(Stupid Things MMA Fans Used to Believe #26: THIS will be a competitive match up.)

Although he’s getting more press for his TRT usage than he is for his actual octagon performances nowadays, there was a time when Vitor Belfort was just a fresh-faced Brazilian assassin who was quite literally trimming the fat from the UFC’s heavyweight division. That time was 1997, and there was perhaps no greater a display of Vitor’s ability to crush hopelessly outmatched and overweight opponents than his UFC 12 thrashing of Scott Ferrozzo. Thankfully, UFC.com has made the fight temporarily available to the public, presumably so we can gain some perspective on what a true squash match looks like and be happy with the fights we’re given.

As hilarious as it is depressing, join us after the jump as we take a look back at just what constituted a UFC tournament final. You will laugh, you will cry, you will declare that you’re getting too old for this shit.

(When Marcus Davis says he’s going to be Sloth for Halloween, Marcus Davis IS Sloth for Halloween.) 

Before Nate Diaz decided to put the Funyuns aside and start making a serious run at the 155 lb title, he floated between the welterweight and lightweight divisions for the majority of his UFC career with mixed results. However, his greatest performance at 170 came at UFC 118, where Diaz faced off against Irish-American powerhouse Marcus Davis. Known for his Angel of Death right hand, Davis was fresh off a TKO victory over the UFC’s favorite narcoleptic French Canadian, Jonathan Goulet, at UFC 114, and planned to do the same with Nate. But as Rory Markham and Melvin Guillard should have informed him, one-punch knockout power stands no chance against the iron chin and hailstorm of pitter-patter punches that constitute a Diaz beating.

The fight was classic Diaz — taunting within the first 30 seconds of the fight, getting rocked yet continuing to taunt upon recovery, breaking their opponents will until they finally give up — and received Fight of the Night honors when all was said and done. While we can assume that Nate blew the extra cash on beluga caviar and front row tickets to A Midsummer Night’s Dream, Davis undoubtedly spent his hiring Thedus’ finest doctor to remove the baby alien that Diaz had somehow implanted in his right eyeball.

Video after the jump.