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Iconic Album Covers Replaced With Sloths

Tag: birth

Photo of the Day: Stephan Bonnar, MMA Savior, Welcomes His Son Into the World


(Bonnar has clearly yet to inform the little guy of the rules regarding small joint manipulation in MMA, but we’ll give him a pass for now.) 

I don’t mean to get all transcendent on you Taters, but to me, life is little more than a cyclical series of events; with death comes birth, with loss comes acquisition, and so on. And before you ask, yes, I take all of my philosophical life lessons from The Lion King. So it only makes sense that just a day after we bid farewell to one of MMA’s greatest ambassadors in Stephan Bonnar — professionally at least — we should welcome Stephan’s newborn son into the world.

Stephan released this photo on his Twitter account yesterday, along with the caption: “Just wanted to welcome in my MINI ME to this world…right in time to wish ya’ll a Happy Holloween!”

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Jenna Jameson Gives Birth to Two Lil’ Tito’s


(Replicating themselves at a frightening pace.)

Porn actress Jenna Jameson gave birth to twin boys in Newport Beach, California today, ensuring that Tito Ortiz’s genetic line will march proudly on into the future.  If you’re like me, you are now imagining two infants with gigantic heads like their father and vacant, surgically weirded-out eyes like their mother.  Adorable.

We already hypothesized that any children to come out of the unholy Ortiz-Jameson union would have the potential to be serious bad-asses, since their father is a world famous fighter and their mother is a world famous fornicator.  You just have to imagine that some fights will erupt on the playground once the other kids know enough to make fun of this unique parentage.  I mean, I grew up with a kid whose mom was the school lunch lady and he had to defend her honor on more than one occasion. 

Now imagine if instead of serving up soggy tater tots in a hair net, your mom was blowing dudes while a midget watched, and the video was readily available on the internet.

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