After a few months of keeping him far, far away from Kimbo Slice, EliteXC is ready to give Brett “The Grim” Rogers his next fight. Five Ounces of Pain reports that the undefeated heavyweight — who has won all eight of his fights via stoppage due to strikes — has agreed to meet American Kickboxing Academy’s Paul Buentello (26-10) at EliteXC’s “A Night of Champions” show on November 8th in Reno.

Rogers hasn’t fought since his 61-second KO of Jon Murphy at EliteXC: Primetime in May. Buentello is under contract with Affliction, and was slated to face Roy Nelson at “Day of Reckoning” earlier this month until the event was canceled. He was also scheduled to face Aleksander Emelianenko at “Banned” in July, but wound up fighting (and winning a decision over) replacement opponent Gary Goodridge when Aleks was pulled from the card.

The booking of Rogers/Buentello adds even more muscle to what’s shaping up to be an impressive Showtime card. The lineup, as it stands, looks like this:

Robbie Lawler vs. Joey Villasenor (for middleweight title)
Nick Diaz vs. Eddie Alvarez (for vacant lightweight title)
Brett Rogers vs. Paul Buentello
Scott Smith vs. Hector Lombard
Kaitlin Young vs. Sarah Kaufman
Rafael “Feijao” Cavalcante vs. TBA

- Drew Fickett gets waaaaaay too personal in forum post. (UG)

- Kim Couture calls Jared Shaw a perv, no one is terribly surprised. (Steve Cofield)

- Kenny Florian struggles for answers on “MMA Live”. (ESPN)

- Michael Bisping responds to Chris Leben with dry British sarcasm. (Fighters Only)

- TUF 8 ratings rebound with Junie Browning’s alcohol-fueled antics. (MMA Payout)

- Marcus Aurelio says Hermes Franca is a bad person. (MMA Rated)

- Bobby Lashley goes from WWE to ATT. (AmericanTopTeam.com)

- Brett Rogers to fight TBA for EliteXC in November. (AOL Fanhouse)

- The sad state of product placement. (Wall Street Fighter)

- Tribute to the naughty nurse. (Holy Taco)

- Eric Cartman’s most evil moments. (Screen Junkies)

- Japanese wrestler beaten by coach. (Nothing Toxic)

It’s been a Kimbo-tastic week at ESPN, so naturally MMA Live had to get into the act with their own one-on-one interview of Kimbo Slice before Saturday’s big fight. For the most part it’s the usual material, but about two and a half minutes in Brett Rogers becomes a topic of conversation, and that’s where things get interesting.

First, Kimbo says he isn’t going to fight someone just for running his mouth and says he doesn’t “even want to call out his name because he doesn’t deserve respect.” Right, because all Rogers has done is rack up an 8-0 record, finishing all eight fights. We have yet to see him against Afro Puff, for Pete’s sake!

Kimbo then criticizes Rogers for “just fighting to get paid,” and goes on to say that for him it’s personal. He’s fighting for a cause, and that cause is his family. As for what he has to gain from fighting Rogers, Kimbo replies: “Nothing.”

Let me see if I understand this. Kimbo isn’t just fighting for money; he’s fighting for his family. Which means what, exactly? I always thought that when guys say they’re fighting for their families (a noble reason, I might add), what they mean is that they’re fighting to make money so they can provide for their family. Correct me if I’m wrong, but Kimbo has been paid very well for his each of his three pro fights, has he not? And yet Rogers catches heat for calling Kimbo out and trying to get paid? I don’t get it. Just like I don’t get how, if it’s personal for Kimbo, he wouldn’t fight a guy for running his mouth. Isn’t that exactly why you’d fight him if it was all personal?

Look, everyone fights for money. They do it because they love it, sure, but this is their career. It makes perfect sense for Rogers to try and build his name and up his salary by beating Kimbo. And Kimbo does have plenty to gain by fighting Rogers, such as credibility. If he beats Rogers, it will prove that he can do more than pound on tomato cans and over-the-hill fighters who are on long losing streaks, which is more than he’s done so far. Please Kimbo, fight Brett Rogers. You can both get paid. And if you win, we’ll all stop complaining that you haven’t fought anybody.

(Now that is one grim Sam’s Club.)

In case you missed it, we were falling out over Team Bison’s “official statement on behalf of Brett Rogers” yesterday. They naturally took the opportunity to bash Kimbo Slice and Ken Shamrock, accusing the former of shuckin’ and duckin’ and the latter of being 103 years old, but they had us at “Black Yeti.” Being the industrious reporter that he is, Five Ounces of Pain’s Sam Caplan contacted Kimbo’s camp for a response. What he got, courtesy of Kimbo’s manager, Icey Mike, was the above photo with the remark: “Rogers, don’t quit your day job.”

Seriously, Icey Mike? That’s it? Team Bison comes out with a dissertation on the lameness of Kimbo Slice and all Team Kimbo can come up with is a picture and a sentence? Sounds like someone’s entourage isn’t earning their money. It isn’t enough to just stand in the background and shout ‘Do it, Ferg!’ anymore, fellas. You’re in the big time now.

The remark is an apparent reference to Brett Rogers’ former job working as a tire repairmen at Sam’s Club. Trouble is, he already quit back in January. So this is kind of like coming back with a generic ‘your momma’ joke after a deeply personal attack. It lacks imagination and zing!, in other words.

Honestly, if there was one aspect of this Slice-Rogers feud that I really expected Kimbo to come out on top in, it was the pre-fight entourage shit-talking. Now I don’t know what to believe in. Thanks for the existential crisis, Icey Mike.

You were wondering how Brett Rogers feels about getting spurned by Elite XC in favor Ken Shamrock? Five Ounces of Pain has the scoop in a statement on behalf of Brett Rogers. Things start out all puppy dogs and rainbows in regards to the way Elite XC is handling their business, but don’t worry, Shamrock and “Fergi” get their come-uppance at the end:

As for Oct 4th; that was our spot. Shamrock with his name and giant ego butted in line to get a slice of Kevin. At 103 years of age Ken usurped our rightful place against the YouTube champ. Our sincerest hope is that Ken whips Kimbo and then we can finally euthanize the “World’s Most Dangerous Man” and relegate him to some MMA dinosaur exhibit. Maybe taxidermy him and Severn and place them on a rotating pedestal where they can endless circle each other.

If Ken proves to be more sham then rock and Fergi beats him, then the Slice hype grows even greater. Dude is already more myth then Sasquatch, Chupacabra and a fucking unicorn combined. Kevin is the black Yeti.

Caught between a Shamrock and a hard place, Kevin has chosen the old over the new; the past over the future. But Fergi… the hard place is coming. By putting us off, making us wait will only make matters worse. There is nothing business about it anymore. Kimbo made it a point to go frontin’ to our boys at Big Black. But that street thug B.S. might work well with the fan bois and the Internet dorks who think your street cred means something; but Son… Brett comes from Cabrini Green; the worst 12 blocks of America. Compared to that your street is Sesame Street. So you can say it is very personal between Brett and Fergi. So go ahead and make us wait while you fight Tank and Shamrock. Hell, why not fight Hackney, Harold Howard, Fred Ettish and the rest of Jurassic MMA? And while your shuckin’ and duckin’ we will be hustlin’ and muscilin’ and when the bell finally tolls the only real question left is … do you wake up looking at canvas or arena lights?

On behalf of Brett Rogers – Team Bison

Wow. Black Yeti? Shuckin’ and duckin’? Hustlin’ and musclin’? Sounds like the official trash-talking statement writer over at Team Bison is doing work, son.

(“Yeah man, so this is like, one of the *actual tires* that came off of Rampage’s truck. No shit. Got it off Craigslist.” Photo of The Grim by Esther Lin.)

Nick Diaz and Brett Rogers won’t be sitting on their hands waiting for their arch-rivals KJ Noons and Kimbo Slice to become available — MMA Junkie reports that both fighters have been scheduled to appear at EliteXC’s November 8th event, which will be broadcast on Showtime. Their opponents haven’t been announced yet, but EliteXC’s Jared Shaw confirmed that Joey Villasenor will also be part of the event; rumor has it that he could face Robbie Lawler for the middleweight title.

Speaking of the Showtime card, FiveOuncesofPain reports that EliteXC wants to add Eddie Alvarez to the lineup, and build up to a fight for the vacated lightweight title if him and Nick Diaz win their fights and KJ Noons continues to be a problem. Side note: Before Diaz competes again for EliteXC, he’ll head to Japan to battle Hayato “Mach” Sakurai at DREAM.6 (September 23rd; Saitama, Japan) for DREAM’s welterweight title. In other EliteXC news…

— A fight between Cristiane “Cris Cyborg” Santos and Yoko Takahashi has been officially added to the undercard of Saturday Night Fights III on October 4th. If time permits, the match will be shown on the broadcast on a tape-delay basis. Cyborg vows to improve on her last performance by knocking Takahashi out three times in the first round.

— EliteXC’s heavyweight champ Antonio “Bigfoot” Silva has released a longer statement about his steroid bust. Some highlights:

I don’t know why I was so discouraged to hear that Elite XC had decided to match Kimbo Slice against Ken Shamrock, with a Brett Rogers option reserved for some possible version of the future. I should have expected this. I guess I’m just too much of an optimist. I thought Elite XC might try for a competitive, somewhat meaningful fight instead. I’ll never learn.

It’s not that I don’t understand what Elite XC is thinking. If anything, that part is all too obvious. They want a name to put on the marquee next to Kimbo’s. Someone with drawing power, yes, but not someone who stands a good chance of winning. Preferably, they’d also like the next Kimbo victim to be susceptible to knockout. So they called on Shamrock, an over-the-hill legend who has been getting KO’d by a list of fighters that starts out fairly impressive and then gets less and less so as we near the present. He’s perfect, given their priorities, but that only tells us how screwed up their priorities are.

But it’s not just Shamrock-Slice. Look at another high profile Elite XC fighter, Gina Carano. Instead of matching her up against “Cyborg” Santos — a fight they were already hyping by the end of Santos’ victory at “Unfinished Business” — they’ve decided to put Carano up against Kelly Kobald, who’s coming off two straight losses. They’re not even bothering to try and come up with a compelling explanation for it, just ask Pro Elite CEO Chuck Champion:

“It’s giving both an opportunity to further develop their fan bases and develop further excitement around the potential of them coming together,” Chuck Champion, CEO of ProElite, which runs the EliteXC brand, told MMAjunkie.com (www.mmajunkie.com). “If Chris destroys another opponent, people are really going to be clamoring, especially if Gina gets in and clobbers hers. It’s just really about letting the fighters develop, letting them grow in their skills and their character development in order for them to eventually meet one another.”

In other words, they’d rather string us along with a few squash matches first. The fact that they aren’t even intended to be competitive, that doesn’t seem to bother Elite XC. And that’s what’s really disappointing.

Sherdog scores the sad scoop:

Ken Shamrock will be the fourth man to face Kevin “Kimbo Slice” Ferguson when the two icons clash at EliteXC’s third installment of “Saturday Night Fights” Oct. 4 at the BankAtlantic Center in Sunrise, Fla. The headlining bout will anchor a live broadcast on CBS. Sherdog.com confirmed the bout’s signing with multiple parties aware of the fight, while a press release is expected to circulate later today with the news. The 44-year-old Shamrock (26-13-2) beat out fellow candidates Sean Gannon and Brett Rogers, who called out Slice in May, for the coveted slot.

[*shakes head*] Okay. So first off, Ken Shamrock has lost his last five fights by first-round KO/TKO. He has a tendency to get grazed on the chin, drop to the mat with his eyes rolled up in his head, and then immediately pop up to complain when the ref stops the fight. Maybe it’s just bad luck. Maybe he’s more susceptible to flash knockouts than most all MMA fighters. Whatever the case, he shouldn’t be headlining a network television fight card. Slice vs. Rogers would be a contest that MMA fans would actually want to watch. The only question we’ll have after Slice vs. Shamrock is, will the World’s Most Dangerous Man finally retire after this one?

It’s as good a time as any to bring up this fun fact: Kimbo’s second EliteXC opponent, Tank Abbott, had lost seven of his past eight fights before stepping into the cage at “Street Certified” in February. James Thompson had lost six of his last eight when he faced Kimbo at “Primetime.” Now, perhaps because Thompson gave Slice more problems than EliteXC had expected, they’re giving him Shamrock, who like Tank, has also lost seven of his last eight. These guys are beyond “jobbers” — they’re woefully unsuccessful.

(Reflecting on what might have been.)

Of all the incredulous claims about Kimbo Slice‘s future, it’s starting to seem like very few of them are going to pan out. Though Si.com reported that former Boston police officer Sean Gannon was the front runner to become Slice’s next opponent on the October 4 CBS show, Elite XC’s Jared Shaw told Five Ounces of Pain that the bout definitely won’t be happening. You could interpret this as a sign that Elite XC has officially gotten their collective mind right when it comes to Kimbo Slice matchmaking, but Sam Caplan says the fight was scratched not because it’s a pointless circus bout, but because of Gannon’s “financial demands.”

In other words, Elite XC is perfectly willing to bring YouTube quality fights to network TV, but only if they can do it cheap. Looks like we’re back to either Ken Shamrock or Brett Rogers.

Outside the cage, it looks as if Kimbo will no longer be co-starring with Hulk Hogan in the lovable 3-D children’s film “Kung Fu U.” According to the Wall Street Journal’s Market Watch, things fell apart “due to a misunderstanding among the agents involved with the Kimbo Slice deal” and Stereo Vision has since retracted their press release.

You know what that means? There’s a spot open in a hot new 3-D martial arts movie, and you get to play opposite Hulk Hogan, of “Mr. Nanny” fame! Get those audition tapes ready. Try to make them better than this one.

(This seems like something we should relive on network television, right?)

The rumor mill has been churning this week as to who Elite XC will get to take on Kimbo Slice on their October 4 CBS event, which is being called something of a make-or-break show for the organization. In a new article on Si.com, Josh Gross adds another name to the list: Sean freaking Gannon.

As in, the Boston cop who defeated Slice in an ugly, amateurish brawl back in 2004. As in, the guy who later got a shot in the UFC, only to be trounced by the unremarkable Brandon Lee Hinkle. As in, the guy who is officially 1-1 in MMA competition. That Sean Gannon.

Gross says that difficulty signing Ken Shamrock and concerns that undefeated heavyweight Brett Rogers would actually beat Kimbo (apparently that’s enough to nix an opponent for Slice) are making the Gannon bout a very real possibility at this point.

There are many, many reasons why this is an idiotic idea. To name just one, Gannon isn’t an MMA fighter. He hasn’t competed since 2005, doesn’t seem to be actively pursuing a career in the sport, and hasn’t done anything that would suggest he should be fighting professionally on CBS. He’s just a tough guy who once fought and outlasted Kimbo back in his street brawling days. In other words, this fight would be a major step back for MMA, not to mention one that would happen on network TV.

Let’s all hope that this is nothing more than a vicious, hateful rumor. Let’s hope that when Elite XC executives hear of it, they scoff out loud. Let’s hope that when Brett Rogers hears of it, he doesn’t murder whoever is closest to him. Let’s hope, but let’s not be too shocked if it turns out to be true.

(Up next: a real fight, or a shameless hype match?)

What do you do if you’re Pro Elite and you want to distract people from the bad news regarding event cancellations and concerns that you’re on the verge of going under? You find a way to get Kimbo Slice back in the news. That may be why Elite XC is planning to announce Slice’s opponent for the October 4 event on CBS some time at the end of this week or early next week.

Eite XC representatives supposedly said that the organization is considering three possible opponents for Slice, two of which are “big names” within MMA circles. Since Brett Rogers is probably not considered a big name to anyone other than hardcore fans who want to see him test Slice, it’s fair to assume that the other two names belong to older, past-their-prime fighters.

Ken Shamrock has been rumored as a possible opponent for Kimbo, as has Don Frye. We’d like to dismiss that as idle chatter, if only it didn’t sound so much like something Elite XC would do. Brett Rogers has very cleverly put Elite XC in a position where they almost have to give him Kimbo, or at least they have to if they want to have a chance at Kimbo being taken seriously as a fighter on the rise.

Since that seems low on their list of priorities, the only thing stopping them from tossing an aged and battered Shamrock in there is probably availability and/or price. Fortunately for MMA fans, that may be enough to make the Slice-Rogers fight happen.

In other Pro Elite-related news, the brief stock price explosion is now over. The stock fell from $8.00 to $2.75 on Monday, still a small improvement from the $2.50 mark where it jumped up from on Friday. Hope you sold your shares when you had the chance. And by shares we mean that old Camaro that’s on blocks in your front lawn. And by sold we mean had it towed away before those raccoons made it into a permanent home.

(LOFL!)

— Brock Lesnar has brought in seven-time BJJ world champion Rodrigo “Comprido” Medeiros to help out with his ground game in preparation for his match against Heath Herring at UFC 87 (August 9th, Minneapolis). Lesnar by flying cockswordplata?

— UFC: Silva vs. Irvin is now officially listed on UFC.com’s events page, while UFC 88 (September 6th, Atlanta) has been dubbed “Breakthrough”; no matches are listed yet other than the Liddell/Evans headliner.

— Fightline.com reports that Jared Shaw has confirmed Kimbo Slice and Brett Rogers will fight in October. The fight will “more than likely” take place on CBS. A Nick Diaz/KJ Noons match is being discussed as a co-main event for the same card.

— Affliction: Banned will feature a performance by Megadeth (!), who will be rockin’ out at key points throughout the event. Hopefully that means they’ll be playing the end of “Peace Sells” during Fedor’s ring entrance, and then “Killing Is My Business” during the main event fight itself.

— A “Japan and South Korea friendship event” called Kakutougi Taikai GLADIATOR has been scheduled for August 16th in Okayama, Japan, featuring a headlining bout between crusty American legend Don Frye and Japanese middleweight Ikuhisa “The Punk” Minowa, aka “Minowaman.” Minowa is no stranger to freak show bouts, as he already holds wins over Paulo Cesar Silva, Eric “Butterbean” Esch, Bum Chan Kang, and Phil Baroni.

Drop whatever it is you’re pretending to do and watch this highlight reel (props: KingAtRock), which covers the year’s best knockouts from the UFC and EliteXC, starring Kala Kolohe Hose, Wilson Gouveia, Tim Boetsch, Chris Leben, Brett Rogers, Yves Edwards, and Kimbo Slice.

Also: If you need proof of Dana White’s rumored iron-pumping prowess, check out the wacky video after the jump.

Recently dug up by MMA Scraps, here’s the video of a totally bald Brett Rogers winning the vacant EFX heavyweight championship in February ’07 by knocking out Josh Melichar in 9 seconds. Whoever that announcer is, he’s giving Scott Ferrall a run for his money. (“Are you ready to crank it ahhhhhhhhh, BAY-BAYYYYY!”) Another, somewhat less impressive performance by “The Grim” is after the jump.

At least that’s what he said during an appearance on The Dan Le Batard Show yesterday. When asked about Brett Rogers’s call-out at the EliteXC post-fight press conference last Saturday, Slice said:

“He’s probably looking at it like, okay yo, Kimbo Slice could be a meal ticket, but his corner needs to tell him there’s ways to do it, and that just was not one of the ways. Instead of making the fight up more on the business tip, this is gonna be personal.”

Le Batard asked if that meant he’d definitely be fighting Rogers next, to which Kimbo replied, “Yeah, hell yeah, I’m gonna fight him now, the man just called me out.” As for when the fight could take place? “Probably October.” Slice doesn’t expect to fight before then, partly because of injuries sustained to his thumbs.

In another interesting moment from the interview, Kimbo acknowledged all the pressure he was feeling from his bosses to win the fight:

“If I was gonna lose the fight, it would have been a major letdown to CBS — that’s like [*bleeeeeep*] CBS, you know how big-time that is — and then you got Showtime, and EliteXC, ProElite. You got all these huge, major companies…and everyone depending on this one guy to win this just one fight, and if he doesn’t win this one fight, it’ll just be a major letdown, it would have just been a disappointment to all these people.”

Of course, Gary Shaw could still throw a wrench in Kimbo’s plans, but for now it’s looking like the Grim’s pleas will be answered. Listen to the rest of interview to hear Kimbo’s full analysis of his fight with James Thompson, and an embarrassing parody tribute song by fake-Cameo that Kimbo gives a “[*bleep*]‘n strong 7.”

(Props: FightOpinion.com)

(Kaitlin Young was swept under the rug after her fight with Gina Carano.)

“[T]he doctor actually cleared me to fight the third round but the commission said no. I wanted to continue, my corner wanted to continue. The cut likely would have opened in the third but it was under the eye. If I had to guess, I would say that they didn’t want the visual of a woman with a bloody face on CBS. They also chose not to do a post fight interview with me or to include me in the post fight news conference and after party. I think the reason for that was my beat up appearance after the fight because I was not seriously injured and was completely coherent. I am very disappointed about that but cant help but wonder how people would have responded to that, as stupid as it is.” — Kaitlin Young, on her loss to Gina Carano and resulting media snub.

“Brett is gonna have to learn that it’s about the money…I don’t think [a fight between Brett Rogers and Kimbo Slice] is a fight that I would do. I might do Brett Rogers against [Antonio] Silva…but that’s what makes me a promoter. I appreciate all you guys, but you don’t run me. I’m just saying, I don’t read blogs, I don’t read anything…I run a professional sports franchise. My job is to put asses in seats, build stars, build superstars, not let someone guide me who fights who.” — Gary Shaw, getting a little hot under the collar during an interview with MMARated.

“I’m confident I’ll fight again. I’m also OK with the idea that it may not happen. I may get a bad (court) ruling and I can’t really see myself at this point going back and fighting two more times for the UFC if that’s what the state says I have to do. So there’s the potential I could be done fighting and I’m OK with that too.” — Randy Couture, on his disputed contract status with the UFC.

“Ortiz says he’s ’65 percent’ sure that he’ll begin his own MMA organization. ‘When I was in the UFC, they talked so much about how I wanted to get out of it and how I wanted to stop fighting,’ Ortiz said. ‘It was a bunch of baloney. I still see 3-4 more years of competition left (in me) and I want to build. I want to make a (rival) company neck and neck with the UFC. I think it’s going to be about taking care of the fighters and that’s what I’m going to do.’” — Tito Ortiz in an interview with the Boston Herald.

Hey all; just got back from Newark, and boy is my t-shirt sweaty. Lots to talk about, of course, but I first wanted to share this highlight from the post-event press conference. As the fighters trickled in one-by-one, each was given some time to address the press before questions were directed at the group. Brett Rogers used his mic time to savage Kimbo Slice’s performance. “I’m a real heavyweight,” he said, “and that was some garbage-ass shit.” Regarding James Thompson, Rogers said “I didn’t know you could win three times in the same night and still lose.”

When Kimbo finally arrived, entourage in tow, Rogers was prompted to get back on the mic and repeat what he said while Kimbo was within earshot. No punk, Rogers complied. The above video — taken with my garbage-ass Canon PowerShot — is what happened next. Not sure how much of this is manufactured hype, or a calculated attention-grab by Rogers, but we think Kimbo just found his next opponent.

Good news, Potato Nation: MMA/American Gladiators star Gina Carano will be taking a break from making us cry. EliteXC announced today that Carano has been booked for their May 31st CBS debut, and will face Kaitlin Young, a 4-1 fighter hailing from the Minnesota Martial Arts Academy. Most notably, Young won an eight-woman HooknShoot tournament last November, knocking out three opponents in the same night, all within the first minute of the first round. [Ed. note: Holy fucking shit! Mo chuisle!] So basically, Gina’s gonna want to protect her face.

Also officially announced today is a bout between undefeated brawler Brett Rogers — who most recently knocked out James Thompson at “Street Certified”— and fellow heavyweight John Murphy. Meaning that the tentative main card, at this point, looks like this:

Kimbo vs. TBA (heavyweights)
Robbie Lawler vs. Scott Smith (for middleweight championship belt)
Gina Carano vs. Kaitlin Young (weight limit TBA?)
Phil Baroni vs. Murilo “Ninja” Rua (middleweights)
Brett Rogers vs. John Murphy (heavyweights)

Ooh, feel our goosebumps! The booking of Carano was clutch, as it adds a second mainstream-ish star to the network broadcast. We don’t know how much green Gary Shaw had to promise in order to lure the semi-estranged Carano back into the fold, but if it helps put EliteXC over with a skeptical CBS audience, it’ll be worth it. The only question is, has Crush been getting in enough MMA training between pugel-stick jousts and zip-line rides?

Speaking of which…

Yves Edwards knocks out Edson Berto via one-legged hopping-knee with four seconds left in round one:

James Thompson adds to another fighter’s highlight reel with his predictable knockout loss to Brett Rogers:

Bonus: Kimbo Slice and Bas Rutten give their thoughts on the Tank fight and what might be next:

(Look out Kimbo, he’s got an air-shotgun!)

Brass tacks — EliteXC: “Street Certified” goes down tomorrow night at Miami’s Bank United Center; Showtime will broadcast the main card starting at 10 p.m., and we’ll be doing a liveblog, so swing by for live round-by-round results. And now, our predictions:

Tank vs. Kimbo (heavyweights): We all know how this is going to end. A month ago, we offered a “fantastic” prize to the CagePotato reader who could call the result the closest. Well, the prediction lines will be open until the end of the day, so throw a guess on the comments section of that page for your chance to win (what else) a signed copy of Iceman: My Fighting Life by Chuck Liddell. We’re sticking with our prediction of Kimbo winning by TKO (punches) in 59 seconds. MMABettingBlog says that since the betting odds on this match are so heavily stacked in Kimbo’s favor — he’s a -450 favorite, meaning you’d have to bet $450 on him to get $100 back if he wins — Tank is actually the smart money bet. Especially if you think losing money is smart.

Antonio Silva vs. Ricco Rodriguez (heavyweights): Speaking of sports betting, this fight reminds me of my personal rule — never bet against the streak. And as we discussed yesterday, Bigfoot Silva’s got a crazy one going: 10 fights, all of them lasting less than four minutes. Outside of the Ben Rothwell spit-debacle decision loss, Ricco “Suave” has been looking great lately, with six stoppage wins in his last seven fights. We just don’t think he’ll be able to deal with Silva’s size and power — Bigfoot by first-round GnP TKO. By the way, Rodriguez said this at yesterday’s press conference: “Win or lose, six months from now Antonio and I will be fighting again, probably for a title. We are the two best fighters in this organization right now. Tank and Kimbo are just tomato cans. We are the two real fighters.” We have a feeling Ricco might live to regret that quote…