It’s really tough being Rampage Jackson these days, you guys. Sure, the boatloads of cash, the film and rap “careers,” and the endless string of Bengal tigers just waiting to be dry-humped are nice and all, but they don’t come close to filling the bottomless chasm left behind in Page’s soul by the swindlers and snake oil salesmen over at the UFC. Because beneath Rampage’s tuff (we imagine that is how he would prefer we spell it) exterior lies a kind, sensitive mixed martial artist that just wants his boss to pat him on the head and tell him that he’s proud of what he’s done. And then stop matching him up against fighters who utilize “gameplans,” “strategies,” “takedowns,” and other facets of modern MMA that are best left for trifling bitches.

And even though we haven’t been covering it as extensively as some, Jackson has been vehemently venting his feelings lately. Like, a lot. And by lately, we mean the past two years or so. And wouldn’t you know it, just a couple weeks out from his final contractually obligated fight at UFC on FOX: Johnson vs. Dodson, the UFC is still screwing with the poor guy. Jackson’s most recent lament was passed along by 5thround:

I’m sponsored by Reebok now and the UFC said I’m not allowed to wear Reebok in the cage, when the other fighters are sponsored by Nike and stuff. Why can’t I have Reebok?

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(Molon Labe)

By Jason Moles

(First off, let me just tell you that I fought the urge to use a “Business as usual” headline. You’re welcome.)

News trickled down last week that Zuffa has instituted a sponsorship ban on all firearm, ammo, hunting, and knife companies. Essentially, no more Matt Hughes. Starting January 23rd, Ammo To Go and The Gun Store, among others, will no longer be able to sponsor fighters. When contacted by CagePotato in hopes to better understand the reasoning behind the less than popular decision, the UFC said only that “These are rules set in place by Fox” — who declined to comment.

Not satisfied with that answer, I called up the man himself. And by “called up,” I mean tweeted. And by “the man himself,” I meant Dana White – not Sheik Tahnoon. His answer only raised more questions, primarily why doesn’t the UFC President know that some of his fighters will soon receive one less paycheck courtesy of FOX? Talk about bad timing, too. Wasn’t it just a week ago that Lorenzo Fertita was touting to ESPN the significant amount of money to be made in sponsorships?

(Wild Bill Hickok is inconsolable upon hearing the news.)

If you’re sick of seeing nearly every fighter in the UFC coming down to the Octagon covered in Full Tilt Poker logos, we’ve got some good news for you.  The UFC sent out an email to managers yesterday informing them that Full Tilt Poker would not be allowed as a sponsor at UFC events “until further notice.”

So what did Full Tilt do to draw this ire?  Did they maybe steal some shelf space in Wal-Mart or (please God let this be the explanation) decide to start their own MMA organization – Full Tilt Xtreme Combat – where they put all their eggs in the War Machine basket?  Sadly, it doesn’t seem to be anything so fun.

Rumor has it that Full Tilt might have been nixed in favor of a competing sponsor, Ultimate Bet, which runs Absolute Poker (you following any of this?).  This is still unconfirmed, and if true it might be problematic since Ultimate Bet was apparently involved in some huge cheating scandal.

It seems more likely that the pressure to remove Full Tilt as a sponsor was coming from Spike TV, who put a kibosh on Full Tilt signage at UFC 95 and likely didn’t feel any more inclined to allow them at next week’s Fight Night.  Too bad, since they were one of the highest-paying fighter sponsors the UFC had.  Looks like it’s time for some managers to swallow their pride and make a call to Condom Depot.

(The Booyaa Fight Girls: Voted most likely to lie to you about working their way through community college.)

Banning clothing brands as potential sponsors is so much fun, Zuffa is at it once again.  MMA Payout reports that the newest addition to the blacklist is Booyaa Fightwear, an apparel-maker whose loose affiliation with the King of the Cage organization was enough to torpedo their proposed sponsorship of Mike Budnik in his WEC bout this week. 

King of the Cage was part of the Pro Elite network of organizations, but is one of the few entities that can still promote fights and is still somewhat capable of scratching out a living as small-timers.  Apparently this makes KOTC, and by extension Booyaa Fightwear (if ever there was a company name more inspired by the mid-nineties, I’ve yet to hear of it), a perceived competitor of the WEC.  And we all know how Zuffa deals with competitors. 

(Fighter salaries for Affliction: Banned, from SI.com via MMA Mania. Click for larger image.)

One major caveat before we get started — there’s no way that Fedor Emelianenko made a half-million less than Tim Sylvia to be on this card. Either he was given a large signing bonus, or he’s getting a cut of the PPV, or both. No, I don’t have a source on that; you’ll just have to trust me.

Now that that’s out of the way, HOLY CRAP. There’s a difference between paying well and guaranteeing that your promotion will be a money-loser. When they left the UFC, Andrei Arlovski was making $105,000 to show with a $65,000 win bonus, and Tim Sylvia was making $100,000/$100,000. Atencio & Co. could have very generously offered these guys double what they were making, with the promise that contracts could be renegotiated when Affliction’s MMA promotion gets on its feet, financially speaking. In its infinite wisdom, Affliction quintupled and octupled Arlovski and Sylvia’s previous base salaries right off the freakin’ bat. Dana White is seeing these numbers and laughing his pale ass off.

(“What’s up, Anaheim! I just gotta know one thing…HOW’S! TASTE! MY PEE-PEE-PEEEEEEEEEE!!!”)

Can a t-shirt company put together an MMA card that outclasses the UFC? Will Fedor Emelianenko prove he’s still the #1 heavyweight in the world? Will Megadeth play “Symphony of Destruction”? So many questions, and they’ll all be answered tonight, folks. After the jump you’ll find results for Affliction: Banned’s undercard (spoiler alert, obvi), and a full-on play-by-play of the pay-per-view broadcast beginning at 9 p.m. ET. Refresh your browser every few minutes for all the latest, and give us your own thoughts in the comments section. Skulls and wings, baby; skulls and wings…

You may have seen the raw footage of this floating around a week or so ago, but here’s the edited, minute-and-change version of Rich Franklin battling Wanderlei Silva in Rock/Paper/Scissors. The contest was a special exhibition bout that opened the 2008 Bud Light/USA Rock Paper Scissors League Championships — think “click-clack” for white hipsters — which went down June 21-22 at Mandalay Bay in Las Vegas. How ’bout Franklin’s bitch-scream at 0:41? In a way, I think this video is very similar to how an actual fight between Franklin and Silva would go: Silva would come out strong in the first round, then Franklin would rally in the second before smashing Wandy’s scissors with a rock.

Also worth watching:
Countdown to Affliction: Banned (full 30-minute version)
Checking in with Anthony Johnson and Jake O’Brien
Canseco vs. Sikahema (ringside view)
The World’s Worst Stripper (Not safe for retinas, eardrums)

Legendary boxing guru Freddie Roach — who has trained a long list of superstars including Oscar De La Hoya, Mike Tyson, Bernard Hopkins, and James Toney — will enter the world of mixed martial arts on July 19th, when he’ll be working the corner of Andrei Arlovski at Affliction: Banned. According to Fighthype, Arlovski has been developing his hands at Roach’s Wild Card Gym in Los Angeles, in preparation for his bout against Miletich-trained bruiser Ben Rothwell.

Roach fought as a pro boxer from 1978-1986, beginning his career on a 26-1 run before retiring with a 39-13 record. Casual boxing fans may know him best from his appearances on De La Hoya/Mayweather 24/7, the HBO documentary series that followed his training of the Golden Boy. For your viewing pleasure, here’s a short HBO feature on Roach, which details his rough upbringing, boxing career, transition to training, and recent battle against Parkinson’s disease.

Dude, how slick is this? I didn’t care about Mike Whitehead until just now, when I learned that he enjoys head-butting through glass. They may have spelled “Lindland” wrong, but Josh Barnett’s classic throat-slashing thing and the voice of Michael Buffer more than make up for it. Whatever you’re selling, we’ll take two!

(Props: MMAScraps)