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Shane Carwin Is Not Impressed With Your Nickname Suggestions

(Just when you’re hypnotized by the look of peace and harmony in his eyes, he whips around and lops your head clean off.)

Rising UFC heavyweight prospect Shane Carwin chose a nickname for himself, no thanks to you people.  After hundreds of suggestions from you and from members of his official fan community, Carwin went with “The Engineer” as his official nickname.  It makes sense, since he is actually an engineer, which you would know if you’d read Neal Taflinger’s awesome cover story on him in Fight! Magazine.  But since we thought you people had some decent ideas we wanted to get Carwin’s reaction to some of our favorites, just to see where the Potato Nation went wrong.  Here’s what he had to say.

Shane “Juggernaut” Carwin: I’m too simple a guy for something like that.

Shane “Darwin” Carwin: I go to church on Sunday, so I’m not sure how that would go over.

Shane “Pain Train” Carwin: Too much rhyming.

Shane “The One-Hit Wonder” Carwin: That’s actually my coach’s nickname, so I can’t take that.

Shane “Spartan” Carwin: That was my high school mascot.

Shane “Hulk Hands” Carwin: What?

So “The Engineer” it is.  Carwin also told us that he’s still healing from the broken nose he suffered before knocking out Gabriel Gonzaga, but will obviously have his eye on the Brock Lesnar/Frank Mir heavyweight title fight at UFC 100.  And who does he think will win that one?

“I could see that fight going either way, honestly.  Frank’s well-rounded, a really talented fighter, as he showed when he fought Nogueira.  Lesnar’s a big, powerful guy with great wrestling skills.  I wouldn’t be surprised to see either of them win it.”

Okay, but who would he rather face, assuming he got the next title shot?

“Either one.  Frank’s been the champ before, been in the sport for a long time and has a great name, so it would be a great opportunity to fight him.  But if Lesnar and I fought, that might be the two biggest guys they’ve ever had in there throwing bombs at one another.  They might have to reinforce the Octagon for that one.”

Cagepotato Comments

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Anonymous- April 28, 2009 at 6:00 am
shut the fuck you gay cunts, stop talking about religion, carwin didn't day he did not believe in darwinism, just that because of the fact he goes to church he doesn't think that nickname would be well recieved by the people there...
The Kid- April 25, 2009 at 12:20 pm
Shane "midnight meat train" Carwin
Anonymous- April 25, 2009 at 10:01 am
Shane " The Mauler" Carwin should have been the one he picked. The reason being is that he destroys and maul's everyone of his victims in a quick and devastating fashion. So in an essence he mauls his victims into an unconscious state!!!
GSP- April 25, 2009 at 6:46 am
let the record show that i am not impressed
nippletwist- April 25, 2009 at 6:46 am
word on the street is, GSP is not impressed either
TBEAR- April 25, 2009 at 5:34 am
I liked Shane "the white explosive athlete" Carwin......or Shane "nickname" Carwin.......or Shane "take this for breaking my nose" Carwin.
newotnek- April 24, 2009 at 9:52 pm
"Shit Fists" was still my favorite and Carwins a pussy for not choosing that one
The Apprentice- April 24, 2009 at 8:27 pm
"Insane" Shane Carwin or Shane "Scar" can then just shorten either to "Inshane" or "Scarwin" to give him that pivotal marketing appeal!
Anonymess- April 24, 2009 at 7:45 pm
where the fuck did shane go to school? dumbass
Anonymess- April 24, 2009 at 7:42 pm
shane 'piltdown man' carwin
Anonymess- April 24, 2009 at 7:41 pm
shane 'knucklewalker' carwein
Anonymess- April 24, 2009 at 7:34 pm
shane 'mulva' carwin
Anonymess- April 24, 2009 at 7:32 pm
shane 'flat earth' carwin
Anonymess- April 24, 2009 at 7:29 pm
he doesn't believe in evolution? what a fucking tool. what a retard. no wonder he gets hit in the face for a living. let's hope he sustains some more damage. FUCKING IDIOT. religion is a pox of civilized society.
IA Nightmare- April 24, 2009 at 7:18 pm
Shane Carnage Carwin. That dude leaves nothing but carnage. Great fighter!
browning- April 24, 2009 at 7:01 pm
Shane no stain just a little dog poo carwin!!!!!!..?
Potantate- April 24, 2009 at 6:52 pm
Shane hard wind carwin!!!
Bob Loblaw- April 24, 2009 at 6:34 pm
Carwin is the last guy who needs a nickname. He's the guy who makes all of his opponents quake in their boots, wondering if they can withstand the onslaught of having that steamroller coming at them. I say let the press assign him a nickname, as it should be. Too many of the fighters in the UFC, especially the newbies, come in with a prefab nickname.
Anonymous- April 24, 2009 at 5:55 pm
Shane "Bible Thumper" Carwin The "Bibles" are his fists! Rejoice!
Dante- April 24, 2009 at 5:47 pm
Mr. Blonde, you just became the Uncle Joey of Cage Potato with you witty banter. Good job chief...

MrBlonde- April 24, 2009 at 5:43 pm
rokabee thank you so much now I understand what your mother means when she says to pummel her vag or anus.
rokabee- April 24, 2009 at 5:40 pm

The Engineer?

U can atleast pick a badass one if your gonna pick it.

Shane "Pummel" Carwin

Definition of pummel u say?

The act of beating, as in with fists.

Kimbo's Bread- April 24, 2009 at 5:02 pm
Shane "It's a damn Shame" Car Win.

Acrocerid- April 24, 2009 at 4:50 pm
Shane "The Fear-Gineer" Carwin?
Anonymous- April 24, 2009 at 4:44 pm
"Sugar" Shane Carwin? sounds "sweet"