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21 Humans Who Make Being Human Look Really, Really Hard

Tag: chicks

Not That It Matters, But Jon Jones Had Two Chicks In His Car When He Crashed His Bentley Into a Pole


(Sorry bro, that title doesn’t give you diplomatic immunity. / Photo via Cagewriter)

In a follow-up report about Jon Jones’s DUI arrest, WBNG Action News confirms that the UFC light-heavyweight champ had two women in his 2012 Bentley Continental GT when he had a run-in with a telephone pole in Binghamton, NY, on May 19th. Both were injured, and neither of them was his fiancée:

Cara Johnson, 25, was in the front passenger seat and Michele Vojtisek, 25, was sitting in the back passenger seat. When Jones crashed, air bags deployed. Vojtisek suffered bruising and cuts on the right side of her face, one above her eye and one below. Johnson got a nosebleed and complained of shoulder pain. She also had bruising from a seat belt. Both women were treated at Wilson Hospital.

Officers say Jones speech was slurred, he was unsteady on his feet, and it was evident he was intoxicated. Jones refused a field sobriety test and a breathalyzer. He pled guilty to DWI Tuesday in Binghamton City Court as part of a plea deal and will be back in court for sentencing on June 19.

MMA Mania gives us the head up that Cara Johnson was a former college basketball player who went to high-school with Jones; we’re not sure who this Vojsitek broad is. And in a related story on SI, Loretta Hunt lays out the complete history of Jones’s spotty relationship with driving:

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Videos: Hot Chicks Teach MMA Submissions


Sexy Girls Teach MMA Submissions – Watch more Funny Videos

Bodog Fight may have been a cracker-jack operation run by (alleged) criminals, but their ring girls were freakin’ amazing. We just stumbled across their old series of MMA instructional clips, in which the Bodog Girls acted as lovely assistants to professional fighters. First up is Matt Thorpe, who teaches the chest-to-chest sweep. ("Nice job, ladies," indeed.) Check out the rest of the series below, where Kultar "Black Mamba" Gill takes us through the very sensual north-south triangle, Daniel Puder demonstrates an armbar from guard, and Chael Sonnen submits a model via rear-naked choke.

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Hits & Chicks: Attacking That Last Shred of Dignity


Hits – Watch more free videos

This, believe it or not, is an actual ad for Elite XC and Showtime boxing put together by the clever jerks over at Showtime Sports. I like to think that the moment the song “Hits & Chicks” was written, somewhere Glenn Danzig suddenly felt like killing himself, even more than usual, and he didn’t know why. I also like to think that after the song was set to this video montage of both hits and chicks, one of the advertising executives at Showtime watched it and said, “I don’t know, you think it’s too subtle?”

That’s when they added the phrase “Jugs and Pugs.” Just because they wanted to make sure that they were reaching the all-important ‘morons aged 14-54′ demographic. And here we were thinking that Elite XC wasn’t doing enough to promote this event.

Is it too much to hope that “Busted Ears, Bodacious Boobs” will become Elite XC’s new tagline?

(Props: Bloody Elbow)

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Because It’s Friday: Bikini Cat-Fight

What better way to get psyched for the weekend: This is the wildest fight by a group of hot girls (okay, a group of hot girls and one brutal fat chick) that I’ve ever seen. Enjoy, and ask yourself — why is it that whenever girls fight they immediately turn into Lil’ Showstoppa?

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Happy Valentines Day!


(“Don’t let me interrupt, Ladies. I’m just a simple fly on the wall.”)

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New ‘Edith Labelle’ Shoot on UFC.com; New ‘MMA Girl’ Joins Joanne

Edith
(Her best angle.)

The UFC’s relationship with upstart Octagon Girl “Edith Labelle” — a.k.a. Edith Larente, a.k.a. Anabelle — has been made official with a new photo-shoot on UFC.com. Check it out, if you’re into that sort of thing.

In other chick-news, MMA Girl Joanne has found a new companion to roll with. A series of videos posted to YouTube yesterday shows her and “Jenny” demonstrating some half-guard techniques. The first part is below, parts two and three are after the jump.

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