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Tag: cans

Can-Crushing Roundup: Tim Sylvia and Jong Dae Kim Win with Little Opposition


Hope you jerks are having a better Father’s Day than some of us.

Yesterday didn’t just provide us with depressing fights from former contenders. We also got to witness a fight from former champion Tim Sylvia and Jong Dae Kim attempt to win The Bob Sapp Challengeā„¢. Okay, so it was still somewhat depressing. But at least you won’t feel guilty for pointing and laughing at anyone involved, so what else can you ask for?

Tim Sylvia has been making a valiant effort to win fights and get back to the UFC as of late- although the overwhelming majority of his battles have taken place on Twitter and YouTube. Fresh off of back-to-back TKO losses to Patrick Cote and dignity, Tim Sylvia decided to do his fighting inside the cage last night against Randy Smith, a thirty-eight year old journeyman who entered the bout with a 13-10-1 professional record. A can of his caliber shouldn’t last ten seconds in the cage with a former UFC champion, yet Smith defied the odds by being knocked twelve seconds into the first round.

Impressive victory over a game opponent? Not so much. Will it take our minds off of his last effort, a forgettable decision over Andreas Kraniotakes at the abysmal Pro Elite 2: Big Guns? Trick question- we’ve blocked that fight from our memories a long time ago. Low-Quality to the point of being virtually unwatchable video after the jump? You betcha.

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Kimbo Slice’s First EliteXC Opponent Swapped, As If It Matters

Mike “The Rhino” Bourke, the 8-11-1 patsy that was scheduled to be obliterated by Kimbo Slice at the 11/10 EliteXC Renegade event in Corpus Christi, TX, has dropped off the card. Five Ounces reported today that Bourke broke his clavicle during a training session on Sunday, and was forced to pull out of the match. EliteXC has now confirmed that Kimbo’s new opponent at the event will be Bo “Redrum” Cantrell, an equally can-like 10-10-0 fighter who became a part of history on Saturday as the second consecutive guy that Brad Imes submitted by gogoplata.

Man, Elite is really hedging their bets on this one. Are they so insecure about Kimbo’s ability that they won’t put him up against a fighter with a winning record? MMA fans want to see Kimbo in an exciting fight, where he’s challenged, and they’re not going to get it this time. I couldn’t find any decent videos of Mike Bourke or Bo Cantrell in action, so here’s a Kimbo Slice highlight reel that you’ve probably already watched a dozen times. Wonderful.

(Still, that part at 0:41-0:44 where Kimbo lets the dude haul off and hit him in the face will never get old…)

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