(Must…resist…shit…getting…too…real…)

As a big fan of TUF 12′s Cody McKenzie, I’ve come to realize that it’s hard to fault the guy for his nonsensical and often self-destructive decisions, especially when it comes to choosing his opponents. The man reaches for the stars, dammit, and will simply not be told that he doesn’t have the right to call out Frankie Edgar, or Jose Aldo, or Chad Mendes, despite the fact that just managed to bring his win-loss ratio in the UFC to the .500 mark.

No, “The AK Kid” wasn’t one to overthink, or even realize the fact that he had dropped 3 out of his last 4 fights heading into his do-or-die bout with Leonard Garcia at UFC 159, which is why it makes total sense that he, now a featherweight, is calling out top lightweight contender Josh Thomson, like he didn’t just save his UFC career by beating a guy on a four-fight losing streak. How can you not love this kid?

(Photo courtesy of Getty Images)

If there’s anything positive for Alan Belcher to take away from his loss to Michael Bisping in the co-main event of last night’s UFC 159, it’s that he was right about Bisping being unable to knock him out. Bisping had plenty of opportunities to do so throughout the fight, yet Belcher was too resilient of an opponent. Unfortunately, that’s right about where the positive notes end. Bisping not only outstruck Belcher by a considerable margin throughout their fight, but also avoided all of Belcher’s takedowns. Simply put, Belcher didn’t have any answers for Bisping’s jab-n-jog offense.

And then there was the eye poke that ended up stopping the fight, awarding Michael Bisping the technical decision victory. It was a disappointing way to end an otherwise decent scrap – especially considering Belcher’s previous troubles with that eye. Fortunately, Belcher has since tweeted that he is doing okay.

Perhaps the strangest thing about the eye poke is that this fight wasn’t the only bout on the card to end in technical decision due to an eye poke. Earlier in the evening, the light heavyweight bout between Ovince St. Preux and Gian Villante also ended when St. Preux inadvertently poked Villante in the eye. St. Preaux walked away with a technical majority decision victory. Kind of makes a case for changing the design of MMA gloves.

Elsewhere on the card…

(“How ’bout we say ‘triangle choke, round 2.’ I’ve got a t-shirt riding on this.” / Photo via MMAFighting.com)

With UFC 159 slated for tomorrow night, CagePotato founding editor Ben Goldstein and beloved CP staff writer Jared Jones have teamed up to argue about all the important themes surrounding the event. So how will the absurd light-heavyweight title fight end, exactly? What will happen if Alan Belcher actually lets Michael Bisping take a free shot to his face? Can the third women’s UFC fight possibly live up to the first two? How many more fights can Leonard Garcia lose before the UFC gives him the ol’ heave-ho? Read on, and throw down your own opinions in the comments section.

Will Jon Jones immediately demolish Chael Sonnen, or will he play around with Chael a little before demolishing him? And will Chael retire after the loss?

BG: I rarely make sweeping statements about who will win an MMA fight because 1) anything can happen in this crazy sport, and 2) the things you write on the Internet often come back to haunt you. But yes, Jon Jones will win this fight. I absolutely guarantee it. Sonnen’s best weapon — his relentless wrestling attack — will dash apart against Jones’s own wrestling, which is precision-tuned for the sport of MMA. Quickly out of options, Chael will throw his patented “I give up” spinning backfist, fall down against the cage, and will whisper a quick prayer to his God before Jones literally eats him and shits him out. And I do mean literally, okay? Literally.

I’m leaning towards a quick beat-down in this fight rather than an extended clowning, because Jones takes his job too seriously to “play around” with an opponent. (He’s not exactly Mr. Fun, we’ve noticed.) And once Chael feels the power of a large light-heavyweight, he’ll realize what a bad idea this whole thing was in the first place. To exit the sport directly after another humiliation wouldn’t fit in with Sonnen’s blustery self-image, so I think he’ll take at least one more fight — maybe at middleweight, maybe at light-heavyweight — before calling it quits. Once he starts losing to non-champions, he’ll wisely make the switch to full-time UFC talking head and occasional hair-texture tester.

JJ: Mark my words, this fight will be Jon Jones’s UFC 97 (or UFC 112, depending on which fight you thought was worse). Jones may not be a fun-loving guy, as you stated, but it also appears that the tryptophan-induced honeymoon between these two TUF coaches has passed, leaving behind only apathy in its wake. If you’ve noticed in the past, the foes “Bones knows” on a personal level seem to last the longest in the cage with him (Rampage, Rashad) — perhaps out of respect, perhaps because they are both tough as hell — so I think we should start preparing ourselves for a tepid, five-round affair highlighted by Bones’s jab and Sonnen’s desperate attempts to convert a single leg.

And when all is said and done, Sonnen will snatch the mic out of Joe Rogan’s hand, and in an attempt to mimic [enter professional wrestler name here]’s infamous retirement speech, will announce that, and I quote:

(“No, Leonard, I don’t know how they make Dippin’ Dots either.”)

When Leonard Garcia and Cody McKenzie were originally booked to face each other back at UFC 155, we categorized the pairing as a “loser leaves town” match. What fools we were; although McKenzie was forced out of the fight with an injury, his replacement opponent in Max Holloway was responsible for Garcia’s fourth straight loss in the UFC*. And while a whole bunch of guys got the axe shortly thereafter, Leonard Garcia was somewhat surprisingly not one of them.

We double-checked the list of fired fighters, then we triple checked it. We even created a flowchart to try and make sense of things, but it appears that as long as Garcia continues to treat strategy like Lloyd Irvin treats consent, he will always have a place in the UFC. It’s a luxury that his upcoming opponent, TUF 12 alum Cody McKenzie, cannot afford.

McKenzie and Garcia have in fact been rebooked for UFC 159 in what has to be a do-or-die fight for at least McKenzie, who has dropped three of his past four UFC contests including a 40 second KO via body punch loss to Chad Mendes in his last outing. Again, according to our chart, McKenzie’s current place on the “100 heavy” UFC roster makes about as much sense as Garcia’s, so expect these two to put on a show come April 27th. One of their UFC careers could depend on it.

So who takes this one, Potato Nation, the one-trick pony or the one-track mind?

The full lineup for UFC 159 is after the jump. 

(“Aw thanks bro, these chips are so clutch. Say, you’re not an undercover cop, are you?”/ Props: CombatLifestyle)

Already smacked down by injuries to Forrest Griffin, Chris Weidman, and Gray Maynard, December 29th’s once-epic UFC 155: Dos Santos vs. Velasquez 2 card just got hit with another pair of withdrawals, less than two weeks before showtime.

First up: Cody McKenzie, the affable guillotine-choker who got gut-shot KO’d by Chad Mendes in his last appearance in July, has pulled out of his preliminary card bout with Leonard Garcia due to an undisclosed training injury. The UFC is currently searching for a replacement opponent for Garcia, who is looking to rescue his career after losing his last three matches. We’ll update you if/when Bad Boy gets a new booking. Update: Garcia will be fighting Max Holloway, who has won his last two fights against Pat Schilling and Justin Lawrence.

Speaking of undisclosed injuries, Czech wrestler Karlos Vemola is out of his main card match against Chris Leben, and will be replaced by Strikeforce vet Derek Brunson. After winning his first nine pro fights, Brunson has dropped his last two, a knockout loss to Ronaldo Souza and a decision loss to Kendall Grove. Leben vs. Brunson will remain on the UFC 155 main card, and will mark Leben’s first UFC appearance since his TKO loss to Mark Munoz in November 2011, and subsequent one-year suspension for oxycodone and oxymorphone. The Crippler is currently taking it one day at a time.

UFC 155′s bruised lineup is after the jump. Check it out, and ponder what could have been…

Clearly, there are zero inappropriate jokes to be made here.

In the territorial days of professional wrestling, the loser leaves town match was a way for wrestling promoters to wrap up a storyline when one of the wrestlers left his company for a rival promotion. Even though MMA is much different from professional wrestling, our sport still books these fights every so often. It isn’t exactly uncommon for the UFC to book fights between two not-quite-contenders, where the losers receive a pink slip and a call from Ray or Bjorn.

Case in point: The UFC announced yesterday that featherweights Leonard Garcia and Cody McKenzie will meet up at UFC 155. With both men being a combined 3-7 in their last ten fights (2-8 if you aren’t blind, deaf and dumb), and both coming off of less-than-impressive losses, the loser of this fight will almost certainly be spending time outside of the UFC.

On paper, Leonard Garcia is heading into this bout in worse condition than his opponent. Garcia has only won once in his last five fights, and that victory was a total bullshit decision over Nam Phan. The only thing that may save Garcia is the fact that he’s usually entertaining in defeat – his Zuffa career includes a total of five Fight of the Night awards, one Knockout of the Night and 2010′s Fight of the Year, a total bullshit victory over The Korean Zombie at WEC 48. Oh, and if you haven’t noticed, judges have an inexplicable love for the guy.

(Seriously? Not even *one* vote for Jason Guida?)

The 16th season of The Ultimate Fighter kicks off tonight on FX, and while we wouldn’t exactly say we’re looking forward to it, the premiere of a new season always puts us in a reflective mood. In this week’s installment of the CagePotato Roundtable, we’ll be paying tribute to our favorite cast-members in TUF history, and joining us today is a very, very special guest — Luke O’Brien, an award-winning journalist whose work has appeared in Rolling Stone, The New York Times, The Atlantic, Fortune, and many other outlets that are much more respectable than the one you’re reading right now. (I first discovered Luke through his excellent MMA reporting for Deadspin.)

Shoot us your own favorite TUF guys in the comments section, and if you have a topic for a future Roundtable column, e-mail us at tips@cagepotato.com

Luke O’Brien

Has there been a more unlikely TUF champion than Amir Sadollah? In 2008, the Persian-Irish surgical technologist came out of nowhere — or in his case, Richmond — to win the seventh season of the show by beating All-American wrestler C.B. Dollaway. Sadollah armbarred Dollaway not once, but twice. Before that, he triangled Matt Brown, who oozed tough. And before that, he TKOd Gerald Harris, who certainly looked tough. At the time, Sadollah had never had a pro fight. Not one. I liked him immediately. Not because he was an upstart, a little doughy around the middle and a bit of a lumberer. There were purer reasons that drew me to a fighter who walks out to Iranian techno music.

For one, he had a mullet. This wasn’t the unaware bumpkin coiffure found in many stretches of this country. Rather, it was a curated flange of keratin that complemented the smirk often playing on Sadollah’s face. It was a mullet that, like its owner, didn’t take itself too seriously. A mullet that grasped irony. And irony has always been in short supply on TUF. The premise of the show — quarantine 16 fighters for a month in a house stocked with unlimited amounts of booze and see what happens — is absurd, although I guess you could say the same about all reality television. As much as I enjoy TUF, the only way I can fully appreciate it is at a sardonic remove. Sadollah allowed me to do that.

Props: MMAfanmade.tumblr.com

Let’s get one thing straight: Last night’s co-main event was by no means a legacy-cementing fight. The legacies of both fighters had been cemented well before last night, with both Forrest Griffin and Tito Ortiz being very influential in the UFC’s push towards the mainstream, being involved in unforgettable fights and holding the light-heavyweight championship. While winning the trilogy would be a nice way to cap off an otherwise lackluster rivalry, it would be nothing more than another “W” in the grand scheme of things. Especially for Tito – while Forrest is arguably worthy of a Hall of Fame induction, Tito already has been inducted.

Which perhaps explained why Tito Ortiz seemed more aggressive throughout the fight: Forrest had little to lose, Tito had nothing to lose. While the aggression of “The People’s Champion” seemed to have Forrest Griffin on the verge of defeat a few times during the fight, in the end it wasn’t enough. For the majority of the fight, Griffin managed to outstrike Ortiz en route to the unanimous decision victory.

Really, there is little more to be said for the actual fight. Two aging veterans entered the cage and performed like aging veterans. Both men looked slow, both men gassed out early, and if it weren’t for the names involved, this fight would have had zero chance of taking home the $75k Fight of the Night honors. If you want to watch the fight again, watch the fight again - if you missed it, you didn’t miss much.

(Props: MMAInsidetheCageTV)

If you met Cody McKenzie in public without knowing who is, you’d probably assume he was just another stoned-out candle-hobbyist. It’s rare to see such a wide gap between a person’s chill-dude vibe and how dangerous they are in a cage-fight scenario. After picking up another win last Tuesday at UFC on FUEL 3, McKenzie gave an interview to MMA Inside the Cage‘s Casey Oxendine, where he ran down his McKenzietine victory against newcomer Marcus Levasseur, and argued for Nick Diaz as a legitimate third-party presidential candidate. To which we’d say: Come on, bro. Ron Paul got steam-rolled, and he actually showed up to his appearances.

After the jump: Casey and Cyrus present the latest episode of MMA Inside the Cage, featuring Ronda Rousey discussing her infamous Facebook-nuking of that dumb bastard, on-the-scene coverage from the World Jiu-Jitsu Expo, Tom Lawlor running down his disturbing lack of personal hygiene, and the usual batch of nasty regional MMA knockouts.

(You have no idea how right you are.) 

What in the name of Science is this bullshit? Fresh off a victory over Marcus LeVesseur at UFC on FUEL 3, it has been announced that the inventor of the deadliest guillotine choke known to man, TUF 12 veteran Cody McKenzie, will be making his featherweight debut at UFC 148, which transpires from the MGM Grand Garden Casino in Las Vegas on July 7th. Welcoming him to 145 lbs will be…Chad Mendes? Didn’t he just fight JOSE F’ING ALDO FOR THE F’ING TITLE?! Did McKenzie piss off Dana White, or is this Karma’s way of punishing him for making Josh Koscheck look like even more of a clown on the set of TUF 10? If it’s the latter, then Karma is a dick. A high school Letterman jacket wearing, clove cigarette smoking, man ass motorboating dick.

As we all know, McKenzie has won 11 of his 13 professional victories by way of his signature vice-grip like submission, aptly dubbed “The McKenzietine,” which has earned him a spot amongst the greatest one-trick ponies of all time. Mendes, on the other hand, has never been submitted, and is coming off the first blemish of his career, which came via brutal first round knockout to Aldo. Why it was decided that these two should face off is nothing short of baffling.

(Tom Lawlor: The UFC’s undisputed Seven Up champion.) 

Maybe it’s just us, but it seems like it’s getting harder and harder to drum up a potential list of future opponents for the winners of a given UFC card these days. Not only are most fighters already booked for the promotion’s ever-increasing amount of cards, but the ones selected for title shots are seemingly being drawn out of a hat. Be that as it may, we are going to try and sift through the wreckage of last night’s UFC on FUEL card and determine who the big winners should face next. Enjoy.

Chan Sung Jung: We’ll be the first to admit that we underestimated “The Korean Zombie” heading into yesterday’s fight. But aside from his excellent transitions on the ground, or that amazing takedown reversal to mount he was able to pull off, the thing that impressed us the most about Jung was his tranquility. While Poirier was throwing his best shots at him, Jung remained calm, and worked his way out of every hairy situation like a true pro. He deserves a title shot, and Dana White claims that he is next in line for one. And The Baldfather would never go back on his word. Just ask Anthony Pettis.

(No, no, not THAT kind of ultimate fighter.) 

Seven years. Fifteen seasons. The Ultimate Fighter has been a part of our lives for nearly a decade, ladies and gentlemen, and not only is it still going strong, but it has spread at the rate of your average zombie apocalypse. With the first international installment of the hit reality show already under way, TUF has seemingly evolved beyond its counterparts, transcending even that of the sport in it’s ability to excite, and often inspire its audience. Sure, the next season of Jersey Shore will feature a piss drunk pregnant woman and a possible probable cokehead and will therefore rule the ratings from here to eternity, but The Ultimate Fighter has something better to bring to the table than fabricated drama. Mainly, sweet ass knockouts.

Seven years of sweet ass knockouts, to be precise. That’s the entire length of Tommy Callahan’s college career.

With these knockouts, we’ve seen underdogs pull off upsets, loudmouths get their comeuppance, and the emergence of future superstars. So in honor of what has already been a KO-ridden season of TUF, we decided to watch every season back to back, and determine the BEST knockout from its respective season. Enjoy.

(Step 1. Absorb EVERY kick, Step 2. ??????, Step 3. Profit. Props to the brilliant cine-files over at Pajiba for the inspiration behind this article.) 

Mixed martial arts fans are perhaps the most ruthless group of people out there; a quick scroll down any one of our comments sections only confirms this. One minute, a certain fighter is praised as a ruthless, badass hombre cut from the same cloth as the greatest champions the sport has ever known, and the next, they’re being told to save themselves the embarrassment of another performance and just retire already. It’s a crazy sport.

But then there are those few and far between fighters that we choose to rally behind regardless of where they currently stand in the MMA ranking system. Sometimes it’s simply because they can make us laugh, and other times it’s their “go for broke” mentality that wins us over. Sure, they’ve dropped seven of their last eight, including one to a drunken bar patron who accidentally stumbled into the ring, but all of those fights were like totally awesome, bro, so who are we to complain when they are kept around while other, more talented fighters are let go?

Here are eight fighters we will continue to root for, no matter how quickly their performances make us silently wish otherwise.

#8 – Aaron Riley

(Even when Riley *doesn’t* lose a fight, he still loses the fight.) 
Current record: 30-13-1
Record in last five fights: 2-3

Aaron Riley’s nickname could very well be “TUF Fodder,” because the man has fought nothing but The Ultimate Fighter alums, and often winners, for the better part of his UFC career. And it’s a shame, because the dude always brings the fight to these whippersnappers, but simply hasn’t been able to put any of them away. Most recently, he had his jaw broken again by TUF 13 winner Tony Ferguson at UFC 135. Back at UFC 105, he was made into mince meat by TUF 9 winner Ross Pearson. Set to square off against, you guessed it, TUF 12 alum Cody McKenzie, at UFC on FUEL 3 in May, Riley may be looking at his final chance to prove he can hang with these young guns before he is demoted to the Strikeforce roster. Speaking of a certain Alaskan native…

(“It’s called an ‘illusion’, okay? A ‘trick’ is something a whore does for money.”)

Leading up to her Strikeforce title fight against Miesha Tate on Saturday, Ronda Rousey bristled at the suggestion that she was a “one-trick pony” simply because she had finished all four of her professional MMA fights — and her two amateur fights before that — by armbar. Then, Rousey finished Tate by armbar anyway.

But being a one-trick pony shouldn’t be a derogatory term in MMA. If you’re so good at your specialized technique that you can finish top-flight opponents with it, even though they know it’s coming, then you should be applauded, not criticized. So let’s pay tribute to the seven greatest one-trickers in mixed martial arts. If we’ve left out any good ones, please let us know in the comments section.

RONDA ROUSEY
Trick: The armbar
Finishing percentage via that trick: 100% (5 armbar wins in 5 pro fights)
Does she have a nickname based on that trick?: No
How long can Ronda’s perfect armbar streak last? Unlike some of the other names on this list, “Rowdy” has proven that she can land her technique-of-choice against the elite of her division. Rousey faces former Strikeforce 135-pound champion Sarah Kaufman next, and it might be a good sign that Kaufman’s sole career loss — against Marloes Coenen in 2010 — came via armbar.

GIVA SANTANA

Trick: The armbar
Finishing percentage via that trick: 72.2% (13 armbar wins in 18 pro fights)
Does he have a nickname based on that trick?: Yes, “The Arm Collector”
Carrying an overall record of 17-1, Givanildo Santana has torqued elbow-joints all over the world. Santana picked up his 13th armbar win during his Bellator debut in October, and is a dark horse to sweep the promotion’s upcoming middleweight tournament.

And if neither pulled out? My God what a beautiful baby!

The fight cards for UFC 130 and UFC on Versus 4 are undergoing some minor renovations. It was announced yesterday that both Matt Riddle and Cody McKenzie have sustained injuries forcing them from their respective bouts.

(Should make for some interesting match-ups if you’re an MMA fan. Or if you’re a CP commenter, they’ll likely just be fodder for ginger and gay jokes.)

The UFC announced a pair of upcoming bouts Monday between featuring two TUF alumnus and a pair of apt opponents.

The Ultimate Fighter 12 contestant Cody McKenzie (12-1) and IFL and WEC Bart Palaszewski (35-14) will square off UFC 130 May 28 at the MGM Grand Garden Arena in Las Vegas.

After picking up his first win in the Octagon at the TUF 12 finale over Aaron Wilkinson via his patented “Mackenzietine” choke, the 23-year-old Cordova, Alaska native lost the first bout of his 13-fight MMA career one month later to Yves Edwards by rear-naked choke at UFC: Fight For The Troops 2.

The bout will be Palaszewski’s first in the UFC having fought seven times for the WEC compiling a 4-3 record while fighting for the now defunct Zuffa-owned promotion. After racking up three wins in a row in the WEC, Palaszewski dropped his final fight for the organization, by razor-close split decision to Kamal Shalorus at WEC 53 in December.

Another bout that was revealed today was a UFC 131 middleweight tilt between undefeated TUF 11 contestant Nick Ring (11-0) and UFC newcomer James Head (7-1) set for the Rogers Arena in Vancouver, BC.

With Ben on vacation this week, Mike takes the wheel of the show with Chad riding shotgun. Besides running through some of the week’s top news, the guys run down Saturday night’s UFC Fight for the Troops card which will feature our three guests on the show, Cody McKenzie, Melvin Guillard and Pat Barry.

As always,  The Bum Rush is available on iTunes or via direct download by right-clicking HERE.

If you like the show, all that we ask is that you continue to listen, tell a friend or 500 and give us some positive feedback in iTunes. And if you can’t stand listening to the three of us pretend to know what we’re talking about, then leave some comments below so we can work to make the show better for you.

("What has two thumbs, wears a red jersey and has an insatiable hunger for Hot Pockets right now?" PicProps: Ultimate Fighter.com)

Not to get sidetracked by the psychology of it all, but clearly a certain amount of success in athletics must be based on not thinking about it too much. Hence, the stunning percentage of dumb guys who are also professional athletes. Now, we’re not trying to say that Cody McKenzie is dumb, per se, only that he sure doesn’t appear to over think things. In fact, perhaps that blind confidence – coupled with a freaky guillotine — is his greatest strength as a fighter. There’s something about McKenzie’s particular blend of boundless enthusiasm and wanton hubris that we find incredibly endearing. His surprising run on “TUF 12,” during which he performed the MMA equivalent of continually poking a sleeping grizzly bear with a stick by talking an endless stream of shit to Josh Koscheck, was enough to win our hearts. His choke-out of Aaron Wilkinson at the show’s live finale? Well, that was just hilarious.

From the outside looking in, it appears the UFC may be just as bemused by McKenzie as we are, perhaps vowing to just keep giving him fights in rapid succession until somebody beats him. That – paired with the fact the kid just doesn’t seem know any better – would explain why the company is moving him straight from his victory over Wilkinson earlier this month into a short-notice fight with Yves Edwards on Jan. 22. It would also explain why he’s prone to say stuff like this: “I’d love to be able to cut down to 145 and fight (Jose) Aldo,” McKenzie told MMA Junkie this week. “I respect the guy, but I think that would be a war.”

Yeah, no. Clearly a complete inability to conceptualize your own limitations can only take you so far.

(Dude. Yikes. Photos courtesy of UFC.com)

Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve just received word that Cody "The French Revolution" McKenzie has agreed to take on Yves Edwards at UFC Fight for the Troops 2 on January 22nd, after Edwards’s original opponent was drafted for the main event. (It should be noted that Edwards has never lost by guillotine choke in 56 career fights.) McKenzie’s big return made us wonder — what does the future hold for the other winners of last Saturday’s UFC event? Well gather around, kids, and we’ll tell you what should happen…

Jonathan Brookins: You know how this works. In his first post-TUF outing, Brookins needs to be built up against a relatively established vet who happens to be vulnerable against his skill-set. So, who’s a chokable, lateral-droppable lightweight who you’ve heard of, but who doesn’t have the kind of striking skills that will make Brookins look foolish? Huh. That actually doesn’t leave a lot of options among the UFC’s current roster.

This is going to sound random as hell, but I think the UFC needs to bring back Matt Veach. Though the H.I.T. Squad fighter was released by the UFC earlier this year after consecutive losses to Frankie Edgar and Paul Kelly (both by submission), he’s gone on to win three straight in smaller promotions; he was also undefeated before he came to the UFC, scoring stoppages in nine out of ten fights. I think we all want to see Brookins developed slowly in winnable matchups; still, Veach is far from a pushover.

(Props: ‘caposa’ on the UG)

Today’s GIF party features a couple of animated highlights from the TUF 12 Finale‘s unaired prelims, as well as the Spike broadcast. First up, the night’s only knockout — Pablo Garza’s flying-knee-KO of Fredson Paixao, which came just 51 seconds into round one and scored Garza a $30,000 Knockout of the Night bonus. As if the KO wasn’t impressive enough, check out Steve Mazzagatti flying in from 15 feet away to tackle Garza before he makes Paixao’s concussion any worse than it needs to be. 

After the jump: The "Pace choke," the McKenzitine, and the stunned expessions following Phan vs. Garcia.

(Above: "Remember, remember, the fourth of December, the Gunpowder Treason and plot. I know of no reason why the Gunpowder Treason should ever be forgot, brah." 
Below: You know what to do, honey. / Photos courtesy of UFC.com)

Welcome, fight fans, to the first leg of a liveblog double-header on CagePotato.com. The TUF 12 Finale gets rolling on Spike at 9 p.m. ET, with Team GSP lightweight finalists Jonathan Brookins and Michael Johnson battling for the highly coveted glassware, Stephan Bonnar trying to build a winning streak against Igor Pokrajac, and Demian Maia tangling with rangy TUF 3 winner Kendall Grove. Plus, five other TUF 12 vets will do their best to hang on to their UFC contracts, including Nam Phan, who clashes with hardy slugger Leonard Garcia in the UFC’s first-ever televised 145-pound feature. (Yes, the UFC has featherweights now!)

Round-by-round results await you after the jump; refresh the page every few minutes to get all the latest. Please toss in your two cents in the comments section, and don’t forget to check in at our viewing party at PlayPhilo.com for a chance to win a UFC: Ultimate 100 Greatest Fights DVD set. 

(Jonathan Brookins’s lateral drop even worked on Jose Aldo, back at WEC 36. No one is safe. Props: NHB USA)

We’ve officially entered the quarterfinals, and last night’s episode gave us two of ‘em: Sako Chivitchian vs. Jonathan Brookins, and Cody McKenzie vs. Nam Phan. But you already know what happens in the McKenzie/Phan fight, right?

At the house, Sevak Magakian explains to his bro Sako that he has to redeem the Armenian race and beat Brookins, who is representing the Fraggle race. "Sak you gotta do this bro," Sevak says. "You gotta beat him, whatever it takes. I couldn’t do it, now you have to do it…There’s not gonna be two Armenians gonna lose to the same guy…you’re gonna fuck him." Wow, that’s some threat. Magakian has clearly been studying at the Wanderlei Silva school of trash talk.

Coach GSP wants to train his quarterfinalists like he trains when he’s about to fight — one training session a day, no more hard sparring or hardcore workouts. The focus is tactical now. He wants to make the guys feel hungry, like they’re not training enough, and build up their aggression for the fight.

We’re happy to announce that from now until the end of the season, The Ultimate Fighter‘s "Aftermath" online series will be exclusively embedded on CagePotato.com. So be sure to come by after each episode and watch Stephan Bonnar yuk it up with the week’s winners and losers. In this installment, Nam Phan, Cody McKenzie, and Jonathan Brookins — wearing a Nam Phan for Mayor t-shirt that I’ll probably be ordering for myself — drop in to discuss Marc Stevens’s "Party Boy" routine, GSP’s surprising gameplan for McKenzie, Nam Phan’s possibly-illegal elbows, what weights they’ll be competing at after the show, and lots more. We won’t throw out any spoilers now, but you can read the full episode recap tomorrow on the site.

(Ortiz and Liddell will settle their grudge once and for all on New Year’s Eve…OR WILL THEY?? / Photo courtesy of CombatLifestyle)

One of my weekly MMA must-reads is the "Sunday Morning Rumor Mill" column on MiddleEasy, which features a bunch of juicy stories that just might be true. In homage to our pals, we’d like to start a similar feature on CagePotato — except ours will work a little differently. Of the eight items you see below, seven have been pulled directly out of our asses. The other one is absolutely, positively, 100% true, and has been confirmed by inside sources. Which one is it? We’d rather not say, due to legal reasons. You’ll have to figure it out yourself…

– Vinicius Quieroz wasn’t the only fighter who was caught by the UFC’s independent drug-testing at UFC 120. There was a second guy who pissed hot for the same steroid, but the company decided to let him off with a private (but very stern) warning. Hint: Main card, but not main event.

– Arianny Celeste has been dating a former UFC fighter for the past year, but has kept the relationship hidden from the public, in order to protect the fantasy that she’s "available" to her fans. We can’t reveal her boyfriend’s name, but his initials are Tiki Ghosn.

(The Stevens vs. McKenzie "fight," if you can call it that. Props: TheMMAResource)

Still giddy from his squad’s first victory, Josh Koscheck starts picking on Team GSP’s Michael Johnson, telling him he looks heavy, he gassed out in his fight against Aaron Wilkinson, and he would have lost if not for that beast-like surge at the end. Kos’s entire team is equally assholish, continuing their celebration into the night, screaming in the house like complete jackasses. Koscheck shows up with burgers and Johnson asks him why he has to be such a dick. Josh denies he’s a dick; he just loves yellow. You can’t really fault a man for that.

Koscheck also loves being in the power-position for the first time in the season. He finally has control of the matchups, and during a team discussion, the idea of Marc Stevens (his #1 pick) vs. Cody McKenzie (GSP’s #6 pick) is floated. They figure that as long as they stay away from Cody’s famous guillotine choke, it’s a good matchup for them. Since this is one of those two-fight episodes, we know that whatever happens, it’s not gonna last long.

Kos announces Stevens vs. McKenzie as his match selection, and the two lightweights face off for the first time. "You don’t have to puff your chest out like that," Stevens says to McKenzie. "Exhale…it’s not very friendly." Cody mean-mugs Stevens, but then grins and chin-checks Koscheck again before walking off, just like he did last episode. Koscheck has to be reminded that this should piss him off. "Cut his fingers off the next time he does that to you," Sako says. "We can’t even understand you," Cody deadpans to the Armenian. It’s personal now. Yellow doesn’t like Cody McKenzie, no sir.

(Nam Phan vs. Mike Budnik. Props: eze32101)

No need for a lengthy preamble — you’ve already seen the first five minutes of the Ultimate Fighter: Team GSP vs. Team Koscheck season premiere, and you know how these things generally go down. We’ve got 28 lightweights, battling for 14 spots. Dana White addresses the troops, Bruce Leroy giggles with anticipation. It’s the elimination round, where the RFFs (real fucking fighters) are separated from the pretenders. Let’s get it.

Marc Stevens vs. TJ O’Brien 
Stevens wrestled at the University of Buffalo when Josh Koscheck was the assistant wrestling coach there. Kos calls him an "okay wrestler." Stevens immediately lands a huge overhand right, then jackhammers O’Brien on the ground until the ref steps in. We later learn that the 13-second TKO is the fastest stoppage in TUF history. "Remember me now?" Stevens asks Koscheck.

Spencer Paige vs. Steve Magdaleno
Paige’s striking is as good as advertised, as he lands a mix of attacks in round 1. Magdaleno ends the round on top, working some ground-and-pound, but it might not be enough to steal the round. They start round 2 swinging for the fences before Paige starts blasting Magdaleno with knees. Magdaleno shoots on Paige and dumps him. Magdaleno looks for an arm triangle, then goes back to abusing Paige from the top. Magdaleno drops to guard when the action goes standing again, and possibly blows the fight, as Paige finishes strong with strikes from the top. Paige takes the unanimous decision.

Spike has revealed the full cast of 28 lightweights who will be appearing on The Ultimate Fighter: Team GSP vs. Team Koscheck, which premieres September 15th at 10 p.m., following UFC Fight Night 22. Of course, 14 of these guys will be eliminated in the first episode, so watch this trailer and get to know them while you still can. Some of the competitors jumped out at us, for various reasons…

The guys we’ve actually heard of: Nam Phan is a nine-year veteran of the sport who has competed for Strikeforce and Sengoku. Mike Budnik has already had a stint as a 155′er in the WEC, but was released after three straight losses to Shane Roller, John Franchi, and Rafael Dias.

The guy with the horrible nickname: Paul "The Wheel" Barrow. Christ. That’s even worse than Nick "The Promise" Ring.

Impressive stat alert: Cody McKenzie has finished his last nine opponents via first-round guillotine choke. That does indeed make him the #2 guillotine-choker in the world, among active fighters; only Travis Fulton (12) owns more.

The inevitable "crazy hair" guys: Jason Brenton (green hair), Alex Caceres (Yagerfro), Jeff Lentz (red hair), Marc Stevens (mohawk), Dane Sayers (red mohawk).

Full cast list is after the jump…