(Cheick Kongo had never seen Deliverance before, yet in that moment, he somehow knew what was coming. Photo courtesy of Getty Images.) 

We know, we know, it’s probably not a good idea to solely base someone’s employment status with the UFC on the existence of their UFC.com profile, but speculation is the hamster that keeps the wheels of intellectual transcendance and creative spontaneity spinning here at CagePotato. That, and a shitload of coke. For the hamster.

Aaaaanyway, word was passed along this morning that longtime heavyweight contender Cheick Kongo no longer has a fighter profile on UFC.com, which can only mean one thing in today’s UFC economy: BANISHMENT.

In all honesty, anyone who noticed how much money Kongo was making even in defeat probably could’ve seen this coming. His legendary come-from-behind KO over Pat Barry aside, Kongo has looked like a shell of himself ever since Frank Mir made good on his promise to change him as a fighter at UFC 107. Once a feared striker, the Frenchman seemed like a fish who had intentionally leaped out of water in his pair of grappling-heavy snoozer decisions over Matt Mitrione and Shawn Jordan, the latter of which we dubbed the worst fight of 2012. Kongo would find no relief in his once-adored striking game, either, suffering two first round knockout losses (to Mark Hunt and Roy Nelson at UFC 144 and 159, respectively) in his past three contests.

While it would be easy to take pot shots at a guy who has subtly threatened us with physical violence before, we are going to take the high road here. So join us after the jump for look back at some of Kongo’s greatest hits.

(Even in the face of despair, Fletcher always maintains a sunny disposition. Via Colin’s Twitter account.) 

Although not completely unexpected given his current 0-2 record in the promotion, the UFC’s recent firing of TUF: Smashes lightweight runner-up Colin “Freakshow” Fletcher might represent one of the fastest post-TUF firings for a finalist in the show’s history. After dropping a tepid decision to fellow runner-up Mike Ricci at UFC 158, the news of Fletcher’s firing was passed along over the weekend via Colin’s twitter. As one would expect, “Freakshow” maintained his sunny disposition in the face of despair:

Fletcher now joins TUF 6′s Tommy Speer, TUF 8′s Vinny Magalhaes, and TUF 1′s Brad Imes as the only TUF finalists to not be given a third fight (or second post-TUF fight) in the UFC before getting axed. To be fair, Imes was eventually brought back to face Heath Herring at UFC 69, but that was before the time of The Great Deluge.

Dire times are upon us, Potato Nation. Dire times.

A video of Colin’s closest friends and family reacting to the news is after the jump. 

(Seriously, all he’s missing is a lisp and an army of lawyers to enable his incoherent conspiracy theories and he’d fit right in with the 209 crew.)  

We’re not ashamed to admit that — despite his many shortcomings both inside the ring and out — Josh Neer will always be one of our favorite fighters. Embracing an “old school,” entertainment over strategy mentality that saw him score back-to-back Fight of the Night awards during his second run in the UFC, the Iowa native has been throwing caution to the wind since 2003 and holds nearly 50 fights to his credit (including notable victories over Mac Danzig, Melvin Guillard, Duane Ludwig, and Joe Stevenson) despite his relatively young age (30).

Unfortunately, it seems as if the third time was not the charm for Neer, as he was recently listed among the UFC’s latest batch of now unemployed fighters, according to MMAOpinion:

Josh Neer (33-13-1) has been released following 3 straight losses inside the Octagon. ‘The Dentist’ a veteran of the sport, was last in action at UFC 157 where he lost a decision to Court McGee. Prior to that Neer had been finished by both Justin Edwards and Mike Pyle. 

Also among the fallen…

(In an even stranger turn of events, it was revealed that Vollkmann was actually required by law to wear that shirt whenever he was within a half mile of a playground.) 

My God how the time flies. You might not have realized it — mainly because he is the type of fighter that screams “Facebook prelims” — but outspoken Minnesotan (new band name, called it) Jacob Volkmann has been fighting for the UFC for upwards of three years now, and has collected an impressive 6-4 record in the promotion. Outside of the octagon, Volkmann gained notoriety over the years for once threatening to rip off President Obama’s arm and subsequently receiving a visit from the Secret Service, an incident he would parlay into hundreds of thousands of tens of dollars in hideous, neon orange t-shirt sales.

But unfortunately for all of us Tea Party-supporting, lay-n-pray aficionados, Volkmann’s avant-garde experiment that dared combine the gripping excitement of wrestling clinics with the comic stylings of Neil Hamburger has come to an end, at least for now. Volkmann announced earlier today via his Twitter that he has been cut by the UFC following his loss to promotional newcomer Bobby Green at UFC 156: 

(No, I’m watching *you* Jack Byrnes.) 

In a relatively surprising turn of events, 11-fight UFC veteran Aaron Simpson — whose contract expired with the promotion following his second round KO loss to Mike Pierce at UFC on FX 5 – has not been offered a new contract and has subsequently left the UFC.

The two-time All American out of Arizona announced his drop to the welterweight division in April of 2012 following a 6-3 run at middleweight and was expected to face Jon Fitch at UFC 149. Fitch was forced to bow out with a knee injury shortly thereafter and Simpson was eventually paired up with Kenny Robertson at UFC on FUEL 4, a fight he ended up winning by way of unanimous decision. In his next fight, Simpson squared off against the aforementioned perennial welterweight contender in Pierce. After dropping Pierce in the first round, Simpson would unfortunately find himself KO’d for the first time in his career* following a beautifully placed counter right hand on Pierce’s part early in the second.

But it’s not all bad news for Simpson, who has already signed a four fight deal with upstart promotion World Series of Fighting according to Ariel Helwani. And in an ironic twist of fates, Simpson will find himself competing at the promotion’s upcoming second event scheduled for March 23rd. “A-Train” will be stepping in against fellow UFC veteran Josh Burkman, who was expected to face undefeated prospect Ryan LaFlare at the event before LaFlare jumped ship to join the UFC.

Out with the old, in with the new.

*Yes, I recall that Simpson was TKO’d by Chris Leben at the TUF 11 Finale. But that was basically the Kalib Starnes of TKO’s. 

-J. Jones

This is Pedro Nobre, the TUF: Brazil alum who made his UFC debut last weekend at UFC on FX 7 against fellow Brazilian Iuri Alcantara. As you can tell from the neck brace he is sporting in the above photo, his debut did not go well. Alcantara landed a few supposedly illegal shots to the back of Nobre’s dome, and likely in an effort to make up for his poor performance during the Alessio Sakara/Patrick Cote debacle at UFC 154, referee Dan Miragliotta waved the bout off and declared it a no contest when Nobre was unable to continue.

The only problem was that 90% of the shots Alcantara landed, if not all of them, were neither illegal nor all that devastating (at least from our perspective), which prompted Dana White to post the following on Twitter:

In fact, White became so enraged by Nobre’s Oscar-worthy performance that he recently all but completely closed the door on Nobre’s future UFC aspirations.

After the jump: White’s scathing comments, along with a gif of the stoppage.

“Wait…a ham sandwich walked into a bar? How is that even possible?”

New years often mean new beginnings. For Bellator, this means cutting ties with former bantamweight champion Zach Makovsky.

Makovsky took to his Twitter account yesterday to confirm his release, tweeting “Honestly shocked but thank you for the opportunity @BellatorMMA @BjornRebney.”

A former D1 wrestler for Drexel University, Zach “Fun Size” Makovsky was the face of Bellator’s bantamweight division since the beginning, becoming the inaugural bantamweight champion at Bellator 32 with a unanimous decision victory over Ed West. A pair of non-title fights saw him knock out Chad Robichaux and choke out Ryan Roberts, improving his Bellator record to a flawless 6-0, and the future was wide open for Fun Size.

(It isn’t often that you can document the exact moment someone’s UFC career went to shit, yet here we are…) 

If you were to ask any knowledgeable fan of the sport circa 2008 what they thought of Luiz Cane, they would likely tell you that he was “one of the most underrated LHW’s in the division.” Following an unsuccessful UFC debut — which was halted when Cane accidentally struck James “Curse Watch” Irvin with an illegal knee — “Banha” absolutely blistered Jason Lambert and Rameau Sokoudjou in back-to-back contests, then scored a solid UD victory over Steve Cantwell to solidify his place as a rising contender. No, not the five fight losing streak Steve Cantwell, we’re talking about the Brian Stann TKOing, Al-Hassan arm-breaking Steve Cantwell. Cane’s chin appeared to be made of iron, platinum, unobtanium, or whatever element you’d prefer to compare it to, and combined with his solid takedown defense and devastating hands, looked to be on the fast track to a title shot.

But then, things fell apart (as they oft do in MMA) and Cane would quickly find himself fighting not just for a win, but to remain employed under the promotion in which he had once thrived.

It all started when Cane squared off against PRIDE veteran Antonio Rogerio Nogueira at UFC 106.

(The ballsiest fighter to ever step foot in the octagon. *rimshot*) 

Well, we called this one.

In his past three fights, longtime MMA veteran Dennis Hallman has made some startling (not to mention amateur) choices to say the least. After losing a bet to his friend that resulted in one of the most horrifying wardrobe malfunctions of all time against Brian Ebersole at UFC 133, Dennis showed up two and a half pounds overweight for his fight against John Makdessi at UFC 140 and was subsequently fined 20% of his purse. Luckily for him, he was able to pick up a win. Unfortunately for him, he apparently took nothing away from the close call, and showed up seven pounds overweight at yesterday’s weigh-ins. His scheduled opponent, Thiago Tavares, basically treated the situation with an “Are you serious, bro?” but was able to strike a deal with Hallman that if he could get down to only 3 pounds over the limit, the fight would be on.

Hallman was allegedly able to do so, but Tavares then asked him to cut an additional pound, at which point Hallman asked to be removed from the card and became the most recent UFC fighter to join the unemployment line.

(Alessio prays for forgiveness (and another shot) after coming up short in a snoozer against Shane Roller at UFC 148.) 

We don’t mean to disrespect a grizzled veteran of the sport like John Alessio, but simply put, if you are shocked to learn that “The Natural” was released from the UFC following an 0-2 stint in the octagon, you are either John Alessio or Lloyd Christmas. Having compiled an 0-5 lifetime record in the promotion, Alessio not only received one of the most undeserved title shots of all time under the Zuffa banner, but will live in CagePotato infamy for his placement amongst the “50 Worst Fighters in UFC History” and “The Ten Most Ironic Nicknames in MMA”. While he might be upset to learn of his placement on one of those lists, the other was more or less just a means of wasting time on our part.

Based purely on comparative success in other promotions, Alessio was/is basically the Canadian version of Jorge Santiago — a man capable of crushing 95% of the fighters he faces outside of the promotion, but one who simply couldn’t put it together under the bright lights — scoring impressive wins over fellow UFC veterans Chris Clements, War Machine, and Sean Pierson among others. Of his five losses, four came by way of unanimous decision, against superior strikers (Thiago Alves, Diego Sanchez), superior grapplers (Mark Bocek, Shane Roller) and superior superiors (Pat Militech). In an interview with MMAJunkie, Alessio discussed how his most recent loss to Roller was the hardest to swallow:

 I’m super upset. I worked so long and so hard to get back, and the UFC always puts all this pressure on you about being exciting, so I tried to change my style up to be crowd-pleasing. But then I get an opponent in my last fight, where he just chose to hold me down to win the fight, and it’s just depressing that that gets rewarded when all they talk about is exciting fights.

I really thought that I’d be spending more than a couple of months of 2012 in the UFC. I thought I’d get one more shot. I don’t know where I should go or what my options are.

Though we are sure that Alessio will find success wherever he lands, his hope of getting a win in the UFC before he retires is a long shot at best at this point in his career. The 33 year-old Xtreme Couture products record currently stands at 34-16.

A tribute to Alessio’s finest UFC moments is after the jump. 

(Gentlemen, no need to show me the door, because THERE IT IS RIGHT THERE!) 

There aren’t many fighters in the UFC who have had longer layoffs in between fights than Carlos Eduardo Rocha. Well, maybe before this summer began, that is. Fighting just three times between November of 2010 and June of 2012, Rocha’s 1-2 UFC record included a submission via kneebar win over Kris McCray and a pair of close decision losses to Jake Ellenberger at UFC 126 and most recently, Mike Pierce at UFC on FX 3. The latter fight, which you may recall was originally scored a split decision victory for Pierce rather than a UD thanks to the general incompetency of Floridians, was a relatively lackluster affair that was dominated by Pierce’s clinch and wrestling game ala Couture vs. Vera.

It might surprise you to learn that Rocha, an incredibly decorated BJJ practitioner whose only trips to the scorecards have come in the UFC, was let go following the loss. As one might understand, Rocha was none too happy to learn of this news, and quickly vented his frustrations (mainly, those relating to Pierce’s performance) when interviewed by Tatame:

I went there to fight MMA and he wants to win by points. There were 15 minutes of pure stalling This is bullshit. And UFC fires me after a fight where the guy just stood there stalling. I had good performances and even so I was cut off. I didn’t expect this.

Ah, the Nick Diaz defense. Classy move, Mr. Rocha.

More from this interview after the jump. 

(One of these days, Alice, RIGHT TO THE MOON!) 

Well this is interesting. According to BJPenn.com, former UFC welterweight contender Frank Trigg has recently been released from his HDNet contract, where he served as a commentator for such promotions as Dream and Legacy Fighting Championships. Now, we know you’re asking yourself, “How could the man behind such classic phrases as ‘OH, OH NO, OHHHH!!‘ and ‘Fedor is going to dispatch this man very quickly‘ possibly be let go as a commentator?!” At first, we would have agreed with you. Until we found out why he is being let go, that is. Mainly, the reasons appear that be beat, then cheated, on his soon to be ex-wife.

Yikes.

Here’s the alleged story:

Former UFC fighter, Frank Trigg has been relieved of his duties as a commentator for HDNet for alleged domestic violence and having an improper relationship with a co-worker.

Trigg allegedly choked his wife unconscious in front of their children back in October of 2011, and is now in the middle of a very messy divorce. 

As if that wasn’t enough, he was also found to be having an affair with a 23 year old assistant producer for HDNet. The company did not approve of the improper relationship he was having or the allegations of abuse, and in turn they have fired him from his job as a commentator.

You think that’s bad? Check out a disturbing photo of the bruises left on his wife’s throat after the 2011 incident below, first posted on TheDirty.com:

“A job, a job, my kingdom for a job!”

Let’s face it: being a professional fighter is pretty much the coolest job on earth. Even if you never get to wear gold, you can party like a rockstar and make a decent living, not to mention the benefits–oh the benefits. Few of us will ever know the pleasure of punching our coworkers in the face—in fact it’s generally frowned upon—and for that I am eternally jealous. But in the corporate world we live and die by a universally accepted code of conduct that one can follow to stay on the straight and narrow. For the professional ass-kicker, the guidelines are less concretely defined. As evidenced by an increase in pink-slips for cage-unrelated activities, mixed martial artists are not issued the same employee handbooks as their 9-5 brethren. With that in mind, here are a few axioms from the office that may prove handy for our leather-throwing friends as they walk the fine line between living large and unemployment.

(Now Mo, you’re going to have to be more original than that if you expect to get paid on the streets.) 

Quinton Jackson must be seething with rage right now. As you may recall, following his January 7th second round TKO victory over Lorenz Larkin at Strikeforce: Rockhold vs. Jardine, Muhammed “King Mo” Lawal tested positive for Drostanolone. Shortly thereafter, Mo acquired a particularly brutal case of staph infection that nearly took his life, but the bad news wasn’t over yet.

King Mo appeared before the Nevada State Athletic Commission yesterday to receive his punishment, which was rather standard — a 9 month suspension, a 30% fine of his $80,000 purse, the surrendering of his win bonus, and his bout with Larkin being overturned to a no-contest. However, things took a weird turn after chairperson Pat Lundvall, when referring to the information Lawal knowingly falsified on his pre-fight medical documents, called into question that of Lawal’s ability to read and understand English. Needless to say, Mo was rather insulted by such an accusation, and took to Twitter, where he promptly screwed himself royally.

Follow us after the jump for the full story. 

(Is that Brazilian Walnut I am standing on? Classy.) 

Called it.

As told to FightersOnly magazine by none other than Joey Beltran himself, it appears that the UFC has released “The Mexicutioner” following his first round “kickstand KO” (Props to Stak40 for coining the term) loss to Lavar Johnson at UFC on Fox 2. The loss was Beltran’s fourth in his last five outings but his first ever to come via form of (T)KO. In regards to his release, Beltran stated the following:

I am truly grateful for all the opportunities that I have received from the UFC/Zuffa. I am not sad or hurt by their decision as I know that winning is the name of the game. Posting  a 1-4 record my last 5 fights is unacceptable regardless of how entertaining the fights were. So this is the next chapter of my career, and one that I am excited for. You will definitely see my ugly face again so fans don’t worry and haters keep on hating. 

We know the Internet is a cold, harsh place, but what person claiming to be a fan of MMA would hate Joey Beltran?

“And if you think *I’m* upset, young man, you just WAIT until your father gets home!” (Pic: MMAMania.com)

Sometimes a fighter gets cut under bizarre circumstances that no one saw coming, and sometimes the writing is on the wall.

There was very little Anthony Johnson could have done last night to preserve his job in the UFC, and “losing” wasn’t on the short list. Every facet of Johnson’s battle with gravity has been a spectacle. On Friday night, he missed weight for the third time in his UFC career—that’s a first for the promotion. And when he stepped on the scales, he didn’t miss by a slim margin, either. He was closer to the light heavyweight limit than he was the middleweight. The eleven extra pounds he was sporting? That sets a UFC record as well.

Now we’ve already belabored Johnson’s lack of professionalism over the last two days, and whether it’s through a dinner invitation or a dismissive laugh, “Rumble” has made it clear that he doesn’t care what we the fans think. One person that does matter, however, is his boss. Here’s what Dana White had to say on the issue.

File this one under “least surprising info of the day.” Following back-to-back losses to Brian Stann and Demian Maia at UFC 130 and 136, repectively, word has it that Jorge Santiago has been released by the UFC for the second time. The American Top Team standout’s original run took place back in 2006, where he scored a quick knockout over the now deceased Justin Levens before ending up on the highlight reels of Chris Leben and Alan Belcher for all eternity.

(“I’m here to pick up your daughter. Or your son. Whoever’s free.”)

After a woefully shitty performance against Edwin Figueroa at UFC Live: Hardy vs. Lytle, Jason Reinhardt has officially been released by the UFC. It was Reinhardt’s third loss in the Octagon — in three different weight classes. At 41, he was the oldest active fighter in the UFC.

Reinhardt began his career as a wrecking ball in midwestern regional promotions, racking up an astounding 18-0 record with all wins by stoppage. (It should be noted that only five of his opponents had winning records, and about half were making their MMA debuts.) Though Reinhardt was originally signed to fight Roger Huerta at UFC 63 in 2006, a neck injury delayed his debut until the following year, where he was quickly choked out by Joe Lauzon at UFC 78.

Reinhardt returned to the midwest to beat up a couple more nobodies in local shows, and was inactive for a couple years nursing injuries. In February 2011, the UFC had Jason back as a featherweight, throwing him against Tiequan Zhang. Reinhardt lost by submission (again), this time in just 48 seconds. The UFC gave him one more chance earlier this month, this time at bantamweight against Edwin Figueroa. Reinhardt ran around the cage until Figueroa finally caught up to him and TKO’d him in the second round.

Also, he gave his parents crabs once. For real. That charming little story is after the jump, as told by Jason himself while wearing a coon-skin cap.