(Kurt Pellegrino proudly shows off his new battle wound, a hole where his teeth broke through his mouth.)
Well, at least it was free. Tonight’s Ultimate Fight Night broadcast was marked by two savagely boring three-rounders, including the main event, where Mike Swick avoided takedown attempts for 15 minutes en route to a decision victory. “Quick” it was not; if anything, the fight proved that the emaciated-looking Swick may have been a lot more powerful at 185. First, the quick results for the televised card:
(Lightweights) Nate Diaz def. Alvin Robinson via triangle choke submission at 3:39 of the first round
(Lightweights) Thiago Tavares def. Michihiro Omigawa via unanimous decision
(Middleweights) Patrick Cote def. Drew McFedries via TKO (punches) at 1:44 of the first round
(Lightweights) Kurt Pellegrino def. Alberto Crane via TKO (punches) at 1:55 of the second round
(Welterweights) Mike Swick def. Josh Burkman via majority decision
Full breakdowns after the jump…
Nate Diaz vs. Alvin Robinson
With brother Nick in his corner, Nate Diaz pushed the pace of the fight from the beginning, kicking off the action with punches and a takedown. Robinson tried for a guillotine choke on the ground, but Diaz picked him up, slammed him, and slipped out of it. Diaz then took side-control and worked for an arm-bar, but Robinson escaped it and rolled to top position. Diaz then sunk in a triangle choke from the bottom, ending the fight.
Thiago Tavares (16-1) vs. Michihiro Omigawa (4-5)
I include their records because this was the biggest mismatch in terms of fight history that I’ve ever seen in the UFC. Not that Tavares looked much better than OMG. I’m not going to spend much time summarizing this one, because it was horribly boring, and talking about it won’t make it any more interesting. But anyway, Tavares looked solid in the first round, with a carry-across-the-ring slam of OMG. He took OMG’s back twice but couldn’t finish. Tavares repeatedly tried for takedowns in round two, but only succeeded a couple times. Besides sprawling, OMG didn’t do anything notable. Round three was some lay-n’-pray bullshit; neither fighter showed anything on the ground, though Tavares was usually on top. The crowd booed heartily. OMG got caught with an upkick that drew blood. That’s about it. Tavares won by unanimous decision.
Patrick Cote vs. Drew McFedries
A quick and dirty match from two guys who love to brawl. Cote scored first with some solid punches, but McF gave it right back with hard leg kicks. After some feeling out, Cote found his distance and layed out McF with a big punch. McF turtled up and Cote rained punches down until the ref stopped it.
Kurt Pellegrino vs. Alberto Crane
Easily the best fight of the night. Crane started things up right away with a head kick that sent Pellegrino’s teeth tearing through his mouth. But once Pellegrino’s head cleared up, he dominated with striking, landing punch combos and trying to finish the fight on the ground. Even though he wasn’t the one with the big gaping hole in his face, Crane looked much worse for the wear after the first round. The fight ended in the second frame when Crane went to his back, and Pellegrino landed a huge punch from the top that made Crane cover his face in submission.
Mike Swick vs. Josh Burkman
Also boring, for the most part. Steve Mazzagatti worked overtime to break up clinches against the cage when there was a stalemate, which happened multiple times per round. The fight started with Burkman bulling Swick against the cage, where both fighters exchanged knees to the legs. Burkman scored with a nasty-looking foot-stomp and a slam, then did more cage-shoving. Burkman then attempted a backfist (which missed), a hard left hook (which landed), and a 360-degree spin kick (which missed, but it was awesome). He took the round for controlling the action. Burkman started the second with a big kick/backfist combo, but ate an even bigger head-kick from Swick, who followed it up with crisp punches. Burkman tried to take Swick down and failed repeatedly. He never gave up this strategy, even in the face of total failure; I think the judges penalized him more for his stupidity than anything else. The third round featured more stuffed takedown attempts from Burkman, insignificant striking from both guys, and boos from the crowd. The decision was 29-28/29-28/29-29 Swick, but nobody in the audience seemed to care. Swick apologized to them, Parisyan-style.
– In the undercard, Matt Wiman beat Justin Buchholz by rear-naked-choke at 2:56 of the first round, Corey Hill beat Joe Veres by TKO at 0:37 of the second round, Jeremy Stephens beat Cole Miller by TKO at 4:44 of the second round, and Gray Maynard beat Dennis Silver by unanimous decision.
– The “Mickey’s Replay” was the “Rambo Replay” for the night. Sylvester Stallone stopped by to plug Rambo, and a fight broke out in the audience while Joe Rogan was interviewing him.
– The night featured perhaps the best “Mike Goldberg is an idiot” exchange of all time…
Joe Rogan, commenting on Omigawa’s corner shouting instructions to him in Japanese: “Well, ‘ellabows,’ ‘ellabows,’ we know what that means.”
Mike Goldberg: “They are of course speaking ‘Portuguesa’.”
JR: “That’s Japanese.”
MG: “Right, I should have known that.”
JR: “And you’re the one who’s married to a Japanese chick.”
– Bob Sapp is starring in the new season of Pros vs. Joes.
– January 31st marks the debut of UFC All Access with Brock Lesnar.
– Two comedians featured in the upcoming movie Vince Vaughn’s Wild West Comedy Show stopped by and introduced a really lame clip. Joe Rogan responded with a completely ingenuine “Looks, SPECTACULAR!” It was maybe the highlight of the evening.