(Still the master of the just-woke-up-and-ready-for-murder look.)

The next stop on Aleksander Emelianenko’s “I Totally Don’t Have Hepatitis” tour is reportedly set for September 29 in South Korea, where he’ll meet Blagoi Ivanov, the Bulgarian fighter who defeated his brother Fedor in the World Combat Sambo Championships in November.  The fight is scheduled to go down in the newly-formed Fighter Mania Championship (or, if you prefer, the FMC) in Seoul, and the hook here is fairly obvious.  Aleks attempts to exact revenge on the man who embarrassed his brother in Sambo by beating him in MMA and maybe also infecting him with a blood-borne disease.  Ivanov is supposed to be making his MMA debut against Kazuyuki Fujita at Sengoku 8 on August 2, but apparently the FMC promoters are betting he’ll be fine to compete again less than two months later.

You have to give Ivanov this much, for a guy with zero professional experience in MMA he’s certainly diving into deep waters right away.  Fujita and Aleks Emelianenko may not be at the top of anyone’s heavyweight list, but they’re both experienced, dangerous opponents.  It seems we’ll find out in a hurry whether winning a Sambo tournament makes you an instantly credible MMA fighter.  Our guess is no, it probably doesn’t.

#9: Aleksander Emelianenko vs. James Thompson @ PRIDE 28 (10/31/04), 11 seconds

Beginning with one of the greatest face-offs in MMA history — which pitted Thompson’s theatrical fury against Aleks’s nose-picking stoicism — it was clear that this fight was going to provide an entertaining clash of styles. Thompson’s ridiculous “gong-and-dash” routine actually succeeds in catching Emelianenko off-guard, but as soon as the Grim Reaper springs back to his feet, reality sets in. Thompson proceeds to eat punch after punch until his legs give out, thus proving a very important lesson: It doesn’t matter how big you are, or how angry you look — real power comes from having tons of Russian prison tattoos.

CLICK HERE FOR THE VIDEO…

(He thought wearing the t-shirt would bring him joy, but still he felt a profound melancholy. Props: FiveOuncesofPain)

MMA Cube passes along a translation of a recent blog post by Aleksander Emelianenko, in which the ex-Red Devil fighter talks about his plans for the future, while denying rumors of his criminal history and health issues. No surprises there, really. Though this part was kind of interesting:

UFC, huh? Of course Aleksander would have to complete his three-fight U.S.-exclusive contract with Affliction first, and he’s fulfilled zero of those three fights so far. But you have to believe that Dana White would want to sign Aleks to the UFC as a thumb in the eye to his brother Fedor. Oh! Delicious! By the way, not to beat a dead horse, but Aleks could totally compete in America if it came down to it:

("It is our destiny to become an advanced race and to kill the earth in the process, only in all probability to be crushed by an even more advanced and complexed system. One day we will find other human like creatures that have noses on their arms and we will find them ugly and they will find us ugly." More from this insane rant after the jump! Photo props to HolyTaco.)

Dana Mother F$%king White on "Aleks Emelianenko Leaves Red Devil, Continues to Pretend That He Can Fight in America": Instead of hatin’ on him, ya’ll should Hepa brother out.
[Ed. note: ZING!]

El Famous Burrito on "The Potato Index: UFC 96 Aftermath": The UFC needs to get Vince from the Shamwow commercials to pitch title fights to guys:
"Ok Rampage, if you act now, and call your manager in the next 20 minutes, because we can’t do this all day, we’ll send you to Vegas to fight Rashad Evans for the title. And as a bonus we’ll throw in a fight at UFC 99, because we all know the Germans need good fights, you can even use the Shamwow to wipe down those greasy Jackson fighters. You’ll be saying wow every time."
[Ed. note: Hey, it worked for Lyoto "SlapChop" Machida.]

(Eric Pele gets ready to hand Antonio Silva his only career loss at a Bodog Fight event in December 2006. Four months later, Pele got his ass kicked by Aleks Emelianenko. You do the MMA-math.)

Though they don’t offer much in the way of sources or details, Fighters Only Magazine just published this juicy rumor:

In my opinion, both Silva and A. Emelianenko sit just outside the heavyweight top ten, so a match between them would be both exciting and meaningful. It’s been too long since either man has faced high-level competition, and the fight makes logical sense: the guy who’s exiled from the U.S. because of a steroid suspension facing the guy who’s exiled from the U.S. because of NOT HEPATITIS. (Though let’s be honest, if Aleks’s last-minute dropout from "Banned" was simply a case of late paperwork, don’t you think he’d get his shit together in time to be on the"Day of Reckoning" card?) Make it happen, Sengoku equivalent of Dana White.

Also mentioned in the Fighters Only article was Bigfoot’s recent rant on the Brazilian MMA TV show Brasil Combate regarding the marquee heavyweight in his old fight organization, EliteXC:

Ouch. I mean, he’s basically saying that Jorge freakin’ Gurgel could beat Kimbo. No word on when/where Mr. Ferguson’s next fight might be, but hey, the dude’s got enough on his plate right now.

(“Well, it was nice knowing you.” Photo courtesy of M-1 MixFight; props to BloodyElbow for the heads-up.)

M-1 is holding an M-1 Challenge event today in St. Petersburg, Russia, with Team Russia Red Devil taking on Team Korea, and Team Russia Legion facing Team Holland; the full lineup is here. Headlining the team competition will be two “superfights” that reflect the card’s nation vs. nation theme. The Legion/Holland main event will be 1-1 rookie Alexander Timanov vs. Dutch bad-boy Gilbert Yvel, while the Red Devil/Korea feature will be none other than Alexander Emelianenko vs. Spirit MC/DEEP/M-1 vet Sang Soo Lee (10-4). Soo has won four of his five fights this year, including a submission victory over Emelianenko’s Red Devil clubmate Roman Zentsov. The Korean fighter may be a step up in competition from Aleks’s last opponent, but we still think The Grim Reaper should be able to take this one relatively easily. More photos from yesterday’s weigh-ins are after the jump, courtesy of M1MixFight.com.

(Kenny is sooooo happy for you!)

This week’s Fighter caption contest — which centered on a chance encounter between The Grim Reaper, Pooty-Poot, and the Muscles from Brussels — was an overwhelming success, hauling in 440-ish entries, nearly all of which revolved around some combination of hepatitis and homoeroticism. Three of them were good enough to earn copies of Fighter, courtesy of Viking and Coach. But first, some honorable mentions:

crookshark: In spite of his fighting skills, Aleksander Emelianenko proved to be terrible at musical chairs.

Destro: Jean-Claude breathed a sigh of relief…finally, someone who was even more underdressed than he was.

Horror Fighter: Frank Dux stopped smiling when Aleks reached into his shorts and pulled out Jackson’s Harley-Davidson bandana.

Dangada Dang: Jean Claude recovering from what will go down in history as THE most awkward boner.
*previous record held by….Jean Claude Van Damme

And the winners are…

(Aleks’s sledge-hammer rears its head over the airspace of Tireland.)

When Aleksander Emelianenko was pulled from July’s Affliction: Banned card at the 11th hour, American MMA fans were robbed of seeing “The Grim Reaper” compete in the U.S. for the first time. Though rumors persisted that the CSAC blocked Aleks from fighting due to health concerns, he has always insisted that late paperwork was to blame, and that his health is good. Good enough to fight outside of the States, at least: M-1 has announced that Fedor’s younger brother will be headlining M-1 Challenge 9 against Sang Soo Lee, on November 21st at the Ice Palace in St. Petersburg, Russia.

Lee (9-4) is a Korean fighter who has fought under the SpiritMC, DEEP, MARS, and M-1 banners, and is on a three-fight win streak. His last match was a first-round triangle-choke submission of Roman Zentsov at M-1 Challenge Korea in August — and now Aleks is going in to avenge his Red Devil Sport Club homey’s loss. The Emelianenko/Lee match will be supported by fights between Team Korea and Team Russia Red Devil, and Team Russia Legion vs. Team Holland.

But before that, M-1 will make it’s first appearance on U.S. soil. Says M1MixFight.com:

On October 29th 2008, the M-1 Challenge will come to Kansas City, Missouri for the 8th installment of this new fight series. 3 time All American Wrestler of Missouri and UFC and IFL veteran Mike Whitehead (22-6) is slated to take part in the event as the superfight participant.

Whitehead had a 13-fight win streak snapped at Affliction: Banned when he dropped a decision to Renato Sobral. As for Aleksander Emelianenko, he expects to compete at Affliction’s January event, and may also “fight around Christmas-time in Japan.”

(Oh yeah, finding opponents won’t be difficult at all…)

According to a new article by Fighters Only, Aleksander Emelianenko claims that he will be returning for the next Affliction show.  He also mentions that the medical rumors surrounding his ejection from the last Affliction PPV are simply untrue.  That’s right.  Just didn’t happen.  Looks like the CSAC was mistaken(?) when one of their top execs had this to say regarding Fedor’s little:

“The one thing that I can absolutely say is that he (Emelianenko) was not and will not be cleared to fight in California. He is officially denied a license and that will stand for all of the United States of America.”

Hmm. Well that’s not encouraging. Despite the harsh words from the Golden State, Emelianenko remains optimistic.

“I am going back to the States next week to do interviews and make some film for the January event,” he said.

“But I don’t know about any opponent yet, all that is in the process of being sorted out.”

Aleks added that he may also “fight around Christmas-time in Japan.”

“But there will be no problem this time – everything is cool.”

And by cool, he means it’ll be a piece of cake to find a top level fighter who is willing to fight a potential case of Hepatitis B. This can’t bode well for Affliction, as Fedor has made a history of mandating that his brother be included in all shows he does.

(Is Jay Hieron the latest IFL refugee to be rescued by Affliction?)

Some more news and rumors emerging about Affliction’s October 11th show in Las Vegas…

— Tim Sylvia and Ben Rothwell’s agent Monte Cox has informed Five Ounces of Pain that the two Miletich big boys are unlikely to be added to “Day of Reckoning,” though they could be part of Affliction’s third event.

— According to Tom Atencio, Aleksander Emelianenko “still faces licensing problems” and will not fight at “Day of Reckoning.” Said the CSAC’s Bill Douglas: “The one thing that I can absolutely say is that he (Emelianenko) was not and will not be cleared to fight in California. He is officially denied a license and that will stand for all of the United States of America.” The reason for Emelianenko’s rejection is still unclear, though he and his camp continue to refute reports that he tested positive for Hepatitis B before “Banned.”

— According to MMA Junkie, the middleweight bout between Matt Lindland and Vitor Belfort that was slated for “Day of Reckoning” could be scratched due to a hand injury suffered by Belfort. No word yet on who might replace him on the card against Lindland.

— And finally, some good news: Junkie also reports that IFL welterweight champ Jay Hieron has been approached by Affliction and is expected to compete at their October event against an opponent to be determined later. If this is true, Hieron would be the third reigning IFL champion that Affliction has picked up, after Roy Nelson and Vladimir Matyushenko. Of the remaining three, middleweight champ Dan Miller signed with the UFC, Ryan Schultz is heading to Japan to be a part of Sengoku’s lightweight GP, and featherweight champ Wagnney Fabiano is apparently still weighing his options.

(Props: MMA Scraps)

Skip to the 2:02 mark of this video taken backstage at Affliction: Banned, where Josh Barnett gives Aleksander Emelianenko a piece of his mind. The backstory to all this starts with an interview Emelianenko did with Sherdog last month in which he claimed that Barnett was refusing a re-match with Emelianenko because he knew he’d lose. (Barnett previously defeated Emelianenko at PRIDE Total Elimination Absolute in May 2006.) The Babyface Assassin responded thusly on his MySpace blog:

Aleksander Emelianenko must have hit something mighty powerful to think I am afraid of fighting him. The only offer I ever had to fight him was the one time I did fight him…and I won. His version of asking for a rematch is doing so in a locker room after beating Bobish while I visited his brother. “Sure we can fight. Why not for free even, I mean who does this to make money right!?” He’s not an “insane” fighter. He’s just delusional.

He thinks I have been “running” from him because “I know I will lose”. He says he lost because he had a, and I am not making this up, a temperature of “98.6″. No, he doesn’t mean Celsius because his organs would have cooked off like fireworks at the kind of heat (208.6C). Go back to rapping about….fuck who cares!? Have you heard that shit!?

I was asked if I would fight him in this Affliction event and I said “In a heart beat”. Ask Tom or Todd. I will walk up to him when I see him next and let him know too. You will never beat me. I will fight you anytime and you will lose again. You can make all the excuses you want but when they’re picking up what’s left of you the proof will be for all to see…splattered all over the ring.

Awkward confrontations are even more awkward when done through an interpreter, and it seems like Aleks doesn’t know what to make of Josh’s diatribe. If there are any Russian speakers reading this, please let us know how accurately the translator is relaying Barnett’s words to Aleks. Because if the dude was like “Josh says he apologizes for ducking you, and he acknowledges your superior masculinity, and would you please shake his hand now,” we wouldn’t be that surprised.

(Props: “Kakkarotto_san” on the UG)

Check out this clip of Fedor and Aleksander Emelianenko (along with their coach, Vladimir Voronov) putting on a Sambo demonstration in Korea — and pay attention, because this might be the only time you’ll see Fedor tap in your lifetime. There’s a lot of super-slick throws from both brothers during the demo, though we don’t understand why Aleks didn’t haul off and start whaling on Fedor’s face when he had the chance.

Speaking of Aleks, the younger Emelianenko brother claims that those Hepetitis reports were false, and he was blocked from competing at Affliction only because he was late in getting his medical tests done. Well, who are you gonna believe, us or some mulleted ex-con? (It’s times like these that I truly appreciate the fact that I can hide behind a computer.)

Somewhat related: The upcoming Street Fighter IV video game will contain a new character named Abel, an MMA fighter whose outfit looks to be Sambo-influenced. Dude kind of looks like Jake O’Brien on massive amounts of steroids. According to DasGamer.com, Abel was a huge hit among nerds gamers? nerds at Comic-Con, who overwhelmingly chose to play as him rather than new female character Crimson Viper.

(“According to WebMD, I may also have shingles.”)

From MMA News via Fightlinker:

A source close to the situation spoke to MMANews.com’s Michael Moody on a condition of anonymity and explained that the blood tests came back right before Aleks and Buentello were scheduled to weigh in and that is why there was so much confusion around the stage and why the fighters did not weigh in. Gary Goodridge ended up stepping up on extremely short notice and filling in for the Russian heavyweight. The tests were positive for Hepatitis B which resulted in the CSAC cancelling the fight.

Previously: Aleks Emelianenko Might Have the Hep

I haven’t been able to get an audio confirm myself yet, but various listeners of Sherdog Radio (and fans who bumped into Paul Buentello) are passing along the word that Aleksander Emelianko’s mysterious pull from Saturday’s Affliction: Banned event may be due to a positive test for Hepatitis B.

In its acute form, the viral liver disease can be treated and will leave a person’s system within two months. In some cases the disease turns chronic and the person remains infected, running the risk of cirrhosis and liver cancer. No word yet on Emelianenko’s exact condition, though as long as he carries the virus he’ll be unable to fight in the United States, which means this could potentially be a career-ender. His last two professional fights — in July and October of 2007 — were held in Canada, which also requires blood tests for fighters, suggesting that Emelianenko acquired the disease relatively recently. Says Wikipedia:

Transmission results from exposure to infectious blood or body fluids containing blood. Possible forms of transmission include (but are not limited to) unprotected sexual contact, blood transfusions, re-use of contaminated needles & syringes [Ed. note: extensive tattooing with prison buddies?], and vertical transmission from mother to child during childbirth.

We’ll update you when we know more.

(“FU2,” available only at Triumph United.)

Good goddamn work, people: With over 150 entries, this week’s caption contest was our most popular ever, and so many of them were LOLworthy. I must say I was surprised by how many of you referenced Brad Pitt and Angelina Joile — I’m not judging, I was just a little taken aback, that’s all. Thanks again to Triumph United for making this possible. Now onto the honorable mentions…

MMA-hole: It was at that point that Fedor began to wonder…were his wife and Sakuraba more than just “friends”?

Brad: Fedor and Aleks stop by the Affliction sweat shop to thank the tailors.

Toner Breath: SPUTNIPS!! [Ed. note: I racked my brain trying to think of a good one-word pun for this picture. Toner Breath's is kind of horrible, but I give him mad props for trying. And judging from the exclamation points, he was also pretty psyched that he thought of it.]

Mike: It’s cheaper than a graphing calculator.

Erick: “Phuk An’ Run is the little-known Chinese martial art of having a kid and making your opponent raise them.”

Kimbo’s Lice: “…The stars signify that I’ll never be brought to my knees. This spiderweb on my elbow signifies that I’ve committed murder in service to the brotherhood of thieves. The grim reaper and baby on my back…you know what, I probably shouldn’t be telling you kids all this.”

And the winners are…

(“We just think this is a smarter fight for Fedor right now.”)

In a comment released through his website M1MixFight.com, Fedor Emelianenko’s manager Vadim Finkelchtein dumped a bucket of cold water directly onto the balls of everyone who started breathing heavy at yesterday’s report of an imminent Fedor/Maine-iac match:

“At the moment we can’t certainly say the bout will take place come July because the contract is not signed. However, the both parties are involved in the negotiation process and we are about to break the finishing tape although we haven’t come to an agreement concerning every detail as of yet”

Vadim, I swear to God, if you fuck this up. Of course, the details they’re still hashing out likely have to do with money and the ring-vs.-cage thing. But the thought of Vadim playing hardball in negotiations when Fedor finally has the chance to face a top-ten heavyweight outside of the UFC is completely infuriating. For all of Finkelchtein/Echteld’s efforts to protect Emelianenko’s value (i.e., ensure he doesn’t take fights he can lose), they don’t seem to realize that Fedor’s value drops further each month that he doesn’t face credible opponents. You gotta give a little, guys! For the record, MMAPayout is reporting that Emelianenko has already been offered over $2 million per fight from Affliction.

But Finkelchtein’s statement wasn’t the only interesting bit posted on M1MixFight this week…

M1Mixfight.com has posted the results of last night’s M-1 Challenge event in St. Petersburg, where all three Red Devil Sport Club headliners walked away with victories. Amar Suloev scored a first-round TKO over Jacek Buczko, Roman Zentsov won a split decision over Daniel Tabera, and Aleks Emelianenko executed Silvao Santos, who came into the fight with an MMA record of just 1-0. Video of the squash match “Superfight” is above, and full results are after the jump.

As reported here earlier, Aleksander Emelianenko will be headlining an M-1 Challenge event in St. Petersburg on April 3rd. M1MixFight now has more details on the event, revealing that “Aleksandr Emelyanenko” (whoever that is) will be facing former Brazilian pro boxer Fabio Maldonado, who has compiled a 4-1 MMA record facing nobody you’ve ever heard of. In the event’s other “superfights,” Roman Zentsov will take on equally anonymous Brazilian fighter Junior dos Santos (5-1), and Amar Suloev will take on Polish journeyman Jacek Buczko (11-3).

I know — dullsville, right? But the night’s main card might provide some patriotic excitement, as a separate Russian team will compete against a Japanese crew, and a quintet of Fins face off against Team Korea. The lineups:

Team Finland vs Team Korea
Niko Puhakka vs. Kim Jongman
Janne Tulirinta vs. Lee Yonghoon
Lucio Linhares vs. Lim Hyungyu
Toni Valtonen vs. Choi Seunghyun
Jarno Nurminen vs. Kim Jihoon

Team Russia vs Team Japan
Yuri Ivlev vs. Nakamura Daisuke
Islam Karimov vs. Hamamura Ken
Ansar Chalangov vs. Watanabe Yuta
Besike Gerinava vs. Sakuragi Yuji
Ahmed Sultanov vs. Fujii Katsuhisa

As for M-1 Global, their site is still a dead-end, and Russian MMA reports that Vadim Finkelchtein wrested control of the operation from the Americans last month. So, Mitchell Maxwell and Monte Cox should be receiving the news in another few weeks.

(Props: FiveOuncesofPain)

Might as well pop some Excedrin now, because your head will be aching after this one. According to ADCombat.com, M-1 Global is quietly setting up its first event in Russia, which will go down at St. Petersburg’s 3000-seat Ice Palace on April 3rd. One of the promotional images is above; the event will be headlined by Aleksander Emelianenko (against a yet-unnamed opponent), with M-1/PRIDE/Bodog vets Roman Zentsov and Amar Suloev also scheduled to fight (ditto). According to ADCombat’s anonymous “Russian insider”:

“With the Russian elections last weekend, advertising before [then] was next to impossible, as most attention is focused on the elections. The smaller venue may indicate a good bit of pragmatism on the part of the promoters, since they are only going to have a month or so to really push the event.”

So, by now you’re thinking, “if this is supposed to be an M-1 Global event, why does that ad clearly say M-1 Mix Fight?” Very good question. ADCombat writes:

In a previous conversation, M-1 Global’s Monte Cox confirmed that [Vadim] Finkelstein and [Apy] Echteld would be promoting events with the M-1 Global name, however the infrastructure for the show and promotion are independent of what Cox will use when M-1 Global begins to move forward in the United States.

Which explains absolutely nothing, considering that Finkelchtein isn’t promoting this event with M-1 Global’s name, but under his old Mix Fight label. According to RussianMMA.com, the St. Petersburg event will actually be the second leg of the not-very-well-publicized “M-1 Challenge” that we briefly mentioned last month. The first M-1 Challenge event was apparently held last Sunday in the Netherlands, with the Fedor-coached Russian Red Devil Sports Club competing against France’s Team Amossou, and a Netherlands team taking on a pack of Germans; shockingly, the Russians lost three out of five matches to the Frenchmen. (Don’t ask how the Netherlands/Germany matchups went down, because results weren’t published on M1MixFight.com, and news hasn’t yet trickled down to any other American MMA websites.)

RussianMMA reports that the April 3rd M-1 Challenge event will include teams from Russia, Japan, and “Europe,” and Emelianenko/Zentsov/Suloev will be competing in superfights. Checking M-1 Global’s official site, of course, confirmed nothing — it hasn’t been updated since New Year’s Eve, and you can’t expect Monte Cox to keep tabs on Vadim all the time. Especially when M-1 Global is such a disorganized pit of confusion…

In honor of today’s juicy rumor, here’s the 5/5/06 PRIDE fight between Barnett and A. Emelianenko. The ten-minute first round was an action-packed standup war, with both fighters exchanging bombs. But Barnett out-hustled Aleks in the second, taking him to the ground and working for a submission. As we’ve seen before, Aleks isn’t too awesome on his back. But we’d definitely open our wallets to witness these two go at it again…

(Business in front, death in back.)

I’m not very good with the Cyrillic alphabet, so I can’t confirm this myself. But various people are reporting that a post made yesterday on Aleksander Emelianenko’s Mixfight.ru page says Aleks will be fighting at an M-1 Global event in April. As one translation puts it:

Next bout of Aleksander Emelianenko will be held on April 11 in Chicago.

Currently we are negotiating for Aleksander’s opponent. Most likely it will be Josh Barnett.

Aleks won three bouts in 2007 by first-round stoppage, while Barnett hasn’t competed in an MMA event since his decision loss to Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira on New Year’s Eve 2006; since then, the Babyface Assassin’s name has consistently popped up as the guy with the best chance of beating Fedor Emelianenko. It doesn’t look like M-1 wants to threaten its golden calf so soon — a loss for Fedor basically negates their reason for being — but an Aleks/Barnett rematch would be the next best thing. The two fighters previously fought at PRIDE Total Elimination Absolute in May 2006, where Barnett handed Aleksander one of his three career losses, a second-round submission via keylock. Keep your fingers and toes crossed and we might get to see Aleks have his bloody revenge.

Also of interest on Aleksander’s Mixfight page is the other “23 ?????? 2008 ?” post, which appears to be a rap song recorded by the fighter. You can listen to it here. Dude kinda sounds like a Russian DMX. Anybody who can translate the lyrics gets 1000 CagePotato Gold Stars, which can be redeemed later for Camel Cash.

We’re not sure why so many people are talking about Saturday’s Gabriel Gonzaga/Fabricio Werdum fight at UFC 80 like it’s a foregone conclusion that Gonzaga’s getting his arm raised at the end of the night. Werdum is unquestionably a tough dude — he beat Gonzaga once before, back in 2003, and is only the third person (in addition to heavyweight legends Mirko “Cro Cop” Filipovic and Josh Barnett) to have defeated Aleksander Emelianenko. Here’s the Werdum/Emelianenko fight from “2H2H: PRIDE and Honor” in November 2006. We kind of think Aleks was having an off night, but Werdum dominated the entire match, putting things to a stop with a triangle choke in the first round. Werdum’s next fight was an ugly unanimous decision loss to Andrei Arlovski; here’s hoping he finds his balls again.

(The following is to be read in the voice of Don LaFontaine)

Two boys, whose lives took two very different paths…

One became a champion, adored by millions…

The other, a thief who’s never played by the rules…

But they’ll have to work together to stop a conspiracy that goes all the way to the top…

[Cut to montage soundtracked by pounding drums, with brief shots of car chases, sex scenes, and naked bathhouse knife-fights edited together faster and faster until it ends with the sound/image of a gunshot]

[Cut to shot of Aleksander Emelianenko, who holds a lit cigarette over a pool of gasoline, says "The devil never sleeps," then drops it]

Fedor Emelianenko and Aleksander Emelianenko star in…

If you’re only a casual fan of MMA, you’d be forgiven for not knowing that Fedor Emelianenko has a younger brother who is covered with Russian prison tattoos, proudly sports a mullet, and is a total badass in his own right. Though Aleksander Emelianenko has suffered notable losses to Mirko “Cro Cop” Filopovic, Josh Barnett, and Fabricio Werdum, he was one of PRIDE’s brightest stars, and takes after his brother when it comes to his aggressive attack and heavy hands. Aleksander is possibly the only MMA fighter to ever score three consecutive knockouts in fights lasting less than 30 seconds, which he did against James Thompson (12 seconds), Ricardo Morais (15 seconds), and Rene Rooze (28 seconds) in 2004-5. For a taste of the fury, check out the videos below, which show his fight against Morais, and his most recent match against Dan Bobish, which took place last month at a Hardcore Championship Fighting event in Calgary.

(Aleksander Emelianenko vs. Ricardo Morais, 4/3/05)

(Aleksander Emelianenko vs. Dan Bobish, 10/19/07)