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21 Humans Who Make Being Human Look Really, Really Hard

Tag: Cain Velasquez

AAAAAARRRRRGHHHH!!!: Mark Hunt Arrested in New Zealand, Visa Denied for UFC 160 Bout With Junior Dos Santos [UPDATED]


(Yep. That pretty much sums it up.) 

God. Damn. It.

Although details are sketchy at best right now, it appears that UFC heavyweight contender/future champion Mark Hunt has been arrested in his native New Zealand and has consequently been denied the Visa that would allow him to fly to Las Vegas, kick Junior Dos Santos’ ass on May 25th, and secure the next shot at Cain Velasquez. The information was passed along by none other than Hunt himself via his Twitter account. Caution: the following contains several naughty words and a noticeable absence of the letter “c.”

Well thanks to a idiot friend of mine I did get arrested. Denied again at airport I’m never helping anymore dikhead mates. This is wat happens wen u have friends that are dikheads the last fukn time I help these mother fkn trouble makers. 

New Zealand: It’s pretty much Stockton, CA with nicer summers.

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The Unsupportable Opinion: Why Are We Still Talking About Fallon Fox?


(Not pictured: Anything Fallon Fox has actually done in the cage.)

Let me make one thing clear from the very beginning: I’m not trying to say that it wasn’t newsworthy — even inspirational — when Fallon Fox first came out as a transgender MMA fighter. Transgender individuals are extremely prone to harassment, discrimination, violence and bigoted stereotyping — all tragically evident by looking at the Facebook posts and tweets that have been directed at Fox since she came out roughly one month ago. I am in full support of her rights to be socially acknowledged and treated as any other woman would be treated outside of the cage.

Yet during this past month, Fallon Fox has received more attention for simply existing (she’s 0-0 since coming out) than most professionals have received for actually fighting. We’ve seen numerous fighters come forward to offer their opinions on whether or not Fox should be allowed to compete against women. Some have managed to do so in a reasonable, intelligent manner. Others have spoken about “it” as if she isn’t even human. For that matter, even people who aren’t MMA fighters have expressed a willingness to compete against her.

Mind you, this was all before Matt Mitrione called Fox “a lying, sick, sociopathic, disgusting freak” on Monday’s edition of “The MMA Hour,” earning him an indefinite suspension from the UFC.

Despite the punishment, UFC fighters are still willing to discuss Fallon Fox — who, let’s remember, doesn’t even fight in the UFC — with reporters. Yesterday, The New York Post published an interview with one of the most talented, popular, and accomplished female fighters of all time, Ronda Rousey. A total of zero questions had anything to do with Rousey’s own future in the sport, instead focusing on how she feels about potentially fighting Fallon Fox:

“She can try hormones, chop her pecker off, but it’s still the same bone structure a man has,” Rousey told The Post. “It’s an advantage. I don’t think it’s fair.”

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Cain Velasquez Says Fallon Fox Shouldn’t Be Allowed to Fight Women; Fox’s Prospective Opponents Seem to Agree


(Props: Toby Newell via mmafanmade.tumblr.com)

With all of the controversy surrounding the career of transgender MMA fighter Fallon Fox, it should come as little surprise that reporters have been asking athletes — regardless of their sexes — for their take on whether or not she should be allowed to fight. The latest fighter to voice his opinion on the controversial competitor is none other than UFC Heavyweight champion Cain Velasquez, who isn’t as open to the idea of allowing Fox to fight against other women as some of us are.

Like many people, Velasquez believes that Fox holds an unfair advantage over her competition, and should only be allowed to fight other transgender athletes. Via MMAFighting:

“I don’t think she should be able to fight women,” Velasquez flatly responded when asked about Fox at a recent media luncheon.

“Having the same bone structure and everything else as a man, I think definitely does give her an advantage.”

“Maybe have a separate [division], I guess,” the UFC heavyweight champion finished. “I don’t know. But I don’t think that’s fair.”

Even though the champion’s comments don’t exactly bring any new ideas to the discussion, they’re interesting due to their timing. Over the course of the past week, Fox has seen one opponent withdraw from an upcoming CFA featherweight tournament bout against her, and her proposed replacement opponent holding off on signing the bout agreement. Her initial semifinal adversary — a 6’1” female named Peggy “The Daywalker” Morgan — has made it very clear that she backed out under the belief that she is at an unfair disadvantage. After discussing her decision on Inside MMA, she has since released a follow-up statement through Relentless Sports Marketing, which includes the following passage:

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Obvious Statement of the Day: Stefan Struve is “A 265-Pound, Seven-Foot Monster”


(Demetrious Johnson had never seen a giraffe in person before this photo was taken. He still hasn’t, but don’t tell him that.) 

Despite being a relatively humble guy by fighter’s standards, Stefan Struve isn’t afraid to make a bold statement every now and again. Or in today’s case, a couple obvious ones. First, Struve spoke to UFC.com about his upcoming UFC on FUEL 8 tilt with PRIDE legend Mark Hunt (check out an awesome promo for the event here). After making such straightforward statements as “[Hunt] will not try and take me down” and “I’m fine when I keep my distance,” Struve ended the interview by declaring that “I’m not a boy among men anymore, you know? Now I’m a 265-pound, seven-foot monster.” Which is fine, until you see how he made that statement.

One thing’s for sure, it will be interesting to see how Struve is accepted by the people of Japan, who have a somewhat rocky history with creatures his size.

After the jump: Struve makes some more obvious statements about the implications of a win on Saturday. What do you mean it’s a slow news day?

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Cain Velasquez vs. Bigfoot Silva Rematch, Dos Santos vs. Overeem Set for UFC 160 in May


(But other than that, how was the fight, Antonio? / Photo via Getty Images)

As first reported by a “random Irish person” and officially confirmed last night on UFC Tonight, Cain Velasquez will defend his heavyweight title at UFC 160 (May 25th, Las Vegas) in a rematch against Antonio “Bigfoot” Silva, just one year after Velasquez tore Silva apart at UFC 146. Though Bigfoot is coming off back-to-back stoppages of Travis Browne and Alistair Overeem, the news still comes as a bit of a surprise; even Bigfoot’s management felt that he should win a couple more fights before testing his fate against Cain Velasquez again.

Unfortunately, there aren’t many better options in the heavyweight division right now. Velasquez won’t fight his teammate Daniel Cormier, and the rest of the UFC’s heavyweight contenders either have their next fight booked already, or lack the kind of hype that Bigfoot currently carries after his comeback win over The Reem. And what are you going to do, have your champion sit out until a totally legitimate contender emerges? Come on. That’s not how you run a business.

So will Velasquez smash Antonio Silva for the second time, or should we start preparing for “The Bigfoot Era”? (Step one: Stock up on canned goods. Step two: Limber up.) In other UFC 160 heavyweight booking news…

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Rumor: Junior Dos Santos’ Pre-UFC 155 Personal Problems Involved Split With Wife

When Junior Dos Santos attempted to write off his lopsided defeat to Cain Velasquez at UFC 155 as the result of “personal” issues, most of us just assumed that he was having a difficult time facing the fact that he was bested by a man he had previously destroyed. “Excuses are like assholes,” commented at least one of you. “JDS was way to overconfident and paid for it,” said a few others.

However, if the rumors currently circulating the MMA blogosphere have any truth to them, it was actually Armfarmer who provided the most astute observation of JDS when he declared that “Maybe he finally realized that he’s married to a 2 when he could be pulling 10′s left and right. That realization would sure cause me some distracting personal problems..” A bit harsh? Surely, but according to Tatame’s Guilherme Cruz, Dos Santos was in fact in the process of separating from his wife of ten years in the lead-up to UFC 155:

If you were wondering what JDS meant when said he has personal issues prior to Cain’s rematch, he ended his 10-year marriage w/ Vilsana. 

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You Knew It Was Coming: Junior Dos Santos Cites “Personal and Kidney Issues” Behind UFC 155 Loss


(As you can tell by the above photo, Junior was feeling a little self-conscious about his looks that night as well.) 

Perhaps it’s because he’s one of the nicest guys in the sport, but we’d like to think that most MMA fans hold Junior Dos Santos to a higher standard than that of most fighters. We sure as hell do. Regardless of who you were rooting for at UFC 155, we defy you to declare that you didn’t weep for the battered former champ as he asked Joe Rogan “Why they do that?” while being met with a chorus of undeserved boos in his post-fight interview. It was like watching a child’s face sink with the unexpected revelation that that there was no Santa. On Christmas Eve.

So it is with heavy hearts that we must bring you the inevitable next chapter in the book of any fallen fighter: The Excuses. To be fair, the problems Junior cited in a recent interview with Brazil’s Esporte were not the typical kind of nonsense you’d hear from 90% of MMA fighters attempting to diagnose a loss, but the fact that we hold Junior in such high regard makes his recent allegations all the more disappointing:

Really was my head. I had some personal things going on, a bit of my attention was lacking because of it. And another thing. Soon after the fight I went to the hospital and had a scan, which showed my creatine was too high. The normal level is up to 300, mine was in 1400. I also had trouble in the urine and kidneys.

 The explanation of the doctors is that I pushed over the line, I over trained, and problems could have happened even before the fight… I was so good that I ended up crossing the line. That was the explanation of doctors. Mine is that I was not good with my head, was having personal problems and did not go well mentally in the fight. 

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Hey, Wouldn’t It Be Crazy if Daniel Cormier Got the Next Title Shot Against Jon Jones?


(Damn, Cormier at 205 pounds? Does this mean we have to stop calling him “The Round Mound of Ground and Pound”?)

It was long assumed that Daniel Cormier would enter the UFC as a heavyweight title contender after he finishes crushing Dion Staring at the final Strikeforce event on January 12th. (I’m not trying to jinx the dude, but come on, I know a squash match when I see one.) However, now that his training partner Cain Velasquez has reclaimed the heavyweight belt, Cormier’s future in the UFC may take a different path. As Dana White suggested following the post-UFC 155 press conference:

“It’s awesome, he (Cormier) is going to bring a lot of excitement to the heavyweight or light heavyweight division, you know. And he could be next in line to fight (Jon) Jones.”

Velasquez has made it clear that he wouldn’t fight his teammate under any circumstances, which might make light-heavyweight Cormier’s best option in the short term. Hell, the only thing that has kept the undefeated (and rather husky) AKA product from dropping to 205 sooner is because cutting weight crushed his Olympic dreams and nearly killed him that one time. Water under the bridge, right?

As a fantastic wrestler with dynamite punching power, Cormier would present Jon Jones with the same challenges that a guy like Dan Henderson would. But he also shares Hendo’s biggest disadvantage — his physical dimensions. Both Cormier and Henderson stand 5’11″, with 71″ reaches, and could be picked apart by the 6’4″ Jones and his inhuman 84.5″ wingspan.

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Understatement of the Day: Junior Dos Santos Says He Used “The Wrong Strategy” Against Cain Velasquez


(“Don’t worry, Junior! I can see him growing weaker with every punch! Three more rounds of this and he’ll be all yours!” / Photo via Getty Images)

We hate to even say this because he’s such a nice guy and all, but the beating Junior Dos Santos took at UFC 155 may have been the most deflating, one-sided ass-kicking in the history of UFC heavyweight title fights (other than the time that senior citizen beat the tar out Fatty McGoo, of course) and is being labeled as such by many MMA pundits out there. As one of you pointed out in our salary recap, Junior’s face mirrored one of those faces of meth posters over the course of the five round affair, yet the sumbitch still posed for photos afterwards.

As you can probably tell by now, my New Year’s resolution was to use more hyperlinks. SUCK IT, TOUCH PHONE USERS!

Aaanyway, Junior couldn’t even make it to the hospital before he was bombarded by SporTV, who thought the best time to ask a professional fighter strategy-based questions was while he was determining how much blood he had lost just hours earlier. You know, kind of like how CNN often waits until a soldier in Iraq steps on a landmine to drill him on the ins and outs of The Pincer Movement. Junior’s broken English response was as you would expect:

It (he) was better and deserved to win, but I used the wrong strategy. I was very worried about his entry in my legs and left face unprotected. So he hit me. When I was on the floor, I should have used more jiu-jitsu, I trained so much. But I tried to (get) back up, and it hurt me too, but on the ground it (he) is very good, very strong. I did not connect any punches good, even. It was bad because I was feeling very well, did a great training camp, everything was just right. But the fight is (over) anyway.

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UFC 155 Salaries: Junior Dos Santos Makes $400,000 the Hard Way


(This guy knows what I’m talking about. / Props: Reddit)

The UFC paid out $1,521,000 in reported salaries and performance bonuses to the fighters at UFC 155, according to figures released today by the Nevada State Athletic Commission. Leading the payroll was former UFC heavyweight champ Junior Dos Santos, who made a hefty $400,000 for his five-round death-march against Cain Velasquez. Velasquez landed in second place with half that total. The only other fighter who was able to crack six figures was Jim Miller, and that’s only when you factor in the $65,000 Fight of the Night bonus he earned for his three-round thriller against Joe Lauzon.

The full UFC 155 salary list is below, via MMAJunkie. Keep in mind that the numbers don’t include additional revenue from sponsorships, undisclosed “locker room bonuses,” or percentages of the pay-per-view that some of the UFC’s stars are privy to, nor do they include deductions for taxes, insurance, or licensing fees.

Cain Velasquez: $200,000 (includes $100,000 win bonus)
def. Junior Dos Santos: $400,000

Jim Miller: $147,000 (includes $41,000 win bonus, $65,000 Fight of the Night bonus)
def. Joe Lauzon: $92,000 (includes $65,000 Fight of the Night bonus)

Constantinos Philippou: $36,000 (includes $18,000 win bonus)
def. Tim Boetsch: $37,000

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