Whether you think Dan Henderson is the greatest American fighter in MMA history, or just an “older, slower version of Rashad Evans,” one thing’s indisputable — the man has paid his dues. Fifteen years after beginning his pro MMA career, Henderson is (once again) heading into the biggest fight of his life, this time against UFC light-heavyweight champion Jon Jones at UFC 151 on September 1st. And as we usually like to do with our favorite fighters, we decided to pay tribute to the man by rounding up some of the best Hendo-related GIFs on the Internet. Check ‘em out after the jump, and let us know if you think the 5-1 underdog can shock the world in two weeks.

Five rounds against Machida could save you five percent or more on UFC PPVs.

As flawless as UFC light-heavyweight champion Jon “Bones” Jones has looked inside the Octagon, he’s looked just as imperfect outside of it. There’s his unchecked arrogance, his “You never have to worry about me with a DWI or doing something crazy” comment just weeks before his DUI arrest and his brutal honesty about potential opponents. Basically, Jon Jones does everything in his power outside of the cage to make it hard for most fans to celebrate his in-sport accomplishments.

Which is why most of you won’t be too surprised to learn that just two weeks before his Light-Heavyweight title defense against the legendary Dan Henderson at UFC 151, Jones had some pretty harsh words for his next opponent, Lyoto Machida. In an interview with ESPN.com, Jones stated that “The Dragon” doesn’t deserve a rematch with him, not so much because he isn’t a competent fighter, but because Machida won’t get the fans to buy pay-per-views. In his own words:

“I don’t want to fight Lyoto Machida. He was my lowest pay-per-view draw of last year. No one wants to see me fight Lyoto Machida. I don’t want to fight Lyoto again. Lyoto is high risk and low reward. He’s a tough fighter, but no one wants to buy that fight.

Quote continued after the jump

(When all else fails, a hypogonadism burn is always a solid standby.) 

Apparently Jon Jones is unaware that Chael Sonnen is a fight promoter first, troll second, and actual fighter third. Be that as it may, “Bones” must have really took to heart the relatively light bit of trash-talking Sonnen aimed in the champ’s direction when announcing his return to the light-heavyweight division on UFC Tonight, as he has already responded, then deleted, several scathing remarks aimed at the former middleweight title challenger via Twitter, because of course he did.

If we’ve learned anything about what arguments over Twitter inevitably lead to, we’re probably going to need a bigger facepalm and a fresh pair of trousers for one of these gentlemen in the near future.

The rest of Jones’ comments are after the jump.

Not to come off sounding like a bunch of know-it-alls, but we’re pretty sure we’ve figured out the formula to make the perfect trailer for any upcoming UFC event. It’s simple really:

1. Pick out the best highlights of the champion destroying his former opponents, preferably in slow-mo

2. Insert Joe Rogan quote, something about said champ being “untouchable” or “the greatest”

3. Fade in “Lux Aeterna” by Clint Mansell, usually the orchestral Lord of the Rings version

4. BIG, BOLD TEXT DECLARING THAT THE CHALLENGER IS AN ENTIRELY DIFFERENT BREED OF ANIMAL

5. As the song enters its second half, cut to several clips of the challenger destroying his former opponents, now in real or even sped up time.

6. Mike Goldberg yelling “Oh my” or “It is all over!”

7. Close on a dramatic, sudden cut to the event text/details.

The marketing department behind the UFC 151 promo clearly adhered to this formula, resulting in a trailer that will undoubtedly get your panties, your wife’s panties, and your slutty mistresses crotchless panties all bunched up in anticipation for the blood-soaked throwdown that will be Jones vs. Henderson on September 1st.

Check it out after the jump.

(“Hi Rashad”)

Ace MMA Fighting reporter Mike Chiappetta has the biggest business scoop in the sport this week – UFC light heavyweight champion Jon Jones has signed a global deal with sportswear giant Nike. “The two sides have agreed to a multi-year contract that will see Jones decked out in Nike gear for the foreseeable future. On Sept. 1, when he faces Dan Henderson at UFC 151, Jones will be rocking the famous ‘Swoosh,’” Chiappetta reports.

“As a part of the deal, Jones will be featured on worldwide Nike advertising and receive his own signature line, sources said. It is expected to be announced within a week.”

It’s good to know that we weren’t alone in our confusion when it was announced that the winner of either the Mauricio Rua/Brandon Vera or Lyoto Machida/Ryan Bader bouts, specifically the former, would be in line for the next title shot at 205 lbs. Given that current champion Jon Jones has walked through all four of those gentlemen before, we struggled to find the reasoning behind the alleged title shot that supposedly awaited the most impressive winner from this weekend’s UFC on FOX 4 event. Then again, Rich Franklin has decided to chase after middleweight gold and revenge for a third time (which totally wont end in his untimely death), so maybe we were too quick to write off these former champions, TUF winners, and hype machines. In either case, Bones took to his Twitter account to voice his frustration, sending out the above tweet yesterday which simply states “Scratching my head.”

But perhaps even more confounding than the UFC’s apparent apathy in regards to JBJ was the realization that the light heavyweight division, one of the most stacked and competitive divisions in the UFC for some time, has nearly been cleared out in a little over a year. If Jones gets past Dan Henderson at UFC 151, something he obviously feels he is going to do as evidenced by the above tweet, there will arguably be only two viable candidates left for him to face: Alexander Gustafsson and Glover Teixeira.

Dana White has teased that the man known by the Potato Nation as “Bjones” is “ready for a big fight now”, leading us to believe that a meeting with Rashad Evans could be on the horizon. A victory over the former champ would all but cement the Swede’s position atop the division. As for Teixeira, it’s simply too early to tell. He looked great in his debut victory over Kyle Kingsbury, but needs to face at least one of the upper echelon fighters before we are convinced he is ready for a title shot. But for the moment, it appears that the LHW division needs an H-bomb like Nick Diaz needs a clue.

In other, alcohol-related Jon Jones news…

Over the last ten years, we’ve watched Mauricio “Shogun” Rua go from young phenom to living legend. Though injuries and and controversial judging have occasionally slowed his momentum during the second half of his career, Shogun enters next weekend’s UFC on FOX 4 matchup with Brandon Vera as a standard-bearer for his generation of fighters, and is still considered among the elite of the light-heavyweight division.

In honor of Rua’s continuing legacy, we’ve picked out the 16 videos that best summarize his journey as a fighter — from the past to the present, from his most unforgettable triumphs to his most crushing defeats. Enjoy, and pay your respects in the comments section.

Mauricio Rua vs. Rodrigo Malheiros de Andrade. Shot in 1998 when Rua was just 16 years old, this footage shows the future PRIDE/UFC star competing in a Muay Thai smoker in somebody’s house in Curitiba, Brazil. Though Shogun shows flashes of his trademark aggression, his technique hasn’t quite blossomed yet, and he winds up getting head-kick KO’d at the video’s 7:15 mark.

Mauricio Rua vs. Rafael Freitas, Meca World Vale Tudo 7, 11/8/02. Rua was 20 years old when he made his official MMA debut against Rafael “Capoeira” Freitas, who was tenacious in his attempts to put Shogun on his back. But Freitas couldn’t keep him there, and the standup exchanges were lopsided in Rua’s favor. After a few minutes of abusing his opponent with knees, punches, and stomps, Shogun finally puts Freitas out cold with a head-kick.

(If you were a guest on that gay Indian party bus and want to share your story, please e-mail tips@cagepotato.com.)

Thanks to everyone who submitted stories for today’s crowd-sourced edition of the CagePotato Roundtable. We’ve selected 12 tales from the pile — ranging from drama to comedy to horror — and we’ll begin with a story that comes to us from an actual pro fighter, involving one of MMA’s greatest out-of-the-cage rivalries…

Sal Woods
A few years ago I fought on the Strikeforce: Lawler vs. Shields card. While at weigh-ins I was obviously star-struck from being at Al Hrabosky’s with a room full of legends and badasses. The only guy I had the balls to say what’s up to was Nick Diaz. He was completely cool and super polite, he said hi and introduced himself to the entire table (my cornermen, shaking each one’s hand). We were just shooting the shit about how it was my first time on a big card and that I was fighting T-Wood. I was thinking this dude is nothing like the interviews I have watched.

All of a sudden he looks over and sees Joe Riggs and almost flips shit, starts telling his corner guys “there’s that little bitch right there!” Looks over a crowd of people and called Riggs a punk bitch. Then Gil and someone else walked him away/cooled him down. Proved that if Nick doesn’t like you and fights you he may fight you again in the hospital and almost again at completely different fight’s weigh-in!

Noah “Jewjifshoe” Ferreira

You guys all remember Dan Barrera from TUF 6, right? Well I met him during a math class in the Fall of 2011 and it was one of the weirdest experiences I’ve ever had.

(Well said.)

Twitter holds an interesting place in the MMA landscape. On one hand, it often comes across as little more than a medium for fighters to vent their frustrations with the foresight and competency of a middle school dropout, or to aid in the ongoing series of endless, needless arguments that constitute 90% of the internet nowadays. Seriously, I was on one of those porn sites that allow comments the other day and stumbled across a heated argument concerning what the woman fellating the donkey onscreen was probably thinking. My guess was that she was reconsidering her choice to forgo those online courses for some quick cash and a shot at Fame (which coincidentally was the horse’s name), but the two (probable) gentlemen involved in said dispute seemed to think she was trying to determine the ethnicity of said horse (if that’s a thing), and which race she likely decided upon. Did I mention she was blindfolded? She was blindfolded.

On the other hand, “The Twitter” has shown on several occasions that it can serve as more than a battleground for our petty arguments, and can actually be used as a tool to unite people from opposite ends of the planet over a given cause. Although it failed in the end, Twitter was almost solely responsible for giving Mark Hunt the opportunity of a lifetime, or bringing Tim Sylvia back to the UFC to dominate 85% of the promotion’s heavyweights like we all know he would (I mean, have you even seen his workout regimen?).

And one thing that the collective minds of Twitter seemed to reach an agreement on was that UFC 149, to put it professionally, sucked major donkey dick (see how I brought that all together? I’m less a writer, more a prophet). So in order to bid what will ultimately go down as one of the most disappointing main cards in UFC history adieu, we’ve collected some of the funniest tweets from around the Twittersphere, some from actual fighters, others from random jagoffs with the simple ability to hashtag UFC 149 after their comment, for your viewing pleasure. Enjoy.

(Live UFC 149 weigh-in video, via YouTube.com/UFC. First fighter steps on the scale at 6 p.m. ET / 3 p.m. PT.)

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