(At times like these, you just have to keep telling yourself, “At least I’m not Ray Elbe…at least I’m not Ray Elbe…” / Image via MiddleEasy)

Can we all just pretend that Hector Lombard‘s UFC debut against Tim Boetsch didn’t happen? The heavy-handed killer we saw run down Rousimar Palhares like a frightened deer at the TUF Smashes Finale was the guy we’ve been waiting for and expecting since he jumped over to the UFC from Bellator. But there was a reason why Lombard’s dance partner looked tentative during the match — Palhares suffered ligament damage and broken bones in his foot after throwing a kick in the opening moments. Toquinho explains:

“During the fight, my kick was working well. But soon in the first round, one of my kicks hit Lombard’s shin below his knee. I heard a snap, and I knew something bad happened. From that moment on, I [started] feeling my foot more and more numb and without strength to walk around the Octagon.”

An injury early into a match can take a fighter’s mind completely out of the competition — just ask Travis Browne. As Palhares struggled to process his body’s new limitations, he turned into a sitting duck for Lombard’s power punches, and now the Cuban is officially a factor in the middleweight division. Meanwhile, Palhares has now lost his last two UFC bouts by first-round stoppage, including his TKO defeat against Alan Belcher in May. Get well soon, Stump.

(Little did Stitch know that the worst was yet to come…)

When I was growing up, I was one fearless son of a bitch. This ignorance of one’s mortality that is present in most adolescent boys, combined with a rubbery yet somehow fragile bone structure, led to horrifying injury after horrifying injury. When I was ten, my older brother shattered my collarbone reenacting The People’s Elbow that he had just seen on TV, an injury that has limited my ability to enjoy any Dwayne Johnson vehicle to this day. Two years before that, while reenacting the ending of King Kong vs. Godzilla, my skull was split open by a rock that my younger brother threw just a little too low. Add in more than a half dozen soccer-related broken toes, a dislocated knee and shoulder, and torn hamstring/broken ankle combination that made me yelp like a little bitch with every single step I took in the weeks afterward, and you have a shortened but accurate profile of the kind of damage my body has been through in the short 23 years I have been on this earth.

I’ve seen some injuries is what I’m saying.

But clearly, the various afflictions I have suffered pale in comparison to the twenty or so fighters who were scheduled to compete this summer, only to be struck down by an injury curse the likes of which this sport has yet to see. One of the men who actually managed to compete this summer was former Strikeforce middleweight champion Cung Le, whose nose alone has seen rougher times than most multiple war veterans. After picking up his first UFC win over Patrick Cote at UFC 148, Le apparently injured his foot during some training-related exercise, and decided to videotape himself undergoing an ancient Chinese process (no, not Calgon) in order to help mend his wounded foot.

Video after the jump. For real this time.