After sifting through over 250 entries for our latest caption contest — most of them absolutely awful — we found nine that stood out from the rest of the pack. Check ‘em out after the jump, and vote for your favorite in the poll on the right; the winners will be announced on Monday morning. If you haven’t been nominated, don’t freak out: You can still obtain a Glorious Sweater of Absolute Victory shirt from 62Gear.com for just $21.95. Check out all of Six Deuce’s lovely designs right here, and big ups to everybody who participated.
Nick420Diaz: Fedor practices for his big New Years Eve showdown with Jeff Dunham.
Goat (1): caption haiku…
Fedor and Monkey
Raping Your Stupid Face, Man
A Winning Team
Ajax: Now who’s stupid for spending $20 playing ring toss?
Goat (2): As John witnessed the brutality in front of him, he could only stand there, mouth agape, wearing his painfully lame gray shirt and black jacket.
hotsaucemonster: You may leave alive, I will grant you that privilege, but the nose, she belongs to me now.
steampunk22: While Jim Henson’s sweater had brought him much greatness and strength, Fedor still found himself at mercy of its original owner, the sweater guiding his hands in the darkest of ways, cursed for all eternity.
LetMeStickItInYourRua: That monkey is some sort of bionic creature. It doesn’t poo in its hand and throw it at you instead Fedor crawls out and punches you to death.
LuketheDuke: In Mother Russia, monkey spanks YOU.
chilldude: "You criticize this sweater? I have people writing captions just so they can have a shirt that LOOKS like this sweater!"
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Comments
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:03
Aren't Haiku's supposed to be 5-7-5 not 5-7-4!!
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:06
*edit* --- nevermind ----
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:06
***
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:12
Pfft!
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:12
fedor- how smells me spooge mop
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:13
That haiku is perfect. Absolutely perfect. 5-7-5 is more of a guideline, as there is no established strict standard. The original Japanese Haikus defined what a syllable is differently than we do. The accepted standard today is that it keeps to fewer than 17 syllables, which this does. This is also the funniest one, by far. It may set a bad precedent and all comments in a caption contest will be in the form of a Haiku from now on. Or at least all comments about Fedor. Something tells me Fedor would approve.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:18
these contests never fail to disappoint.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:33
Wow. Terrible. If that's the best of them, I should get one for this comment.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:33
I thought they were decent considering the photo is horrible for a caption contest.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:45
Ben and Ben, you don't actually read the comments, do you? This is one of those "randomly selected entries" contests, yes?
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:57
There's only so many "hand up a monkey's ass" jokes you can make.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 08:58
Boggsnort=Goat That's not even close to being the funniest. HotSauceMonster's is by far the funniest.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 09:14
I have not problem with any of them except for the Mother Russia one, CP you're better than that. Seriously? Anytime I've ever seen a picture of Fedor someone says "In Mother Russia ---- followed by whatever Fedor is doing. "in mother russia shirt wears you," let the hilarity ensue. Its a say day. That's like giving a shirt away in a Nick Diaz caption contest where someone says he's thinking about a bongoplata or a weedoplata. Steampunks and Ajax's where pretty good though. On a side note Fuck the Oregon State Beavers in their gay asses the Ducks are going to fucking kill them.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 09:15
Big ups, ajax.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 09:53
those were all really funny.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 09:56
How can you even be thinking about voting for Ajax over Goat(1)? That Haiku is the only one that made me laugh out loud.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 10:00
Ajax for the win. Can we envoke a rule that if you enter something that has already been entered you have to buy everyone else a shirt? I would have a new wardrobe from all the "monkey spanks you" attempts.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 10:03
a say ajax or chilldude.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 10:34
Yea I really didn't expect to make it to the finals with that one. Portland mma: Sorry if I couldn't placate your comment elitist mentality.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 10:37
I prefer purist, but either way apology accepted. Now if I could just get these post tears of anger to dry off my shirt.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 10:41
After I win this t-shirt, I'm going to try out for TUF's super-fly weight season and run the board against fellow malnourished white guys and asians.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 10:45
I thought my Family Guy reference was the best...I guess not...you suck CP!
Thu, 12/03/09 - 11:09
LukeTheDuke should get it for the old school Simpsons reference.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 11:25
That's not even haiku, it's senryu.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 11:35
It's at times like these that I can totally empathize with the "Turd Sandwich vs Giant Douche" episode of South Park.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 12:11
Give it to the new guy. I like him and his name is so clever. I mean stick it in your rua. Now that some original stuff. But I might be a little biased about it all. lol
Thu, 12/03/09 - 12:35
These crappy caption contests are getting old. How about a pick em contest, where there is clearly one winner and so we don't have comments that aren't even remotely funny.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 02:52
Oh, the HORROR....
Thu, 12/03/09 - 02:56
I thought my "It's ALL OVER!" one was the funniest.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 03:08
I'm just happy I found a way to mention Jim Henson on an MMA site. :P
Thu, 12/03/09 - 03:10
On a related note, I have never been able to vote on any of the polls on this site, although I think I only tried to vote in the last 2 or 3. I get a "Validation Error, please contact site admin, etc". Kind of odd.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 04:06
All funny, but I liked Luke and Ajax's the best.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 04:08
@ steampunk, are you running a popup/ad blocker?
Thu, 12/03/09 - 06:13
What browser are you using? When I use Google Chrome it says the same thing but when I use good old internet explorer it doesn't. So that may be your problem.
Thu, 12/03/09 - 06:37
I was using Safari, which I think had the popup blocket turned on. I switched to Mozilla though to test if there was a difference and I got the same error. But I just tried it again with Mozilla and now it works. I dunno. Weird.
Fri, 12/04/09 - 01:58
and over here we have fedor demonstrating dreams new glove.
Fri, 12/04/09 - 08:22
Ajax easily but both of the goats were pretty good too
Fri, 12/04/09 - 02:36
They're all unfunny crap. Burn the shirt as a sacrifice and pray Fedor doesn't find this page and armbar everyone in the CP basement.
Sun, 02/13/11 - 10:08
[...] I’m sure Fedor will retreat to Stary Oskol, put on a comfy sweater and just go about his life. There’s nothing that says you have to seek the spotlight – [...]
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