(The fact that Jones stomped that rabbit to death seconds after this photo was taken did not get him any new fans either.) 

By Nathan “The12ozCurls” Smith

There are a couple of taboo topics at your local watering hole: religion and politics. These two subjects bring out the best and worst in people because the issues are argued with both an intense passion for one’s belief and ire against another’s. Both sides are unwilling to concede the debate, and when you mix in a few cocktails, it ultimately ends in name calling and/or fisticuffs. But among MMA fans, a third topic has already been added to the unwritten “Banned-Bar-Conversation-List.” I’m speaking, of course, about Jon Jones.

Over the past several days, CP has posted not one, not two, but three pieces concerning Jones and his arrest for allegedly driving under the influence of alcohol. The UFC light-heavyweight champion’s arrest was justifiably big news, and both his supporters and detractors took to the comments section to voice their opinions; the Bones-lovers came with a shield to defend Jones and the haters came with party favors to celebrate his misfortune. Here are a few representative comments left by some of you…

SquidInk
Jones haters, what’s it like being so fucking perfect?

Darkside
Everybody falls down eventually. But, that fall hurts a lot more when it’s off of your high horse.

Brobafett
oh god someone drove drunk!!!!??? what a horrible person…blah blah blah. Who gives a fuck? Its stupid he even has to apologize, he already killed his Bentley what else do you want?

(Negative side effects of TRT: Bacne. Positive side effects: Falcon Punch.) 

My God, today’s NSAC meeting, which determined both Chael Sonnen’s future ability to continue legal injecting steroids testosterone replacement therapy and Nick Diaz’s minimum retirement length was like watching Lawrence of Arabia, twice, minus all of the train explosions and shots of interesting desert landscapes. To describe the six hour hearing in a word: humdrum. Thankfully, we’ll be much briefer in summing up what went down.

To kick off the afternoon, Sonnen was successful in achieving a therapeutic use exemption for testosterone replacement therapy, and now joins the like of Dan Henderson, Todd Duffee, and Shane Roller in the select group of MMA fighters to receive an exemption from the Nevada State Athletic Commission. As far as interesting developments go, Sonnen admitted that he injected himself with testosterone, stating, ”I administer two times a week, every Sunday and Thursday. It’s self-injected intermusculatory and [I] consider it to be a prescription.” When Commissioner Pat Lundvall asked why Sonnen had never listed using testosterone on his medical forms over the past few years, Sonnen stated that he was under the impression that it wasn’t something that needed to be disclosed. He also stated under oath that he “has never taken anabolic steroids.”

In another interesting moment, which took place before the hearing truly began, Keith Kizer likened TRT to “the new Viagra” as doctors continue to push it on the population and that “Therapuetic Use Exemptions do not allow you to test outside of normal ranges. It only allows for presence of synthetics.” Does this make Sonnen TRT’s Smiling Bob? Only time will tell.

(This tender moment is brought to you by the word: clownshoe.) 

As we mentioned earlier this week, Chael Sonnen is basically the living reincarnation of the legend of Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde. He has the capability to come off as a reasonable individual, but more often than not, he chooses to drink that devilish potion, the proceeding surge of bravado almost always coming at the cost of his sanity. Where as Dr. Jekyll becomes a prostitute murdering madman upon drinking said potion, Sonnen reverts into a compulsive liar on such a ridiculous level — spouting claims of certain cycling legends and PED use — that he all but but erases the belief that he is one of the more intelligent figures in the sport today.

Take his recent interview with Jim Rome, in which he discussed his upcoming title fight with Anderson Silva, set for UFC 148 on July 7th. As he did while on “The Joe Rogan Experience,” Sonnen talked about the perceived danger of accepting the rematch in Brazil (as was the original plan) as well as his claims that Silva is a “fake Brazilian.” But you don’t start to smell the fish, so to speak, until his UFC 117 loss to Silva is brought up. After Rome gives the viewers a quick recap of the fight, Sonnen drops this beauty on us:

I am so happy you brought that up for the viewers who may not have seen this…what had happened was an absolute misunderstanding and misapplication of the rules by me. We’re in the fifth and final round, he locks on a submission, and I acknowledge that he has it tight by slapping my hand on his leg.

I tapped. So what I thought is you go to the cards. I win four rounds, he wins that round. Apparently, if you tap, it ends the entire contest, which I was not ever made privy to.

Jesus f’ing Christ. Words cannot even begin to describe the amount of facepalm that is necessary for that aneurysm-inducing bit of drivel. It is as if he is having a four-year old with a inoperable brain tumor scribble out his interview answers in crayon, knowing damn well that the child does not posses the ability to spell “inoperable” or “crayon.” Bill Clinton could not dream up a more ham-fisted response if you were to give him the third runner-up of Miss Plus America, an empty hotel room, and all the time in the world.

Join us after a jump for a play-by-play of the rest of the interview and a full video. 

(Little did Zach Galifianakis know that this would be the most awkward episode of “Between Two Ferns” to date.) 

As has become public knowledge by this point, there are two sides to Chael Sonnen. Two sides that, while vastly different from one another, combine to form a charismatic, well-spoken, yet incredibly polarizing mixed martial artist. The fact that Sonnen manages to effortlessly shift between these two paradigms when hyping a fight, giving a post-fight interview, or relentlessly tearing apart a Canadian reporter is only a testament to his ability to enthrall while repelling, to pique one’s interest while simultaneously drawing their ire. This may sound like a bit of “nut-hugging” as the MMA blogosphere likes to so eloquently put it, but there’s no denying that Sonnen is truly a unique individual, and one who could sell a ketchup Popsicle to a woman in white gloves without batting an eye.

But the Chael Sonnen that sat down with Joe Rogan as part of his infamous (as far as podcasts go) “The Joe Rogan Experience” was not the fight-hyping, pro rasslin’ “Oregon Gangster” that many fans can’t bear the sight of. Instead, for over two and a half hours, Rogan managed a feat that perhaps no other interviewer, journalist, or low-level blogger has even come close to: He managed to bring out the sincerity in Chael Sonnen.

And it was nothing short of fascinating.

Not fascinating in a “what’s he going to say next?” kind of way, but rather in a “man behind the myth” kind of way, and to put it simply, it stands above any other Chael Sonnen interview I personally have ever seen. The two dished on everything from Sonnen’s turning point as an MMA fighter (which came as a result of hypnotherapy, believe it or not), to Dan Severn’s infamously terrible work against Shannon Ritch, to Chris Leben’s batshit crazy childhood. But none of it felt forced, or fabricated. The Chael Sonnen that sat down with Rogan was endearing, empathetic, and above all else, realistic, and a kudos is due to Rogan for managing to bring that out of him.

Check out the full podcast after the jump. 

(How ignorant we were.) 

Chances are, if Chael Sonnen is not training for an upcoming fight or doing battle inside the octagon itself, he is sitting down in front of a camera and ranting about whatever is on his mind, be it Anderson Silva or the irresponsibility of Canadian reporters. As far as he’s concerned, these rants are meant to provide his audience with a higher understanding of the world around them, and are in the general public’s better interest. Thankfully, Sonnen was able to fight off the schizophrenia that will inevitably overtake his brain for long enough to jot down a collection of these rants into a “self help” book subtly titled “The Voice of Reason.” To say that it is the greatest collection of words and sentences ever committed to paper would be an understatement, so Sonnen opts to call it “A V.I.P pass to enlightenment” instead.

But just in case you didn’t pick up “The Voice of Reason” at your nearest bookstore (or in today’s society, on your Kindle), Sonnen recently locked himself in a dark and dreary basement to elaborate on everything from John McCain’s attempt to crush MMA before it got its sea legs to the conspiracies behind Area 51 and professional wrestling. Are these three things somehow related? Is Chael Sonnen some rogue government agent who has access to this kind of information? Is the Oregonian truly the UFC middleweight champion of the world, and we just don’t know it yet? To put it simply; no, maybe, and DUH.

Join us after the jump for the videos. 

UFC President Dana White says that Bellator import, Hector Lombard, might just get a middleweight title shot if he beats Brian Stann in his UFC debut. “When you talk about cleaning out a division, there’s always another guy who comes up, even for a guy like Anderson…We just brought in Lombard. (If) Lombard beats Stann. … that (title) fight makes sense,” Sergio Non reports White as saying, for USA Today.

And, oh yeah, Stann vs. Lombard will headline UFC on Fox 4, according to MMA Fighting ace Mike Chiappetta. When a fan asked Chiappetta, via twitter, if the fight was set to be the main event for Fox’ fourth UFC installment, he replied in the affirmative.

(Josh Koscheck owns a plane? A fucking plane?? [*cracks another bottle of whiskey*] / Video courtesy of YouTube/FuelTV)

- ‘Ultimate Fighter’ Winner Ross Pearson Arrested On Suspicion Of DUI (Fightline)

- Gina Carano’s ‘Haywire’ Is Out Now on DVD/Blu-ray (Amazon)

- The Case for Public Fighter Pay (MMAFighting)

- Jon Jones Likely Won’t Return to Fight Dan Henderson Until August or September (BleacherReport/MMA)

- ‘The Ultimate Fighter: Live’ Ratings: Episode No. 8 Draws Series-Worst 929K Viewers (MMAJunkie)

- Video of Brazilian Media Trying to Pull a Prank on Chael Sonnen and Failing Horribly (MiddleEasy)

- Former NFL Linebacker Junior Seau Found Dead, Suicide Suspected (Deadspin)

- 25 Photos Of Girls Being Jealous Of Other Girls (WorldWideInterweb)

- Mastering the Top 10 Athletic Movements (MensFitness)

- 5 Energy Intensive Ways to Be Lazy (DoubleViking)

- Grandmas Watch Kim Kardashian’s Sex Tape. “Two hands with space in the middle.” (Filmdrunk)

- How to Start a Third Political Party (HolyTaco)

(Urijah’s lowest moment as an MMA fan? One can only ponder…)

This weekend, the UFC will make its glorious return to the only network that can bash gay rights and advertise Glee within the same half hour. We’re talking about FOX, of course. Featuring Jim Miller vs. Nate Diaz in a probable number one lightweight contender bout, a grudge match between Josh Koscheck and Johny Hendricks (because every fight with Kos is inherently a grudge match), a fight that will more than likely require the use of a stretcher, and a heavyweight sure-to-be-slugfest between Pat Barry and Lavar Johnson, it’s looking like UFC on FOX 3 has the potential to erase the memories of a rather forgettable second event and a rather brief first one. Not that we were complaining, because free fights are free fights.

And to get us hyped for the event, Dana White recently released one of his patented Danavlogs in which he catches Urijah Faber ogling over himself while on the set of TUF 15. It makes TOTAL SENSE if you don’t think about it. We gotta admit though, watching The Baldfather giggle like a school girl at Urijah’s expense makes us long for the days of his shock pen pranks that we came to know and love. [*looks over shoulder nostalgically and sighs*] 

Check out the video after the jump. 

(Props: MMAInsideTheCageTV. The quote in question comes around the 6:20 mark.)

Our buds at MMA Inside the Cage caught up with #1 UFC middleweight contender Chael Sonnen following his pre-UFC 145 Q&A in Atlanta last week, and got his take on a number of hot topics, including the ongoing Alistair Overeem saga and his upcoming fight with Anderson Silva. Because Cyrus Fees is a thorough and incisive journalist, he asked the Voice of Reason author to weigh in on the recent CagePotato caption that completely blew up in our faces. As Chael put it:

“These guys, in my belief, meant it as a joke. What was in their heart, only they know. I believe they meant that as a joke. HOWEVER…you’ve gotta understand that the headquarters is in Las Vegas, which is the gambling capital of the world. The owners of the UFC own casinos, this is extremely against the rules to do something like that, and you just can’t even joke about it. So for Dana to get really upset — you really need to understand the history that’s involved, and once you do that, I think the guys should have just laid down and said ‘we screwed up.’ I think their apology was a little bit weak, and Dana’s only human. You give him a good solid response, no matter how wrong you are, you give him a good solid, ‘man I screwed this one up’, that’s the end of it. But if you start shufflin’ around, and you start getting squirmy, you’re gonna have problems with him.”

Is it any surprise that Sonnen’s answer was fair and balanced?

After the jump: The latest episode of MMA Inside the Cage (“#91: Atlanta Aftermath”), which includes recaps and exclusive interviews from last weekend’s UFC and Bellator shows, a batch of ugly knockouts, and a wild scrap from EFC Africa.

(He only points at the ones he loves. / Photo via Sherdog)

According to an Oglobo report (translated by FightersOnly), a 75-minute backstage argument between Dana White and Anderson Silva is what led to the hour-long delay of Tuesday’s “Silva vs. Sonnen” press conference in Rio. The short version: Silva initially refused to fight anywhere other than Brazil, owing to his desire to beat Chael Sonnen‘s ass in front of his countrymen. Eventually, dollars spoke louder than words. Now here’s the long version:

Anderson Silva didn’t lash out publicly at Dana White when the UFC president declared he wanted to move the rematch with Chael Sonnen to Las Vegas, USA — but on the quiet he was very upset. It took the UFC president 75 minutes to convince him to fight Chael Sonnen in Las Vegas instead of Rio de Janeiro and this was the reason for the press conference delay yesterday, reports Gustavo Noblat of OGlobo.com.

The talk was heated — initially Anderson refused to change the venue of what could be the rematch of the century…The upcoming confrontation was set to occur at Stadium Engenhao in Rio, and would have been the biggest show of UFC history with 80 thousand tickets to be sold. But the date coincided with international events in the city and White alleged Rio would not have the infrastructure to hold the fighting event.

The champion was frustrated and insisted on fighting in Brazil. Anderson told Dana that Sonnen had been disrespectful with him, his family and all the Brazilian. “He deserves to taught a lesson here, I owe this to my people”, repeated Silva. But Dana was adamant. “If there is no way to make the event in a stadium, it has to be in Las Vegas,” said the company president.

(Click for full-size version.)

“Two grudges will end” at UFC 148, you guys. After the main event, Chael Sonnen is going to pull Anderson Silva aside and personally apologize for that wife-groping steak-cooking stuff, in addition to his general lambasting of the Brazilian people, and Silva will be like, “I understand about the trash-talk, baby bubba, but we’re still friends.” And then Urijah Faber will catch up to Dominick Cruz backstage and explain that when Cruz signed his name over Faber’s face on a poster five years ago, it didn’t really bother him, because really, who would actually hold a grudge over something like that, you know? And then they’ll hug. And hug. And keep hugging. These are things that will happen.

By Elias Cepeda

(The Silva/Sonnen staredown nuzzledown from today’s press-conference, via MMAMania.)

The good news? Anderson Silva and Chael Sonnen will indeed rematch one another this summer. The bad news, at least for Brazilian fans, is that the mega bout will not take place in Brazil as originally planned, but rather in Las Vegas.

UFC President Dana White convened a press conference in Rio this morning, breaking the news alongside middleweight champion Silva and #1 contender Sonnen. White said he wanted to secure a soccer stadium in either Sao Paulo or Rio de Janiero for UFC 147, with Silva vs. Sonnen headlining, but that “everything that could go wrong, went wrong.” That included a United Nations conference being scheduled in Rio during the weekend UFC 147 was originally scheduled for, creating an insurmountable logistical nightmare for the promotion.

Silva vs. Sonnen II will now be moved to UFC 148 on July 7th at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Vegas. UFC 147 will still take place in Brazil, though White said a venue has yet to be secured. The event is scheduled to feature the rematch between Vitor Belfort and Wanderlei Silva, as well as the middleweight and featherweight finals of TUF Brazil. White said that the UFC is also working on moving Jose Aldo to that card from his UFC 149 engagement, against an opponent to be named later.

(Photo via ESPN)

Update: The press conference has been delayed an hour, and is now scheduled to start at 11 a.m. ET / 8 a.m. PT.

With the venue for UFC 147 in jeopardy because of some United Nations bullcrap, UFC president Dana White, middleweight champion Anderson Silva, and champion-in-his-own-mind Chael Sonnen will be hosting a press conference in Rio de Janeiro this morning to announce where and when Silva vs. Sonnen 2 will be taking place. Rumor has it the fight will be bumped to UFC 148, July 7th in Las Vegas, but you’ll just have to watch and see. The presser starts at 10 a.m. ET / 7 a.m. PT; check it out after the jump, courtesy of YouTube.com/UFC, and come back to CagePotato later for our recap of the important points.

DISCLAIMER: This feature is purely a satirical piece- you know, like the title explicitly states. Any references to real people and events are purely for comedic effect. Nothing you are about to read is actual news, and no quotes used in this article are authentic quotes. In short, don’t take anything you are about to read as a real news story.

Pictured: How drug abusing MMA fighters would look if they had some dignity.

The general public has been outraged over Chael Sonnen’s recent comments defending Alistair Overeem, and do not seem to be willing to forgive and forget any time soon. Sonnen defended Overeem on the basis that Overeem simply had an elevated testosterone-to-epitestosterone ratio, and did not test positive for an illegal substance. However, many still believe that Overeem’s elevated T:E ratio was caused by testosterone usage. If true (and it certainly looks true), it gives him an unfair advantage at his job, and therefore is completely unacceptable.

“This is an outrage!” cried Sean Franchetti, a journalist for the popular MMA news outlet Cage Crapato, while snorting his third Adderall of the week. “SorryaboutthatIhave…I have four feature articles due by tomorrow morning, and there’s no way I can do all that without snorting a few lines first.”

By Elias Cepeda

(Jon Jones successfully defended his UFC belt against Rashad Evans Saturday night)

For my money, Saturday night’s UFC 145 main event between Jon Jones and Rashad Evans was exactly what I’d want from a high-level grudge match. A quick stoppage could have led of talk of “luck,” or controversy and perhaps an immediate rematch.

Instead, the former training partners got to see each other from many different angles over the course of five long rounds. In so doing, each man passed tests they had yet to before, each got their licks in and we still had a clear winner.

In only his second career loss, Rashad Evans proved that he could get seriously hurt in a fight and keep going. The young champion Jones showed us much as well in going to a decision.

We know that Jones has the conditioning to go the distance. Perhaps more important than that, we now know that Jones, who recently steamrolled Lyoto Machida, Mauricio Rua and Quinton Jackson, won’t necessarily get frustrated when an opponent doesn’t quickly crumble under his onslaught.

Jones stayed patient, measured and effective throughout the fight with Evans, even when the challenger refused to quit after getting rocked. Jones also has a chin on him.

It would have been easy to miss because of how little he reacted to them, but Jones took some heavy single shots from Evans, right to the chin, temple and neck. And he didn’t even flinch.

(Excellent use of Le Tigre, Mr. Silva.) 

Whether you’re referring to his antics in or out of the cage, to describe UFC middleweight champion Anderson Silva as anything less than an enigma would be a massive understatement. Aside from his appearances in some of the most bizarrely entertaining commercials this side of Japan, “The Spider” has willingly spent time around Sensei Seagal, a man so off-the-wall insane that he will literally threaten you with a lawsuit if you attempt to poke fun at his massive ego. 

*looks over shoulder*

Apparently not satisfied with the amount of verbal attacks being lobbed at him by Chael Sonnen recently, Silva sat down with Brazilian news outlet Globo magazine, who referred to an interview the champ did with Istoe Gente in which he described himself as both a metrosexual and a user of Victoria’s secret products. Thank Christ, it wasn’t the lingerie.

Check out an excerpt from the interview after the jump. 

(Props: FuelTV)

It shouldn’t come as a surprise that Chael Sonnen feels sympathy for Alistair Overeem, considering his own history with abnormally high testosterone levels. On last night’s installment of his weekly troll segment for UFC Tonight, Sonnen blasted MMA media for implying that the Reem tested positive for anything illegal:

“Congratulations, MMA media. Right when I think your incompetence cannot get to any higher level, the Alistair Overeem story comes out. From you kids on the interwebs, running your little dot-com’s from the couch in your mother’s basement, to you beneficiaries of Mark Cuban’s tax write-off, you’ve gone and screwed up the Alistair Overeem case beyond all belief. Is it repairable? I doubt it. If I’m a member of the media and someone tells me that Alistair Overeem failed a drug test, the very first thing I’m going to say is: ‘Really? What substance did he test positive for?’ You see, those basic questions are where the wheels begin to fall off the bus to this entire story.

By Elias Cepeda

(U.N.’s revenge: Anderson Silva knew he shouldn’t have cozied up to John Bolton so publicly back in the late nineties)

Just over two months away from when it was supposed to happen, the year’s most anticipated MMA bout does not yet have a time and place locked in stone, according to UFC President Dana White. Middleweight champion Anderson Silva and #1 contender Chael Sonnen were supposed to square off in a rematch of their 2010 thriller at UFC 147 in Rio de Janiero on June 23rd but at Saturday’s post UFC in Sweden event press conference White revealed that a conference of the United Nations scheduled in Rio the same week may force the fight promotion to move their event.

“The problem down in Rio right now is they’re having a big United Nations convention down there, so there’s some stuff going on. We’re working through it trying to figure this whole thing out,” White said to the assembled media.

The U.N. conference was announced after the UFC first announced their intentions to hold an event in Rio on June 23rd, and will draw tens of thousands of visitors to the city, in addition to heads of state. White says that he’s essentially being told that Rio ain’t big enough for the both of the UFC and U.N.

(“These voices, these voices, I hear them, and when they talk I follow, I follow, I follow…”)

Nothing like a good caption contest to remind us what a funny bunch of sons-of-bitches y’all are. After sifting through nearly 200 submissions, we’ve selected the two winners who will be receiving copies of Chael Sonnen‘s new life-manual, The Voice of Reason: A V.I.P. Pass to Enlightenment a month before it goes on sale to the general public. But first, some runners-up…

LOKI: Chael struggled to hold back the guilt in his face; he never realized that wishing cancer on Ed Soares would actually work.

tdpwent: Chael and random guy #2 show what a certain brazilian BJJ expert will be doing every night after his failed pick-up attempt.

mcw89138: Chael and Ronda drove 2,000 miles to an undisclosed Starbucks to see for themselves the Internet freak and phenomenon known as “perfect circle head” guy.

BigBalluh: The new season of Two and a Half Men is gonna suck.

Kid Clam Curtains: Not pictured: The knee-high rubber boots they’re wearing for all the bullshit.

Last month, we warned you that Chael Sonnen will soon be dominating your local bookstore, having already conquered the worlds of professional fighting, politics, and athletic commission hearings. His new book is called The Voice of Reason: A V.I.P. Pass to Enlightenment, and will be available to the general public on May 15th. Amazon.com describes the content in these humble terms:

Sonnen’s commentary and tales of heroic adventure will initiate you into the world of superhuman greatness. Allow him to carry you like a frail damsel through the world of professional mixed martial arts as he cuts weight, deals with moronic cornermen, expresses his disdain for focus mitts and punching in general, gets his face rearranged, and finds support and encouragement from fans. Permit him to cleanse your mind’s palate and teach you the truth about history, politics, endangered species, cinema, terrorists, music, particle accelerators, and his plans for creating a Chaelocracy, which translates as “a Better Earth.” Shower him with praise as he takes you into his manly mitts like a lump of clay and reshapes you in his own likeness. 

Like all men of myth and legend, Sonnen strives for the betterment of the human race. Prometheus brought us fire; Dana White brought us the modern-day gladiator; and Chael P. Sonnen now brings us the step-by-step guide to being a great human being and patriot…There is no better day to stop being you and start trying to be Chael P. Sonnen.

So…who wants to get a copy a month before it comes out?

(Could I get JUST ONE of those exemptions, por favor?) 

Some big news out of California today, as it appears that the California State Athletic Commission has taken a huge step towards legalizing the therapeutic use of testosterone and marijuana in mixed martial arts competition. SI.com was the first to break the news:

The California State Athletic Commission voted on Monday to approve an amendment that allows therapeutic use exemptions (TUE) for combat sports’ athletes who use drugs currently banned by the state agency for medical purposes, including testosterone and marijuana.

To be adopted into state law, the amendment’s verbiage must now be reviewed and approved by the Department of Consumer Affairs and then the state’s Office of Administrative Law, a process that could take months or even years, if it passes at all.

OK, so it’s not as big of news as one could have hoped, but it’s something, right? Then again, depending on your stance on testosterone replacement therapy (or marijuana for that matter), this could be a step in the wrong direction for the sport of MMA.

(Pictured from left to right: Jason Miller’s mother, Chael Sonnen, and Jason Miller’s girlfriend.) 

There is no truly no place on the Internet more hate stricken than that of the Twittersphere, other than Sputnikmusic or well…here, of course. I’ll be honest, I’ve had a Twitter account for a few months now and I’m still not truly sure as to what its purpose on this world is. Do I care if Kourtney Kardashian is currently releasing the contents of her latest trip to Moe’s in the second floor bathroom of a Versace outlet? Not really, but apparently there are nearly six million people on this planet that need to be made aware of this disturbing fact, right down to how many pieces of corn managed to find their way into the bowl. But I digress.

Perhaps the most ironic aspect of Twitter, at least in my mind, is its ability to make celebrities willingly trade away the last bit of privacy they so desperately ask for when bombarded by the media. In less than 150 characters, these public figures can run their names into the ground, yet even the UFC encourages it, handing out monetary awards for “creativity” and “growth percentage” for this “social” media network. Where, in times past, people wrote down their thoughts in journals, diaries, or simply let a thought go, nowadays everyone from Miguel Torres to King Mo have significantly screwed themselves by using this device as a platform to express their innermost feelings for the world to see, somehow unaware that it would bite them in the ass almost immediately. Such is the case for Jason “Mayhem” Miller.

Always the funnyman, Miller took to his Twitter yesterday and jotted down quite a zinger in light of Chael Sonnen’s recent Twitter remarks concerning Alistair Overeem:

@mayhemmiller
Chael berating someone on their test level is like me making fun of someone’s bad haircut.

Check out Sonnen’s end all response after the jump. 

By Elias Cepeda

(Come on NSAC, can’t we talk this out?)

Alistair Overeem may have failed his recent surprise drug test, but it appears that he isn’t giving up on challenging heavyweight champion Junior Dos Santos at UFC 146 on May 26th. He has requested a hearing with the Nevada State Athletic Commission (NSAC) and has been given a hearing date of April 24th, little more than a month before he hopes to still vie for the UFC belt.

After testing positive for elevated testosterone levels in late March in Nevada, Overeem had the option of asking the state’s athletic commission to test the second sample they took from him during their test, as well as the option of deciding to apply for a license in the state at a hearing.

More on Overeem’s options and the UFC’s plans after the jump.

(Props: youtube.com/fueltv)

Chael Sonnen is back with more surreal statements in his latest Chael’s Corner segment for Fuel’s UFC Tonight. Here a sampling of Sonnen’s sincere and deep thoughts:

“Fighters have recently seen it as their quasi-job to continually put out misinformation.”

Recently? Naw that’s nothing new, Chael. Fighters have never had a problem, say, screaming in pain and tapping out to a submission, and then claiming that they did not. Heck, some guys have even gone on pr campaigns questioning the professionalism of refs who save fighters who ask for fights to be stopped. Maybe it doesn’t count as misinformation if the obvious truth is caught on live national television.

“[Some fighters] just refuse to answer a question, head on.”

True. Like, for example, answering questions with non-sequitor quotes ripped off from western movies and pro wrestling promos.

“There’s a tremendous difference between what fighters say vs. what fighters mean.”

(What has two thumbs, false teeth and a guaranteed title shot? This guy!)

After months of contradictory and unclear statements from Dan Henderson and UFC President Dana White, fans are now being told with certainty that Hendo’s next fight will be for a belt. Being the stone-cold pimp that he is, Henderson can fight in multiple divisions, and his next fight will take place at either middleweight or light-heavyweight. In a new interview with Heavy.com’s Megan Olivi, White had the following to say regarding the future of the winner of da greatest MMA fight ever:

“Dan Henderson will get the winner of that fight or the winner of the Anderson Silva [vs. Chael Sonnen] fight. Dan Henderson just wants a title shot. There’s been a lot of talk about the stuff that I said. Here’s the thing: I offered Dan Henderson two fights. Dan Henderson wants this fight. Normally I don’t do that. Guys don’t sit around and pick their fights. There’s been very specific cases where that’s happened and it’s guys who have earned it or deserve it, and Dan Henderson is one of those guys. Listen, if Dan Henderson, Henderson has been around forever. He’s forty-something years old, he’s been knocking guys out left and right. If he wants to sit around and wait for this title shot, he can do it.”

(Chael Sonnen posing with his favorite fake belt in front of his favorite fake backdrop.)

The UFC announced this week that middleweight champion Anderson Silva‘s highly anticipated rematch with #1 contender/doper/inspirational author/felon/snitch Chael Sonnen is to take place June 23rd in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. But when our friends at MMA Fighting asked Mr. Sonnen for comment on the announcement, he claimed to have not signed a bout agreement.

“My demand has not been met…I’ve signed nothing,” he told them.

It seems likely that while his actual signing is a formality at this point, the media-savvy Sonnen is trying to add some drama and comedy to the situation. Through his twitter account, Sonnen reiterated that he had one demand that needed to be met before he signed on to fight Silva, and that he would only “declare” it to television talk show host Jim Rome.

(You best believe that if Anderson’s wife isn’t making someone a sandwich, she’s doing their laundry.) 

Keeping with the theme of previous UFC on Fox promos, the latest ad features none other than UFC middleweight champion Anderson Silva trying to convince us that he’s just a normal guy whilst performing tasks that only The Fonz could get away with. No, he isn’t lip singing Minnie Riperton or seducing Brazilian pop stars, but “The Spider” manages to be entertaining nonetheless.

But your probably asking yourself, how could someone who all but refuses to speak English appear in an American television commercial? Surely they didn’t subtitle him, because our forefathers didn’t die face down in the mud so that we’d be forced to listen to some cockamamie, Godless language in our own homes and read on top of it. But it turns out that there would be no need for subtitles, because wouldn’t you know, Chael Sonnen wasn’t lying to us; Anderson Silva speaks better English than Jackie Chan has managed to learn in twenty-some years of acting.

This more or less confirms that Big Nog did in fact try to feed a bus a carrot. It’s only a matter of time until the truth is revealed.

Join us after the jump for the video. 

(Fans outside the Engenhão await their national hero.)

The UFC has confirmed the date and venue for UFC 147: Silva vs. Sonnen 2, slating it for June 23rd at Estádio Olímpico João Havelange in Rio de Janeiro. Known to the locals as “Engenhão,” the multi-use stadium seats nearly 47,000 people, and is the home field for the Botafogo soccer team. Engenhão will host the athletics competitions at the 2016 Summer Olympics.

With the main-event building steam, Chael Sonnen has gotten a head-start on his trash talk, responding to Anderson Silva‘s recent claim that Chael should quit talking and start training. His latest promo clip is vintage Sonnen. Here’s a taste:

“I’m not fighting you in Brazil, I’m not fighting you in Chicago, I’m not fighting you in Florida. I’m fighting you in the Octagon. And when you get in there and I get in there, I’m gonna stomp you this time the same as I did last time. You can complain about your rib. I’m sure your rib *did* hurt. Your rib is inside of a coward. That’s the problem your rib’s got. It’s got the same problem your hands and feet have — they’re attached to *you*, dummy! I’m gonna be attached to you too, for 25 minutes or until you give up.”

Check out the video after the jump..

(Thankfully, Silva’s wife was too busy making steak sandwiches for a certain someone, and could not be in attendance.) 

HOW CAN CHAEL SONNEN HATE THIS COUNTRY?!

If I knew that this was how fighters undergoing injury rehabilitation were treated in Brazil, I would have thrown myself in front of that horse truck that ran over Antonio Rodrigo Nogueria years ago. We have no clue what the name of this show is (Melhor do Brasil maybe?), but we feel that depriving you of that piece of information won’t really irk you when you take a look at the drop dead gorgeous women that the current UFC middleweight champion Anderson Silva got to judge as part of a body painting contest.

Join us after the jump for the video. You’ll be glad you did.

(Full press conference video, via YouTube.com/UFC. Man, Nick Ring is like a *god* in that town.)

Today’s UFC press conference in Calgary resulted in a tidal wave of major announcements, highlighted by two title-fight bookings and confirmations of three Canadian events in 2012. Here’s what we’re looking at…

- The middleweight championship rematch between Anderson Silva and Chael Sonnen will take place at an 80,000-seat soccer stadium in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil, not Sao Paulo as originally reported. [Ed. note: R.I.P., Chael.] The exact venue hasn’t been confirmed yet, and the event is expected to take place at UFC 147 on either June 16th or June 23rd. It will be the third time in 10 months that Rio will host a UFC event. We’ll be keeping our eyes out for this guy.

- For the third year in a row, the UFC will hold three events in Canada this year: UFC 149 in Calgary (7/21), UFC 152 in Toronto (9/22), and UFC 154 in Montreal (11/17). No matchups have been scheduled for the Toronto and Montreal shows, although welterweight champ Georges St. Pierre said he’d like to compete at UFC 154 if his knee-surgery recovery allows it.