(“I’d like to speak with my lawyer, Seraldo Babalu.”)

If Tito Ortiz is seriously thinking of acting full time after he finishes up his fight career in July, he may want to reconsider, otherwise his kids could go hungry.

Tito’s latest thespian performance can be seen tomorrow night when he appears on CSI: NY as MMA fighter Derek Petrov —  a suspect in the murder of his last opponent, who pulled a Paul Daley on him after the referee seemingly stopped the fight. As you will see in the clip below, Tito must have been suffering from a cracked skull on the set because nobody is buying his performance, which is sad since he’s basically playing himself with a different name.

(Well, at least *some* of the inevitable changes will be good.)

When it was announced today that media giant Viacom had purchased Bellator Fighting Championships, most of us probably overlooked the bigger picture of what the deal means to the landscape of MMA. At a glance, better financial backing and being on a more popular channel like Spike means better fights and bigger paychecks for fighters, but behind the scenes the scope of the deal is likely much bigger than we know and the aftershocks will be felt for some time.

Check out four of the biggest likelihoods that will come out of the purchase after the jump.

(“Maybe he was born with it. Maybe it’s Maybelline.”)

One overlooked scenario from today’s blockbuster announcement that Fox Networks has signed a seven year broadcast deal with the UFC is that Gus Johnson may somehow be involved in its UFC coverage.

Fox recently inked the sometimes MMA commentator to a multi-year commentary deal that will see the veteran football and basketball play-by-play man call a variety of Pacific-12 football and basketball games, the Cotton Bowl and football games on the Big Ten Network, which is also partly owned by Fox. He will also call about 30 BTN basketball games as well as some yet-to-be-determined college basketball games on either Fox or FX.

Hopefully for the sake of the majority of MMA fans who came to loathe the much-maligned Renzo Gracie BJJ blue belt’s oblivious Strikeforce commentary, his other duties will keep his made-up mug off of the UFC-related broadcasts, that are said to include pre and post-fight shows and a weekly or daily UFC magazine-type series.

(It will be interesting to see how Viacom’s vested interest in the company will translate into its promotion of ProElite)

By Mike Russell

It looks like the proclamation UFC president Dana White made a few months ago that CBS will likely go head-to-head with his promotion again in the near future was right on the money.

Sources close to the promotion that was recently brought back from the verge of death by Stratus Media Group, who acquired a 95 percent ownership stake of the company in June, have informed CagePotato.com that ProElite is in the final stages of negotiations for a multi-year television deal with Viacom that will see its events broadcast on both Showtime and CBS starting in the first quarter of 2012.

(How many muppets must die for Jason Miller to dress in the manner to which he’s become accustomed? Pic: ESPN)

Truly spoken like a dude who’s used to being asked to leave. Some pretty classic quotes out on Tuesday from fighter, television host and all-purpose awesome dude Jason “Mayhem” Miller re: recent reports that Strikeforce literally couldn’t find him a fight during the last year of his contract because he’d become persona non grata at both Showtime and parent network CBS. Turns out, though he knew he was in hot water after his participation in the April, 2010 Nashville brawl, nobody at any of the above corporate entities bothered to inform Mayhem that he was no longer welcome on the two television stations and – therefore – damaged goods for Strikeforce. Instead, they just put him on the shelf to rot.

“I asked, and guess what? Nobody would tell me,” Miller told MMA Fighting. “This is a political environment. Nobody’s going to tell you. They’re just going to be cowards about it. That’s the way of the world. Nobody’s going to tell the crazy ultimate fighter guy to his face, ‘Hey, screw you.’ They’re not going to do that.”

(My God, the muckraking! Pic: Strikeforce)

After being denied media access to cover last weekend’s Strikeforce: Diaz vs. Daley for CBS Sports (and apparently buying a ticket and going anyway), longtime reporter Loretta Hunt conducted a video chat with fellow scribe Jason Probst on Monday to discuss the ongoing banishment of many of the sport’s best-known journalists from events controlled by the UFC. We missed it, but since Zuffa, LLC’s brazen efforts to marginalize media it doesn’t deem friendly enough to its own interests is perhaps the biggest story consistently ignored by “credentialed” MMA sites (for obvious reasons, right?), we figure some of it needs repeating.

For starters, Hunt claims the honchos at CBS Sports are not impressed that Zuffa continues to conduct media relationships like a 13-year-old girl deciding who can ride the pony at her birthday party. It appears that heavy-hitters like CBS are used to a certain amount of professionalism from the entities they cover and the UFC obviously sorely lacks in that department. Zuffa has been such a pain in the ass that Hunt says CBS might just chuck it the fuck-it bucket and stop covering MMA entirely. So, that seems counterproductive. Her quotes – with props to Fight Opinion for the original transcriptions — and some of our own musings are after the jump …

("CBS? They suck. I’m not sure I want to work with them anymore.")

During today’s Strikeforce: Henderson vs. Babalu conference call, the promotion’s CEO Scott Coker touched on some pressing questions, but was noticeably mum on others.

"You’re going to see big things," Coker teased when speaking of the California-based promotion’s plans for next year, but he didn’t say whether or not a return to CBS is in Strikeforce’s stacked deck of cards. In an interview he did earlier this month with Sherdog, Coker said that a reputable TV deal would have to be in place for him to entertain a co-promotion deal with the promotions, which could be a telling sign that CBS has taken his number off of speed dial.

He did mentione Showtime when discussing the ongoing, yet unfruitful negotiations with Fedor Emelianenko’s M-1 Global management team, but didn’t give a clue about the status of Strikeforce’s relationship with CBS, which many assume is dead in the water thanks to the Team Cesar Gracie-Jason Miller brawl that took place during their last telecast in April.

"It’s been quite a long road here with the M-1 camp trying to get this done. I agree with [M-1 director of operations] Evgeni [Kogan] that there’s some light at the end of the tunnel," Coker explained. "We would welcome Fedor to have a long term deal with Strikeforce fighting on Showtime and we’re trying to get this done. It’s not done yet, there’s nothing signed. So really there’s nothing to announce."

(Praying works better if you bow your head and close your eyes, Scott)

According to Strikeforce CEO Scott Coker, his promotion has not been in touch with broadcast partner CBS since the post-fight brawl that occurred at the tail end of the Strikeforce: Nashville event April 17.

Now, I’m no business expert, but I have some management and PR experience and one thing I’m pretty sure that is a paramount component to every successful business relationship is open two-way communication. If it were me, I would have been on the phone with CBS that Monday to set up a debriefing to discuss the incident, what went wrong and how we should move forward. 
Instead, it seems that Strikeforce is taking the don’t ask don’t tell, head in the sand technique, which likely won’t end well as time passes and CBS starts to wonder what the hell is going on.

(Props: MMA Payout) 

Last week, CBS started airing TV spots like this one during the NCAA men’s basketball tournament to promote Strikeforce: Nashville. While it’s good that they’re getting some visibility among sports fans, the ads themselves leave a little to be desired. Let’s break it down:

— Does the ad look like it was filmed in one location in less than a half-hour? Check.

— Is Dan Henderson introduced as "one of the most decorated fighters in MMA history," while Jake Shields is simply introduced as "Jake Shields"? That’s a bingo.

— Are cheesy sound effects added when the fighters are hitting the heavy bag? Indeed.

— Does the swooping edit of Dan Henderson entering the frame at 0:12 make you laugh? LOL, yes.

— Is Dan’s delivery of "I’m comin’ for that belt" strangely passionless? Unfortunately so.

— Are the other two title fights on the card mentioned anywhere? Nah, son.

— Does it end with a Chad Kroeger-esque singer going "yeaaaaaah"? Man, does it ever.

(Werdum displays some riveting mic skills in this interview with Ariel Helwani.)

Strikeforce CEO Scott Coker told reporters at the post-fight press conference on Saturday night that Fedor Emelianenko’s next fight would most likely be against Fabricio Werdum on the April 2010 CBS show. As in, the same Werdum who recently won a lackluster decision over “Bigfoot” Silva, and got dropped from the UFC after getting dropped by a monster uppercut from Junior Dos Santos. In case you can’t tell, this isn’t the huge Fedor fight we were hoping Strikeforce would put together for their next CBS offering. With Alistair Overeem still MIA and a dearth of other heavyweights ready to step up to the big time, a guy on a two-fight win streak may really be the best they can do by April.

But if you thought it was tough to do a network TV promotional push with Brett Rogers doing all the work as the only fluent English-speaker in the main event, get ready for things to become even more difficult. Werdum doesn’t exactly speak the King’s English, and selling a fight between an inscrutable Russian and a fairly bland Brazilian to casual sports fans via a series of translators and facial expressions is no easy task. Maybe they can hype this thing through interpretive dance?

(Don’t get too chummy, Berlusconi. Fedor only came to this thing because Putin told him there would be ice cream.  He’s been patient so far, but his patience has limits.)

CBS was so happy with how well their first Strikeforce event turned out, they’re going to do it again.  Eventually.  MMA Weekly reports that CBS is eyeing April 2010 as their next date for live MMA action, and they want both Fedor Emelianenko and Dan Henderson on the fight card.  Probably not against each other, though.  That would be insane.

According to CBS senior executive vice president Kelly Kahl, they are "looking at a few different dates" but after the ratings the last Strikeforce show did they "look forward to being back in the cage."

As excited as we’ll be to see both Fedor and Hendo fighting for free on CBS once April rolls around (assuming we make it through the winter without being eaten by wolves, and we never assume that), that puts a five-month gap between Strikeforce’s network TV events.  We can’t help but pose the question: is that really the kind of scheduling pace that builds brand loyalty?  Sure, it gives them time to stack the card using the full might of Strikeforce’s roster, but at this rate they’ll only do about two network TV events a year.  Is that the kind of thing that builds a fanbase, or just tries to quickly exploit whatever existing fanbase is already there? 

(I think we all know what the young male audience was tuning in to see: Randy Couture’s brilliant and intoxicating smile. Props: MMA TKO)

Spike TV is a lot like those jerks who you play in a fantasy football league with.  There’s always one sure way to know when they did better than you, and it’s by checking your email inbox.  Spike sent out another email today touting the triumph of UFC 105 over Strikeforce on CBS, at least among a few key demographics.  According to Spike, UFC 105 drew an average of 2.9 million viewers on Saturday, which is considerably less than the 4.04 million that Strikeforce averaged.  UFC 105 peaked with 3.7 million viewers during the main event, whereas Strikeforce had 5.46 million watching Brett Rogers get his head knocked off. 

But just because they technically lost the overall ratings battle to a network TV event (which is expected), doesn’t mean they can’t hype their own numbers in the young male demographic that the UFC and Spike TV collectively own.  Just check out this handy breakdown they provided:

(Look familiar? Photo courtesy of this set on Combat Lifestyle.)

Though the entire broadcast of "Strikeforce: Fedor vs. Rogers" averaged 4.04 million viewers — placing it behind Kimbo-headlined CBS cards like "EliteXC: Primetime" (4.85 million viewers) and "EliteXC: Heat" (4.56 million viewers) — the ratings for Saturday night’s card shot up during the main event. MMA Weekly reports that 5.46 million home viewers were in attendance between 11:00 p.m. and 11:15 p.m., making the Emelianenko vs. Rogers match the ninth-most-watched fight in U.S. MMA history. You can check out this slightly outdated list to see where that puts them, but basically, the fight fell just 15,000 viewers short of Michael Bisping vs. Matt Hamill, and about 1.8 million viewers short of the reigning champion, Kimbo vs. James Thompson. Senior Executive Vice President of CBS Primetime Kelly Kahl was pleased with the numbers:

Not coincidentally, the 11:00-11:15 p.m. block coincides with the time when the UFC’s "Main Events" broadcast on Spike had just ended — so a large part of the bump could be attributed to MMA fans switching from one channel to another. (No word yet on how Spike did that night.) The question is: Can Fedor draw even better ratings in his next CBS appearance, now that he’s more of a known quantity? Will he ever approach — dare we say it — Kimbo-esque levels of stardom?

(Photo courtesy of FightMagazine.com, where total Midwest mark Neal Taflinger makes the case for more MMA shows in the Midwest. Weird.)

Sometimes – not often, but every once in a while – I really wish Dana White would change up his script just a little bit.  Nothing drastic.  He doesn’t have to call Shinya Aoki the world’s best lightweight or insist that there’s plenty of room for all promotions under the big tent of MMA.  But maybe just once he could offer a reaction to a competitor’s event that isn’t painfully predictable.  For instance, he could say that he enjoyed it, or even that he just totally forgot it was on.  You know, get passive-aggressive instead of aggressive-aggressive for a change. 

It may happen one day, but today is not that day.  When asked by the L.A. Times what he thought of Strikeforce, their ratings, and Fedor Emelianenko, it was like somebody had just pulled DW’s string:

“CBS would be out of their mind to put that rinky-dink [Strikeforce] . . . on the air again . . . and without that backing, [promoters] won’t have the money to pay [Emelianenko]. …The guy just got his face smashed in by Brett Rogers. Do you know what Brock or Frank Mir and Cain Velasquez would do to Brett Rogers?  It’s time to bring this guy [Fedor] in, to see Brock Lesnar smash his head.”

(‘I don’t want to freak you out or anything, Brett. But having you here in my arms, it just feels right, doesn’t it?’ Photo courtesy of SI.com)

After a brief layoff for scheduled maintenance to its supercomputer, the Potato Index is back to sort through the winners and losers of Saturday night’s Strikeforce event on CBS with its arbitrary numerical rankings system.  Huzzah!

Fedor Emelianenko +86
It’s hard to get a big boost in the Index when you’re a 5-1 favorite going into the fight, but he delivered with another right hand murderball, and even gave the casual fans a little blood for their trouble.  But were the ratings good enough to get CBS’s attention?

Brett Rogers +4
So he didn’t shock the world.  Honestly, who expected him to?  He still landed some good shots and took a couple as well, but the biggest positive for him is how he performed on the mat.  He’s still got some improvements to make, but he showed that he’s not all hype and a trendy haircut.

Here’s the video of last night’s Strikeforce main event on CBS for those of you who, like me, relied on your DVR to record the entirety of last night’s event, only to become enraged when the recording cut out early in the first round.  Or if you just couldn’t tear yourself away from another gripping episode of "America’s Most Wanted," that’s cool too.  Who knows?  One of these days you might see your neighbor on there.  Then won’t you be glad you missed things like awesome fights and the weddings of family members in order to stay home and stare at fugitives on TV.

(Brett Rogers is going to miss this world, and everything in it.)

With Strikeforce on CBS — which we’ll be liveblogging, naturally — just a day away, we put the meager power of our two brains together to see if we can’t figure out a thing or two about what’s going to happen when Fedor Emelianenko and Brett Rogers get their scrap on in Chicago, and what it will all mean once it’s over.

What would Brett Rogers have to do to convince you that he’s the best heayweight in the world?  Is simply winning enough?

BF: No, sad as it is to admit, beating the world’s best heavyweight would not be enough.  If Rogers were to throw one big right hand that knocked Emelianenko out cold and left his entourage of bearded priests and shady hangers-on with their mouths agape, by the time he made it to the post-fight press conference people would already be whispering the dreaded f-word – fluke.  My gut tells me Rogers wouldn’t really give a damn.  He’d take his check and his undefeated record and publicly declare that both us and our rankings can all kiss his ass, and I wouldn’t blame him one bit. 

On Saturday night Jason “Mayhem” Miller will get his chance to fight for a title on network TV in front of an American audience that might only recognize him as the “Bully Beatdown” guy.  He’s just fine with that, but damn if he can figure out why Jake Shields is the betting favorite in this fight.  I spoke with Miller for an SI.com feature earlier this week, and, as usual, he was at no loss for words.  On every topic from Shields’ stand-up game to medication and cliff notes, “Mayhem” has an opinion.  He’d like to go ahead and share them with you, if you don’t mind.

BF: First off, I have a bone to pick with you.

JM: What did you just call me?

We met this summer at UFC 100 when the whole Fight Magazine crew was hanging out in Vegas, and you and I had what I thought was a pleasant conversation.  Then I read your column in Fight the next month and you referred to that specific conversation while referring to me as a “chisel-faced zombie.”

Well, are you?

I guess I have kind of a square head, but zombie?

Hell man, I don’t know.  Maybe.  If the shoe fits.

Okay, fair enough.  Let’s talk about your fight.  Last time I checked, Shields was a pretty heavy favorite against you.   

Yeah, I know.  I’m shocked.  I really am.  But he’s on a pretty good streak, so I guess I understand.

(Where do you even begin trying to explain this to him? Photo courtesy of M-1Global.com)

It’s one thing for a network executive to sit down with a reporter from an MMA media outlet and say the right things.  We’re not that hard to please, after all, and our expectations are sufficiently low.  Just don’t call it Ultimate Fighting or human cockfighting and we’re generally satisfied.  But what about when they talk to other media outlets, the ones who might be asking them, ‘Seriously, what’s with this Ultimate Fighting stuff you guys are running?’ 

Kelly Kahl of CBS spoke with MarketWatch – the kind of website that follows up mention of any public company with that company’s current stock quote – about the network’s decision to try another go-round with MMA, and Kahl offered an interesting perspective we might not have previously considered.  To hear him tell it, they might as well give it a shot, because young men aren’t watching a lot of CBS on their Saturday nights as it is:

(The latest Fedor/Rogers video promo, courtesy of YouTube.com/CBS. Props to MMA Fanhouse for the tip.)

Just as HBO uses the 24/7 series to plug notable boxing matches, Showtime has launched its own behind-the-scenes hype series with Fight Camp 360, which debuted October 10th with a profile on the Super Six World Boxing Classic. But 360 won’t be limited to just boxing. According to Brett Rogers, Showtime is preparing an episode of the show to promote Strikeforce: Fedor vs. Rogers, slated to air about a week before their November 7th fight.

Of course, that event will air on CBS, not Showtime. But Showtime is owned by CBS Corporation, and it’s the network outlet for most of Strikeforce’s events, so it’s in their best interest to pitch in with the promotional effort, which has taken a while to warm up. But hey, better late than never — and it’s great to see MMA fighters start to get the "all-access" treatment before big fights. Though if you’re one of the Showtime video producers who has to fly to Stary Oskol and freeze your ass off while shooting some B-roll of a new swingset being installed at Fedor’s training facility, our condolences…

(Props: MMA Fanhouse)

Here we are, three weeks away from the big Fedor Emelianenko-Brett Rogers Strikeforce fight in Chicago, and CBS is starting to put some of its promotional muscle behind the event.  But here’s the problem: how do you hype a guy who most Americans have never heard of when he doesn’t speak much English and you don’t own any of his fight footage?  You basically have two choices: you can show him working out while flashing various quotes about how great he is, or you can film a commercial where he fights an entire pride of lions in the big cement pit behind Vadim Finkelchtein’s house.  For reasons that I’ll never quite understand, CBS has decided to go with the first option.  Whatever.  They’re the ones who’ll have to live with that regret.

(Props: CageWriter)

Maybe Dana White locked himself in a bathroom at some point after hearing that Fedor vs. Rogers would be broadcast on CBS, and screamed until he cried. But at least he’s putting on a brave face for the media. Following a UFC 103 press conference held yesterday, White told Steve Cofield that Strikeforce on CBS is not a game-changer:

No, probably not. EliteXC reportedly hemorrhaged money during their run on CBS, because the license fee they received from the network wasn’t nearly enough to cover their expenses. Maybe Strikeforce was able to carve out a more satisfying deal than EliteXC did, but you have to assume that Strikeforce’s actual end-game is to build up enough interest in their brand on CBS that they can start putting on pay-per-view shows, which would theoretically be much more profitable. Until that happens, Dana White has enough problems of his own to worry about.

After purchasing “select assets” including fighter contracts from Pro Elite last week, Strikeforce quickly went from a surprisingly successful regional promotion to a major player in the MMA scene almost overnight.  In this exclusive interview CEO Scott Coker talks about the deal and the acquisitions, as well as what his organization has planned for its new talent.

CagePotato.com:  Thanks for talking with me, Scott.  Since you purchased the fighter contracts, how has the transition been going?  Do you find that the fighters are eager to fight for Strikeforce now?

I’ll tell you, we’ve had about twenty or so, or about half of the roster, that we’ve reached out to as of this morning and had good conversations about scheduling and match-ups.  I think that, at the end of the day, a lot of these guys just want to get back to work and get back to fighting so they can continue their careers.  So I’d say the transition has been going well.

What about any fighters who might have been hoping to get free of their Pro Elite contracts and sign with the UFC?

I’ve only had that conversation with one fighter.  And we’ve had two or three conversations with that fighter since, and now I think they may be feeling a different way than they were before.  And I can understand the frustration that a lot of these fighters are feeling, because they’ve been out of work for a while.  Not everybody fought on the last show in October.  Some of them haven’t fought since June or July of last year.  

We dealt with that frustration at the very beginning and we understood where it was coming from, but a lot of these guys I’ve known for a long time, their managers are friends of mine, so I think the ice has all been broken.  And the fighter who was originally looking to go to the UFC is now saying, ‘Do you think I could fight by May?’  So I think they see what we’re doing and it’s going to be okay.

(Will brawl for food.)

Now that Strikeforce is getting its Pro Elite ducks in a row, we’re all wondering what, if anything, they’ll decide to do with Kimbo Slice.  He was an undeniable draw for EliteXC, but he also came with a hefty price tag that was maybe, just maybe, not justified by his performance in the cage, particularly in his last fight against Seth Petruzelli.

Strikeforce CEO Scott Coker seems sympathetic to the plight of the internet brawler, but perhaps not so much that he’s willing to keep paying him the six-figure salary Pro Elite did:

“I think that if you look back at the past, he could have been built up to have the fights that he needed to face the Seth Petruzellis of the world and be successful, but he wasn’t given the opportunity,” said Coker. “When I look at Kimbo, I don’t look at it as his fault. He was in a ‘no win’ situation.”

Kimbo’s manager, “Icey” Mike Imber, indicated that while he wasn’t enthusiastic about a pay-cut for his fighter, he’d consider it rather than keep him out of action indefinitely.  But one thing’s for sure, Bas Rutten will not be training Slice.  Ever.

(More headkicking in store for Shamrock in ’09?)

Ever since Strikeforce purchased “select assets” from Pro Elite we’ve been wondering a) which select assets, and b) what the hell does he plan to do with them?  In an interview with USA Today, Coker inched closer to answering those questions, saying he’s spoken with 10 Pro Elite fighters and only one of them has tried to renegotiate his deal (we assume this was Kimbo Slice insisting he take a pay cut and be place on the untelevised undercard).  

Coker also said he “would like to invite K.J. Noons to fight [Strikeforce lightweight champ]" Josh Thomson, and added that he’s in talks with Noons’ agent, Mark Dion, to make that happen. 

You’ll recall that Noons essentially turned his back on EliteXC when they tried to make him fight Nick Diaz on CBS and Noons was unhappy with the payscale and with rematching Diaz in general, who was slated to make more than him despite losing the first meeting due to a cut stoppage.  Thomson is a quality, name opponent, and if Noons decides he doesn’t want to fight him either, we in the MMA world would probably do well to forget about “King” Karl altogether and let him box his little heart out.

As for other fights on Coker’s mind right now…

(Ken Shamrock: master of the silly face staredown.)

Frank Shamrock won’t stop talking about how much he wants to fight his older brother. In fact, the older and slower Ken Shamrock becomes, the more Frank seems to want a bout with him. Weird. Now the adopted brothers are telling ESPN.com that the bout is basically a done deal, while the ever-questionable Head of Operations for EliteXC, Jeremy Lappen, sounds more cautious.

The reasons EliteXC will probably end up making this fight are obvious. At least, they’re obvious once you consider the way EliteXC thinks. The fight has a “cool hook,” according to Frank, and that’s more than enough for the people who brought us Kimbo Slice-Tank Abbott. The reasons they might not make it happen? How about a mix of financial concerns and worries over whether Ken will be engaging in any headbutting contests the day of the fight and end up pulling out at the last minute again.

Beyond those obvious risks, here are several other reasons why we can do without Shamrock vs. Shamrock.

1. It’s eight years too late. The time to make this fight was when both guys were at or at least near the top of their game. Frank’s last great moment was his victory over Tito Ortiz in 1999. Since then he’s been reluctant to fight genuinely dangerous opponents, and has usually come out on the losing end when he does. Ken had a good showing in a decision loss against Don Frye in 2002, then started to go downhill shortly after. At this point, what does it matter who wins? Obviously, it will be Frank, but still, so what? It’s meaningless beyond the tepid personal grudge, which brings me to…

(One of those days where it really sucks to have just one waist.)

Frank Shamrock has yet to encounter a situation that is not, at its core, about Frank Shamrock. It just hasn’t happened. It probably never will happen. The main event at EliteXC: Heat last Saturday night is a great example. You remember that one, right?

Kimbo Slice was set to face Ken Shamrock, but instead squared off against (and was quickly defeated by) Seth Petruzelli. You might have seen it. What you probably didn’t know at the time was that this situation was all about Frank Shamrock. He was the grown man with braces calling the fight for CBS. But really, he should have been in there fighting. If he had, MMA history could have been altered. At least, that’s the story he told Sherdog:

“I think it was a mistake to not let me fight [Kimbo Slice],” said Shamrock, who claims he offered to step in to face the notorious streetfighter.

[...]

“When I realized we would have to cancel the show, I said, ‘Look, I’ll fight the guy. You know, it’s a great story — little brother steps into the spot, comes out of the booth. It’s very compelling, but we need a fight to happen that’s compelling,’” Frank said. “That went around for hours. Then I put my shirt on and went to work. No one committed to it, so I just kept talking.”

Of course you did, Frank. Because that’s what you do. A lot of talking, and occasionally some fighting.

(‘CBS, man, let me hold twenty bucks.’)

We all knew that CBS was getting more and more involved with EliteXC’s possibly illegal operations, but according to a recent SEC filing (dug up by the intrepid lads at MMA Payout) they are now officially bankrolling entire events. At least, that’s what they did with the Oct. 4 show after EliteXC told them they were “unable to deliver” the event under the current terms of the agreement:

Accordingly, the Company and CBS agreed to amend the Agreement whereby CBS would assume all expenses for the event and receive all revenue from the event. CBS advanced the estimated event costs according to an agreed upon budget in order for the Company to pay expenses related to the event. Additionally, the Company and CBS waived mutual exclusivity under the Agreement for the Sunrise Event.

So not only is CBS paying the cost to put on EliteXC events, they’re also taking all the revenue and dropping it straight into their coffers. Now, I’m no financial expert, but isn’t this basically the same as the relationship between a pimp and a prostitute? CBS funds the operation. EliteXC puts on the show. Then EliteXC has to give all the money to daddy. In return, maybe CBS buys EliteXC something shiny and pretty at the mall on Sunday.

I know that relationship is as old as civilization itself, but it doesn’t sound like such a good deal if you’re EliteXC.

(Just think of what might have been. Or better yet, don’t think about it. Ever.)

Oh, Ken Shamrock. Somehow the controversy over whether you cut yourself on purpose or whether you were just unlucky/dumb has been overshadowed in the past few days by other EliteXC controversies. It’s almost as if people have completely forgotten that it was supposed to be you who got paid extra to stand and trade with Kimbo Slice. Instead, you didn’t make a dime and ended up being but a footnote in this sad spectacle.

But fear not, MMA fans, for Ken Shamrock has composed (read: asked someone to write for him) an open letter explaining what went on this past Saturday and what he’d like to do about it. Take it away, Ken:

On October 4th, I was set to fight Kimbo Slice on the EliteXC/CBS Saturday Night Fights in a highly anticipated event. Unfortunately, because of a training accident and the intervention of the Florida State Boxing Commission, our fight did not happen. I suffered a cut above my left eye that required six stitches, and the cut was significant enough to cause the Florida State Boxing Commission to refuse to allow me to fight.

The scheduled bout with Kimbo on the EliteXC/CBS Saturday Night Fight card was a great opportunity, and it is unfortunate that I was unable to face Kimbo as planned. I want to apologize to all of my fans, and to the EliteXC and CBS executives who worked so hard to put this fight together. I also want to apologize to Kimbo, Bas Rutten and their entire camp for what happened. I recognize that I put them in a very bad situation, particularly Kimbo. It’s difficult to walk into the ring after training for one opponent only to find out hours before the fight that you have to face some you don’t know or have never seen fight.

(What bonus?)

Benji Radach led off the CBS portion of Elite XC: Heat with an exciting second-round knockout of “Ninja” Rua, but says he was never informed by Elite XC officials before the bout that there was even the possibility of a ‘knockout of the night’ bonus, as Seth Petruzelli says he received for felling Kimbo Slice.

“No, not at all,” Radach said, when asked whether Elite XC officials ever mentioned knockout, submission, or fight of the night bonuses, before or after the event. “I wish there was a bonus because I think my fight was really exciting, maybe fight of the night or knockout of the night. But nope, I never heard anything.”

This contradicts Petruzelli’s claim that Elite XC mentioned the post-fight bonuses before the event, which caused him to stand and strike with Kimbo in the hopes of notching the knockout of the night.

That clarification came after Petruzelli seemed to suggest, during a radio interview with Monsters in the Morning, that he’d been paid extra by Elite XC to keep the fight with Kimbo standing. Petruzelli then said the extra money was simply for a knockout bonus, and was for the same amount as the submission of the night and fight of the night bonuses.

There’s been as of yet no word from Elite XC on which fighters received these other bonuses, just as there has been little mention of these bonuses in past Elite XC events.

Update: Elite XC’s Jeremy Lappen tells Josh Gross that some fighter contracts have KO bonuses built into them and some don’t. Submission bonuses, however, are a myth in Elite XC:

“We’re just trying to create exciting fights,” Lappen said, doing some spinning of his own. “Fast-paced energy fights. It’s just something we’ve always done.”

EliteXC, it seems, does not view submissions, widely thought of as the most technical aspect of MMA, as an overly important portion of an exciting fight.

“We don’t give submission bonuses,” Lappen said. But Petruzelli “knew a knockout bonus was possible before the fight.”