA)

- Cooking With Tim Kennedy: Killer Texas Chili (MiddleEasy)

- Update on Zuffa vs. New York Lawsuit (MMA Payout)

- Fourth Time’s a Charm: Kenny Florian Back at Lightweight Seeking UFC Gold (FightLine)

- Jorge Masvidal Fought With an Injured Right Hand Against Gilbert Melendez (Five Ounces of Pain)

Genki Sudo vs. Royler Gracie, from K-1 Romanex 5/22/2004

When we last checked in on Royler Gracie, the forty five year old Brazilian was looking for an opponent for Amazon Forest Combat’s inaugural event on September 14^th. Initially, we reported that Royler turned down an ADCC bout with Eddie Bravo in hopes of getting him to fight at this event. Later, it was revealed that Hideo Tokoro was initially targeted as an opponent for Royler Gracie, but that fight fell through because Tokoro will more than likely be fighting at a Dream September event. Now, as Sherdog reported earlier today, former Shooto champion Masakatsu Ueda has stepped up to fight Royler Gracie in what will be his final MMA bout.

Royler Gracie is 5-4-1 in his professional MMA career. He hasn’t fought since losing to Hideo Tokoro at K-1 Premium 2006 Dynamite!! on New Year’s Eve, 2006. Ueda, meanwhile, is 13-1-2 and riding a three fight win streak. He most recently knocked out Rumina Sato with a body kick on July 18^th. If you’re a believer in “momentum” and/or “cage rust”, then Ueda is easily the early favorite.

(Video courtesy of YouTube/MMACanadaTV)

- The end of Strikeforce? (SI)

-The Electric Dock Ellis Acid Test: An Attempt To Recreate His Drug-Addled No-Hitter, On Xbox (DeadSpin)

- Paulo Filho training for Satoshi Ishii (Tatame)

- ‘We’ are the champions: in defense of referring to your sports team in the first person (Clutch.MTV)

- 5 UFC fighters who could squash ‘The Spider’ (BleacherReport)

- Dana White talks UFC 133, Overeem and his meeting with Vince McMahon (MMAFighting)

- Calgary Commission finds no fault in ref who stopped Couture-Bird fight way too late (MMAJunkie)

- Comic-Con 2011: Spielberg says Jurassic Park 4 is underway (ScreenJunkies)

- MMA Agent Malki Kawa talks shop (CageWriter)

- The hottest chicks from comic book flicks (MadeMan)

- Overeem declares boxing superior to MMA (FiveKnuckles)

- Bobby Lashley out of next week’s Titan FC event (FiveOuncesofPain)

(Video courtesy of YouTube/UFC)

Some selected highlights from our friends around the MMA blogosphere. E-mail feedback@cagepotato.com for details on how your site can join the MMA Link Club…

- Barry vs. Kongo to co-headline UFC on Versus 4 with Marquardt vs. Johnson (5thRound)

- Jake Ellenberger talks Shields vs. St-Pierre; predicts GSP will win via ‘jab and yawn’ (LowKick)

- Can we buy Couture’s post-UFC 129 retirement plans? (Versus MMA Beat)

- Erik Paulson talks about the time he had to hold a gun to a guy’s penis (MiddleEasy)

- Fight! Magazine’s MMA rankings: Melendez moves to #1 (Fight! Magazine)

- Dana White quashes Royce Gracie at UFC Rio rumors (MMA Fighting)

- Brock: ‘I don’t know if you ever get used to taking punches’ (MMA Convert)

- Jon Fitch needs shoulder surgery, will be out 4-6 months (Bleacher Report/MMA)

- Judo gold medalist Satoshi Ishii steps away from MMA to focus on competing in the 2016 Olympics for the U.S. (Five Ounces of Pain)

(Video courtesy YouTube/DREAM)

If you’re a diehard MMA fan or you get home from the bars tonight and are looking for something to watch, remember that DREAM 16 is on HDNet at 2:00 am ET tomorrow morning. 

Besides the Sakuraba-Miller fight that is advertised above as if it were a Japanese game show, only with worse music, there are some solid match-ups that haven’t gotten a lot of media attention, including Mousasi-Mizuno, Hansen-Tokoro, Miyata-Inoue and Takaya-Beebe.

(Aoki has been on the internet all day trying to figure out who these Sengoku jokers are. It would probably help if he didn’t keep pausing every five minutes to shop for new tights on Amazon.)

Instead of splitting the Japanese MMA vote with two separate New Year’s Eve events, Sengoku and Dream have decided to not only combine their efforts, but to pit several of their fighters against one another in a Sengoku vs. Dream battle royal.  Of course, because they’re still a little over a month away from the event, the organizers haven’t seen fit to nail down the complete fight card yet.  That’s just not how they do, but chances are that the final lineup will be co-headlined by the K-1 bout between Masato Kobayashi and Andy Souwer, along with Hidehiko Yoshida taking on MMA newcomer Satoshi Ishii in the battle of the gold medalist judokas.

Aside from that, it’s a toss up.  Several cross-promotional fights are expected, but far from finalized.  If you were hoping to see Dream lightweight champ Shinya Aoki take on Sengoku lightweight champ Mizuto Hirota, well, first you’ll need to explain to Aoki exactly who Hirota is:

"Who’s the champion now? Because I don’t know,” [Aoki] said. “Right now, I’m number one. I feel that I’m [at the] top now, and if I fight him, I fight him. I didn’t say I wanted to fight him, and no one knows who he is, so if we fight … well, I’ll have to think about it.”
 

Oh, Shinya.  You crazy guy.  Allow us to provide a little primer for you after the jump. 

(Alistair Overeem vs. Todd Duffee. Fight starts at the 3:41 mark and ends 19 seconds later. Good night Ireeeene.)

Full results from today’s New Year’s Eve event in Saitama, Japan, are after the jump, along with a few must-see videos courtesy of ZP420MMA. Note: Bob Sapp apparently backed out of his IGF slap-fight-rules bout with Shinichi Suzukawa at the last minute.