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Steve ‘Child Porn of Sports’ Hickey’s Rebuttal to CagePotato’s Seth Falvo Is About as Wrongheaded as You’d Think It Would Be


(The Twitter avatar of a rational man capable of leading the nation, obviously. Props to Fightlinker for the find.) 

Background: Like many of you, I was very upset when Ben Goldstein published a post about South Dakota State Representative Steve Hickey’s ridiculous tirade against MMA, but probably not for the same reasons that you may have been. As a Christian, I found it odd that a pastor would not only write things about death that I felt contradicted the messages contained in the Bible, but also cite Forrest Gump while doing so. It’s bad enough for a pastor to write that he can’t muster up sympathy for a person who has died because said person was just asking for it through his hobbies - I cringe picturing Hickey’s stance on rape if it’s anything like his stance on death - but to essentially say that a dim-witted, fictional Hollywood character has more wisdom than the person who your entire religion is built around is just completely unacceptable.

And that’s when I made the mistake of emailing Hickey, telling him that while I couldn’t care less what his opinion on MMA is, his stance on death is disgusting to me. For whatever reason, I was expecting a completely rational response. Instead, Hickey published an “Open Letter to Christian MMA fans” that I can’t help but feel is sort-of directed at me, where he accuses me of writing the piece that I not only told him was written by Ben Goldstein, but also was signed with Ben’s initials. Today I’m here to respond to that open letter. If this isn’t of any interest to you, move along, there’s nothing to see here.

****************************************************************

Dear Representative Steve Hickey,

It came as a big surprise to me this morning when I woke up to read on other MMA news sites that you have apparently published part of an email I had sent you. I don’t regret anything I’ve written, but I did find it odd that you took my email as a defense of MMA. As I wrote in the email, not only couldn’t I care less about how you feel about the sport, but also, I didn’t even write the article that you have attributed to me. I also found it pretty odd that you didn’t chose to publish that part, but I digress.

I’m not here to point out the factual inaccuracies in your posts about MMA. I’m not here to debate you. I’m also not here to encourage you to watch a sport you have no interest in. I’ve already seen dozens of people try to do all three of those things on the comments sections of your website, only to watch you essentially claim that knowing absolutely nothing about the sport helps you see it for what it really is (?). I may be a lowly writer for CagePotato, but even I have better things to do with my time than argue with a guy who genuinely seems to believe that his ignorance towards a topic makes him the only trustworthy source of information on it.

Rather, I am here to tell you that if you are serious about getting MMA banned, you may want to consider stepping down from your unofficial position as the anti-MMA community’s mouthpiece.

Up until now, the only reason that anyone has paid attention to your rant has been your comparison of the sport to child pornography. In your mind, you didn’t receive the reaction you wanted because other people were too shocked to focus on the point you were making. In reality, other people dismissed the comparison because, believe it or not, they can tell that you didn’t even have a point when you made it. You’ve flip-flopped on what the comparison is supposed to mean - a telling sign in itself that you made it without any real point in mind – going from ”MMA is the worst sport in terms of injuries and violence” (which it clearly is not, as anyone who knows who Lawrence Taylor and Joe Theismann are would know) to “Anyone who understands addiction knows that it starts off with MMA then progresses to murder!” (Because obviously, porn addiction starts with innocent stuff like child porn then works its way to buying a Girls Gone Wild DVD, right?).

Making such an over-the-top comparison does nothing but turn away people who may otherwise agree with you, and serves no purpose other than turning your own argument into a gigantic self-parody. Perhaps if you are serious about getting MMA banned, you should allow more rational people to lead the argument. Who knows, maybe a businessman who has actually researched whether or not MMA legalization affects the economy or a doctor who has researched the long term negative health effects of being an MMA fighter may be taken much more seriously than a pastor who tries to use scare tactics and shock value to make his case.

Sincerely Yours,

Seth Falvo

P.S. If you really want answers to the questions you have posed at Christian MMA fans and fighters, Fightlinker has already published a rebuttal, and I personally think it’s fantastic.

P.P.S. While I appreciate your offer of a free book, if you did as much research while writing it as you did while being South Dakota’s unofficial voice of the anti-MMA community, I must decline your offer. I have no use for a doorstop, paperweight, or firewood, and frankly, I bought more toilet paper today at Sam’s Club than I’ll ever go through.

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masterbaitntackle- March 5, 2013 at 6:29 am
Fuck Steve Hickey in the anus with Eazy-E's dick, a 18-inch-thorn covered poison tipped strap-on, and that lead pipe Karma told crooner to fuck himself with......
macreadysshack- March 2, 2013 at 6:09 pm
How do I know a sport is too brutal? I know it when I see it. I judge books by their cover because if I read the goddamn things, I might just find that they have something incredibly important to say and then how could I possibly hate them?
painvelasquez- March 1, 2013 at 10:30 am
Lol politics.
hitekredneck- March 1, 2013 at 4:30 am
Seth, gotta say that while most of the time I find your writing a bit dry, you did a fantastic job with this douche of a politikian. My hat's off to you.
cman- March 1, 2013 at 2:00 am
Just a reminder, as we have entered the fray as a site, these squabbles have the world ( South Dakota) watching. Not sounding like what they expect you to would be prudent.
TheCrooner- March 1, 2013 at 12:40 am
And I typed Ben Goldstein when I had meant Steve Hickey. Obviously. You're letter was great. It was a joke. Joke. Jesus Christ...
TheCrooner- March 1, 2013 at 12:32 am
Did I mention it was a joke....... and why is it that a thread on a MMA forum is turning inton the battleground for religious debate? Haha why aren't you jumping down the throats of the people who said fuck Jesus or that Jesus uses brass nuckles etc? Aren't those comments just as, if not more pointless and offensive to the argument/discussion at hand? And yes, I'm sure you're lord would be very happy with you defending him by telling someone to fuck themelves with a lead pipe. Very Christian of you. This is pointless and you missed the only meaning behind my original post. There was none. An ill thought out attempt at a joke and not an attempt for me to get on a soap box.
bledcarrot- March 2, 2013 at 2:32 pm
Nice backpedal bro! Talking about jesus with brass knuckles is always relevant because it has comedic content, unlike your 'jokes'. If the least you can learn from this exchange is that you haven't to now fully grasped the concept of a 'joke', then I think we've made good progress.
KarmaAteMyCat- February 28, 2013 at 8:38 pm
Crooner, I'm not really sure why you are attacking BG but you should go fuck yourself with a pipe. See I voiced my opinion hope you enjoy it :)
-
Great read Seth. I fucking love it.

PS Crooner, use a Lead pipe so you get poisoning lead poisoning.

PPS Go fuck yourself Crooner.
TheCrooner- February 28, 2013 at 7:21 pm
Of course I understood his argument and agree with it. I was making an attemt at a joke and it was obviously lost on you. Should I have beat a dead horse and explained why I agreed? I think, like the rest of you, that Ben Goldstein is a misinformed asshole. I agree we may not share the same comedic sensibility but as a very well read and well informed athesit and former Christian I reserve the right to have an opinion and voice it when it comes to matters of faith and especially Christian based faiths. Jesus is bullshit. Shut up.
bledcarrot- February 28, 2013 at 9:38 pm
Your opinion was irrelevant to what was going on, that's the whole point! As an informed and well read atheist, shut the fuck up and stop pushing your opinions into conversations where they aren't relevant, you're making us all look bad :) Thanks.
SethF- February 28, 2013 at 8:31 pm
Are you sure you understood it, because Ben Goldstein didn't write this...
TheCrooner- February 28, 2013 at 6:08 pm
You lost me at "I'm a Christian"
bledcarrot- February 28, 2013 at 6:31 pm
TheCrooner: That's because you appear to be an idiot. If you can't follow a rational argument because of a person's unreleated religious beliefs then you belong fairly and squarely in the 'irrational' camp with Mr Hickey. Enjoy screaming and making retarded faces at each other.
cman- February 28, 2013 at 6:04 pm


CMan


As you apparently have no knowledge of this sport, yet seem to think that makes you the expert, i have to deduce you are little more than an attention whore, which is the child porn of mass media. Honestly, this is exactly what makes us conservatives look incredibly bad. Opinion based off absolutley nothing and no desire to educate yourself. Very disappointed minister
KungfuJaysus- February 28, 2013 at 5:57 pm
I think Jesus would be more into using brass knuckles. I don't know why but whenever I have thought of Jesus in a fist fight I've just always pictured him using them.
WhiteBoyFrank- February 28, 2013 at 4:55 pm
This is why I love you guys. There are too many assholes out there that believe making stupid comparisons such as MMA and child porn will actually draw positive attention to their cause. WAR Falvo!!
Get Off Me- February 28, 2013 at 4:07 pm
Respect for trying to get through to this guy Seth.
All this is simply feeding Hickey's agenda, he'll reference his blog this week in his sunday service and spin it like "mmmm..look at all the hateful, spiteful fans/participants of the sport who responded to me..baa". The only way to really deal with these types is send them mma's american jesus(if this happens in Brazil, we send Vitor). We gotta start a "Serve Hickey Some Country Breakfast" fund...All the mma community needs to do is raise enough funds to send Matt Hughes over to Hickey's church on Sunday morning. Let Hickey try to call Matt Hughes out in front of the church and see how that goes.
Tristan- February 28, 2013 at 3:05 pm
Went a head and posted a more wordy response to this guy on his blog, but here's my main issues:
1. Paul frequently refers to fighting, in the context of athletic competition, not war, and has no problem with it.
2. Jacob wrestles with God at Peniel, and is blessed, not condemned.
3. Jesus is NOT a pacifist hippie moral teacher, at one point he cracked dudes with a whip, which strikes me at first glance as more serious than an elbow.
4. His view of the Sermon of the Mount is just wrong, and shows shameful ignorance of the Bible for a pastor.
Mr_Misanthropy- February 28, 2013 at 2:59 pm
I think Steve's just trying to make a lot of noise to distract suspicious people close to him from his random anonymous airport restroom stall rendezvous... that certainly have no connection to either butt sex or child pornography.
Alan K- February 28, 2013 at 2:58 pm
Can I have the book? I haven't gone shopping for toilet paper yet.
El Guapo- February 28, 2013 at 2:22 pm
Jesus would elbow the kimchee out of Joe San! That much I know. Prob'ly throw a few 'bows at War Machine to straigten him out. Might elbow Vitor in the mouth for name dropping. I'm sure I'm missing a few(hundred)..
Dr Vendo- February 28, 2013 at 2:22 pm
Having just read sir Hickey's blog, I have just one thing to say:

Is there anyway we can get some "Who Would Jesus Elbow In The Face?" shirts?
danomite- February 28, 2013 at 2:18 pm
@fried - your logic is impregnable
agentsmith- February 28, 2013 at 2:14 pm
*proud*
shatterproof- February 28, 2013 at 2:07 pm
fuck jesus.
Mr_Misanthropy- February 28, 2013 at 3:00 pm
Ewww... gross. That's necrophilia.
Fried Taco- February 28, 2013 at 1:41 pm
@danomite - boxers don't fight boxes, just like cage fighters don't fight cages...
Fried Taco- February 28, 2013 at 1:40 pm
I posted my comments on his blog:

http://stevehickey.wordpress.com/2013/02/26/an-open-letter-to-christian-mma-fans-and-fighters/#comment-1802
danomite- February 28, 2013 at 1:39 pm
Can we get a cagepotato ban on the term "cage fighter"? It's just a term used by ignorant journalists or morons like this hickey clown to elicit an emotional response. They don't fight cages and not all MMA fights are fought in a cage. Boxers aren't called "ring boxers" so fighters shouldn't be called "cage fighters".
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