Okay, maybe some explanation is in order…

Cagepotato.com Interviews Dana White – Watch more Funny Videos

The last time Cage Potato sent one of our wily female correspondents to interview a UFC star, it very nearly ended in a sexual assault.  But undaunted, we decided to try again when we heard Dana White would be at the recent “Ultimate Fighter” tryouts, and fortunately for our enthusiastic young interviewer DW is no “Rampage” Jackson.  In this exclusive video interview the UFC prez calls accusations that the UFC gave Kimbo Slice preferential treatment a “crock of shit,” saying that Kimbo had his manager present at his TUF fight, which he claims isn’t necessarily all that special, but no entourage and certainly no phone calls home.  White blames it all on Roy Nelson, but “Big Country isn’t the only one singing that song.  As for his remarks about TUF not being over till it’s over, well, I think we all know what that means: Poppa Slice is going to get to bang again, eventually.

All this, plus commentary on UFC 104, Junie Browning’s departure from the UFC, and what prompted Jackson’s supposed retirement from the UFC in this exclusive video interview.  Enjoy.

Well, this is terrible news.  According to Yahoo! Sports, Brock Lesnar has pulled out of his heavyweight title defense at UFC 106 due to an illness that has sidelined him for "more than three-and-a-half weeks."  Lesnar reportedly told Dana White that he’s never been this sick before, but White, who is not in any way a medical doctor, says he does not believe it’s the Swine Flu, though the Yahoo! article doesn’t say what prompted that diagnosis. 

Judging by Shane Carwin’s Twitter, he heard the news from the MMA media and still hasn’t received any official confirmation from the UFC.  There’s no word yet on exactly how the UFC will reshuffle the lineup for UFC 106, or when Lesnar might be ready to make that title defense.  Right now, all we have is a sick heavyweight champ and a disappointed challenger.  This is why you have to wash your hands, people.  Especially after handling dead woodland creatures or sharing shotguns with strangers.

(Dana White discusses the impending Machida/Rua rematch, and UFC 104′s other fighters weigh-in on last night’s controversial decision. Also, Steve Mazzagatti shouldn’t be allowed to even *watch* MMA. Props to MMA Fanhouse.) 

- Don’t ask us how two of the three judges who presided over last night’s main event gave the first three rounds to the champion. Just take comfort in the fact that there will be an immediate rematch between Lyoto Machida and Mauricio Rua. Dana White announced the news at yesterday’s post-fight press conference, saying "They won’t make the same mistakes next time. Each one will try to win decisively." For the record, DW thought Shogun won the fight.

- Anthony Johnson was basically fined $10,000 per pound for missing weight. After tipping the scales at 176 on Friday, Rumble scored a ferocious TKO victory over Yoshiyuki Yoshida in just 39 seconds. But because he came in heavy, he was ineligible for UFC 104′s $60,000 Knockout of the Night bonus, which instead went to Pat Barry. (Barry picked up a second $60,000 award for Fight of the Night; his opponent Antoni Hardonk got a check for the same amount, while beanpole submission artist Stefan Struve was awarded the Submission of the Night bonus for his triangle choke of Chase Gormley.) Johnson was already giving up 20% of his purse. When asked about the botched weight-cut, AJ had this to say:

(Props: MMA Fanhouse)

Following yesterday’s UFC 104 press conference, AllElbows.com‘s E. Casey Leydon got up in Dana White‘s face, and the conversation inevitably turned to Kimbo Slice. Despite multiple reports from TUF 10 castmembers that Kimbo had a large "posse" in attendance for his fight — yes, that’s the word they keep using — Dana claims that only Slice’s manager was there, while his wife and kids were definitely not. "I’ve never seen such crybabies in my whole life as the heavyweights [on TUF 10]," Dana says. Here’s another example: Roy Nelson told USA Today that Kimbo had his own media room and could make phone calls. Dana’s response:

After the jump: A longer DW interview with Ariel Helwani, where Dana discusses Cain Velasquez‘s potential as a future champ, selling two Brazilian main-eventers, the necessity of teammates fighting each other, an update on the Dan Henderson situation, those Showtime knuckleheads, Bernard Hopkins’s criticism of MMA as gay porno, why "Big" John McCarthy isn’t reffing at UFC 104, and Chuck Liddell’s future in the sport.

The 10/20 edition of the Danavlog is full of bad omens. After getting a bullshit ticket from some douchebag traffic cop, DW and his crew stop by Cold Stone Creamery — not Pinkberry — and Dana winds up paying the price with a tummy ache. And the Cold Stone workers didn’t even sing to him! Can this day get any worse? WHAT HAS HE DONE TO OFFEND YOU, GOD?

As if he doesn’t have enough problems, Dana has an Esquire writer following him around for a profile. So obviously he’s going to try out the bomb bag again. It fails so incredibly hard. Seriously, listen to that barely audible pop at the 3:13 mark. "Something’s bursting," Mike says. Hilarious. Then, it’s time to play video games and air hockey at Dave & Buster’s. Are you getting all this, Esquire guy?

Finally, around the 5:40 mark, Cain Velasquez and Mauricio Rua show up, and it isn’t long before Dana bomb-bags them. Suck it, Bellator — this is how you harness the power of the Internet to promote fighters. Also, future Celebrity Rehab star Chuck Liddell shows up drunk and belligerent, and lifts Dana off the ground as he’s trying to give out some UFC 104 tickets. All in a day’s work, I guess, if you can legitimately call it that.

One of things we didn’t see in Dana White’s most recent video blog from the lovely Casablanca hotel and casino in Mesquite, Nevada was him sitting down for a conversation with Raw Vegas‘ Dave Farra.  Not that we blame DW for cutting that portion out.  I mean, talking to Dave isn’t going to be the highlight of anyone’s night, trust me.  But it is interesting to hear how White characterizes his negotiations with Dan Henderson, and just how different that characterization is from the way Hendo sees things.  According to White, they couldn’t come to terms with Henderson because he "was looking for an obscene amount of money."  Now there’s an interesting use of the past tense.  Chances are that if you asked Henderson, he’d tell you that he continues to want that same amount of money in the present.

Well, they’re back.  UFC president Dana White may say that he’s done doing video blogs from time to time, but who’s he kidding, the siren’s song of talking into a camera is impossible to resist for very long.  In this edition, DW travels to Mesquite, Nevada to watch his cousin lose a fight (though we don’t get to see exactly how he loses, which is weird).  After that he heads to Los Angeles to give away some UFC 104 tickets with the help of Twitter, which, to hear Dana tell it, is the most magical invention of the last fifty years.  Don’t get us wrong, we use it too, but does he realize that it’s basically just Facebook status updates without any of the other perks?

After the jump, a preview of the UFC 104 "Countdown" show, including Lyoto Machida‘s hero’s welcome in Brazil after winning the light heavyweight strap.  What do you want to bet that Rashad Evans did not get the same response when he won it?

(Props: Bloomberg.)

In the same month that Zuffa announced it had taken out a $100 million loan to pay off part of a revolving credit line and provide a payout to the owners, Dana White is now hinting that a 10-15% stake in the UFC could be sold to a private investor. As he told Bloomberg News:

Hmm. How much cash does Shane McMahon have laying around at the moment? And why does Zuffa need so much of it lately? Has the UFC become financially overextended? Are the Fertitta Brothers looking to cash out following the Station Casinos collapse? At any rate, if you have nine figures to invest in an exciting sports property and don’t mind the fact that you’ll have zero input in the company’s direction, give Dana a call.

(Somebody go tell Bisping that the coast is clear now.)

Remember those contract negotiations that between Dan Henderson and the UFC that had slowed down of late?  Apparently they slowed all the way to a halt, and now Hendo may be headed for Strikeforce.  The crazy part? UFC president Dana White seems content to just watch him go:

“We have a good relationship with Henderson, and there are no hard feelings,” White said. “He had a figure he believed he was worth, and we had our own figure, and we weren’t able to get together.”

Just like that, Henderson’s highlight-reel knockout of Michael Bisping goes from a career-rejuvenator to a UFC swan song.  DW can’t really hold this one against Strikeforce if they do end up signing Henderson, though his grudges haven’t necessarily been limited by rationality in the past.  Still, the UFC had every chance to keep Hendo and ultimately decided he wasn’t worth the money he wanted.  What, did they feel like they had too many credible middleweight contenders at the moment?

(For the sake of perspective, let’s recall how "The Simpsons" has portrayed the boxing world in the past.)

Here’s a newsflash for you.  Remember that MMA-themed episode of “The Simpsons” that we were pleasantly surprised with, if only because it wasn’t as hackneyed and completely unfunny as every episode of the show for the last six or seven years has been?  Well, UFC president Dana White wasn’t laughing, and not just because he lacks the ability to find anything funny if it doesn’t involve someone getting shocked:

"I was disappointed," White says. "I think it was typical of people that don’t know anything about the sport. I know it’s for fun, but the second half of it really wasn’t even funny. …We like fighting.  But to make it sound like the UFC crowd is this bloodthirsty crowd that shows up and just want to see people get their (butts) kicked — that’s not true. That’s the stigma that the mainstream has of us. … The Simpsons program will show you how mainstream we’re not.” 

While it’s hard to argue with DW when he says that the portrayal of MMA and its fans on a cartoon comedy was a little reductive and not 100% accurate, it seems like he’s missing the point.  This is an over-the-top attempt at satire.  When “The Simpsons” does shows on anything – even mainstream sports like football or baseball – accurate representation is not the goal.  For instance, there’s this:

Yesterday we told you about Dana White’s attempt to liken Fedor Emelianenko’s management to local shakedown operation, and while that was all good fun, there was definitely more to his appearance on ESPN’s "Jim Rome Is Burning."  Say what you will about Jim Rome’s douchey used-car-salesman-meets-strip-club-owner persona, he’s more knowledgeable about MMA than most mainstream sports commentators, and he takes the sport seriously rather than treating it as a fad that will be gone as soon as the kids today discover this new roller derby craze. 

Again, though, DW can’t help but insist that a fight between bros-for-life Anderson Silva and Lyoto Machida is a very real possibility at light heavyweight.  No matter how many times they say they won’t do it, Dana can’t let it go.  You know what?  I think those two should break down and do the fight.  On one condition: Dana White must fight Herschel Walker.  And yeah, I know Walker has a Strikeforce contract, but that hasn’t stopped Alistair Overeem from doing whatever the hell he wants.

(Junie Browning: Ready for the orgy.)

Anybody who watched the eighth season of The Ultimate Fighter could tell you that Junie Allen Browning is as crazy as a peach-orchard boar. But after moving to Las Vegas to train full-time, it seemed like "The Lunatic" was slowly going sane. Well, not so much. According to the Las Vegas Review Journal (via CageWriter), Browning was rushed to St. Rose Dominican Hospital on Tuesday night after taking 16 Klonopin pills in an apparent suicide attempt. It was just the beginning of Junie’s troubles:

(Dana White and the UFC’s Chief Financial Officer, Bobo, share a laugh over M-1′s contract demands.)

One of the things you have to like about Dana White is that when he gets in front of a national audience, he really steps up his trash talk game.  When it’s just the MMA media, sure, he might recycle the same tired phrases and well-worn burns, but talking to ESPN’s Jim Rome today, he brought out some new material with regards to those M-1 Global jokers and their absurd demands during the UFC’s Fedor negotiations:

"Fedor’s not afraid to come over and fight or do any of that stuff.  He’s got nutty managers.  These guys are from Russia, coming to America trying to strong-arm us into some deal we won’t want to do.  Go do that to the butcher down the street in Russia.  It won’t work over here in the United States."

Please, tell me I’m not the only one who feels like launching into a U.S.A chant right now. So let’s see, instead of calling Fedor’s management a bunch of greedy, crazy Russians, they’ve now become "nutty" Russians who are trying to run some sort of MMA-themed protection racket.  Nice little paradigm shift, DW.  Just one more reason why it really sucks to be a Russian butcher.

(Click the image to watch the video on Spike.com.)

Kimbo Slice must have had other plans that day, but luckily Roy Nelson and Dana White were free to hang with Amir Sadollah for the latest edition of Spike.com‘s TUF 10 wrap-up show, The Aftermath. Dana does his best to debunk some rumors: No, he doesn’t have influence on when fights are stopped on the show — and how dare you suggest otherwise, Roy — and no, the alcohol isn’t provided for dramatic purposes. All booze is requested by the fighters themselves, not that drunken jackassery has been a problem on this season so far. (Still, Wes Sims can’t stay dry forever.) There’s also an interesting moment where Dana gets on Roy’s case for not joining a major camp. ("I think that it hurts you as a fighter…to not be sparring and training with guys that are going to push you every day.") And he’s still a little irritated about Roy’s post-fight Whopper order.

Later, the panel analyzes what Kimbo needs to do to be competitive in MMA, and Dana addresses the status of Quinton "Rampage," "B.A. Baracus" Jackson: "Rampage [announced] he’s retired because he’s mad at me. And I’m mad at him. It happens sometimes. I’m sure we’ll get this thing figured out, and I’m sure we’ll see him and Rashad fight. I highly doubt that Rampage is really retired."

("I took care of that thing for you, Godfather. Let’s just say the Hawaiian won’t be jumping out of any more pools." Photo courtesy of ESPN.)

After a month-long voting period that drew over 500,000 ballots, AskMen.com released its Top 49 Most Influential Men of 2009 list today, and it turns out that a shocking number of AskMen’s readers want to be Dana White when they grow up. Coming in at #10, the UFC president managed to beat out such heavy hitters as Jay-Z (#11), Jon Stewart (#13), Quentin Tarantino (#15), Conan O’Brien (#16), Brad Pitt (#21), Manny Pacquiao (#24), and Kanye West (#26). He also came in ahead of one of his star employees, welterweight champion Georges St. Pierre, who made the list at a very respectable #36, right between Andy Roddick and Coldplay’s Chris Martin. Said Dana of his impressively high placement on the Top 49:

Oddly enough, the list’s #1 spot was taken by a fictional character — Don Draper, the smooth-talking, scotch-drinking, stewardess-banging superhero of AMC’s Mad Men. (Sorry, Jon Hamm, you’ll get ‘em next year.) You can check out the rest of the list right here.

Previously: Gina Carano is the 73rd Hottest Woman in the World

(You know, without his beard, Kimbo kind of looks like Reginald VelJohnson. Props to CagePotato reader ‘DopenesS’.)

It’s weeks like these that prove how unbelievably smart, funny, and cultured CagePotato’s readers are, in comparison to the slack-jawed readers of other MMA websites. Seriously, we love you guys (no homo). Here are three highlights from a wild week in the trenches of the CP comments sections…

whitey on "Strikeforce News Roundup: Cris Cyborg Injured, Bobby Lashley Negotiating + More":
if only Da Vinci was alive to see his vision of the perfect man in flesh and bone

K.E.G. on "Gina Carano Semi-Nudity to Hit Newsstands on 10/9":
Hopefully they will leave out the obvious pages on…
-Tra telligman’s weird chest.
-Josh Haynes’s extra skin
-Jacare’s vagina head
-Kimbo’s beard/manscaped chest hair
-Cyborg’s penis
-Tito’s massively swollen head
-Kaleb Starnes’s vagina

After the jump: A strong front-runner for comment of the year…

(Look, we’re just as upset as you are. Photo courtesy of URDirt.)

It wasn’t long ago that Dana White was telling us that The Ultimate Fighter: Heavyweights was "some of the best television ever." (Ever! Right up there with the Newhart finale!) But after three weeks, reality is beginning to set in. What we’ve gotten, above everything else, is three embarassingly bad fights: Jon Madsen‘s one-sided takedown clinic against the hapless Abe Wagner, James McSweeney‘s sloppy and questionably deserved decision win over Wes "Wheezy" Shivers, and Roy Nelson‘s methodical, anti-climactic TKO of Kimbo Slice. It’s a shame that all those new viewers haven’t seen any quality MMA matches so far. Well, Dana feels your pain, and recently jumped on the Real Talk Express with Yahoo!’s Kevin Iole:

Wait a minute, so the next four episodes suck too? Does this mean that when <SPOILERS>Kimbo replaces a feverish Marcus Jones in the next episode to take on Brendan Schaub</SPOILERS>, that fight’s no good either? Cripes. It doesn’t help that this season — like last season — isn’t offering much in the way of entertaining personalities or house drama. (Why The A-Hole Show hasn’t gotten any screen time yet is anybody’s guess.) Marcus is a black dude who loves flowers and 20-sided-dice? Oooooooh! Piss in a fucking fruit tray or stop wasting my time, okay?

(Walker’s steely focus is unwavering even — nay, *especially* — while giving his autograph to a pair of boobs. More HW pics at Combat Lifestyle.)

We still don’t know whether former NFL running back Herschel Walker can fight, but at least his appearance on ESPN’s “First Take” proved that he can talk as crazy a game as anyone in MMA, with the possible exception of Dan Quinn.  During an appearance to talk about his recent signing with Strikeforce, the 47-year-old Heisman Trophy winner challenged Dana White to a charity bout, expressed an interest in fighting Brock Lesnar, and said it would be no problem for him to beat up all the heavyweights on this season of “The Ultimate Fighter.”  Yep, that pretty much covers all the bases.  Someone’s done their MMA trash-talking homework: 

"Dana always tells people to put their money where their mouth is. I tell Dana if he thinks I’m so old, why doesn’t he step in the ring with me? He’s been practicing (MMA) as well. So maybe Dana and I can give all the money to charity. …I’ll put dimes to donuts, all the heavyweights on his show right now, I will beat.  That’s pretty easy to say.”

I gotta admit, I’m impressed.  It’s one thing to call out another fighter or promoter.  But to call out an entire reality show’s worth of fighters at once, and to say that it would be easy to beat them all down, despite the fact that you’ve never had a pro MMA fight?  Look out, Quinn.  If Herschel gets a camera to mount on his steering wheel, your days of being MMA’s undisputed nutcase may be at an end.

(The old arms-crossed staredown. That’s how they used to settle disputes in the Old West. At least before they discovered the practice of shooting each other.)

You knew it was only a matter of time.  To Dana White, signing a 47-year-old former NFL player to your roster of MMA fighters is like sending a skinny, fake-breasted, dolled-up blonde chick over to talk Chuck Liddell in a nightclub.  The response is predictable.  Talking with Fanhouse’s Mike Chiapetta, White started off a little slow this time, calling the signing simply “ridiculous,” instead of opting for the more vehement “fucking ridiculous,” that we’ve come to expect.  But don’t worry, he didn’t stop there:

"People think we’re anti-competition? We’re anti-dumb competition. Doing stupid things like this, putting a 50-year-old guy in the Octagon for the first time, and then going out there putting out press releases like it’s a big deal because you signed a 50-year-old Herschel Walker? Are you serious? …Strikeforce is a small, little, regional show.  The geniuses over at Showtime, these guys are the most arrogant, cocky, pompous jackasses I’ve ever met in my whole life. … Which athletic commission is going to let this guy fight?  Who the fuck are they going to find to fight Herschel Walker? A guy in a wheelchair?”

Now we await White’s apology to the American Association of People with Disabilities, wherein he takes the opportunity to say that he totally believes there are some guys in wheelchairs who could beat Walker in an MMA fight.  But White also lambasted the move as “disrespectful to the sport,” which seems like grounds enough for us to ask, does he have a point, or is he just saying what Dana White says when a competitor does anything?

(Props: CRE)

Well, nobody’s calling for his head yet, but it’s clear that Dana White and Rashad Evans are more than a little disappointed by the latest chapter in the Rampage Done Lost His Mind saga. During an appearance on the Carmichael Dave Show, White claimed that his criticisms of Quinton Jackson‘s acting pursuits were only done with Jackson’s best interests in mind:

("I want my belt back! And a prominent role in the next Wayans Brothers comedy!" Photo courtesy of Vancouver Sun.)

We’ve witnessed enough of Quinton Jackson‘s bizarre interviews and vehicular freak-outs to know that he’s not the most stable human being on the planet. But we were still shocked by the long blog entry he posted on his website last night, announcing his retirement from MMA; registration is required, so just click here if you’re not already a member. According to Jackson, his career with the UFC has been an endless run of unfortunate obligations, bait-and-switch, and disrespect. Here’s a quick recap:

— He accepted the UFC 71 fight with Chuck Liddell even though he needed another tune-up match to get over with American fans. When the fans booed him after the fight, it hurt him deeply. His subsequent fight against Dan Henderson was announced before he was told about it.

— He should have gotten an immediate rematch with Forrest Griffin because the fight was so close. He instead fought Wanderlei Silva while nursing a jaw injury, which was risky "because of all the drama that was happening to me at the time," then fought Keith Jardine "as a favor to the UFC instead of getting my belt back (which wasn’t even worth it to me financially)."

(Props: Fightlinker)

For those of you who didn’t watch it last night — which includes myself, so this post is as much for me as it is for you — here’s Chuck Liddell‘s debut performance on Dancing With the Stars. The first thing that sticks out is his voice in the intro. Liddell’s from Cali, but he’s taken so many blows to the head over the years that he’s starting to sound like a grizzled Sam Elliott. Anna Trebunskaya‘s main piece of advice to Chuck is to smile so he doesn’t come off as a psychopath. Things start out well enough, though the discomfort is obvious on Chuck’s face at the 2:27 mark, and there are a few obviously botched steps. It doesn’t help that Dana White and the Fertitta Brothers are in the front row, laughing their asses off at him the whole time.

Constructive criticism from the judges starts at 3:51: Bruno refers to Chuck as a "gentle neanderthal" and says he has some work to do. Carrie Ann Inaba calls him "smooth" but wants him to improve his footwork. The old guy in the middle asks him to get in touch with his feminine side, and is lucky he didn’t get punched out for it. Chuck’s combined score of 22 put him in 5th place among the eight celebs who competed last night.

(Apologies for the pop-up. Video courtesy of MMALinker.)

Floyd Mayweather defeated Juan Manuel Marquez last night in a one-sided unanimous decision that saw Money control every round and score a knockdown in the second frame. Mayweather landed 290 of 493 (59%) of his punches, compared to Marquez’s 69 of 583 (12%). At UFC 103 in Dallas, Dana White had the boxing match playing on a monitor near him. His verdict? "It sucked. It sucked just like I said it would and knew it would."

(Props: CageWriter)

Maybe Dana White locked himself in a bathroom at some point after hearing that Fedor vs. Rogers would be broadcast on CBS, and screamed until he cried. But at least he’s putting on a brave face for the media. Following a UFC 103 press conference held yesterday, White told Steve Cofield that Strikeforce on CBS is not a game-changer:

No, probably not. EliteXC reportedly hemorrhaged money during their run on CBS, because the license fee they received from the network wasn’t nearly enough to cover their expenses. Maybe Strikeforce was able to carve out a more satisfying deal than EliteXC did, but you have to assume that Strikeforce’s actual end-game is to build up enough interest in their brand on CBS that they can start putting on pay-per-view shows, which would theoretically be much more profitable. Until that happens, Dana White has enough problems of his own to worry about.

(Props: The DAM Show via CageWriter)

The days of Quinton Jackson being one of the UFC’s most dependable workhorses are over. After his second coaching stint on The Ultimate Fighter (which premieres tonight at 10 p.m.), Dana White was going to reward Rampage with a fight against arch-rival Rashad Evans in his hometown of Memphis. But the lure of mainstream stardom was impossible to resist, and that fight has been pushed back to TBA. Now, the logic of hosting UFC 107 in Memphis has been lost, the light-heavyweight title picture becomes a little more complicated, and White, who feels like he deserves more loyalty after standing by Jackson during his mental breakdown last year, is pretty pissed off:

(Props: youtube.com/UFC)

"What made Floyd Mayweather a pay-per-view star was Oscar De La Hoya. I know Floyd can’t sell tickets without Oscar but what’s happening here is, boxing is doing it to you again. They’re giving you the fight that you don’t want. Nobody asked for this fight with, ah, with Mayweather and, ah, what’s his name? What’s his name? Nobody even knows, nobody in this room even knows who Floyd’s fighting! I should know, I’m a big boxing guy and I respect the guy that he’s fighting, I know his name but I can’t think of it right now. But that’s my point, nobody gives a shit! Boxing is trying to sell you the fight that nobody cares about. People wanna see Mayweather/Pacquiao. But they’re not giving you that fight…

You show up to see Floyd Mayweather not fight. This guy will run around in circles. Everybody wants to know why the UFC is becoming so popular? It’s because they’re sick of boxers not fighting…basically you get to see ‘Dancing With the Stars’ again with Floyd Mayweather, except you have to pay for it this time…On that same night, on that UFC card, you guys can all tune in and you can watch not one fight, you guys can watch five great fights that night, for ten dollars less than what Floyd wants you to pay to see him run around in circles and lay on the ropes and move around and not fight."

Dana White may have muzzled his video blogs, but he won’t hesitate to lay down some verbal bitchsmack recorded against a green-screen when the situation calls for it. And Floyd Mayweather’s anti-MMA rhetoric has clearly gotten under his skin. Dana may have a point about Mayweather not setting up the matchup that fans want to see, but he should be careful about banging that drum too hard. After all, which fight did MMA fans ask for: Lesnar vs. Carwin or Lesnar vs. Fedor? When did we start clamoring for Franklin vs. Belfort? And by the way, Dana, Floyd’s opponent is Juan Manuel Marquez, and he’s fabulous.

Find more videos like this on BJPENN.COM
(Sorry, BJ, I couldn’t hear you over Dana’s shirt. Props to CageWriter for the tip.)

As first revealed on BJPenn.com, the UFC lightweight champ will return to action on December 12th at UFC 107 in Memphis. Strangely, the name "Diego Sanchez" wasn’t mentioned in the 40-second video update, though Sherdog reports that Sanchez has at least been offered the fight. UFC 107 is also slated to feature the TUF 10 coaches’ battle between Quinton Jackson and Rashad Evans, and will also reportedly feature Frank Mir vs. Cheick Kongo, and Thiago Alves vs. Paulo Thiago. (I wonder if they can get Paulo Alves to referee that fight?)

But wait a minute, weren’t Penn and Sanchez supposed to headline a third UFC card in November, possibly on a network? "Wait and see boys…if I can pull this off," Dana said at a press conference before UFC 102. Well, maybe he didn’t pull it off. Or maybe the unspecified network in question, like HBO in the past, wanted more control over production than White was willing to give up. At any rate, November 7th is currently looking like an open date on the calendar. You hear that, Strikeforce? November 7th. You think you can get your shit together by then?

("One more question, then I gotta get the fuck out of here. Yes, Helen Thomas. What’s on your mind, gorgeous?" Photo courtesy of Sherdog.)

The UFC held a press conference yesterday in Portland to discuss tomorrow night’s UFC 102 card, as well as other issues related to the organization’s future. Some highlights…

– Even though the UFC already has two events slated for November — UFC 105 (11/14, Manchester) and UFC 106 (11/21, Las Vegas) — Dana White revealed that a third November show was in the works, to be headlined by the lightweight championship fight between BJ Penn and Diego Sanchez; Penn/Sanchez was originally reported as the main event for #105. And get this: White said the tentative third November event wouldn’t be broadcast on pay-per-view or Spike. Could a network TV deal be in the works? “Wait and see boys… if I can pull this one off,” White said. "We’ve never had more [network] interest than right now. Obviously, I think all the hard work we’ve done over nine years and UFC 100 had a big part in it, too. I’m pretty confident we’re gonna have a deal very, very soon. I like what I’m hearing now more than I ever did before."

– Dana White may seem determined to counter-program Strikeforce to extinction, but his hostility has nothing to do with Scott Coker. Honestly. As he told reporters, “I’m not anti-Strikeforce, I don’t dislike those guys. I dislike Showtime, that’s who I dislike. I think they’re dicks, I don’t like them. I don’t like their attitude; they think they are better than they really are…The guy over at Showtime who I’m talking about knows who he is and I dislike him very much and my beef is with him, not really Strikeforce. They sucked at boxing, they got their ass kicked by HBO always at boxing yet they tried to stay in it. They got their ass kicked by HBO in programming, but they’re still around and they’re going to get their ass kicked in mixed martial arts too, just not by HBO.”

(Props: PunishmentFilms.tv/dragonman34)

How happy is Tito Ortiz to be back in the UFC? So happy that he would engage in an illicit homosexual kiss with his boss and former rival, Dana White. WHY ISN’T TMZ COVERING THIS?? Later, Ortiz revealed that White "had a hairy lip," and White scrubbed his tongue with steel wool.

After the jump: A quick video profile on new Octagon Girl Natasha Wicks (she’s not just a piece of meat, you guys — she has thoughts, emotions, and she loves the outdoors), some footage of Lyoto Machida training for Shogun, and an underrated Fedor Emelianenko fight, just because.