(Tom wishes a motherf*cker would call him t-shirt guy to his face.)

Affliction VP Tom Atencio saw a rare opening to take a shot at UFC president Dana White during the press conference to promote “Ultimate Chaos” in Biloxi, Miss., and damned if he didn’t make the most of it.  Atencio’s entering into his second MMA bout against Randy Hedderick, who as far as we know does not run either an MMA organization or a t-shirt company.  And while it’s not exactly like fighting for a UFC title, Atencio points out that at least he’s got the balls to do it, unlike some other promoters:

"I’ve been seen in front of the cameras before as far as the business side, but it’s time to fight. I’m doing something Dana White won’t do and that’s fight. He talks like a fighter, so why doesn’t he fight? I’m stepping up to the plate and win, lose or draw I attempted it. I don’t ever think he would fight."

(Don’t fear Arona.  Fear his freaking cat-like reflexes.)

Hey there, people who have been following MMA for more than just the last six months, remember Ricardo Arona?  Muscular Brazilian guy, had a rivalry with Wanderlei Silva, got knocked out by Sokoudjou…any of this ringing any bells?  Well now that Dana White has more or less ruled out any possibility of signing Arona to the UFC because, hell, even Dana thinks he can beat Arona, the big man is looking at making a return to action soon, possibly in Strikeforce.

("No one is going to tell [Liddell] when he’s going to stop fighting," says John Hackleman. Photo courtesy of MMA Ring Report.)

In his prime, he was a Destroyer of Worlds. But the Chuck Liddell we saw lose to Mauricio Rua at UFC 97 earlier this month was so deteriorated that retirement talk was inevitable. Liddell’s footwork was achingly slow, and Rua proved that the holes in the Iceman’s defense could be punctured even after Liddell had spent months trying to patch them up. (Though maybe not.) These facts were clearer to Dana White than anyone else. Directly after the event, White announced that Chuck would absolutely be retiring from the sport, profits be damned. Later, he promised "a fucking war" if Liddell refused to hang up his gloves, ostensibly because he didn’t want to see his longtime friend permanently injured.

Well, Chuck hasn’t retired yet. And Dana might get that fucking war after all.

(Props: Cage Writer)

Dana White received the Armed Forces Foundation’s Humanitarian Award, which he undoubtedly earned with all the fundraising work he’s done on behalf of American troops.  I mean seriously, the UFC put on an event to help injured soldiers when our own government couldn’t seem to find the money to treat them.  Most people would have just gone up there and accepted the award while saying a few words about how much the sacrifices made by American servicemen and women mean to him.  But Dana White isn’t most people.

(When he told her it was time to retire and give up the game for good, a tearful Paris Hilton told Dana: "But I am the game!" Only then did he fully understand the devils of fame and the ransom they demand. True story.)

- UFC president Dana White talked with Inside Fighting about the disappointing main event at UFC 97, and he also reiterated his commitment to keeping Chuck Liddell firmly in retirement, saying, “Believe me, it will be a fucking war if he tries not to retire, believe me.”  When pressed on other rapidly aging fighters who might need to be nudged into retirement, White admitted that Wanderlei Silva and Antonio Rodrigo Nogueira “are right there too and yes, I will pull the trigger on them too.”  Dear God, he’s not going to kill them, is he?!

- A crazy rumor on the information superhighway says that Fedor Emelianenko and Shinya Aoki will square off against each other in a special grappling match at the “Deep M-1 Challenge 3rd Edition” in Japan on April 29th.  I’ll pause a moment and let that one sink in.  If true this would be completely insane, but to deny that we would totally want to see it would be to deny the very curiosity of the spirit that makes us human, and we aren’t about to do that.

(Props: CageWriter)

Anderson Silva may not have had a problem with his performance at UFC 97, but Dana White wasn’t impressed, to put it mildly. Following Saturday’s excruciating main event, White sat down for an interview with Steve Cofield which quickly turned into an MMA version of Stewart/Cramer, with Cofield railing at the UFC prez for Silva‘s disrespectful showing, and White sheepishly taking the abuse. "I’m trying to wrap brain around this thing and figure this out, and I just cannot," White said. "I was seriously sitting in my seat going, ‘No, no this is not happening again’…I swear to God I wanted to leave tonight."

Echoing the thoughts of hundreds of thousands of screwed pay-per-view buyers, White said "I’ve never been embarrassed of a UFC fight like I was in the main event tonight." Dana now has the unenviable task of figuring out what to do next with Anderson Silva. The Spider is officially unreliable as a headliner (not that he ever drew big numbers), and Demian Maia’s impending title shot may have just gone up in smoke. Is a super-fight with Georges St. Pierre the only match that makes sense now?

Later in the interview, White re-states that Chuck Liddell is done fighting — for the UFC, or any other organization: "Yeah, he’s a big name, we could sell out arenas with him, we could still sell pay-per-views with him, but I don’t want to see that."

(Post-fight presser footage, via Versus.com)

Anderson Silva seems to be getting too used to disappointing fans.  Check the look on his face when a reporter takes him to task for not doing more to try and finish Thales Leites.  He seems more bored than anything else.  His manager and Chuck Liddell both get angry for him, but it’s as if Silva himself can’t be bothered with it.

Dana White will continue to defend Silva’s status as the world’s best pound-for-pound fighter, and he has a lot of good points, particularly about Fedor being “at a buffet in Russia,” and not at all interested in proving himself against the best in the world.  But at the same time, if the world’s best fighter can’t entertain anybody but himself, what’s the point?  

This is the second straight time Silva has left us bored and confused with his performance.  He’s so concerned with fighting a “perfect” fight, he doesn’t care whether anyone actually wants to see it.  That’s a problem.  The UFC set a North American attendance record with 21,451 people packed into the Bell Centre last night, and yet the organization’s best fighter may have spent five rounds proving to the audience in the venue and at home that he isn’t concerned in the least with giving them their money’s worth.

Mauricio "Shogun" Rua took home a $70,000 Knockout of the Night bonus for putting Chuck Liddell away, but he also ended "The Iceman’s" career with the TKO victory.  At least that’s what UFC prez Dana White said at the post-fight press conference, telling reporters "It’s over."

Liddell didn’t make any declarations that were quite so final, but he seemed resigned to the fact, admitting it was "probably the case" that he is now retired.  Man, what a downer.  Thanks a lot, Shogun.

The other $70,000 bonuses went to Matt Wiman and Sam Stout for Fight of the Night (really?), and Krzystof Soszynski for Submission of the Night.  Anderson Silva did not receive a bonus.  We imagine that when he asked Dana White why, Dana looked at him with disappointment in his eyes and said, ‘You know why.’

More videos are after the jump.

CageWriter brings us this video of UFC 97‘s headliners weighing in yesterday in Montreal. Anderson Silva established his dominance during the face-off, coming so close to Thales Leites that the challenger had to take a step backwards (3:45 mark); he’s lucky the Spider didn’t give him two for flinching. Don’t forget to come back to CagePotato.com tonight as we liveblog the action beginning at 10 p.m. ET / 7 p.m. PT.

Below: Yesterday’s edition of Dana White’s video blog, in which DW finally loses his UFC Undisputed championship title to Georges St. Pierre ("I think there was Vaseline on the controller"), hangs some more with his Army vet buddy, and gives his fighters the traditional F-bomb-laced pep talk.

Dana White UFC 97 Video Blog – 4/16/09 – Watch more Funny Videos

Well, it looks like we’re back in the regular rotation for these things. In this 4/16 edition of the Danavlog, Dana swings by the the Bell Centre for a UFC 97 press conference, shoots the shit with an Iraq War vet who he hooked up for the event, and does some high-stakes rock ‘n’ bowling with employee Marty Cordova. "You know he’s Mexican, right, he’s gonna try to pay me in pesos," Dana says at the 11:25 mark. Man, it’s like he won’t be happy until everybody hates him. Though it wasn’t shown in the video, DW gave a fairly interesting quote at the press conference about the UFC’s continued campaign of global (and local) domination:

Yesterday, Kenny Florian and Marc Ratner were at the Massachusetts State House fighting for the cause of MMA regulation, and things look promising. The battle continues in Ontario, and New York is still waiting for its MMA regulation bill to be voted on in the State Assembly. (Step on it, guys!)

(‘No, it isn’t funny. What happened to the dress I bought you? The one with an actual neckline? It’s like you want people to stare or something. Oh, now I get it.’)

You know what time it is.  Time to get serious about the important questions surrounding UFC 97.  Questions like, ‘What the hell are we getting for our money here?’ and ‘What’s up with your stupid face, stupid?’  That’s right.  It’s Ben vs. Ben time.

What exactly does Chuck Liddell have to do to prove that he’s still got it?  Is anything less than a devastating KO going to be enough?
 
BG: It’ll either have to be a knockout, or an incredibly dominant decision victory where all three judges score it 30-24 and Shogun Rua‘s face looks like hamburger afterwards. Here’s the deal: There’s no way that Shogun could have magically set the clock back to 2005 in the three months since he barely defeated Mark Coleman at UFC 93, and I think we all expect a shabby performance out of him tomorrow night. So Chuck basically has to prove that although he may no longer be able to hang with younger, more complete fighters, his skills haven’t deteriorated as much as Rua’s have.

If both fighters turn in mediocre efforts, the UFC will have a hard time figuring out what to do with them. (You can’t cut the winner and the loser. Can you?) That was probably Dana White’s motivation for calling out Liddell in public and demanding a dazzling performance — if Chuck fails again, there’s no obvious next step with him, promotion-wise. Do you throw him against talented up-and-comers like Luis Cane and Jon Jones, who might smash his old ass?  Do you try to build him back up against complete cans? Either way, he won’t be in important fights anymore, and that may not be an option for the UFC, or for Chuck himself.

BF: The only way a decision victory would be enough for Liddell is if a) Rua fights like it’s the 2005 Pride GP all over again, b) Chuck still comes close to finishing him several times, and c) after the fight all we can talk about is what amazing heart and conditioning Rua showed in merely surviving that assault.

(‘You pussies better not be writing any of this down.’)

Poor Dana White.  He can’t catch a break.  After being persecuted for his choice of words in the infamous ‘Other F-Word Blog,’ he’s still being victimized by the media.  As he explained to Neil Davidson of the Canadian Press, his vitriolic response to Loretta Hunt was little more than him taking advantage of the voice granted him by the powerful forces of the information age:

"Back in 1987, if the media wrote something about you, you were screwed," he said. "You had no voice, you couldn’t say anything back. Well now with the Internet, you can. You can come back. Yeah, did I go a little over the top? Absolutely, but that’s me. I am over the top and I was so pissed off about it. …"

Exactly.  Just one more reason why 1987 sucked compared to 2009.  The difficulty in acquiring pornography without leaving the house?  That’s another reason.  White also claims that the mainstream media outlets that rarely cover the UFC but picked up this bit of salacious news “used me,” which is true in a way.  It’s also true that the UFC uses the media to tell stories, hype fights, sell tickets and pay-per-views — and none of this is anything new.

According to Ronaldo “Jacare” Souza’s manager, they’re planning on a fight “for the title” at Dream.9 on May 26.  Nothing is confirmed yet, Jacare’s manager told Tatame, but right now it looks like it will be a rematch between Jacare and “Mayhem” Miller for Gegard Mousasi’s vacated middleweight belt.  If true that would make for a tight turnaround for Miller, who’s slated to take on Kala Hose in Hawaii at Kingdom MMA on April 18.  Call it making up for lost time.  Or maybe he’s just assuming that it won’t take much out of him to whup on Hose in front of his Hawaiian peeps.

– As we saw earlier today, Dana White’s threats to step back from the limelight might be the slightest bit hollow, but ESPN plans to actually make him talk on video when they send their E:60 crew to Montreal for a story on his recent video blog controversy.  The piece will allegedly seek to compare White to the heads of other major sports organizations, asking what would have happened to them had they gone all nasty on a female sports reporter and her anonymous sources.  We just hope E:60 has learned from their past mistakes.  If they ask him about steroids, the interview’s over.

– Spike TV sent out another ‘in your face!’ press release today to announce that Saturday night’s replay of UFC 94 was the “#1 program among Men 18-34 in all of television (cable and broadcast) during its time period.”  The replay peaked at 2.4 million viewers for the main event and averaged 1.9 million over the three-hour broadcast, which, as Spike is kind enough to point out, bested HBO’s Winky Wright/Paul Williams bout, which drew a measly 1.5 million viewers.  What you’re wondering is, did they mention how it compared to Strikeforce’s viewership?  They did not.  But they know you’re thinking about it anyway.

– Remember the rumored bout between Mark Coleman and Stephan Bonnar?  The UFC made it official for UFC 100 today, but relegated it to the “may not be broadcast” prelims.  On one hand, that’s a hell of a place to end up after such a great career (talking about Coleman, obviously. I said great career, not one great fight).  On the other hand, if there’s one UFC card where you can feel okay about being pushed to the prelims, it’s that one.

We’ve already told you that Dana White will be giving the video blogs a rest after that faggot-thing blew up in his face (no homo), and now there’s this new video that basically confirms it…OR DOES IT?!? Give it a look, and get ready for the most stunning shock ending since The Happening. (Are you fucking serious? The trees did it?) Basically, Dana White is the new Lenny Bruce now, or something. It is he who is persecuted. Props for the Bob Dylan-reference, I guess.

Below: Street-gays respond to Dana White’s recent hate-speech. We had no idea Greg Jackson was gay, but there he is, on the left, at the 1:14 mark. Audio very NSFW. +1 for the cameo by the HotForWords chick @ 0:39.

(Props: RicoRado)

(Props: MMA Scraps)

With Dana White laying low for a while, Chuck Liddell has been recruited to handle video blog duties in the days leading up to UFC 97 — and the Iceman quickly proves that he can be just as boring as his boss. Watch as Chuck does a radio appearance, hangs with boxing coach Howard Davis, defends Dana’s recent controversial vlog (without actually having seen it) and gets his toenails did.

Below: What, you thought the White Cure was just smoke-and-mirrors, player? News flash — it’s manna straight from heaven. After preparing for a fight by smoking weed and snorting Stevia, poet-warrior Dan Quinn taps out some guy at some show last week. Somebody tell Quinn’s cornerman Ross Clifton to join the pound-a-month club, stat…

(‘If I have offended any of you in any way, please line up right over there in the corner on top of that trap-door looking thing to receive your apology.’)

During Dana White’s brief apology tour following his use of the word that starts with “f” and rhymes with baguette in a recent video blog, he made two things abundantly clear: 1) he never meant to offend or attack gay people, and 2) he totally meant to offend and attack Loretta Hunt.  Amazingly, point #1 seemed to be good enough to get people to mostly forget about point #2, but now the Association for Women in Sports Media (the AWSM, if you’re nasty) is calling on White to apologize for calling Hunt a bunch of ugly words.

"This is disheartening because this behavior is unacceptable," (AWSM President) Jenni Carlson wrote. "It establishes a hostile work environment not only for Loretta but all women who cover the UFC. We cannot accept that any female sports journalist would have to work in an environment of intimidation or a hostile workplace. … It is a mystery to me that a man who is always seeking more coverage and exposure for his sport would disenfranchise some of the very people who are covering, sponsoring and watching his sport — women.”

("If I wasn’t a friend to the gays, do you think I’d be hanging out with this fuckin’ cocksucker?" Photo courtesy of Boston.com. Apologies to the crazy dude from Brotherhood. )

During an appearance on the CBS Radio show "The MMAsh," Dana White confirmed an earlier report which suggested he would be taking a reduced media role with the UFC due to the overwhelming amount of negative attention he received after a recent hate-speech-laced video-blog. Some key quotes, via FiveOuncesofPain:

(Translation: "If pussies get offended when I drop the words ‘faggot’ and ‘bitch’ in my angry rants, then fuck it all, because I gotta be me.")

After being called out by GLAAD for his use of the word "faggot" in his rage-filled pre-"Condit vs. Kampmann" rant, Dana White has stepped up with a formal-ish apology (see above), which leads into the fight-night edition of the Danavlog. As soon as he starts with the phrase "anybody who knows me," it’s clear that this might not be the most satisfying mea culpa. But he gives it his best shot, saying he’d never maliciously attack somebody who wasn’t attacking him, and "the last thing that I would ever want anybody to think about me or think is cool is to go out and attack somebody because of their sexual orientation." So, whatever; we’ll see if that smoothes things over. It’s worth noting that he doesn’t include any apology for calling Loretta Hunt a "fuckin’ dumb bitch," though as Kevin Iole points out, it was her own damn fault for getting called a dumb bitch in the first place. Yeesh, talk about blaming the victim.

After the apology, Dana checks in with the event’s fighters and has his requisite dick-punching session with Tiki Ghosn and Rampage. "What the fuck am I going to do with you two," Dana says at the 8:21 mark. "What are you gonna do with these two retards?" Expect an apology to the Special Needs Alliance to come early next week.

UPDATE, from f4wonline.com/Dave Meltzer:

Meltzer doesn’t cite any sources, and he’s misinformed on a regular basis, so treat this as a rumor.

Dana Whites Fight Night 18 video blog – Watch more free videos

…it isn’t going away so easily, not even after the UFC took it off YouTube.  For one, it’s still up elsewhere, such as Break, and for another, word has spread.  The Gay & Lesbian Alliance Against Defamation (known commonly as GLAAD) has denounced White’s use of the word “faggots” to describe the anonymous sources in Loretta Hunt’s article, and they’re calling on him to apologize publicly.

In the MMA blogosphere, MMA Payout wonders aloud whether sponsors like Bud Light and Harley-Davidson really want to be associated with that rant, and Cage Writer’s Maggie Hendricks reminds everyone that women also watch (and cover) the UFC, and generally don’t really like to hear men calling other women bitches.

(Being around all these skinny guys just made Dana want to gorge on buffalo wings even more. Photo courtesy of this set on CombatLifestyle.)

One of the many advantages of living on the East Coast is that these UFC Fight Night thingies are actually broadcast live for us. That may not be the case for some of you in the "flyover states," so check your local listings and maybe come back later if you want to avoid all spoilers. When you’re ready, hit that "Read More" link and refresh the page every few minutes for live updates from the Sommet Center in Nashville. Are you ready to see some local refs ruin some fights? Then let’s DO this!

Dana Whites Fight Night 18 video blog – Watch more free videos

Ho. Lee. Shit. Dana White is upset with Sherdog’s Loretta Hunt.  Like, really upset.  So much so that he spends the final three minutes of his Fight Night 18 video blog bashing her with language that would make Nixon blush.  Not that it’s surprising to hear the UFC prez throw around a handful of f-bombs (though it’s kind of funny since he just warned tonight’s fighters against swearing on Spike TV), but to hear him call a female reporter a bitch…wow.  If his mother is anything like mine, there’s going to be a very stern voicemail message on his phone tonight.

Apparently Hunt’s article about some managers being stripped of backstage credentials really touched a nerve.  White says it’s all crap and offers an explanation for why this is a non-story, while also pausing to go off on a tangent about Hunt’s comments in that Matt Lindland documentary.  Clearly some old hurts are rising to the surface here.  You can’t keep those feelings bottled up forever.  It isn’t healthy.

I don’t know if all this means we should pay more attention to the allegations in the article (made by anonymous sources, who are apparently pussies for not wanting to bring the Danawrath upon themselves) or less, but either way it’s kind of a bizarre accomplishment to get your name mentioned so much in one of D.W.’s video blogs.  Kind of like getting punked in a Jay-Z song.  At least people know who you are afterwards, right Prodigy?

(Props: MMA Weekly)

Good news for Ultimate Fighter fans who have become increasingly turned off by the idiotic antics in the TUF house — and bad news for those who hoped that maybe this could be the season when the reality show savages literally burn the house to the ground. From MMA Weekly:

So nobody gets threatened with eviction for fighting or glass-throwing. (Pussies!) But don’t worry, because the show will still bring drama in other ways:

Be honest, Dana: Does Bisping stick Henderson’s toothbrush up his own ass and take a picture of it, or is it the other way around?

It’s weird, because there was a time when Americans and Brits were allies; now we fucking hate each other, apparently. Oh well. Get ready to root against those snaggle-toothed chavs tonight starting at 10 p.m. ET/PT.

(Via RawVegas.tv)

Well, this is far less awkward than Wanderlei Silva’s advertisement/guided tour of his own gym, because this time around we have a native English speaker to help us make sense of what the hell’s happening.  Dave Farra is also crafty enough to use the tour of the facility as a ruse to ask Silva the hard questions, like, does he think GSP cheated?  ("He dominate the fight, he don’t need this, no?")  Does he want another shot at “Rampage” Jackson?  ("Of course.")  ‘Sup with the playground?  ("The kids need to have fun too, you know?")

I’m satisfied with those answers.  Although I am surprised to hear that Silva had a six-month training camp before the Jackson fight.  On one hand, that can’t be a good idea.  On the other hand, if only you could put Silva’s work ethic in B.J. Penn‘s body.

After the jump, Dana White talks more about the death of TapouT’s “Mask” and explains why the news hit Chuck Liddell especially hard.

(Props: Spike.com. Click the image to see the video.) 

Spike TV has released a new preview clip for The Ultimate Fighter: United States vs. United Kingdom (premiering April 1st at 10 p.m. ET/PT), in which UFC prez Dana White arrives at Wolfslair to check out the British hopefuls during the elimination round. We learn that before their fight at UFC 93, Rich Franklin and Dan Henderson both had to fly to England to assess the talent, just in case, and we get a taste of the first indecipherable British accent when Gary Kelly pronounces "my record" as "me lachoad." Unsurprisingly, Gary is the brother of Paul Kelly, who has already become infamous for his post-fight interviews. Where the hell are these two from, anyway? Mushmouth-upon-Tyne?

(Go ahead.  Tell Chuck you forgot to order the ice cream cake for his birthday party.  I’m sure he’ll understand.)

As Chuck Liddell prepares to try and prove to Dana White and the rest of the MMA world that he still belongs in the UFC, some recent comments seem to suggest that he maybe he has suffered serious head trauma after all.  Regarding his goal to take back the UFC light heavyweight strap, Liddell told Fighters Only:

“I don’t plan on letting [Rashad Evans] stay champ for long. I thought I was winning that fight. I made a mistake, got caught and dropped. I was winning the fight up until then.  People ask me about retiring after that fight. It wasn’t like I got my ass kicked and then got knocked out. I was winning the fight, got sloppy for a second and got caught. I made a mistake.”

[Sigh]  I can’t help but feel like he’s using the old ‘got caught’ explanation as a crutch here.  Yes, he got caught in the sense that he left himself wide open and was absolutely hammered by a right hand from Evans.  But he wasn’t really winning the fight up until then.  He wasn’t losing, either.  The fight was fairly even with little significant action.  And then he got knocked out.

(The #1 clown in Las Vegas poses with some guy named Charlie. Props: CharlieTheClown.net via MMA Splatter.)

“How do I feel about them trying to counter-program UFC 100? I love it. I fucking love it. I love it. I don’t like these guys and I want to see them spend more of their t-shirt money. What they should be worrying about is — they’ve already seen first hand that nobody gives a shit about Affliction MMA — what they need to start worrying about is nobody wants to wear their goofy fucking clothes anymore either. The fad is over and they better start saving as much of that t-shirt money as they can.” — DW to FiveOuncesofPain, regarding the recent reports that Affliction will hold its third (and likely final) event on July 11th, the same day as UFC 100.

"I called BJ to tell him to stop with the BS and to start fucking training." — DW on Sirius Radio yesterday (via BloodyElbow). Our thoughts exactly.

"Apparently he doesn’t know what guys who are on steroids look like, okay? They don’t fuckin’ look like me…You know what I’m on? I’m on fuckin’ pizza, chicken fingers, and cheeseburgers, okay?…Pregnant bitches don’t eat as much as fuckin’ I do right now." — DW responds to allegations made by Tiki Ghosn that he’s a steroid abuser, in a new video for Trumph United (via CageWriter).

(Please just tell me there’s a dancing seminar by Gono.)

The UFC sent out an email today announcing their first ever UFC Fan Expo around UFC 100 in Las Vegas this summer.  It includes training demos, autotgraph sessions, and “keynote addresses,” possibly from Dana White and/or Lorenzo Fertitta (though details on anything are very sketchy at the moment).  Basically, a lot of fun stuff for UFC fans in the days leading up to what is supposed to be the biggest UFC event to date.  Sounds great.

The trouble is, you have to buy a ticket, and they aren’t cheap.  You can get a two-day pass for $50 if you buy in advance, or a one-day pass for $30.  This way the UFC gets you to pay for the fights, whether you watch them live or on pay-per-view, and also gets you to pay for some idle entertainment before the fights, like watching Matt Hughes demonstrate how he choked out Frank Trigg’s pompous ass, or listening to Dana White swear his way through a speech about professionalism and ethics in business. 

Okay, those things would both be worth paying for.

If you’re headed to Vegas for UFC 100 you should a) put aside some money to buy me a beer at the Hofbrauhaus, and b) keep an eye on this website for Expo information.  It doesn’t offer much help at the moment since they just announced it, but the last question on the Frequently Asked Questions list is worth a chuckle:

(As long as he still has his hearing, he’ll always have a puncher’s chance. Props to AmidaHidan.)

Like Kendall Grove before him, UFC president Dana White has made it clear that Chuck Liddell‘s job might be on the line if he doesn’t step up his game. The Iceman, who has lost three of his last four fights, takes on Mauricio "Shogun" Rua at UFC 97 (April 18th, Montreal) and simply winning might not be enough. As White explains to the Telegraph-Journal:

We assumed that because of his drawing power and history with the company, Liddell would be able to fight in the UFC for as long as he wanted to. But it sounds like Dana is genuinely concerned for Chuck’s health. His reaction time is slowing, and rival fighters have figured out the increasingly predictable holes in his standup game. That only translates to more brain-rattling KO losses in the future.

Luckily, Mauricio Rua is as good a comeback opponent as any. If Shogun shows up in the kind of piss-poor shape he was in for the Mark Coleman fight in January, Liddell has a great chance of coming out on top, and maybe even "dazzling" his boss with a dramatic knockout. And if that happens, it’ll be interesting to see if Rua is given a similar "win big or get lost" ultimatum for his next fight — or if he’s simply fired on the spot.

The full 12-fight lineup for UFC 97 was confirmed on Friday; you can check it out after the jump.

(‘Let’s see how you like going up against a greased up Canadian and Lyoto Machida, you f*ckers.  I promise you it isn’t as much fun as it sounds.’)

Though he’s been uncharacteristically complimentary of Scott Coker’s Strikeforce operation, even after their move into the big time with the purchase of select Pro Elite assets, that doesn’t mean Dana White is content to let them operate free from any UFC interference.  When Strikeforce makes its Showtime debut with Diaz-Shamrock on April 11, the UFC will pull one of its favorite counter-programming tactics, running a popular recent pay-per-event for free on Spike TV the same night.

Strikeforce will go up against UFC 94, as Dana White and Co. attempt to draw fans away from the competing organization with the main event that made “Vaseline” a popular keyword term for MMA websites everywhere.  If anybody’s up for that challenge, it’s probably Frank Shamrock and Nick Diaz, who will say enough crazy things in the run-up to the bout to make you forget all about crazy things of the past.

(Fight night Danavlog reveals that someone is a little self-conscious about his weight.)

The UFC paid out $762,000 in base fighter payroll for UFC 96 in Columbus, Ohio, and they dispersed this money according to their usual principles: from each according to his ability, to each according to his marketability.  Full disclosed payout figures are below.  For a more accurate accounting, imagine Rampage Jackson, Keith Jardine, and Matt Hamill all pocketing an extra $60,000 for their end of the night bonuses:

Quinton Jackson — $325,000 (includes $100,000 win bonus)
Keith Jardine — $55,000
Shane Carwin — $32,000 (includes $16,000 win bonus)
Gabriel Gonzaga: $60,000
Matt Brown — $16,000 (includes $8,000 win bonus)
Pete Sell — $12,000
Matt Hamill — $40,000 ($20,000 win bonus)
Mark Munoz — $12,000
Gray Maynard — $20,000 (includes $10,000 win bonus)
Jim Miller — $9,000
Tamdan McCrory — $20,000 (includes $10,000 win bonus)
Ryan Madigan — $3,000
Kendall Grove — $44,000 (includes $22,000 win bonus)
Jason Day — $5,000
Jason Brilz — $10,000 (includes $5,000 win bonus)
Tim Boetsch — $12,000
Brandon Vera — $60,000 (includes $30,000 win bonus)
Michael Patt — $5,000
Shane Nelson — $16,000 (includes $8,000 win bonus
Aaron Riley — $6,000